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Psychology of Glasses

02 Feb 2018, 09:16

thanks. sometimes websites need an email address to stop ad blocking and send me stupid shit i don't want. i'll just use this yours.

tinyeyes 02 Feb 2018, 07:12

I realize I gave an incorrect email address. Its tinyeyes2@hotmail.com.

GreginColo 01 Feb 2018, 22:54

Thanks tineyes for your thoughts in followup to Jake's original posts, which I also found very interesting and can certainly relate to. I can also very much relate to what you said about generational differences. I came of age before internet porn, so while my (very) secret interest and fascination was myopic guys, but much of it was left to my own imagination, and certainly not something I could ever share with anyone else. I was pretty certain there was no one else in the world who held this strange fascination for myopic guys.

One of the beauties of the internet is learning there are other guys with similar interests. And as you mentioned, due to the efforts of others with such interest, it is much easier today to find sites dedicated to myopic men, to help complete the fantasy. It no doubt has been a driver of my life, and who I might look for in a relationship. As one looks at people for personal relationships, there are certainly many factors to consider, but a guy with thick minus glasses sure adds to the attractiveness of a guy, to me anyway. Hard to understand, hard to explain, but hope I am making sense to some of you.

Cactus Jack 01 Feb 2018, 21:14

tinyeyes,

Usually, multiple posts are caused by the server being slow to physically accept your post. There is a clue that your post will be accepted, when the server gets around to it, is that the "Submit" button changes to a Blue Background with a White "Submit".

Sometimes it changes to Blue very briefly and other times it changes to the Blue background until it is uploaded. If you see the Blue background, don't click again until you are sure that it has not uploaded.

tinyeyes 01 Feb 2018, 20:14

Well, somehow my post got multi-posted. can someone please delete all but one?

tinyeyes 01 Feb 2018, 20:13

Hi Jake,

Your post was so interesting! I'm gay but have experienced many of the same things you talk about in my life. I have also wondered if fantasizing about glasses and fixating on that was robbing me of better sex and relationships. I don't really have a clear answer, and I almost don't want to know, but I have a feeling it's affected me, but also, the fetish is part of me, so I could never run away from it entirely.

Anyway, I wanted to share with you something I only heard of recently, called "NoFap". Basically, this is a movement that involves guys trying to stop looking at pornography and stop masturbating (one or the other or both). It's not so much for religious or moral reasons, but more for "real life" improvement. When I heard about it I was shocked, but I can see how this could be good for those guys who really do it. Look up NoFap and you will find a lot about it out there, including a lot of YouTube bloggers talking about it. I'm not personally doing this, but it seems to speak to many of the concerns that you have. Easier said than done, of course!

Another interesting thing that I came across when I researched Nofap is that this porn addiction thing is very different, and maybe more pronounced, for younger guys, because they've always had internet porn available since they hit puberty. For older guys, even if they use it a lot now, it wasn't available at a younger age so there was a time when they had to use their imaginations a lot more. It's hard to imagine, but maybe that was a good thing! And, it may be easier for older guys to "get off" the porn if that's what they want to do, than for younger guys.

I can definitely remember a time when I had to fuel my fantasies with my own thoughts, drawings I would make, stories I read (including here on Eyescene in the early days) or memories of people I met. Totally different from now, when I can find a wide selection of guys with thick glasses on Instagram or Tumblr or whatever.

Hope this helps in some way! Feel free to email me at tinyeyes@hotmail.com.

tinyeyes 01 Feb 2018, 20:13

Hi Jake,

Hope this helps in some way! Feel free to email me at tinyeyes@hotmail.com.

tinyeyes 01 Feb 2018, 20:13

Hi Jake,

Hope this helps in some way! Feel free to email me at tinyeyes@hotmail.com.

tinyeyes 01 Feb 2018, 20:13

Hi Jake,

Hope this helps in some way! Feel free to email me at tinyeyes@hotmail.com.

tinyeyes 01 Feb 2018, 20:13

Hi Jake,

Hope this helps in some way! Feel free to email me at tinyeyes@hotmail.com.

tinyeyes 01 Feb 2018, 20:13

Hi Jake,

Hope this helps in some way! Feel free to email me at tinyeyes@hotmail.com.

tinyeyes 01 Feb 2018, 20:13

Hi Jake,

Hope this helps in some way! Feel free to email me at tinyeyes@hotmail.com.

specs4ever 17 Jan 2018, 06:36

well - my name is of course not Jake - I hate to tell you this, but from my experiences over the years your glasses fetish is not going to diminish. In fact it is going to get worse as you get older if my life is any guideline. I found I liked glasses at an early age - grade 1 for sure as my grade 1 and grade 2 teacher(same one both grades) wore very strong minus glasses and I was fascinated by them. As time went on i found I was attracted to the girls in school that wore glasses, or had just gotten glasses. I dated as much as possible - girls that wore glasses for the most part. I married a girl who wore glasses, but only when she wasn't wearing contacts. Throughout our marriage she wore glasses less and less, and finally had lasik surgery, so no more glasses for me. But during my years of marriage my glasses fetish - or obsession increased. Now my dream girl needs to have at least a -15D or better prescription.

I often wonder if I had met and married a girl with a high prescription who did not wear contacts if I would have nipped my obsession in the bud. Or, possibly it might have made it stronger even earlier.

If you do reach your goal of around -10D, and if you do find a girlfriend/wife who wears strong glasses or contacts, possibly you might be able to concentrate on other things. I hope this does work out for you, as I have had this fetish thing for at least 65 years. And Jake, pardon my sarcasm about your name at the beginning. No one here expects you to use your real name.

Weirdeyes 17 Jan 2018, 01:28

It seems like I keep getting karma whenever I make less than kind observations about peoples glasses in my head. One time there was this guy who said he only wears glasses because he has bad vision in one eye. This was before I wore glasses, so I pitied him. I was glad I had good vision in both eyes. Which I found out wasnt true. I guess that explained my sport phobia.

Another time was when I was looking at this guys glasses. He had some pretty strong astigmatism correction in one eye. I thought it was so weird how things looked squished through one lens. I ended up needing some pretty strong cyl.

Another time was when I was joking around with some over the counter reading glasses. I did wear glasses, but they were pretty weak. I thought the +4.00 glasses were so thick. I later ended up needing that prescription later on. Another thing that I remember was this girl who wore thick wire rim plus glasses. I thought they were super thick and strong, but I didnt say anything. I wore +3.25 in my left eye at the time. I later overheard her saying they were +5.00. Now it looks like my prescription might change to that.

JerryJingle 05 Jan 2018, 06:35

Jake - hope you've had a good 2018 so far.

I'd like to email regarding the points you articulated, if you are still up for it.

JerryJingle 02 Jan 2018, 07:23

Jake,

Pretty much everything you've written thus far reflects my life as a high myope and a glasses fetishist. I'm a straight male in my late 30's and I struggle daily with the same desires and challenges you articulate.

I would love to correspond via email and/or chat to discuss coping mechanisms and how to deal our fetish in the context of "normal," healthy romantic relationships.

Please email me at jerryjingle2442@gmail.com - hope to hear from you.

"Jerry"

Dave 02 Jan 2018, 04:38

Jake,

I'm a low minus contacts wearer (-3), too vain to wear glasses for work. And yet, I fantasize constantly about becoming a full-time wearer and/or having sex with bespectacled women (my girlfriend is sadly only a part-time wearer). Have you tried having sex while wearing glasses? The only time I wear my glasses full-time is at weekends or on vacation. Luckily, these are the times when I have sex! Making love while wearing glasses is a real turn-on. My girlfriend has never questioned it - I'm sure she thinks I've forgotten to take them off! I'm sure ditching the contacts and going full-time with glasses would cure me of my fetish, but I don't think I would want that particularly.

William 01 Jan 2018, 09:27

Happy New Year. Jake hope all is well.

Kingsmen 01 Jan 2018, 03:04

Jake, you can email me at miketanner2012@yahoo.com if you like.

GreginColo 31 Dec 2017, 10:50

Jake, I would also like to share some more private correspondence if you are ok with such. I am in the US, mountain time zone, and like you try to not let it dominate my life, but it sometimes does. My email is gbruny@hotmail.com. Thanks, Greg.

Kevin 31 Dec 2017, 08:59

Jake - I have a pair of thick semi-rimless glasses. Would love to show you sometime.

William 31 Dec 2017, 08:44

williammorris48@outlook.com

Jake 31 Dec 2017, 08:23

William and Greg, thanks a million for the kind and thoughtful responses. Just hearing that other have had similar experiences is infinitely helpful.

William: I'd be thrilled to correspond via e-mail. Unfortunately all of my e-mail addresses have my last name or University name; if you could give me yours or one you have for such correspondence I'll shoot you an e-mail. Thanks again for sharing your experiences and advice, which I will readily implement.

I'm sensitive to the fact that this site is not a forum for people to rant about their lives, so I'll allow myself one more long-ish post to share some more info. I would be very grateful at the opportunity to update eyescene on my progress, as despite its recent ups-and-downs I do love this community.

I've more or less come to terms with the fact that this is a part of me. I've considered GOC but I get plenty aroused from my own glasses - especially given that my prescription is still rising by at least -1 a year and will probably hit -10.

As William pointed out, my goal would be to reach a state where I not only can deliver in bed but - much more importantly for me at this point - where my fetish isn't dominating my life. It is, in many ways, like an addiction that's even more hardwired than classic addictions like alcoholism: my rational brain tells me that I have an amazing life, that I've been dealt a good hand and can go very far. But the slightest fantasy, or thought of checking eyescene, or even sometimes getting a comment on my own glasses (I wear contacts a lot of the time) and it's game over. I'm especially aroused by semi-rimless frames with thick lenses and by the thought of someone wearing thick glasses and still needing an increase. Just writing these words already makes me aroused. It's gotten that "bad".

All of this leads to constant fantasizing and self-gratification; I just cannot help myself most of the time. Not only is it a massive time sink, my biggest concern is that it's negatively impacting my non-sexual life: it's impacted my sharpness, my sleep, and my sanity. I'm not even as much concerned about real-life sightings as I am with internet content. I can literally get off on the same video a hundred times, and I'm pretty sure us glasses fetishists can get aroused a lot faster from glasses than "normal" people from conventional things.

As much as I've denied it to myself, I think it's clear to me that this addiction is what's stopping me from living a fulfilled life. Nothing more and nothing less.

Again, both the responses so far have been amazing. Any other thoughts, or shared experiences are of course much appreciated.

Thanks,

GreginColo 31 Dec 2017, 07:33

Hi "Jake", thanks for your candid and heartfelt post. While I likely don't have any answers for you, but rather empathy, as likely with others who enjoy this site will have. Whether our personal sexual orientation is straight, gay, or somewhere in between, the added impact of the visual fetish side of it can, as you know, become quite strong. In my case it began, or at least the first memory of being aware of it, was in 2nd grade.

I began wearing glasses myself in 4th grade with a a myopic progression very similar to yours. Decades later I had lasik surgery to correct my myopia, thinking that might reduce or eliminate the fetish if my own vision required little or no correction. Well that certainly was not the case and now I regret the surgery, but not enough to try and have it reversed. So I guess it's kind of a self-acceptance of something that will likely not change for you, as well as finding an accepting partner, who while may not understand that part of you, at least accepts it, as the prior poster mentioned was the case for him. Best of luck to you and I hope you keep in touch and us apprised to your life journey. Regards, Greg (real name).

William 31 Dec 2017, 06:37

Hi Jake,

You could so easily have been talking about me six years ago. My fetish before meeting a girlfriend was self contained and very private. I experienced exactly the same as you described, sex brought a new crisis.

I would like to say to you I have cured myself but that is not true. I tried denial of the fetish but my performance in bed was still unsatisfactory.

My natural Rx is similar,-8.5/-9, and I found wearing my glasses during sex helped a bit. I decided to buy cheap online glasses with a higher Rx and managed to get to-13 with bifocals for reading. This was an improvement as I liked to wear them in bed.

A breakthrough came when the following year I started wearing plus contacts and stronger glasses, myodiscs gave a terrific boost. By now my girlfriend, now my wife, began asking about my glasses. The final step was to confide in her. Rather than take the mick she was supportive and treats them like my personal sex toy.

Sex is great, we have a son and another baby due soon. I GOC fulltime and during sex and it is not an issue. I stuck with the idea of using gas permeable contacts and suffered agony until now I keep them in a whole week. I wear powerful myodiscs everywhere.

I am not cured, just managing my condition. There are times I lose it. Before Christmas I was on a train from Oxford to London. A man got on and sat opposite, he was wearing sunglasses and I took little notice. When the train left the station he took off his sunglasses and put them in a case. He then slowly took out a pair of glasses which immediately caught my eye, myodiscs. He cleaned them and put them on, wow such strong glasses rarely seen in public. Instantly I was rock hard and very uncomfortable. Without thinking I blurted out that I liked his glasses and they were similar to mine. Somewhat surprised he agreed and we chatted about myodiscs. His were regular myos mine my preferred myos in a plus carrier. He had wanted to change to plus carriers but had never tried any. We exchanged glasses and wow our Rx's very similar in early -30 region. I ejaculated bigtime and tried to control by gritting my teeth. So this shows I am not cured but almost in control.

Ask any questions. If you prefer we could email.

Jake 31 Dec 2017, 01:11

Hi Folks,

As a disclaimer, this is going to be a long post and an appeal for help. If you're not in the mood to hear a rant, feel free to skip. But any help would be greatly appreciated. Most people would laugh at what I'm about to share, but if anyone can understand my predicament it's this community. I'm also going to share a lot of intimate details, but at this point I don't give a shit (my name is of course not Jake).

I am a male college student in my early twenties. By most standards, I've had a successful life: good grades, good university, I've gone very far in extracurriculars, I have a great circle of friends, and this year I met the girl of my dreams. Caveat one: my life is getting progressively more stressful, as I'm working to pay my share of the tuition, taking difficult classes, trying to manage my social life, and trying to decide on a career path. If you meet me, you'll probably think of me as a normal, solid dude (important given what I'm about to share).

Caveat two: as you can probably guess, I have a glasses fetish. A massive one. I've had it since an early age; my first crush was on a highly nearsighted girl in sixth grade. I don't know how or why it arose; I myself am fairly nearsighted (-7.50), I don't know if this directly relates to my fetish as I developed it before I got my first pair of glasses (my prescription skyrocketed in high school). I've kept the fetish completely to myself, but it has progressively gotten more "severe." Especially when I discovered self-gratification and eyescene at around 17, it's been a pretty big part of my life and a tempting escape. Tempting quickly became very tempting. As I entered college and my life became more stressful, it got somewhat out of control. I began to masturbate 2-3 times a day, exclusively to instagram/youtube content posted on eyescene; and I found myself constantly fantasizing, even sometimes to my own glasses (which are semi-rimless and thick) and it getting progressively worse, eye exams, etc.

Every time I see "high minus" on Seen on the Web (despite myself: kudos, Jim H.), I just lose control. Again, I can't explain how this started or why it's progressed to this point, but it's a problem. I don't think I need to elaborate further - most veteran users of the site know what it is we're up against :)

Part three: I met my girlfriend about two months ago, which has been amazing. She is slightly nearsighted and wears contacts most of the time; and, as you can guess, I found it very difficult to get aroused at first, even though my brain tells me I have a massive crush on her (and of course we love each other as people). I eventually managed, but I've been barely able to deliver during sex (even while trying to fantasize about glasses during the process), which I can tell has frustrated and somewhat puzzled her. I've cast it off to anxiety/lack of experience, but if this continues it might be a problem. I have never found pornography appealing and have gotten off exclusively on glasses fetish content. With that said, I have, of course, found girls without glasses "attractive" and had sexual thoughts, but they're definitely muted compared to the glasses fetish.

I think you get the drift. Believe it or not, this has become a pretty big problem, both with my girlfriend and with my life. I realize that it's quite ironic to post this on eyescene, but I'm somewhat at the end of my rope. In many ways, I lead a fulfilling life with plenty of interesting stuff happening, but this is such a tempting escape that I just can't control myself. Additionally, it's spawned an internet addiction and I can feel my brain melting away. I just don't know how to deal with this. Get off the Internet? Try to reprogram my brain? Start watching conventional pornography?

Any advice, help, or just thoughts would be MASSIVELY appreciated. You can choose to believe any or all of what I just shared (I'm aware of the paranoia about "fakes"), but hopefully basic human trust will prevail :)

Thanks a lot in advance,

"Jake"

Carrie 12 Dec 2017, 15:18

Weirdeyes - my prescription is sph L+3.25 and R+3.75 and cyl -0.50 L&R.;

Lou 12 Dec 2017, 07:44

Hi NNVisitor

Thanks. Sensible advice and what I previously did. After experiencing the dual problem of horrible eye strain without glasses and them seeming too strong if I wore them to a band practice/orchestral rehearsal later in the day, after a day of accommodating without them, my optician suggested wearing them all day from the moment I got up.

Obviously, I take them off to go in the shower etc., which isn't really any different, but since I have been wearing my glasses full-time, I've had no eye strain, and gradually over the course of a week, the problem of my glasses seeming too strong later in the evening resolved to the point that it now occurs rarely, usually specifically after having done a lot of close work.

I have a feeling that presbyopia starting since I am almost 44 and don't yet have a reading add, may be contributing this, as my eye muscles are having to work harder for close work, which exacerbates my tendency to accommodate.

If for any reason, I keep taking my glasses off for extended periods, both issues seem to start up again, I feel my eyes gripping and it takes time to relax my eyes with my glasses on.

For this reason, I'm trying to leave them on as much as possible. Probably heavy rain is one of those situations when it is just not sensible.

I'm not really sure why I have this tendency to try to accommodate over a very small prescription. My optician said that it is probably owing to me being very visually sensitive and trying to see as well as possible all the time. I also feel that there may be some link with me also compensating for convergence insufficiency. Whatever the cause, I get horrible eye strain without glasses.

Thanks very much again.

Best wishes

Lou

NNVisitor 11 Dec 2017, 21:57

Lou

If it's raining a lot outside don't wear your glasses outside in the rain. Once in your car you can put them back on.

Weirdeyes 11 Dec 2017, 17:44

Carrie

How strong are your current glasses again?

Carrie 11 Dec 2017, 14:22

Soundmanpt - I had to laugh at myself for doing that, but I was glad that Gemma was out of the room so didn't see me do it!

I am very fussy about the cleanliness of my lenses so the moment I notice a speck of dust or dirt I have to clean it off immediately. I do this with the little cloth that you get in your case. Every few days I do a very thorough clean with warm soapy water. That is for the whole frame as well as the lenses.

I clean my glasses just as much, possibly more, as I did when I first got glasses.

I also like the feel of my lenses between my thumb and forefinger when I clean them. My lenses aren't very thick but they are thicker than my first ones. This does give me a little tingle inside knowing that they are my lenses.

Lou 11 Dec 2017, 09:41

I'm not sure quite sure what thread to post this to, so hopefully this one will do.

My regularglasses have the Specsavers UltraClear coating. Not the new one as shown on the link below, but the old style coating:

https://www.specsavers.co.uk/offers/free-ultraclear-superclean-treatment

With the old-style coating, I do find it a bit of a nuisance in the rain. Yes, it does seem to repel water to some extent, but if it is raining fairly heavily, then wiping loads of water off the lenses leaves smudges in the coating,that then have to be carefully wiped off with a good microfibre cloth (personally I've found the calocloth by calotherm to be the best but I digress), which is hardly practical when going in and out of the rain.

This morning, something odd happened to my glasses. I was doing the school run, when a bit of ice or snow fell off a tree and hit the left side of my glasses, resulting in the left lens misting up like it does when you come inside from the cold. It didn't immediately clear, so I had to take off my glasses and hold them in my hand. The lens had cleared by the time I got back to my car, but my glasses were absolutely covered in rain spots. Bearing in mind what I said above, about having to wipe off all the rain with one cloth, then spend some time getting all the resultant smudges off the ultraclear coating with another cloth, I decided to drive home without my glasses, and clean them when I got home in the warm.

In each eye, I have 6/6 vision (UK equivalent of 20/20) without glasses and 6/5 + 1 (basically one further line on the eye chart, plus a letter from the line below) with. Since I technically have 20/20 vision without glasses, although like many others my eyes are capable of seeing better than this, and I see only 20/20 owing to astigmatism, I of course can legally drive without glasses. I was therefore surprised when driving without glasses for the first time in ages, just what difference my glasses usually make, as I found that I couldn't see signs until closer than normal. I suppose that this was to be expected, but with a prescription of only R +0.50 Sph -0.50 Cyl and L +0.25 Sph -0.25 Cyl, which I wear primarily owing to eye strain, I was surprised to notice such a difference.

When I got home, I got out a pair of spare glasses with no anti-reflective coating, which I can easily wipe with any reasonable microfibre cloth.

Best wishes

Lou

Soundmanpt 10 Dec 2017, 09:35

Carrie

Sorry Carrie I had to laugh when I read what you done. But look at it this way, it would have been much worse if you had done that with other people around and they saw you do it. But being alone no harm and no foul only you know how silly that was. But in your defense if you weren't fully awake even with your glasses on your eyes probably weren't open enough for you to see very well anyway. So that is likely why you didn't think you had your glasses on. You only had to reclean the lens you smudged so not like you had to do a complete cleaning of your glasses. Just curious on an average day how often do you clean your glasses? I'm guessing not more than 2 or 3 times a day. Do you remember when you first got glasses? How often were you cleaning your glasses back then? Usually when anyone first gets glasses they feel like their glasses are constantly dirty and need cleaning. I think it's all about getting used to wearing glasses.

Carrie 09 Dec 2017, 17:19

I wasn't sure what category to put this in so I picked this one as it seemed about right.

A lot of glasses wearers, me included, get the "ghost glasses" effect when you think you can feel your glasses on your face when they are not on. I had the opposite today. I forgot I WAS wearing my glasses and went to scratch an itch on my eyelid but of course my glasses got in the way and I put a great big smudgey finger print on the lens!😄

In my defense I wasn't fully awake when I did it so I didn't notice that I could see properly. It was a bit annoying as I had given my glasses a really good clean the night before!

Lou 08 Aug 2017, 13:25

Hi again NNVisitor

Sorry, I meant to thank you very much for sharing your story. I can fully appreciate how you must have felt as a 15 year old, and person in your early twenties.

All the best

Lou

Lou 08 Aug 2017, 13:23

Hi NNVisitor

Thanks very much for your understanding words.

The daft thing is that I am completely comfortable with my appearance in glasses. I feel that I've chosen some frames that suit me, and having worn glasses since the beginning of 2010, I have two self images, one with and one without glasses. I have four different pairs of glasses which I've collected over the years and put my current prescription into, all are a smaller shallower version (owing to my fairly small size) of the plastic style which is currently popular, all are pretty bold, and one pair is even bright red.

My orchestra colleagues have only seen me in glasses, apart from on one occasion when I managed to forget my glasses, and one player asked me if I had gotten contacts or whether I could see ok without, which to be honest, although I didn't mind them asking, made me feel uncomfortable, as I felt that people were looking at me. I therefore feel more comfortable in glasses at my orchestra rehearsals, as I feel that this is how everyone is used to seeing me.

I have only two small worries, the opinion of my husband, who since I started wearing glasses before I met him, is used to seeing me in glasses, but just not full-time. I wore glasses a lot anyway, progressively more as the years have gone on, so in truth he probably hasn't noticed any real difference. Additionally I worry about the opinion of my parents, who view glasses as something which you only wear when strictly necessary, rather than simply for comfort, as in my case.

I think for me the difference is wearing my glasses full-time everyday rather than when I chose to wear them.

Thanks very much again.

Lou

NNVisitor 08 Aug 2017, 11:28

Lou

All glasses wearers have a self perception of how we think we look to others when we're wearing glasses. As one who was self conscious of wearing glasses from day one I often did not wear them. My vision got worse and worse. I adapted to blurred vision and mostly wore my glasses in school classrooms. At 15 years old I travelled to New York City alone by train to visit family relatives without my glasses. During my week long stay one day my cousins wife came up to me and talked about herself preferring to wear glasses. Of course she was indirectly referring to me as I must have shown signs of not seeing clearly.

Seven years later I visited several relatives out of town whom I had not seen for six or seven years including an aunt and cousin who were at the gathering in New York City. On this trip my glasses prescription was -8 astigmatism-1 both eyes. It was the first time any of these relatives would see me wearing glasses. I certainly was self conscious about them. My glasses tinted as that was in styly then and I thought it would hide how strong my glasses were. My glasses were thick to. It was before thinner lenses were available. Not one of my relatives said a word about me wearing glasses. It was quite a relief to me. Bottom line is sometimes we worry too much about our appearance especially with glasses on. To others seeing us it's really no big deal.

Lou 08 Aug 2017, 10:14

Sorry, the last post was from me. I forgot to input my ES Nickname.

08 Aug 2017, 10:05

Hi Soundmanpt

Thank you very much.

I am happy that no one has asked about why I'm wearing my glasses more now. You are probably right that they have noticed and have decided not to question me. If so, I am glad about that.

No, nothing was said at my family outing. I didn't wear my transitions (reactions), as the weather was overcast.

I do prefer wearing my glasses for two reasons. The first is that without I get horrible eyestrain. My eyes burn like a hot poker is being poked through them. My optician said that the reason for such severe eyestrain with such a small prescription, is that I am really visually sensitive and also really easy to test. Apparently however many times she switches between different lenses in the test room, I always choose the same lens for each eye. She said that I know which lens I like, and demonstrated by lifting up and putting down her own glasses, that by alternating between wearing and not wearing my own glasses, I am effectively doing the same as switching between a lens I like and one I don't. She also said that the results of her objective refraction agreed with my preferences, and that if I had been unable to communicate, she would have made the same choice for me.

The other issue I was having was intermittent inconsistent vision with my glasses later in the day. On days when I hadn't yet worn my glasses, if I put them on for the first time in the evening, sometimes they would seem too strong. My optician said that this was caused by me straining to see and my eye muscles not always fully relaxing when I put on my glasses.

Her advice was to wear my glasses full-time, and it has solved both the eye strain and intermittent inconsistent vision with my glasses later in the day. Since starting to wear my glasses full-time, I haven't had any eye strain and my vision with my glasses now seems the same whatever the time of day, and for this reason, I feel that I have made the right decision. I have also gained greater comfort and can see better at all distances, even if the difference is more along the lines of the difference between a SD and HD television picture.

Thanks again

Lou

Soundmanpt 07 Aug 2017, 19:56

Lou

You should be happy that no one has said anything about why you're wearing your glasses so much more now. My guess is that they probably have noticed but have decided not to question you. They might just assume that your eyesight has gotten a little worse so you're wearing your glasses more than you used to. So was anything said at your family outing about your wearing glasses? If you kept your transitions (reactions) on all day they may just think that you were wearing sunglasses. the main thing is how you feel about wearing your glasses. If you prefer wearing your glasses it really shouldn't matter if you really need them or not. You're not doing any harm to your eyes by wearing them full time and you seem more comfortable wearing your glasses than not having them on.

Lou 06 Aug 2017, 10:49

I thought that I'd post an update. I've been wearing my glasses full-time for around a month now, and no one has said anything. Since I always wore my glasses when at my orchestra rehearsals or when out with friends, I'm not surprised that they haven't noticed any difference, as there isn't one. I however thought that my parents and sister may have said something, as they are only used to seeing me wearing glasses when calling it on them on the way to and from orchestra rehearsals/gigs, but I have worn my glasses for a couple of small family visits and outings since I started wearing them full-time, and so far nobody has said anything.

It was my parents that I was most worried about. Both my mum and dad have glasses for reading, and later started wearing glasses for driving/tv, but neither of them wear them full-time. My dad has two pairs and my mum has bifocals, which she wears for knitting in front of the tv, reading and driving. Her distance prescription is stronger than my general purpose description, and I imagine that she since she wears a plus prescription for driving and stronger plus prescription for reading, that she would see better if she wore her bifocals full-time.

My parents, my dad in particular, and my mum probably from being influenced by him, are of the impression that glasses shouldn't be worn any more than necessary or they make your eyes worse. Probably with a prescription only for reading that blurs distance vision, they are right, as it probably leads to unnecessary de-conditioning of the ciliary muscles, if a too high reading prescription is worn, or a reading prescription is worn more and/or sooner than necessary, but I don't believe this to be applicable to my small general purpose prescription for astigmatism, which simply in my opinion sharpens my vision slightly and avoids eye strain.

Anyway, since my dad points out to my mum as they get ready to go out,that she has forgotten to remove her glasses, and mum commented on a previous occasion when she saw me wearing my glasses on a non orchestra day, I have been expecting them to say something, and am wondering whether a family outing tomorrow will be the day. Hopefully they won't, as I don't fancy an awkward conversation with my parents who still like to try to tell me what to do, even though I am 43. Since we will largely be outside for most of the day, I think that I will wear my reactions, which they may think I am wearing as sunglasses and not bothering to remove when I go indoors.

I did go and try lots of different frames on, but didn't find anything that I really liked more than the glasses I have already, so will stick as I am, until I find a little more subtle pair that I really like. I am quite happy with my current bold plastic frames, but fancy something a little more subtle for more dressy occasions along the lines of a semi-rimless pair I wish that I had kept hold of.

Best wishes

Lou

Lou 11 Jul 2017, 02:59

Hi Soundmanpt

Thank you very much for your reply, and words of support.

I wasn't particularly bothered about my optician suggesting that I wear my glasses full-time, as I was wearing them a lot anyway.

What seems different to me, is when I first put my glasses on. Previously I was waiting until I went out and drove, or did something in particular, so wouldn't wear my glasses at all on days I didn't leave the house, and on other days, I wasn't putting them on until the afternoon. Now I'm putting them on as a matter of routine when I get dressed in the morning.

Although no one outside my home would notice any difference, I am wondering slightly about my husband seeing me full-time in glasses, as he was used to me wearing glasses sometimes and not others at home. In all honestly, wearing glasses full-time himself, I don't think he really minds. He didn't react when I told him what the optician advised.

The other thing that slightly bothers me is my choice of glasses. I have three pairs with anti-reflection coating and one pair of reactions, owing to having had some older ones I liked re-glazed (which wasn't very expensive as my previous change in prescription was to only one eye, so I could have two pairs re-glazed for the price of one), and although I feel that these suit me and I spent quite sometime choosing them, because I never planned to wear them full-time, I limited my budget more than I would now. Maybe if I had paid more, I wouldn't have found anything I liked better. This is probably purely psychological, hence my choice of thread.

Thanks very much again.

Lou

Soundmanpt 10 Jul 2017, 10:42

Lou

Your glasses history really is much like many others. You're certainly not the first one to procrastinate getting their first glasses and you won't be the last. And since you weren't used to seeing yourself in glasses you didn't think that you looked good in any of them. Again very normal. But slowly, you like others, found glasses that suited you. For convenience sake even though you only needed your glasses for distance you started keeping your glasses on even when you didn't need them. So of course your eyes were going to become more and more used to them. So even though you wear your glasses what most would consider as full time it seemed to bother you when at your eye appointment your optician advised you to wear your glasses full time. But the truth is even if you weren't told that you were still going to be wearing your glasses full time anyway. You just didn't like the fact that you were being told to wear them. I do get where you're coming from but try not to let it bother you since nothing has really changed including your prescription which didn't change.

Lou 09 Jul 2017, 02:32

Hopefully this is the best thread for this post.

I've been wearing glasses with a small prescription since the beginning of 2010, after finally having the confidence to visit an optician after years of vision difficulties.

At first I didn't think that glasses would suit me and couldn't find any I liked but once I had found styles that suited me, I didn't mind wearing glasses and now have a few pairs I really like and feel comfortable in.

For the last few years, I've worn distance prescription glasses for basically doing things, driving, music (I'm an orchestral musician), computer, reading, but since I can see better with them on at all distances, I haven't bothered taking them off in between. For example, I've never seen the point of wearing my glasses to drive to my orchestra rehearsals, taking them off to walk across the car park, putting them on again to read the music, taking them off for coffee/lunch breaks, when I can see better if I leave them on. Once I put my glasses on, I tended to leave them on for the rest of the day.

I also used to wear my glasses for lunch with friends, as I'd get eye strain and feel that I was staring at them to focus as we sat and chatted. Ditto for meetings I attend.

I'd say therefore that if you asked my colleagues and friends they would say that I had worn my glasses full-time for years, as they never see me without glasses.

However it was only at my last eye appointment, at which although my prescription has not changed, my optician suggested wearing my glasses full-time owing to the eye strain I was getting when I wasn't wearing them.

Although out of the house nobody has noticed anything different, and I wore my glasses a fair amount in the house also, my family are not used to seeing me wear glasses all day everyday at home, and this is making me feel a little uncomfortable.

Nobody has said anything or seemed to notice anything, probably because I wore my glasses two thirds of the time anyhow, it just feels different to me.

02 Jul 2017, 02:55

* Imagine diagnosing a major VISION PROBLEM from reading some entries on an internet discussion board. Done so by an anonymous observer whose only seen tidbits of someones experiences and feelings. *

I don't think the anonymous poster said he is schizto, he/she said should seek mental help. i can see why. complete personality change is definitely not something handled by rank amatuers. it is not public speaking trauma.

This is a very biased group here. they want to see everyone wear glasses so the answer will always be wear glasses, glasses, and make sure you wear glasses. aAll the time. All day. Everywhere. doctor advice should be mountains and rivers better than groupie obsessed i know everythings on a sex fantasy glasses webisight.

on the other hand everyone here will always I have no problem with the issues raised. It seems like this has become a stalker board now. People here are sneaking around all the social websights, porn cam websights, spending all day typing internety searches to find glasses, making up fake names and stories. omg people who want to make eyes blurry weith surgery and such and such and such. It sounds very desperiate and depraved.

i think if you are posting more than 10,000 characters a week inclduing links, something is wrong with your real life you are avoiding comeing here. think about.

Maxim 01 Jul 2017, 15:40

Dear anonymous,

I have carefully read your statement.

I am convinced, you have written it in good intention.

But, however, I am convinced, that our friend Mel does not suffer from schizophrenia. His problem is not as complex as schizophrenia would be.

Hestating to wear glasses in public is in my opinion the same inner barrier, like a four year old child feels, when he has been singing a favorite song a hundred times in the family, and now the proud Daddy asks him or her to do the singing in front of a 100+ persons wedding party. He or she will be shy, and probably, he or she can't sing tihere.

Some weeks ago, I have been describing my behaviour - in certain circles (university teaching assignment) I was not ready to wear the glasses needed, and for many years, I had been wearing contacts, with suboptimal vision results.

Wearing glasses was not as 'fashionable' as it seems to be today, was it the female students whom I wished to impress as a 'strong man not dependent on glasses, with "perfect vision"? I don't know the answer.

I feel, these approaches are just natural.

NNVisitor 01 Jul 2017, 10:04

Imagine diagnosing a major mental illness from reading some entries on an internet discussion board. Done so by an anonymous observer whose only seen tidbits of someones experiences and feelings.

Yes some people get anxious about being in certain situations. Such as speaking before a large audiance. Being seen in public wearing their glasses by people who have never seen them wearing them before. No these are not signs of a major mental illness. Many people wear contact lenses for the above stated reason and probably so because they have been judged negatively or believe they will be.

As for pictures and videos uploaded on the internet. Don't publicly post any pictures or videos that you want to keep private. Once uploaded, even on Snapchat, they are no longer private.

01 Jul 2017, 01:31

Mel you should seek professional mental health assistance. it seems you may have borderline schizophrenia. also a very unhealthy obsession.

don't worry. you are not alone. the same can be said for many people on this web page. as long as it is safe and secure, it is good.

but sometimes they do things that could get them into deep trouble if they were caught. some people here have posted borderline pedophiliac pictures of little girls in glasses to satisfy their sexual obsession. also there is the stealing of videos/pictures from women's instagram/facebook/twitter without their personal permission and reposting here strictly for their sexual fetish gratification.

people who are not in the optometric field should not be giving advice/buying glasses for others here. your eyes are very precious and their care should not be entrusted to a group of sexually deviant individuals regardless of their knowledge base.

i say this anonymously because this can be a very venomous population with an almost religious like obsession. but i've often thought eye site should have a special link for people in need of serious professional mental health attention.

it might be something good to consider.

Lentifan 30 Jun 2017, 14:00

Mel

I can only speak from my own experience. I am much older than you and I was aware of my fetish much younger than you appear to have been. Looking back, I would have loved to have the opportunity to wear glasses with a prescription of -7.75. I did not realise I needed glasses until I was around 40 years of age, when I suddenly realised I was short-sighted. I got glasses which I at first wore only outside for a few years. Then I found I could not read and watch TV at the same time. Presbyopia had set in and I got progressives, which I then started to wear indoors and out. I became much happier.

Don't misunderstand me. I still ogle girls with strong glasses; I still wish my partner (and I) were much more myopic; I still have the disease. But I feel much more content that I am now seen as a person who wears glasses and I like my appearance in glasses. I now also wear hearing aids, but that' another story.

My advice, for what it's worth, is just bite the bullet and wear your glasses in public. After a day or two it will be no big deal. If you need an excuse, you can say your contacts are bothering you and you have to switch to glasses. If it makes it easier, you can get hi-index lenses for your 'coming out' glasses and then change to CR 39 which will give you much more satisfyingly thick lense, especially with rimless or semi-rimless frames. You will feel much more content. The OO condition will not go away, but you will no longer feel a fraud for not practicing your beliefs - an OO who's afraid to wear glasses. Just do it. You won't regret it.

30calcat 30 Jun 2017, 07:21

Mel,

Sometimes I wonder if we become victims of our own optical obsession. Your fear that your self image will be completely transformed if you start wearing glasses becomes highly magnified because of your obsession. If glasses, in general, are a big deal to you, than any personal change to wearing glasses is going to naturally be a big deal.

If you let fear dominate your obsession, then you may be heading down the road of relative isolation, in a closet, about something that is important to you. It is apparently important enough that you are willing to discuss it at length with the community here. Do you have a girlfriend? A secret obsession can be damaging to a long term relationship.

It is probably in your best interest to get past the fear and channel your obsession towards positive interactions with those around you. Posting in this community is a start, but as you have seen this place is a free for all. Do you want a girlfriend who wears glasses? How will you ever express to her that you like the way she looks in glasses, when you won't even wear glasses yourself? I would be wondering if your words are sincere.

Tactically, I suggest that you get together the motivation to confront your immediate fear of wearing glasses, recognizing that you are making it to be a much bigger deal than it really is. Practice good responses to what you think will be awkward interactions. "Why didn't you wear glasses before?" "I have always worn contacts, but I got a new pair of glasses that I like wearing better." And if it turns out that there are people who see you in a more negative light, that is their loss. You are still the same person, and if they can't be a friend to you just because you prefer glasses instead of contacts, maybe that is good riddance. On the other hand, you may be the small motivation that a friend needs to feel comfortable wearing glasses, because you are showing that it is cool.

NNVisitor 29 Jun 2017, 19:03

Mel

It's hard to significantly change our personality. An introverted person can become less introverted but will always be an introvert. Our self image is highly influenced by our unconscious which is affected by our life experiences. I can understand how you feel about wearing your glasses in public. I've certainly been self conscious about doing so however I really havn't experienced more than some infrequent insults or rude comments about my glasses or my vision. I've come to realize that to most others it's no issue. Lots of people wear glasses even strong ones. I really feel that most people we interact with won't like us any less because we wear glasses.

Mel 29 Jun 2017, 15:21

Warning before I start: this will be a very long rant for selfish purposes. I decided to post in this little-used thread so that those who want to read it can do so, without hijacking the main threads.

I'm a lurker and I've posted a few times about my glasses/various other topics, but this will be a post of a different kind. I have several major frustrations about my obsession with glasses, so I'd like to share my story and I would appreciate any feedback/help. In some regards, I am just at wit's end.

I'm a male college student in the U.S., in my early twenties (I will keep details deliberately vague for privacy; my name is not Mel or anything similar). In most regards, I am what you would consider fairly normal: I get good grades, I have nice friends, I have several extracurricular activities I've pursued throughout my life (and I've become fairly good at one of them); overall, I consider myself a happy person and I look forward to the future.

Now, onto the meat: like many here, I don't know how, when, or where my optical obsession began. What I do know is that I discovered that I was getting increasingly nearsighted around 10 years old, and about 1.5 years or so thereafter got my first pair of glasses, the prescription was about -2.

Now, onto the embarrassing/weird part: I still didn't realize my optical obsession when I first got glasses (I was still very young), but I categorically refused to wear my glasses. I cannot rationally explain it, but I just couldn't bring myself to wear them; I would look at myself in the mirror and cringe with disgust. Now, in all other aspects I'm not particularly vain; sure, I care about my appearance, but with glasses it was like some sort of disease. Every time my parents made me put my glasses on, I turned into a shadow of myself: I would become rude and incredibly shy and would take every opportunity to take my glasses off.

This continued up until I got contacts, at 15, when my prescription was already -4.25. As you can guess, I wore my contacts constantly, and my prescription continued rising. Sometime around 17, I discovered that I was an OO (again, I can't pinpoint the day it happened: I think it was a gradual realization) and I was extremely attracted to ladies in glasses (strictly minus). Yet, the weird part: despite my obsession, I STILL was incredibly shy about wearing glasses, and would essentially only wear them at home when no one was looking (not even my parents).

Jump to the present day: my prescription is now at -6.75 with about -.75 of astigmatism, and my latest glasses, which I posted about in the Lenses forum, are Semi-rimless (here is the updated photo I posted there: https://postimg.org/image/u11mjsr53/).

Like many here, I'm obsessed with thick minus glasses, and I thought that a nice, thick semi-rimless pair would turn me on and help me get rid of my fear of wearing glasses (funnily enough, I posted in Lenses for "confirmation" that my glasses indeed look thick, but it doesn't seem like too many eyesceners are impressed :) Unfortunately, it hasn't really happened: I still wear my contacts almost all the time and feel very, very self-conscious with glasses on. Very few of my friends even know I wear glasses (in college, I'd only wear them in my room; I would always wear contacts, even when I would go late into the night), and now my fear has been compounded by a scenario I keep visualizing: I suddenly appear in thick glasses, and I can't help but fear that those around me will be put off (they'll ask me why I didn't wear glasses before, they might see me in a different light, i.e. as a big nerd, etc.).

Anyway, my eyesight has gotten a lot worse over the past year and I anticipate my prescription rising to -7.75 or so; I'm tempted to order a semi-rimless pair from Zenni (similar to what I have now) in standard index, they should be a centimeter thick or so.

If you've managed to wade through this rant, I would appreciate any and all sound advice regarding my situation. Any kind of psychoanalysis, helping me understand my fear, advice, etc. would be much appreciated. Ideally, I would switch to glasses around 75% of the time, and wear contacts for sports, special events, etc., but right now I just cannot see that happening.

TL;DR: OO but cannot bring myself to wear glasses.

Maxim 11 Jun 2017, 15:50

SORRY -

the last contribution should read "to Dany",

I'm the sender.

I'm too tired after a long day, and so I confused things here.

Dani 11 Jun 2017, 15:46

For me, it took more than thirty years to accept wearing glasses.

On one side, I always was eager to wear glasses. At the university, I wore glasses, when I did not need them (tried to induce myopia). At 26 or 27, it turned out, that I had worn approx. minus 2.00 for years, but I really needed + 2.50 (I was hyperop = farsighted, not myop = nearsighted). I only wore glasses in the office (I could not work without), but I had a teaching assignment at the university, and there I did not wear glasses - I took contact lenses in the so called monovision approach. That is one eye corrected for near vision, and one eye for distance vision. In my case, it was Right eye + 2.50, left eye (near) +4.50.

I did this between 27 and 61 years approx. Then I changed my exployer, and from one day to the other I completely changed to a fulltime glasses wearer. The main reason was, that I suffered more from certain problems with the contact lenses (dry eyes together with car climatization), and that the right eye had developed an astigmatism of 2.00 diopters. The prescription was + 4.75/-2.00 cyl now.

The interesting thing is, that I, deep in my mind, was eager to glasses weaaring. When travelling to region, where nobody knows me (quite often on business travel - say once a month), I wore strong plus contact lenses (+8.00) and corresponding to my hyperopia, minus glasses at approx. -5.00 / -2.50 monovision for one eye distance, one eye near vision.

That's my glasses wearing history.

I have been a fulltime wearer now for approx. ten years, and I love it to wear glasses now - bifocals or varifocals, and sometimes gambling with GOC.

antonio 11 Jun 2017, 12:21

discuss it with us on https://lenschat.com

dani,

best regards, antonio

Crystal Weil 11 Jun 2017, 11:19

Soundmanpt 11 Jun 2017, 06:59

Dani

You pose an interesting question. A question that has no one answer. How have you felt about seeing others wearing glasses. I mean when you see another woman wearing glasses do you usually think they look really cute wearing glasses or think they would look better without glasses? Did you ever wish that you needed glasses? A lot of how you feel about wearing glasses now is based on what you have thought of wearing glasses in the past would be like. Also are these glasses your first glasses as well? That makes a big difference as well. Because if these are your first glasses it is understandable that it might take a bit longer for you to get used to how you see yourself wearing glasses. Also you need to remember even without knowing your age you have only been wearing your glasses full time for about a month but you for all those past years you have been looking at yourself in the mirror without glasses on your face. So you just haven't fully accepted the fact that you're wearing glasses now, but I think slowly as you get more comfortable wearing your glasses you will start to accept how you look wearing glasses. I'm sure you don't look in the mirror and find yourself any less attractive but just different than before you started wearing glasses. The taking your glasses off for pictures will also slowly stop happening once you realize that any pictures of you without your glasses on isn't really your everyday look anymore.

Dani 11 Jun 2017, 02:25

How long does it take for you to get used to seeing yourself in glasses? I've been wearing them full-time for a month and yet, I can't accept the bespectacled girl staring back at me in the mirror is me. She still looks like a stranger. Plus, I always take off my glasses for photos. When does the mental image of yourself get superseded by the one of yourself wearing glasses? How long did it take others on this forum?

guest 25 Feb 2015, 05:41

Hi Ellen

Haven't heard from you all on email....

Lenschat princess?Are you coming over?

Ellen 25 Feb 2015, 04:21

Confused,

That's a strange question to ask but I suppose understandable given your experiences. I do concur with Melyssa though. Both my partner and I are very highly myopic and neither of us has ever been diagnosed with depression. Maybe you're just attracted to the type of girl who exhibits traits commensurate with bipolar or other types of depression such as BPD?

Ellen

24 Feb 2015, 21:13

Jerk yourself fuckhead...

It was a joke.

24 Feb 2015, 19:19

Coach...jerk!

24 Feb 2015, 18:49

What is the cheerleaders "couch?

Soundmanpt 24 Feb 2015, 17:57

Sadly back when I was in school not only were the teachers boring but they were usually pretty old and far from good looking. Now the teachers often are hard to tell from the students. I know several very attractive teachers and they all either wear contacts or glasses.

Last year one them even ordered glasses from me. She totally surprised me when I met her because she was working as a server in a sports bar meaning she had to wear an outfit much like what Hooter girls wear. When she told me that she was not only a teacher but she taught high school history and was also the cheerleaders couch. No doubt that meant she was probably a cheerleader when she was in high school as well. She got married later that summer and never returned to her server job.

Melyssa 24 Feb 2015, 13:41

Confused: It's bad dates. I know a man who is married to a woman with a -9.00 prescription, and he tells me that she has inner beauty to match her outer beauty, and that being married to her is the greatest thing he's ever done. By some coincidence, that woman who wears close to 50 pairs of glasses spells her name the same as you see in front of the date and time of this post. :)

Melyssa 24 Feb 2015, 13:37

Likelenses: I was not that teacher. But had I been one, I would have worn three pairs of glasses a day, matching the color of the frames with the color of my dress. Of course, had I married someone in the optical field instead of a CPA, I would have had 100 pairs of glasses instead of close to 50. :)

Likelenses 22 Feb 2015, 21:20

When I was in the seventh,or eight grade in school,I had a teacher that was very pretty,and had most likely only been a year or so out of college.All of us young boys were in love with her.

The best part as far as I was concerned,was that she wore really strong minus glasses.

I don't recall if she announced it to the class,or if we found out some other way,but we learned that she had become engaged to a local optometrist.

Shorty thereafter she showed up in a different pair of glasses every few days. If my memory serves me correctly,it seems like she must have had thirty pairs of glasses that school year.

Later she married the optometrist,and disappeared from teaching.

Now fast forward to the present.For the past four or five years I have casually known a late fifties married couple.

He wears minus glasses of minus 3.50,or 4.00 in a rather generic frame,but she on the other hand must own twenty pairs.

She is tall ,thin,and very attractive,with a sexy self confidence,and her Rx must be minus 15,or so. Most of her frames have been expensive, small,to medium rectangular,and some of her lenses are most likely CR-39,as they are much chunkier than some of her others.

Last week she was sporting a pair of expensive looking wayfareer type frames,with disappointing high index lenses,but due to her age they may be a first pair of progressives.

On several occasions I have wanted to compliment her on her eye wear,but have not as her husband seems to hover around her kind of protectively,and they both know that I am a single guy.She is more outgoing,and verbally friendly than he.

I am pretty sure that he is OO,and he may suspect that I am also because he has probably noticed me checking out his wifes eye ware.

Soundmanpt 22 Feb 2015, 18:46

Crystal Veil

I'm sure you're right about at least a fair number of opticians having more than just the "it's a job" interest in glasses. For many years now, actually more than 40 in fact I have been in a non profit vision group that works to help those that are on low incomes and can't afford to get eye exams and glasses. At one time I was picking up donated glasses from about 35 optical stores, I have slowed down and now only collect from 22 locations near my home. In my early days of doing this I ofter came across really old gold semi-rimless glasses that were nothing more than 2 temples and a bridge piece screwed right into the glasses lenses. I couldn't help but notice the great detail work on the temples and once in a conversation with an older optometrist he told that not only was the frame real gold but the etching on the very thin temples was done by hand. These glasses were really pieces of art. Anyway I at first always just turned them because I was happy that someone in need was going to be getting them. One day I was chatting with someone higher up than I was and I commented about the gold glasses and how someone was getting a real treasure. He laughed and said that they never use those glasses and they only melted them down for the gold content and in many cases it wasn't very much because this was before gold became so expensive. I was shocked that these beautiful glasses were being destroyed so from then on I made a point to pull them out before they could be turned into scrap. After a while I had quite a few of them. A few years passed and I still had them and I well recall telling a young optician at a high end optical store about all of these glasses and how beautiful they were. She asked to see some of them. So the next time I was there making my pickup I remembered to bring in a nice selection of some of the nicer ones. She was truly excited to see these glasses because she had only seen glasses like these in pictures. She went through them all and tried many of them on after figuring out how to put on glasses with cable temples. She loved them so I told her she could have one if she wanted. You would have thought I was giving her a car or something. She went through and decided she liked a certain pair more than the others. She said she was going to have clear lenses made for them so she could wear them. But she admitted that the pair she picked out the lenses weren't all that strong. I made pickups about every 3 weeks and on my next pickup to her store she was in fact wearing my gifted glasses. I told her that she looked really nice wearing them. I asked her if her lab had any problem with drilling new lenses for her and she said she had decided that they really weren't that strong and she could see fine wearing them. She said she loved wearing nice fluffy sweaters and she thought wearing glasses would complete the look. After that I found even more that wanted those antique glasses. One girl made a display with them by taking an old book and opening it to around the center and placing the glasses opened in the middle of the pages. Another put them on a doll she had. Another optician that wanted to wear them with her prescription ruined tons of lens blanks trying to put notches where the temples had to slide over the lens. The problem was this was way before high index lenses and she had a rather strong prescription so she was trying to notch them by hand and it took many tries before she got them made. Sadly to be honest they really didn't look all that good with such think lenses. it wasn't long until I only was left with a few. I kept one pair that was made in 1943 and it is in mint condition. The really odd thing is that the rx is only +.25 in both lenses. I have a few more but they aren't nearly as nice.

Also you might be surprised at how many opticians enjoy over correcting themself. Back then I didn't know nearly as much about optics as I do now. One optician I now realize was without a doubt inducing myopia, other opticians called her a plastic addict because they knew she was always increasing her prescription over what she was prescribed by her doctor. I think that was the biggest benefit she got from being an optician because she could order her glasses in any prescription she wanted.

Soundmanpt 22 Feb 2015, 17:59

Revolver and astigmaphil

First off I am straight. If you had asked me my opinion of gays and lesbians 5 or 6 years ago you would have gotten a far different response from me. I think for some reason I had the idea that they were somehow so different that I could have easily spotted a gay person miles away. But it only took a young lesbian woman to change my feelings. She was and is very much out there, but she is she is also one one of the sweetest young ladies you could ever meet. She is a bartender and the patron's are all on the younger side and mostly male. Everyone that sits at her bar loves her and would not hesitate to come to her defense if she ever needed it. That was what changed my views. by the way she is very attractive and so is her mate.

confused. 22 Feb 2015, 12:49

I know this may sound crazy but has there even been a study done or any type of link found between people with high myopia and bipolar/depression? I only ask because my ex wife ( she ran off to battle her demons and attempt suicide 3 times and I took her back until I had enough) she was a minus 7.5. I dated another girl briefly and she could wig out at a minutes notice. Minus 6. another girl I dated basically the same thing minus 6.5 and my last encounter when the phone rang I never know if i had dr jekyl or mr hyde. All these girls confessed to me as having been diagnosed with ADHD/ Bipolar/ Manic depressive. I have a huge thing for high minus girls but have yet to find a sane one. is there a connection or just a string of bad dates for me? The weird thing was they all were pretty cool with my glassesfetish, hit me here or maybe an email. vaclassiccars@yahoo.com

22 Sep 2014, 10:37

There are several women I know that I can talk about my interest in glasses with as well as one male friend who also wears glasses. We can talk about gwg or just wearing glasses, but other people I know have no interest and I know not to bring it up.

Crystal Veil 22 Sep 2014, 10:33

I would not be surprised if a minority within the vast group of opticians around the globe share our fascination with people in glasses without "coming out". Over the years, only one employee confessed to me that he had a glasses collection himself and that he sometimes took a pair of glasses from the boxes for the Third World in the shop. He probably felt safe to mention this to me.

Millhouse 22 Sep 2014, 04:40

- astigmaphile,

Only once have I ever mentioned my gwg interest to a female wearer I was keen on- to my cost - she totally freaked out over my admission and we never met again. So here (eyescene) is for time being my only accepted online retreat , not forgetting Crystal veil too of course and the thoughts, musings and comments of our other like minded global posters.

astigmaphile 21 Sep 2014, 10:37

I think that there is much more acceptance of the LGBT community that for unusual interests. Quite a few of my friens know of my obsession with ophthalmic optics and don't seem to be upset with it. In places where I think that it would cause trouble, I keep my mouth shut.

What I really hope , is that I never get coaght trying to figure out someone's spectacle correction. It is a favorite hobby. I have done it since grade school and I am now 68 years old.

Revolver 21 Sep 2014, 10:14

Carrie made an interesting comment on the Sightings thread to the effect that being gay has much more acceptance than having a fetish. That has long been my thought and wonder how others feel. Homosexuality by both genders seems to have almost universal acceptance, that's not to say that straights necessarily like it and sure don't want to engage in it but do accept it.

Would like to hear what others think, and in particular, ask the gays and lesbians if because of their sexual preferences they are more accepting of fetishes than straights.

Soundmanpt 13 Sep 2014, 10:32

continued

The web site is "zennioptical.com" You should be able to get your husband's glasses with the thinnest lenses and the AR coating (anti-reflective) for between $55.00 and $75.00. For your daughter as long as she is less than say -5.00 her glasses should be less than $25.00 and the same for your son.

If you were to decide to get glasses fro your self and you don't want fake ones you can order a pair with -.50 lenses which will actually just give you slightly better than 20/20 vision. This is is what your optometrist would prescribe you if you were to claim that you were having some problems with seeing clearly after dark while driving. just be sure to also get the $5.00 option of the AR coating which you would like because there wouldn't be any glare on your glasses which help make them very comfortable to wear.

Hope all this helped in some ways.

Soundmanpt 13 Sep 2014, 10:23

Mystery wife

No wonder you couldn't see much with your husband's glasses. His prescription is considered in the strong range by quite a bit. Anything over -7.00 is what they consider to be "strong"

Your intentions were good but it is very hard to order glasses for someone as a surprise. But I can give you some pointers that should help if you ever order glasses fro him, your daughter, son or yourself. Measure a pair of their glasses that fit them well across the face portion from the outside left to the outside right in millimeters. Then when your looking on line most of them will give an "overall width" just compare as close as possible and they should be a good fit. Also with such a strong prescription like that of your husband you should get the lens option of "high index" 1.67 option. With Zenni this option is an extra $35.00 but should make them much thinner. Also you didn't say how were able to get his rx for the glasses you ordered, but I hope you didn't use the rx off his contact lens packets. If you did his glasses are a little bit weaker than they should be. Because his contacts sit directly on his eyes and glasses sit about 3/4" away from his eyes his glasses need to be slightly stronger than his contacts. My guess is his glasses should be somewhere around -14.50.

Ordering glasses on line is completely safe if you go to places like Eyebuy Direct and Zenni Personally i really prefer Zenni and have used them for well over 10 years.

13 Sep 2014, 08:50

My husband wears glasses but never to work or outside the house. He is very self conscious about them and hates wearing them. I've tried them on and it is quite a debilitating feeling. I can't see anything except for a big blur and can't walk 4 feet without almost falling down. He has told me besides the look of them he can't stand the lack of sight outside the glasses. His contact box says -13.75. Not sure how bad that is but by judging his glasses I would say it is pretty bad.

I used his prescription and bought him glasses online as a surprise a couple of years ago and didn't realize how much goes into selecting them. They came in and we laughed when he opened them up. They filed the edges flat and they looked very different from his pair. Thinner but there are circles inside the lenses and his skin reflects on the corners. He just started wearing them about 6 months ago when his other pair got an eggshell crack when he basically tossed them down after putting in his contacts one morning. I keep telling him to get another pair but he always opts for contacts because of insurance. Don't think it matters I think he only wears them 30 minutes a day. I'm not an optometrist but I know that's not good.

Our daughter seems to inherited his vision. She got glasses at 4 and has 6 month check ups and every time there has been an increase. She's now 7 and we are both a little worried. But she takes it well and it doesn't phase her a bit. She looks so cute in them and she wears them proudly from sun up to sun down. Although she needs to do a better job of cleaning them sometimes. Smudge city. We keep hoping for the appointment that says no change but it hasn't happened yet. Children are expensive and our insurance only covers 1 pair a year. I've considered online but not ready to trust overseas manufactures just yet.

Our son seems to inherited most of my 20/20 vision. He wears glasses to school to see the board but the doctor told me it is very mild and doesn't have to wear them all the time. He is 10 now so he is almost in the clear.

Anyway I didn't marry him for his vision. I knew he wore contacts when when we first met but hadn't seen him in glasses until we were dating about a year. I was a little surprised how thick they were and how small his eyes were. But by that time it really didn't matter. I adored him and thought he handsome with or without. I don't think it would of mattered if he was wearing them. The first couple of weeks our personalities gelled right away.

Sometimes I wish I wore glasses so I wouldn't be the oddball in our family. Not really, maybe just a very weak pair. My husband jokes putting my eyesight into the gene pool was a good thing for generations to come. I've heard him apologize to my daughter and I don't like it much. He shouldn't feel guilty just because his family had inherent bad eyesight. Hence why I came here under the psychology title to help understand it. Didn't see much but just thought I would share.

Soundmanpt 13 Sep 2014, 07:58

Tim H

She clearly likes you so without being too pushy you maybe able to slowly convince her to wear her glasses on other dates where it's just you and her. this will get her more comfortable about wearing her glasses. I'm sure she is not used to wearing her glasses out in public much if ever. She may feel less attractive wearing glasses and for her this was probably like the first day she got glasses and had to wear them for for that first time. You just need to keep reassuring her that she is just as beautiful with her glasses on as she is without them. Just be don't ever tell her that she looks better with glasses than without.

12 Sep 2014, 20:03

It's to bad she doesn't wear her glasses more often so she wouldn't be as self conscious when she is forced to wear them. Since she wears contact lenses all the time, it probably is like wearing glasses for the first time every time she wears them in public. A friend of mines wife is -9.75 and -9.50 and usually wears contacts, but at least once a week she wears her glasses to work so everyone sees her in them and she doesn't feel weird or self conscious when she has to wear them. I've gone out with them when she has worn her glasses out in public and nobody looks at her any differently than they do to anyone else wearing glasses, it's to bad your gf doesn't realize it. Maybe with your help she will.

Tim H 12 Sep 2014, 11:48

I've just started dating a girl with a very strong prescription who wears contacts (-8.75) all the time. She showed me her glasses the fourth time I stayed the night at her place and they were stunning (and very strong). She was having some irritation with her contact one night when we met friends at a bar so I urged her to wear her glasses, which she surprisingly agreed to! She's usually really social and bubbly and talks to everyone. But this night she was so shy and reserved. One of my friends complemented her on them and she said a quiet thanks and looked down. She was so shy the entire night. I could tell she was self conscious about her appearance in them. She even kept pulling her hair forward as if to cover the sides. It's sad because she looked beautiful, they highlighted her face and her eyes.

agilpro 09 Sep 2014, 09:05

bensmith

The myopic girl was probably 21 or 22 at the time and "wore" glasses that were very thick well over 1/2" thick and I was told by her boyfriend that she was in his words "severely nearsighted" and was embarrassed to be seen in her glasses and used them only when she absolutely had to. I met her while she was visiting my aunts vacation home on the water and the only time in the three days she was seen in her glasses was when we picked her up in the boat. As soon as we got on dry land she took them off and did not put them on again until she left. She was basically blind without them and would feel hand over hand to go anywhere if she was not with her bf. She also had no self esteem and you would have to drag anything out of her and it would come mostly in yes or no answers. Where we were it was dangerous to be going around without her glasses, especially at night: she had to navigate up and down 126 concrete stairs to get from the main house to the boathouse where she was staying and several times she fell or knocked things over. The sad part was she was good looking and didn't look to bad in her glasses.

Millhouse 09 Sep 2014, 05:05

- Bensmith

Your prescription is a little below mine (-7./-6.5)

I use high index lenses , about 1.6 as I seem to recall. Even so the edges come out quite thick on my current frames which are semi-rimless.

Your thoughts on low confidence being a wearer are nothing to worry about, I have found over the years (I'm 51 now) that women (or men for that matter) will be drawn to you by your inner confidence and glasses .

I believe that in past relationships I've had my gf's had a history of dating men in glasses, for example previous bf's or husbands had worn them, ( I got shown photos etc) or that they liked the clark Kent thing- whatever. My point is this; many women are very attracted to men in glasses, they will let you know one way or another, sometimes in subtle ways, anything anyone else tells you or advises you otherwise is not worth a jot. I months years trying to get used to contact lenses so I could go to a night club and get laid, or be a pick up guy on a night out. I know now what works for me, just be confident, friendly, and enjoy yourself. If you have a gf or wife then that's great but try not to waste emotional energy on negative thoughts about your appearance. I sure as hell don't.

I'm a guy who seeks out gwgs myself- so it seems obvious to me that women also seek out guys too- keep your eyes open when out and about and you'll see what I mean, they will keep training their eyes on you, peaking back and forth. You'll see. That's the trick that works for me- go up , chat, smile. Engage in conversation.

Peace to all. Long live GWG's O^O

Bensmith 09 Sep 2014, 01:54

Other people's thick glasses only cause positive feelings in me but I have to admit I'm self-conscious about my own prescription (around -6). My current frames looked really nice at the optician's but the minifying lenses change the look. My eyes look so small through them it's almost as if the frames were different. And the lenses are as thin as possible.

agilpro, could you tell us a little more about the myopic girl who wouldn't wear glasses? Sounds interesting.

agilpro 08 Sep 2014, 01:20

I think it's a matter of confidence you exhibit when wearing glasses and it doesn't make a huge difference whether they are thick or thin. If you are self conscious about your glasses it will show in your personality and give the impression that you aren't available or unapproachable. I have known people who were in the very high myopia range who carried themselves with confidence and you really didn't notice their glasses after the first meeting. I have also known people who just by their actions, you knew they were self conscious about their glasses and were very difficult to get to know and you kind of leave them standing there after awhile because you know they are to uncomfortable with talking to you. I met one highly myopic girl who would not wear her glasses and was in effect blind and because she could not see isolated herself by keeping herself in a corner or away from everyone else and was almost impossible to talk to. If you can act in a confident and assured manner, people will see beyond the glasses.

Eyestein 12 Aug 2014, 04:47

It's certainly got something to do with psychology. I can't figure out how people can be so rude even if they are under the influence of alcohol.

Carrie 11 Aug 2014, 19:03

Not sure if this is the best section to put this in but it seemed more right (?) than the other sections.

I was having a quiet drink with my girlfriend in a pub on Saturday - just the 2 of us in a corner away from the other people. After a short while 2 "lads" came over. They'd clearly had several drinks and saw 2 young women and thought they'd try their luck. We try to make it obvious we didn't want their company but they kept pestering us. I turned to one of them to politely ask him to leave us in peace. He said "Can I try your glasses on?" Before I could say "no" he had grabbed them off my face and put them on. That really pisses me off when someone does that. If a friend asks me and waits for an answer I will happily let them try my glasses on. He said "F*** me you're blind!" Gemma could see I was getting annoyed especially as the lad was in no hurry to give my glasses back. Then his mate thought he'd join in and tried to take Gemma's glasses off her face - he didn't get them but he did get a hard slap on his face from Gemma. The lad that took my glasses thought it was hilarious even though his mate was now far from happy. This distracted him enough for me to get my glasses back. I was getting quite angry by then. The lads detected this but just laughed. I then just flipped and shouted at them "Why don't you f*** right off?!" They still didn't get the message they weren't welcome and the 1st lad tried to get my glasses again! A member of the pub staff noticed we were getting hassled and politely but firmly asked the lads to leave us alone. He said to them "How would you like it if someone kept pestering you if you were having a quiet drink with a girlfriend?" I could see on their faces that they now realised we were a couple but instead of apologising the first one just said "F***ing 4-eyed lezzies!" so I replied with "Correct!" They left us and we carried on as we were before we were so rudely interrupted.

guest 25 Apr 2014, 08:43

Sooo Ellen,

Just be yourself ! You have your act together. Did you read the HB post I referred to earlier. Would love to have lunch when you are here with sis.

What do you do?

Melyssa 23 Apr 2014, 07:30

Ellen,

(1) I will be 58 next week and my eye doctor is checking every year to make sure my potential cataracts don't become problematic. I do have floaters here and there. The cataracts could be a result of medicine I've been taking for a lot of many years.

(2) I reckon I'm in the minority, because I have always felt so much more attractive in glasses, even with the thick lenses.

Ellen 23 Apr 2014, 06:56

guest, I'm not yet 38, I don't intend getting cataracts any time soon. If and when I do get cataracts, I will need my lenses removing and then it will maybe be time to get the right correction inserted in the form of IOLs. In the meantime I just couldn't bring myself to have my perfectly good lenses removed.

And. I'm quite confident generally anyway, I don't have a confidence issue talking to men or women. My point was that I just don't feel at my best while wearing -20 dioptre chunks of plastic in front of my eyes. I feel much more attractive without glasses. I'm guessing the majority of women would feel the same.

And 22 Apr 2014, 03:58

Ellen, is dating wearing glasses simply a confidence thing ? When you were younger and dating for the first time did you wear glasses full time ? Meeting someone new can be daunting but I'm sure most of us males dont just 'judge' on a pair of glasses - personality, hair, body shape, clothes, voice, piercings. tattoos, blimey the list goes on. Be yourself. If you think a fella should see your eyes without lenses take off your glasses and give them a clean whilst still looking at him. My gf hid the fact that she was pretting blind for ages by wearing contacts all the time but she looks fab in glasses too.

guest 15 Apr 2014, 17:14

No,

your last post proves you are sane..... and maybe you have been listening to me lol :)

Did you think about the cataract thing???

Are you still thinking about crossing the "pond" soon?

Hope so!

have a good night

Soundmanpt 15 Apr 2014, 15:26

Ellen

I think like myself there are a fair number of what I would call regulars that come in here on a regular basis. I know I have been coming here on a very regular basis since about 2005. Actually the funny thing was for some time before that I was reading all the posts and comments but I didn't know how to get into make comments for a while. I never have much of a computer guy.

Why wouldn't you invite your sister to come on board as well? She certainly doesn't seem to mind talking about her glasses and her vision. It can't hurt to invite her in and let her decide if she likes it or not. My guess is she may find she likes it as much as you or even more.

Ellen 15 Apr 2014, 13:59

Hi Guest. My, youre in trouble if youre relying on me to provide a little sanity!

I do drop into this site now and then and I have wanted to post but wasnt sure what to write. One observation Ive made is that there seem to be a lot of people who dip into this site and provide a flurry of posts and then disappear. Its as though they need their fix and then the OO thing subsides a little. Is that how this obsession works? Does it ebb and flow? Of course there may be a host of other reasons for this and I may be wide of the mark and not for the first time.

I notice that a lot of you have been going gaga over a young American girl who has taken down her Instagram site. What struck me was that her glasses look to be very similar in strength to mine but she looks gorgeous in hers. Its inspired me to visit my optician and look at a more adventurous frame. Im nowhere near as pretty as her so Im starting at a lower base but Ill see how it works out.

I was with my sister the other night, drinking wine after her kids had gone to bed. For some reason we got to talking about our glasses. She confided that her husband seems to like her in glasses or more specifically without them, in squinting mode. I tried to appear surprised and completely guileless about this but was tempted to point her in the direction of this site. Slightly the worse for drink, we got onto comparing what we could see without our glasses. This was quite interesting in that even though my prescription is over twice hers, functionally there wasnt a huge difference between us. We could both just about see where the TV was and if the whole screen was filled someones face she could tell that it was a face and usually whether it was male or female whereas I struggled with that. The distance at which we could see things clearly was very similar, her about 5 inches me about 3 inches. We even swapped glasses and though I was as blind as a bat in hers, she could make her eyes focus a little in mine and said at a push she could function in them although things were still very blurry. We used to do this as kids and back then my prescription was perhaps -10 compared to her -3 or so. The difference then was huge and she was always so amazed at how blind I was.

guest 13 Apr 2014, 17:23

Hello Ellen...

Where are you, we need your sane comments back!

The site is getting out of control.

did you read mine?

waiting

SZ6 27 Mar 2014, 19:20

Hi Ellie,

Could you expound a bit on your glasses fetish and how it manifests itself? As you can probably tell, this board is predominantly men with fetishes for women in glasses. From what you have shared so far, it sounds like you fetishize your own glasses (and maybe your extreme myopia) - does your own need for strong/thick glasses play into your sexuality and sex life? Some of the highly myopic men who post here enjoy getting glasses that emphasize the severity of their prescription, with lenses as thick as possible instead of thin ones. If be curious to understand if your mind works this way as well - seems to be a bit of a rarity among the fairer sex.

Ellie 27 Mar 2014, 16:52

Hi all, thanks for your comments.

And, what kind of comments do you make / questions do you ask your girlfriend of her vision?

Puffin, I tend to get new glasses once a year and I don't wear them in public very often, so it doesn't bother me too much that my lenses are so thick. It's true that I would probably wear my glasses more often if I had thinner lenses, but it's not too big of a deal at this point.

Later on though, when my increases start to slow down, I would definitely like to get some really nice thinner lenses like the 1.74 hi-index or even the 1.9 lenses that I've heard great things about.

Has anyone on this page gotten the 1.9 lenses before and have anything they want to share about them?

In regards to Puffin's question, I perceive "thickness" as any lens that protrudes past the limits of the frame. This obviously doesn't hold as true with metal frames (more so with plastic frames).

Puffin 26 Mar 2014, 09:07

The other thing about choosing certain frames to hide lens thickness is this: especially before hi-index lenses, it's still pretty obvious (by looking at it from the front) that a lens is strong, and by implication is known to be thick whether the lens thickness is visible or not.

You have to wonder if all this is worth it: for a vague impression that it's not as strong as it really is - for a lens 1 or 2 mm thinner, but still "thick" - or a lens that only looks strong from certain angles.

Puffin 26 Mar 2014, 09:00

Crystal Veil

I realise much has changed since say the 70's and 80's when quite a bit of thickness was accepted (if not exactly welcomed), and quite a lot of people these days are either unaware of what things were like then, or have forgotten, so that today's idea of "thickness" (as in thick enough to be called thick) is probably not the same as before. It's as if the "going rate" of thickness has changed (ie diminished).

Even - is there some maximum thickness of "non-thick" lenses, even approximately? How much is too much?

And 26 Mar 2014, 08:12

Ellie, my gf didn't reveal her poor eyesight for months and months - she would sleep in her contacts whenever we spent a night together. She's now far more relaxed about putting her glasses on around the house but is still really self-concious if I ask her about her eyesight.

Crystal Veil 26 Mar 2014, 08:11

Puffin,

interesting question. Much depends on the frame of the glasses. Back in the 1970's and early 1980's, before the arrival of high index lenses, many large frames were designed to be fitted with strong minus lenses. A lens could be 10 or 11 millimeters thick but this was neatly hidden by the way the solid frame folded back towards the arms. Some modern frames by Zenni have that same quality. I always order Zenni glasses with standard 1.57 lenses, Rx usually -8.00 but sometimes around -12. It's amazing to see the difference made by the frame choice. In some glasses the lenses are 7 or 8 millimeters and they really look thick. In other glasses the lenses are 10 or 11 millimeters and they don't look really thick. Of course, much also depends on individual perception and taste.

Puffin 26 Mar 2014, 07:13

Ellie,

mmm,I take it your glasses are getting stronger fast enough not to go for higher index (1.74) at the moment? In the same calculator, the difference seems to be an "almighty" 1.3 mm.

Or is it just you're not worried about that odd millimetre or so here and there? Some people are prepared to pay quite a bit more for not very much, with the right frame they can shave off that millimetre effectively for nothing (smaller frames) next time they buy new frames anyway. Or else some people just accept that pesky extra mm without fussing about it.

Here's a question (for anyone), how thick does a lens have to be before it becomes labelled "thick" - 7mm? 10mm? 12mm?

Ellie 25 Mar 2014, 20:04

Puffin, I have the 1.67 hi-index lenses and my glasses for the past couple of years have always been fairly thick.

I checked on the lens thickness calculator to see if the thickness of my lenses seems appropriate.

Here is an image of my query:

http://imgur.com/DKi7QyP

Puffin 25 Mar 2014, 19:49

that seems a bit thick these days for -14 (?)

Ellie 25 Mar 2014, 18:45

Hello everyone, I have been dating my current boyfriend for about two months now, and I wanted to share some of my experiences regarding his reaction to my glasses.

My prescription is in the -14 range with some astigmatism and I have plastic frames with lenses a little thicker than a centimeter. I almost always wear contacts out in public. Back home and in the college dorms, I change into glasses at night and sometimes wear glasses throughout the day if I don't have plans.

I've never really dated anyone seriously before or spent the night with them, so it was interesting to see how my boyfriend reacted to my glasses when I wore them in front of him for the first time. We had been dating for maybe about a month until I wore them around him. I had hinted that I had poor eyesight and he had asked me before how much I could see when I had my contacts out. (He also wears glasses, but with a much weaker prescription in the -2 range.) He expressed amazement when I showed him how close I had to hold his phone to my eyes before I could properly make out the words, but never teased me or said anything degrading about my vision.

I finally brought my glasses to his place after spending the night many times and I let him try them on and see them. He held them out at arm's length and said that he could only see clearly through them when they were that far away and that everything looked so tiny! He also tried them on briefly but said that he couldn't see anything through them, so took them off soon after.

Since the first time, he's seen me in glasses maybe three or four more times but has never really brought up the topic of glasses with me to either say anything bad or particularly good about them. He has mentioned that I seem a lot more cautious when I'm wearing them as opposed to when I just have my contacts in and has asked me occasionally how much I can see with/without, but that is the extent of it.

I guess I'm just happy to know that he treats me the same whether I am wearing glasses or contacts. I don't know...I guess this might seem like a strange experience to share, but ever since I was little I viewed wearing glasses with a stigma attached to it, especially wearing really strong glasses like mine. I'm surprised that my boyfriend is completely fine with my poor eyesight. I guess I shouldn't really be surprised, but growing up with the mindset that I did, I wasn't sure if anyone could really accept me or see me the same way with and without my glasses. Granted, my boyfriend and I met and got to know each other while I was wearing contacts, so I guess it might have been different if I had been wearing my glasses when we first met. I'm thoroughly happy that he hasn't shown any signs of a negative reaction in the least, but sometimes I wish he could seem them like the sexual object that I view them as. Not sure when would be a good time to bring up that I have a glasses fetish, or what his reaction would be to my confession!

Likelenses 24 Mar 2014, 21:35

Where oh where is the elusive Ellen?

Galileo 20 Mar 2014, 15:42

Hi Cactus Jack - see these articles. Whilst retinal detachment and cataracts are completely different phenomena they are both associated with high myopia.

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1041188/pdf/brjopthal00616-0002.pdf

http://www.iovs.org/content/43/12/3625.full

20 Mar 2014, 07:40

She's in Noo Yawk City, at Toity-Toid and Toid Avenyuh.

Likelenses 19 Mar 2014, 22:41

Ellen

Regarding your comment about your eyes looking to small behind your lenses.

Why not look at it this way.It would be a pleasing,and pleasant time for your boyfriend / husband to see your beautiful large eyes unmasked when you remove your glasses,especially during intimate ,or romantic times.You could even use it as a feminine charm,by slowly removing them on the pretense that you are cleaning them.I think you know how to work your magic on we guys.

By the way what is your eye color?

You must have missed my question of where in New York state your sister lives

Zoe 19 Mar 2014, 10:58

Ellen

What lenses do you choose for your glasses? My prescription is not quite in the realms of your own but good lenses in suitably sized frames can end up surprisingly thin and all high index lenses should come with a coating that, while it will never disguise the full extent of the power rings your rx will create, should eliminate the worst reflections.

Ellen 19 Mar 2014, 10:14

It's not the frames, it's the lenses and the effect they have on the appearance of the eyes. My eyes are barely visible behind a whirlpool of rings and shifting reflections. It's hard to make a case that they could ever be attractive, particularly when larger eyes are meant to be an attractive feminine trait. Its ironic really as my eyes are are perhaps on the too large side without my glasses. Having said that, maybe a more striking frame might help restore my faith in my femininity.

minus5wholuvsgwgs 19 Mar 2014, 02:24

Ellen my own gf is a high myope too -16.25 she has never had difficulty getting male company she dresses conservatively but is just bothered about her glasses she says most men do not even notice them

Paul 19 Mar 2014, 01:26

Ellen,

Sorry if I missed it, but have you worn contacts before? Any issues with them?

You said your glasses are passion-killers. I think that means you should get new glasses. It can be tricky to get very strong lenses to look attractive (to a non-fetishist) but I really think it's possible. The glasses, if done right, can be unique, maybe exotic, and not "bad". I would consider rimless glasses in a small, angular shape.

I am pretty sure that glasses aren't the main determinent of whether a guy finds you attractive. Much much more significant is the confidence and pleasantness you project.

Likelenses 19 Mar 2014, 00:43

Ellen

Just wishful thinking on my part!LOL !

guest 19 Mar 2014, 00:25

Hi Ellen,

You are so right, you don't need guys that don't talk to you because of coke bottles. I don't have a fetish - but glasses "break the ice". Cataracts are just common as we get older and it's a simple way to correct vision. Did you look at the Healthboards web site entry I suggested?

You should be self-conscious of nothing and you are a very intelligent lady. Your vision will not affect your ability to find your mate !! Hope to hear from you soon.

Cactus Jack 18 Mar 2014, 18:25

Galileo,

I believe you are incorrect about a connection between cataracts and myopia. Cataracts are caused by a chemical or molecular change in the protein that makes up your crystalline lenses so it is no longer transparent. Retinal detachment is a physical event caused by the structure that attaches the retina to the back of the eyeball becoming physically strained by the elongation of the eyeball in myopia. The more the eyeball is elongated the more stress on the attachment. Retinal detachment is less common with Hyperopia because the eyeball is not elongated.

Galileo 18 Mar 2014, 17:10

According to what I have read there is a correlation between cataracts and high myopia, just as there is a correlation with retina detachments. It is getting that kind information over the years which has made me feel somewhat guilty about my fetish. It was a long time before I understood all the complications and disadvantages that go with a high prescription; even something as simple as realising people with thick glasses still might not have 20/20 vision.

I agree that thick glasses might be a stereotype which puts some people off making a first approach (though not me) but it could equally be body shape, facial appearance, hair style or any of a myriad of things.

Typecasting yourself according to a stereotype you think other people might be applying to you can be as limiting as real prejudice. Its all in the mind. Again with the benefit of age I look back with some embarrassment on all the prejudices I had when I was younger. Though I did not recognise them as prejudices at the time.

Ellen 18 Mar 2014, 13:20

I'm a little perturbed by your assertion that I will inevitably get cataracts. What have elongated eyeballs got to do with cloudy lenses?

I wasn't getting at you in particular guest, I realise you are fully aware of what it's like to be highly myopic. My point was that on a girl trying to look feminine, very thick lenses can't possibly be construed as an enhancement to her appearance except by someone with a fetish for such things. I also realise that most people with such a fetish are intelligent enough to want a woman for more than just her glasses. I can see that the glasses could well be a bonus on top of her other more traditional assets.

The other thing is that it's not my "fantasy" to be rid of my glasses particularly. I'm not overly enthused by the prospect of elective surgery. It's just that sometimes it would be nice to go out as myself without my optical aids obscuring my eyes. My glasses do elicit a response in anyone seeing me, whether it be conscious or unconscious and I feel that coke bottles do have negative connotations and prejudices associated with them. I'm nothing like the meek, mild, studious, wallflower stereotypically associated with thick glasses and someone would have to get to know me to realise that. The glasses may act as a barrier though and put some men off at the first hurdle so to speak. I can anticipate your response that I'm better off without such shallow men and maybe you're right but like it or not, first impressions do count for a lot.

guest 17 Mar 2014, 22:23

Hi Ellen

Did you read my older posts about glasses not being the issue !! Look at it carefully :) Anyway, with cataracts = they will be mostly gone...

How's the weather

later

Ellen 17 Mar 2014, 12:46

I'm here. Don't recall getting married lately though. Maybe I'm getting forgetful in my old age.

Likelenses 16 Mar 2014, 00:56

guest

She married me!

guest 15 Mar 2014, 17:16

Hello Where did Ellen go ??

Please read the posts

Likelenses 04 Mar 2014, 20:14

Hello again Ellen

In responce to your comment about your " Coke bottles " affecting your " dateability ",as I told you in an earlier post that just your postings exhibit a very intelligent,charming ,and witty lady.

I am sure there are many more attributes that a guy would find in you.

Where in New York state is your sister located?

guest 03 Mar 2014, 21:14

Hi Ellen

Please read my prior post...

Also, read "HealthBoards" there is a thread by "Jackie93" about her mom who is -20 and had cataract surgery and can drive with no glasses a week post op. I responded so look at it.

When I did mine, the measurements were not perfect.

Melyssa 03 Mar 2014, 13:29

Ellen,

You have made very poignant posts, as it were. I had always thought that my -9.00 RX was, well not blind, somewhat close to it, until discovering Eyescene to find out that so many people have stronger prescriptions.

While my myopia may not be extreme, I am just 31 days shy of being a glasses wearer for 50 whole years. Sure I would like to have perfect vision, but Lasix would probably not work for me, and I don't trust it anyway, based upon two women I know who had negative after-effects.

Your statement "I am utterly reliant on two thick pieces of plastic in order to function" hits home with me. At least I made the best of it by having lots of pairs of drop-temples and cat's-eyes in order to have pretty frames to wear, even with the lenses being 1/4 inch to 1/2 inch thick. And of course, I would never leave home without at least two extra pairs besides what I was wearing at the time.

When I decided to go back to college (an all-girls one) to learn a new career, about half of the students wore glasses -- mainly large, plastic frames, but just two others in drop-temples -- and just about all of them had boyfriends (except for me and maybe 3-4 others), so obviously some guys liked girls with glasses. Even though it took until I was in my 40s to find Mr. Right, he enjoys seeing me in all of my big, bold, and beautiful glasses.

Soundmanpt 03 Mar 2014, 13:11

Ellen

It seems as though your vision maybe past the limits of lasik, but have you looked into getting the lens implants? It is costly but so is lasik. But if it is your dream to not need glasses this is certainly something you should look into. At the least i am sure they can reduce your need by quite a bit so that if you did still come away needing glasses they would be much weaker.

Puffin 03 Mar 2014, 13:03

Perhaps it is worth remembering that someone wearing glasses is still a person, who may well have a different opinion about their eyewear than the viewer. It's important to know that they are not just a pair of glasses with a person attached. That can require some thought, as I have found myself.

That being said, there is still (for me) nothing quite like a girl/woman (of any age) wearing glasses. I just can't explain it.

guest 03 Mar 2014, 12:35

first of all....

your fantasy of "going without glasses" will come true !

I was almost as high as you-before cataract surgery. They took much of the minus out with implants-and some of the astig. Still have about -5 and some astig. So, inevitably, you will get cataracts-since we hi myopee's are more prone to them. I have my surg at age 47.

Second, I sort of know how you see without glasses!

Third, many, at least I, are not interested in women, solely because of their vision. It is simply a point in common. I was once told years ago by a lady, (rx similar to ours) that she was looking at me at an event because of my strong glasses (she was in contacts! ...so I didn't even know she was hi minus.) - but after she was talking to me for a while, she liked me for my brains and attitude on the subjects of the event we were attending! That is what I admired about her too!! It wasn't until when we had an actual "date", and I picked her up around lunch, - that when she opened the door, she had sunglasses on with lenses sticking out of the frames to her face and biconcave fronts reflecting. That was a surprise, but not what attracted us to each other! She disclosed what she though the night before a little while later and we laughed about it. We separated when she went to law school in California.

So It's NOT the glasses :)

hope to see you :)

Ellen 03 Mar 2014, 10:21

You know, with respect, I don't think those who've never experienced extreme myopia can really imagine how it is. It's there all day, every day, it never goes away. I am utterly reliant on two thick pieces of plastic in order to function. They're my eyes and if I don't have them within reach I can't do anything. There is no activity I can indulge in without glasses on my face and while I hate using the term blind because it belittles those who are actually blind, that is how I effectively am if deprived of my eyewear. The other side to this is that I love my glasses because without them life would be pretty miserable. However on occasions I have this fantasy where I wonder what it would be like to not have to worry about glasses even for a short while, to be able to go out and look attractive with my face fully on show, with my big blue eyes not hidden behind a whirlpool of plastic. Surely you don't begrudge me that?

I'll be over the pond in the summer when I take my mother to visit my sister. However I won't be meeting any men who are first and foremost interested in the thickness of my glasses.

guest 03 Mar 2014, 07:49

ELLEN-

First of all, if he don't like your glasses-you don't need him !!

Second of all-think - if you lived 100's of years ago, you would be left in a corner and considered blind. You know, people try to help people in wheelchairs and want them to walk....but they don't realize that you would be blind without your glasses...

Now on a different note, I have had g/f in the -20 range and both proudly wore their glasses! One has a high profile job and sometimes enjoys -12 soft contacts and -8 and cyl astig -3 correction for glasses and has a -5 and cyl hanging from her neck for reading. She detests bifocals or progressives. She just got a new colorful rx pair with thick sides and regular thick plastic (about 1/2". Her attitude is, "so what, I'm visually impaired, but can function fine"-told to me while she was driving 90mph on interstate!

On dating, be yourself! It will be fine. When you "cross the pond" again, would be glad to meet you :).

Puffin 03 Mar 2014, 06:03

It's sad that strong glasses can be seen as "passion killers" rather than mundane things (or interesting things, even) - it's not easy to swim against the tide of generally accepted thought - perhaps "normal" people act on a herd instinct, or even hunt like a pack?

Ellen 03 Mar 2014, 04:56

My well meaning sister has been trying to get me out dating again. To be honest success has been mixed and she confided in me the other night that it might be better if "lost the glasses". She's been very good and in a show of solidarity has been wearing her glasses on our nights out when I know she would be much happier in her contacts but I was slightly hurt by the comment. However, on reflection I think I agree and I know she has my interests at heart. I know a nice trendy frame with a moderate prescription and the right eye make up can look stunning but I think there comes a point where trendy accessory crosses over into medical appliance. I'm aware that there's a "niche market", particularly among frequenters of this site, for ultra strong glasses but I know full well that the vast majority of men would view my specs as passion killers. They just don't in any way enhance my appearance, the frames aren't trendy by today's standards, my eyes get lost behind myriad rings and reflections and I can't see well enough to even bother with eye make up. When my husband died I was numb, I wanted to hide from the world and barely went out for a year. I think subconsciously that may have been why I've been so happy to wear ridiculously thick glasses. I can hide behind them, although paradoxically, in their own way they attract a lot of attention but not necessarily for the reasons I'd like.

I'll look at my options regarding "losing the glasses" and report on my findings in a strictly scientific fashion. Will my datability be enhanced by the loss of my coke bottles or not? The scary thing is that if it isn't I don't really have a plan C.

Carrie 24 Feb 2014, 18:17

Clare - she was fine about it. She totally trusts me.

I think the confidence women have now to happily wear glasses is at least partly due to the amazing choice of frames available.

Clare 24 Feb 2014, 16:51

Carrie - thanks, that's nice. And nice too to get a card, though I hope your other half wasn't concerned by that!

Melyssa 22 Feb 2014, 12:01

Plussichic,

Thank you! I wish more women were like me in wanting to wear large, plastic frames, which would make them easier to obtain as well. And good vision is obviously the most important aspect of wearing glasses, with fashion next.

Plussichic 22 Feb 2014, 11:06

Melyssa,

I love your attitude towards your glasses. I wish more were like you, enjoying their eyewear as they should, and also having good vision?

Melyssa 22 Feb 2014, 11:00

Revolver,

I just took a gander at some clips of the movie, and to your post I say these:

1. The reviewer is a twit.

2. Gloria's glasses are pretty.

3. During the 1980s, small frames or metal frames were rare.

4. Even in the 20 years I did not like wearing glasses (the pre-drop-temple era), I never thought I was unattractive in them, just that my glasses were a necessary evil. Of course, now it's "Love me, love my glasses."

Soundmanpt 21 Feb 2014, 21:03

Sz6

Very simple, I have been a volunteer for a non profit vision group for over 40 years and that was how someone in our group came across Zenni as well as other on line sites. We decided on Zenni being the best choice for our group because unlike many of the other sites they keep many of the same glasses no years if they are popular. Many of the other sites get discontinued frames so there is quite often a limited availability issue. So because of that I now have over 65 samples available to show people and so besides helping those with low incomes i can help others as well. So at first i was just helping family members and close friends with saving money on glasses. Well soon those people were telling their friends about me and then I started finding out from many of them that even though they worked many of them don't have health insurance. So between the cost of an eye exam and store prices for glasses paying $300.00 was too much. So I managed to find several optical stores where the doctors understand the problem as well and were willing to do eye exams for less than half of what they normally charge for anyone that doesn't have insurance. So that means an eye exam for $35.00 dollars and glasses for around $15.00. Now over the years the word of mouth has spread and why it came up the other night was unusual. I stopped in for a drink as I recognized the car as being a young lady that had gotten her eye exam and glasses through me about 2 months ago. She didn't have insurance and couldn't afford going to a optical shop at normal prices. Anyway she called over the other girl that was rather new and told her that she needed to talk to me about getting her eyes examined and glasses. Hardly anyone in the restraunt or sports bar business has insurance.

SZ6 21 Feb 2014, 20:08

I have to say I am curious as to how the subject of contact lenses and eyesight came up during small talk with a waitress at a bar, and even more curious as to why she would agree to let a stranger order a pair of eyeglasses for her...

Soundmanpt 21 Feb 2014, 18:50

Revolver

But as you say that was was the thought far too often in the 80's. I remember it well. But now many more young females are embracing their glasses and even if they own contacts wear glasses at least as often. just like the other evening I was chatting with a server (waitress) at a local sports bar and she wears contacts all the time now but only because her glasses are several prescriptions too old to be of much good. She is currenly going after her glasses rx so she can have me order her glasses on line. She e-mailed me today letting me know she works on Saturday evening and she will have her rx by then. She said once she gets her glasses she has every intention of wearing them quite a good bit. In fact i have found many now not even bothering with renewing their contacts anymore. It seems that middle aged women and older are more interested in staying with contacts and I can only assume they haven't caught onto the new trend? And are just so used to contacts they aren't willing to change?

Revolver 21 Feb 2014, 14:54

Several have posted here and on other threads about being a female and feeling unattractive in glasses. This was the prevalent attitude for many years, but has changed, but there are remnants.

Read a movie review syndicated by a leading U.S. newspaper that really pissed me off. The movie is "Gloria" and is about middle aged love having the same spark as teen age.

The main character is a divorced attractive female, but here are direct quotes from the article: "her sex appeal nearly obscured by oversize plastic glasses" and "She's a woman who cares about her looks even while she hides behind huge glasses". The reviewer, a female, can be partially excused as it is a period piece and the actress is wearing frames true to the 80's. But I still don't like it, glasses should be celebrated and not condemned.

Carrie 20 Feb 2014, 20:15

Clare - I'm sure if the men on this site knew where to send a Valentines card to you, you would have had loads of cards. You might have had a card from at least 1 of the ladies on this site, too! You sound very attractive and I bet you look just as good with your glasses on.

I also received a mystery valentines card. I didn't recognise the handwriting - I know the handwriting of all my friends and family even if they try to disguise it! It was a very pleasant surprise. Even though I am incredibly happy in my relationship it's still nice to know other people find me, a short and average looking 20 year old with glasses, attractive.

Clare 19 Feb 2014, 16:42

Soundmanpt - it's significant for me in that I've spent 15 years thinking I have to wear contacts to be attractive to the opposite sex and feel confident. I'm not sure I'll ever find out who sent it, I mix with such a lot of people in my working life that it could be anyone. I'll just accept it for what it is, whatever that is of course!

guest 19 Feb 2014, 08:39

Hello Ellen..

What happened to you :)

???

Soundmanpt 18 Feb 2014, 15:12

Clare

Great to hear! So now you know there is at least one guy out there that must find you very attractive wearing glasses. Now how do you find out who it is? Well that should be fun for you to keep looking around to see who might be starring at you.

Some clues to look for is take notice who seems to be making small talk with you or is watching you a bit more than others.

Wish it was me, but if it were i would have let you know by now that it was indeed me. I sure wouldn't want some other guy to get the credit for it.

Clare 18 Feb 2014, 14:53

Surprise, surprise St Valentine delivered an unexpected card last week. I have no clue from whom - but given I now wear contacts less than 25% of my life, I was pleasantly surprised! No clue who it came from.

Julian 03 Feb 2014, 05:59

Revolver: I've tried three times to post a note about the stories from Bobby's 'dead' site, and each time the message has failed to upload. There are links to them on Vision and spex/Site feedback and news/Bobby's sites. I agree with you about 'Logan's obsession', it's a great story. Some of Dieter's other stories are on Bobby's newer blog, but not that one, so far.

Revolver 02 Feb 2014, 20:58

Have to weigh in on this one, yes, it's a great thread and highly interesting to hear the "whys" from other posters. But I wish to direct your attention to a couple of our most faithful Eyesceners, who have both posted and written essays about the OO thing.

First of all, of course, is Specs4ever. He told me a long time ago via e-mail and then in person (our paths have crossed many times) that he can track his obsession to a teacher with a high minus that he had in grade school...just as was mentioned below.

The other is Dieter, who seems to have gone silent lately, due to Bobby's stories being shut down. He wrote 3 pieces, in separate essays, called Logan's Obsession. He said much the same as posters below, that it started early in his pre-pubescent years and then goes on to brilliantly describe in detail how it came to be. I would suspect it's somewhat autobiographical although there is some fiction (probably) woven into the fabric. It should be back in the archives of Bobby's site, and is highly recommended....but of course, it is strictly from the male point of view.

Likelenses 30 Jan 2014, 19:45

Ellen

Thanks for your reply to my post.The intellect that I previously said that you possess really showed through in that reply.

I liked the part where you stated what your vision would be like with my glasses on ,but conversely for me with your glasses on,my vision would be zilch.

Even though it has been five years,I am sorry for the loss of your husband.

Crystal Veil 30 Jan 2014, 17:59

SZ 6, opus 2

When Nel took off her glasses and wiped the lenses, I noticed that she held them almost pressed to her nose. This was something I had never seen before. I simply said, "You have lovely eyes and you made an excellent choice with the glasses, they suit you well". Later that night I had a better look at the glasses and I realized that they were in the double digits. But it would have made no difference to me if they had been minus five or so. A bonus, yes. A deciding factor, no. It was only after six months that I asked her if she would mind posing in some glasses from my collection. A question never asked to any previous relation although the collection had been there for several decades. But in the preceding year I had seen the website of Alain from Paris ("High myopic girls") and it fascinated me. In my own words, he portrayed "ladies that exist and don't exist at the same time", using glasses with a prescription not unlike Ellen's. Nel cracked up when I talked about taking photos of her in glasses from my collection: "Dear Rob, you don't have anything as strong as my glasses, they are above minus ten!". Within minutes I came back with a box filled with glasses between -10 and -13. We did a clumsy shoot in my garden, neither of us was prepared for it. But she liked some of the pics and the rest is history. We are both still quite surprised by the way it turned into a project that met with much support and approval. End of story....

Crystal Veil 30 Jan 2014, 17:37

SZ 6,

spot on as far as I'm concerned. Strong, independent women are far more attractive to me than the vulnerable ones - and this goes for ladies without glasses and for ladies in glasses. Two examples: 1) In my photo shoots I always try to bring the model's individuality to the foreground and nine times out of ten, they are portrayed in anything but a helpless manner. The phrase most used from my side during shoots is "Chin up, please!". This has to do with the effect sought but above all, with the model's self assurance. Lots of praise as well but the chin is quite important, even when working with models who never got that bit of navigation before. 2) In 2008, I saw a photo of my present life partner and all I knew was, "I have to meet this lady, come what may, and it does not matter if it's just for one occasion!". There was this element of strength combined with introspection in the photo. About the glasses: I could see that she wore minus glasses but that was not a key factor, just a bonus. When I met her, I was fascinated again but really by her vibrant personality. Halfway the evening we walked to the second pub. It was raining and she stopped, took off her glasses to clean them, saying "I have bad eyes"

(2Bctd, 1200 words is the limit)

SZ6 30 Jan 2014, 17:19

I think I'm somewhere in the middle of this spectrum. I've had very strong "OO" tendencies for almost 20 years (I'm in my 30's now). For me, (strong) glasses aren't a make-or-break component of my attraction to a woman, but they're a very strong preference. Of the five serious relationships I've had as an adult, only one was with a woman who didn't need correction. So my track record kind of speaks for itself.

However, if I'm not attracted to someone without glasses, glasses won't magically make her appealing to me. This fall, I went on a few dates with an extraordinarily myopic woman around my age. I think her glasses were about -20, and she wore them almost all the time. But I just didn't really click with her in terms of personality, and she was kind of plane-Jane in appearance other than her fantastic glasses. I just wasn't feeling romance, so I broke it off with her.

There are certainly themes of dependence and vulnerability and "imperfect beauty" that make up my attraction to heavily-bespectacled women. I'm sure that my own visual history (-10 in contacts, struggles with going uncorrected as a kid) is behind this part of the attraction. There are probably plenty of subconscious factors I haven't thought of as well.

As I've grown as a sexual being and started to learn more about consensual kink and BDSM, I've learned that the kinkier side of my OO doesn't indicate any desire for someone who is weak, submissive, and easily-dominated in a relationship. Indeed, I want and need a partner who's strong, independent, and direct - but willing and eager to play on the edge of the darker side of sexuality, especially when it involves eyewear, vision, and all the ways they can be played with in the bedroom.

Puffin 30 Jan 2014, 17:15

Yes I think the starting point for attraction is not just the glasses, it sure helps if the person is interesting in other ways. But - I will usually at least try to make friends with anyone with interesting glasses.

Juicebox 30 Jan 2014, 16:30

This thread is fascinating! I kind of lean towards the Crystal Veil side of things. If I'm not attracted to a guy without glasses, I'm not likely to be attracted to them with. When I met my boyfriend, I didn't know he wore glasses, so it was an added bonus when he took out his contacts one evening and wore his glasses :) That was very early in the relationship and he regularly wears them when we're together, I think his comfort with wearing them so regularly has had a big impact on me starting to feel a lot more confident wearing them. I wouldn't have minded if he didn't wear glasses though, to me glasses are more of a bonus rather than a deciding factor!

Crystal Veil 30 Jan 2014, 15:32

Ellen,

a bit more text from my side. To me, a not so attractive (body and mind)lady can't be changed into an interesting or even desirable lady when she puts up a pair of glasses. I do lots of photo shoots with models who pose in prescription glasses from my huge collection. My approach during photo shoots is pretty much the way an optician looks at his clients. The first half of the photo shoot is about glasses near the model's own prescription (e.g. very mild prescriptions if the model has perfect eyesight), the second half of the shoot is about strong glasses. Opticians and companies that design glasses only show half the product they are trying to sell: glasses with plano lenses or even empty frames. The project started with amateur models but nowadays it's mostly freelance and professional models. It may sound strange but I am never in shortage of models. I only pay a very small fee but for them, a photo shoot in real glasses is useful for their portfolio and several models have benefited from that. The aim of the project is: 1) show the personality of each model, 2) show the beauty of ladies in glasses, 3) show the opticians how their photography could be made far more realistic and effective, and 4) show that an attractive lady can look even more attractive when she is wearing strong glasses. There is still a stigma around that and I'm simply trying to take away some of that stigma. My collection hosts glasses with all prescriptions between +16 and -29 and it covers all the styles from the past century and the present. All the models find it a fascinating experience and many have been back to do more shoots. And finally a personal note: to me, glasses are to be used at daytime. Between the sheets I always prefer the lady without her glasses, hence the name Crystal Veil. So I suppose this would put me on the mild side of the spectrum but I'm always interested to read contributions from members who go further. After all, we are all different and this is what makes Eyescene an interesting and pleasant environment.

Puffin 30 Jan 2014, 13:57

My sense of attraction to bespectacled ladies varies in reason and form over time, in recent times I have been most attracted and interested in how the eyes look behind lenses, to me I find them alluring and appealing (finding the right words to express this isn't so easy).

As for the other aspects/reasons for interest - yes they are of interest, but in recent times, not so much as they were.

lentifan 30 Jan 2014, 12:36

I have been what no doubt many folks here would call an OO as long as I can remember. However, I don't think the attraction to me of girls who wear glasses is connected with perceived weakness, although who but (perhaps) a psychiatrist can truly say.

Rather it is the glasses themselves I find attractive, and the stronger the lenses, the more attractive. Thus it follows that ladies wearing glasses with strong lenses are more attractive than those wearing glasses with low-power lenses. I am more attracted to ladies who are 'pretty' than those who are conventionally beautiful. But seeing a lady groping blindly for her glasses or without her glasses would not specially turn me on.

Does this make sense?

Ellen 30 Jan 2014, 05:49

There seems to be a spectrum here from those who like the look of glasses regardless of prescription to the more hardcore obsessives as you call them. I would say that an obsession is usually a negative thing and to focus on the one feature, namely bad eyesight, to the exclusion of other characteristics is perhaps unhealthy and potentially damaging to the quality of life of the individual. How many OO's welcome and enjoy their obsession and how many would rather not have it, I wonder.

Likelenses, you're right. My glasses are twice as strong as yours but in terms of how compromised we are without correction, there is almost no difference. I don't feel any more "blind" than I did as teenager when my prescription was quite a bit less. The curious thing though is that if I were to wear your glasses my sight would still be even poorer than yours is without glasses. Physics and the law of diminishing returns in action.

Dating? Let me see. My husband wore glasses (I've been widowed for five years) but I've not had anyone very long term since. Before I met him I had four proper boyfriends, all bar one had infuriatingly perfect vision, the other being very mildly myopic. I can honestly that eyesight played no role in the attraction I felt for any of them, positively or negatively.

Likelenses 30 Jan 2014, 03:59

Ellen,

Please keep in mind that many of the guys here that like women in glasses, also wear glasses,and some quite strong.

There is a term used here,OO, or optical obsessive.It applies equally to men,and women.

Astra is a female,and has contributed her thoughts,and I would hope that Clare would contribute hers also,particularly regarding men that wear glasses,especially strong ones.

As I think that you would agree,there is a point in ones prescription history where vision without glasses is impossible.For me that point was about -6.00. So my point is that without my -10.5 glasses,I am in the same boat as you are without yours.We both are nonfunctional without glasses,even though yours are almost two times more power than mine.And yours would look stronger,but most people would not notice that power difference.If we were walking down the street,or better yet on a date together they wold perhaps just think that we both have rather strong glasses.

By the way have you dated mostly guys with or without glasses?And if with glasses ,perhaps give us a reason why that may be.

Dan 29 Jan 2014, 22:46

The woman I'm currently dating wears glasses sometimes. I posted about her slight prism prescription back in the summer on "Vision" thread I believe. We started dating in the fall..but I digress.

She has told me numerous times she loves me in glasses (I'm slightly myopic but wear contacts most of the time). I don't believe she has a fetish but really likes me in glasses (or without for that matter). Naturally, I've told her that I really like the way she looks in glasses and at one point she asked me if it turned me on. I said yes but that she didn't have to wear them to do that haha. It's great to have found someone who I like no matter what with the glasses as an added bonus.

Galileo 29 Jan 2014, 14:39

I have been analysing my motivation on the glasses thing for many years. I agree there may have been some element of being intimidated by girls and wanting to level the playing field when I was young; but that is not the case today I am comfortable and confident with women. Where did the glasses fetish come from? I have asked myself that for a long time as well. Like Minus5wholuvsgwg I thought I was a unique freak for years until I found Eyescene.

I had this from a very early age, before I was even sexually aware. I remember at the age of around 6 having a crush on a school teacher who wore glasses with a moderate prescription. These days I recognise you cant build a relationship around glasses, the first criteria is the chemistry between two people. Physical attraction might initiate the first approach but the lasting connection comes from things like common interests and the ability to communicate. I was married for a long time to a woman who did not wear glasses and when I think about all my relationships over the years glasses wearers are in a minority. I wonder if the fetish means that a relationship with a glasses wearer is doomed since the wearer is inevitably going to have the thoughts and doubts that Ellen expressed when he/she is fully aware of the fetish?

Carrie 29 Jan 2014, 07:19

Soundmanpt

Gemma didn't really want to wear her glasses full time even though she knew she would be better off. She didn't like being the centre of attention (apart from attention from a friend or girlfriend) and the thought of people making comments about her wearing glasses terrified her. It took a while, but I helped her become more confident. She had the confidence in her, she just didn't use it much. She was the one who made the first move at the Christmas party and asked if she could give me a Christmas kiss and then really went for it when I hinted that I really liked it and that she could kiss me again. She gave me the confidence to stop denying to myself that I was attracted to women.

In our "intimate" times she does things with glasses that she knows I love. She will take her glasses off slowly while looking at me in a certain way - I can't describe it, but I just know the look - and that's a silent signal that she wants me NOW. She likes me to let her take my glasses off my face and then gently brush the hair back behind my ears with her fingers. I can't exactly describe the feeling but it is incredibly arousing. If I do it to myself it has no effect at all.

I try not to be obvious when I check out other women (and the very rare occasions I check out a man a man). Gemma will elbow me quite hard if she notices me doing it. As you said, she knows I'm only window shopping but there is a point when it becomes annoying for her. Sometimes I will deliberately get noticed checking out a woman who isn't wearing glasses just to (hopefully) balance the numbers out in Gemma's mind.

I really don't know what I'd say if she asked about my attraction to glasses wearing women.

guest 29 Jan 2014, 06:41

Hi Ellen

Its your wit and brains first....as others said, sharing vision issues just becomes the icing on the cake!

Ready to cross the pond :)

Astra 29 Jan 2014, 06:03

Re: Ellen 29 Jan 2014, 04:48

I am from China, I believe you think too much , about attractive

For me, relationship is not about attractive, it is about family bonding each other.

While I consider defected vision is very attractive, family bonding is always more important than very attractive. Having a close-knit family is better than using attractive to "compete" for a mate and build a family.

Ellen 29 Jan 2014, 04:48

Like most women I'm happy to be considered attractive due to physical features such as my figure, my face and so on but also, and mostly, for my mind. Looks fade, as does the intoxicating initial physical attraction between two people. The things I want to be valued for are what we conventionally see as positive traits whereas my poor vision clearly isn't and I do struggle with concept of arousing desire in someone essentially due to a defect. Of course you could turn the defect into a positive and say that the thing being admired is the way I deal with having severely limited uncorrected vision and how I triumph over this "disability". I'm not sure this is the case though. There is a lot of talk about being turned on by women struggling to see and being vulnerable and I wonder at the root of this. I'm no expert but it seems to be that it could be down to feeling perhaps intimidated by women and needing to add in that sprinkling of vulnerability to level the playing field a little. Please tell me if I'm out of line here, I certainly don't want to upset anyone, I just find this stuff fascinating.

One other observation I have is that despite mild protestations to the contrary, poor eyesight seems to be THE main attraction and other physical attributes are secondary. I think I could handle turning a partner on using my vision as a stimulus so long as I was convinced that that wasn't the main event, that I was valued much more for my other attributes.

Likelenses 29 Jan 2014, 02:03

Ellen

Just from your posts I know that you are a caring,intelligent,attractive,and yes a witty woman.

All attributes that all men love to find,and speaking for myself,you would be a woman that I would be attracted to with or without glasses.The fact that you wear glasses,even if they were weak ones,are just kind of like frosting on the cake.

Galileo 28 Jan 2014, 14:07

And one more thing - I did decide to have the conversation about my fetish because 1) I felt guilty feeling the way I did about her glasses and her vulnerability without them whilst she did not know how I was feeling. So telling her got that out in the open and cleared it up 2) I wanted her to participate in some of the fantasy elements of the glasses fascination, which was best done with her fully understanding what it was all about

I found it stressful when I was in a relationship with a GWG and she didn't know the effect the glasses were having on me. I shared to a lessor extent in the other relationships, but neither of those lasted that long anyway

Galileo 28 Jan 2014, 13:49

Ellen - I was pleased to see you add your thoughts on this one. I did contemplate asking you what you would think of the scenario where you met a glasses fetishist and then I chickened out :)

My dream of course would be to find a woman like you who I also liked for herself and not just her glasses. Some guys ask out girls with blonde hair, others ask out girls with long legs and sexy hips, others ask out girls with an expansive chest, and others ask out girls who wear glasses. I think most of us approach people to date based on some sort of physical attraction in the first place. What happens after that depends on what you find when you get past the physical attraction and into the person.

If I met someone who wore strong glasses and who I liked as much as my current girlfriend, then in all honesty I would probably switch. In the meantime I do check out women I meet with glasses, though I have not met anyone in the last couple of years who made me want to switch. After the first couple of conversations it is apparent there is not much there beyond the high prescription.

In my case with the girl I shared my fetish with it came several months into the relationship when I took a deep breath and over dinner one night explained the whole thing. By then we did have a good relationship. I was afraid she would freak out, but she did not. We then enjoyed a year of glasses games and many other things before we finally realised we were on different paths with different standards and aspirations and the relationship ended.

Ellen 28 Jan 2014, 11:35

Well thank you for the invite guest. The thing is how will I know of you want me there for my sparkling wit or because I have strong glasses?

Soundmanpt 28 Jan 2014, 10:07

Carrie

Even though Gemma has never said anything to you, or you to her, about your attraction to women wearing glasses I have to believe she is well aware of it. Do you really think that it was just coindence that she started wearing her glasses full time right after you met her? I'm sure during your intimate times with her that there are little things that she has taken note of, It could be something like removing each others glasses. Even though you probably work hard at not being noticed when your checking out another girl wearing glasses, she has noticed. None of us are that good if we see someone wearing glasses that strikes our fancy not to take a better look. Its that better look that gets noticed. Gemma just doesn't say anything because she gets it and she has enough faith in you to know your only window shopping.

guest 28 Jan 2014, 10:01

Hi Ellen and group...

Next time you are in the states we should have a get together lunch or dinner! Great idea. It would be interesting to see who comes. Some lenschat people are from the area where your sis lives.

minus5wholuvsgwgs 28 Jan 2014, 09:08

I think that saying you like girls(or men) in glasses is perfectly normal however a liking for high minus glasses is I thought unique to me Well that was until I found the internet and realised that I was not alone I think that my initial attraction to high minus glasses was because when I first needed glasses at the age of 8 a youngish female teacher of about 22 wore very strong glasses and I think I had a bit of a crush .Of all my various girlfriends and a couple of wives virtually all have been short sighted up to about minus 6 except 3 all 3 of whom were minus 10 plus my current gf is minus 16.25 in her worst eye She knows I like glasses but does not realise I like strong ones in fact I am unsure if she realises how strong her prescription is

Ellen 28 Jan 2014, 08:12

How does one broach the subject of telling one's partner that you have an erotic fascination with their less than perfect eyesight and associated corrective apparatus? Do you sugar the pill at first by passing it off as a mild preference, perhaps on a similar level to favouring a particular hair colour? Or do you go straight for it and explain the full impact from the outset? For those who don't tell a partner, is it difficult or even stressful keeping it under wraps? Are you forever on your guard worrying about being "discovered"?

I'd like to think that I would be able to spot someone showing more interest in my glasses than my other attributes. I can't honestly say I've noticed anyone behaving in this way but maybe I'll be more sensitive to it in future, having discovered this site.

Carrie 26 Jan 2014, 17:47

I don't think my girlfriend knows about my thing for glasses. If she does know she has never said anything. It is a bonus that she wears glasses but I fell in love with her before she started to wear glasses full time. If she ever got contacts or eye surgery I would still fancy and love her. She puts up with me occasionally checking out other women but I don't think she's noticed that those women usually have glasses on. She absolutely trusts me that I wouldn't cheat on her, and I wouldn't cheat on her.

This is my first relationship with someone who wears glasses. I didn't realise quite how much I liked glasses so much until I got my own. (I used to wear fake ones at school because I liked how I looked in them). My ex never said he liked girls with glasses but he quite liked it when I got glasses and his current girlfriend wears glasses.

Galileo 26 Jan 2014, 04:26

The fact is that for me strong glasses provide a bigger turn-on than anything else. And that does become obvious over time. I have had three girlfriends who needed correction of between +6 and -9. The one I was with the longest knew all about my fetish and her attitude was "well, my eyesight is my eyesight and if it turns you on then that is the first positive thing I have about my glasses"

But of course it is the glasses rather than the girl which are the turn on, and that can be difficult for the girl to reconcile. How much of my feelings are for her and how much for her glasses? - the question came up a few times. In that case, in the end, it was the glasses and not the person so the relationship ended.

My current girlfriend wears reading glasses which look great on her and occasionally progressives which she is not really comfortable with. They also look great on her. She does wear her glasses in bed occasionally and knows I enjoy that, but this relationship really is more about the person and the glasses have become a side issue.

I think it is inevitable girls will ask that question if you are an OO and it is not easy to answer truthfully. Certainly I stayed in the other relationship longer than made sense; and I stayed because of her glasses.

Crystal Veil 26 Jan 2014, 03:25

til,

broad smile of recognition - my experience with lady partners and glasses could fill a book. The ladies' reactions on my collection of vintage glasses were usually the first hurdle to be taken. My present life partner Nel is highly supportive and still amazed by a world unknown to her before we met.

til 25 Jan 2014, 05:45

Having had an argument with my girlfriend I was just wondering about how partners deal with ones fascination or fetish for glasses.

All of my girlfriends so far have been at least accepting my fetish, if not embracing it. None of them apart from my present girlfriend actually needed correction, so I've been very lucky so far. Now the girl I'm with at the moment has a fairly mild plus prescriptions a only occasionally wears her glasses. I am actually more fascinated by minus lenses and she is okay with wearing glasses up to -2 sometimes. What makes me a very happy man:) now in our little argument (we both were a little drunk) she confronted me about being too fixated on glasses. She said she was wondering if she is still attractive for me even when she is not wearing glasses which she of course is. But she was right, I may have been complimenting her too much on wearing glasses and not enough on other things that are more important to her. Anyway I explained to her that glasses are just an extra bonus to a girl and don't have anything to do with my feelings for her. She was okay with that explanation and I learned my lesson.

Now I was asking myself how other partners deal with this kind of thing. Do you tell them? Are they okay with it? D they even understand/support it?

Looking forward to other experiences.

Crystal Veil 06 Aug 2013, 01:55

Chris, Soundmanpt, notatl and Galileo,

in addition to your interesting discussion: there was a short article in a Dutch newspaper about an Englishman who grabbed glasses from the faces of girls and ladies in the streets. He then ran away with the glasses, leaving his helpless victims behind. None of the victims was able to give a good description of the man's face but they told the police that he was a postman in uniform. The man was finally arrested but the newspaper did not mention if he still had the glasses in his possession. If my memory serves me correctly, this was in 1966 or 1967. I remember reading the article with a mixture of emotions. I felt it was clearly a good thing that the man was arrested, but the story triggered me and within a couple of years I started collecting glasses, buying them at the Amsterdam flea market. Around the same time, I had a relation with a girl who had switched to contact lenses because her glasses were gradually becoming too thick. When we split up after a year, she asked me for a keepsake and I gave it to her. She then asked me if I wanted a keepsake from her and I asked for a pair of glasses. Not the pair she was still wearing occasionally but her previous pair. She was amazed but she gave me the glasses. They were among the very first glasses in my collection. Somehow it felt special because of the knowledge that they were hers. The glasses were transparent with a dark brown eyebrow line. The frame had a touch of the cat eye era. She told me that her old prescription was minus six (L) and minus eight (R). Unfortunately, the old plastic frame started crumbling after a couple of decades and then broke at the nose piece, clearly beyond repair. It's a pity that this happened long before I started doing photo shoots.

Galileo 05 Aug 2013, 21:43

I've moved the glasses of three of my former girlfriends for the sexual thrill of watching them groping and feeling their dependency, but that was all consensual. I too have ethical standards which would not let me steal a pair of glasses from a girl. Likewise I could not leave a myopic woman without her correction.

It is a paradox of feelings which still makes me uncomfortable and yet aroused after more than 50 years as a OO.

notatll 05 Aug 2013, 21:16

"I wonder though how many of us would cross that line and go as far as actually stealing a pair of glasses to gain this kind of gratification."

I probably would. But just for a little while.

Soundmanpt 05 Aug 2013, 10:47

Chris

Now I have it much easier and I don't have to consider stealing them or taking them from the lost and found box. Because I am with a non profit vision group I get my hands on hundreds of glasses every year. Also many of the people I do outside business of ordering glasses for know that I am with this group so they usually give me their old glasses as well.

Soundmanpt 05 Aug 2013, 10:41

Chris

I get what your saying, but I really hope we don't cause anyone to somehow consider stealing someone's glasses. I don't think we really should want pleasure from someone struggling to see because we stole her glasses. Even worse it could be a hardship not only visually but financially as well. To replace glasses is not cheap.

All that having been said i did something when I was around 15 years old. I often went to the local movie house on weekends and one night I happened to see a box and it was marked "Lost and Found" Looking in it I saw a glass case and the case was pink with some markings on it so little doubt it belonged to a girl. No one was around and I reached down a snatched it. I couldn't wait until I could get alone to check out the glasses inside. Finally back home in my room I took out the glasses, they were very girly. I looked through them and of course at that time I had no idea about prescriptions but they weren't very strong as I could see pretty good with them. I could hardly keep my hands off of them. I always wondered what the girl looked like that they belonged to. I even wondered how she was getting along without them.

All these years later I am not proud of what I did and I know how wrong it was. I really hope that the girl was able to get a new pair and didn't get in too much trouble.

Chris 05 Aug 2013, 09:41

I think Jude's experience raises some interesting and perhaps uncomfortable points. I'm sure the majority of visitors to this site would gain some level of enjoyment from watching a myopic woman struggle to see without her glasses (and I include myself in this). I wonder though how many of us would cross that line and go as far as actually stealing a pair of glasses to gain this kind of gratification. I personally wouldn't, not because I'm particularly a goody two shoes but due to a combination of reasons, some ethical and some due to a downright fear of being caught, arrested, humiliated etc. However I'm sure there are some who would and I'm betting that if this guy was an OO he would also at some point have visited this site. We're lucky that our particular obsession is for the most part harmless (save for the inordinate amount of time we spend pandering to it), although I often wonder if it could in extreme cases drive someone to less savoury acts.

It's a shame, Jude's post could have opened up some lively and interesting debate but it seems most of us are only really interested in ogling pictures of women in glasses. Shouldn't we be more open and welcoming? Jude wasn't exactly embraced with open arms and yet she is just the sort of person I would love to communicate with, a myopic woman willing to talk about her myopia. This site too often indulges in killing the goose that lays the golden eggs.

envious 15 Jul 2013, 11:45

Jude

My message was a bit 'tongue in cheek' but I can understand your feelings. It just goes to show people are not always what they appear. A bit of detective work is called for here as he was bound to have left some clues to help trace!!

Jude 15 Jul 2013, 10:45

Who said I didn't have a spare pair of glasses? I didn't say such a thing. I actually had my contacts with me, although the day before, I had torn one which was why I was wearing glasses on the night in question. I spent the remaining two days of my trip wearing one lens.

This is somewhat deviating from my point however, that some b#####d thought it was OK to help himself to my glasses without the slightest concern as to the effect this would have on me. I thought this would be a good place to come to get some insight into the thought processes going on this individual's mind but the subtext I'm getting here is that I brought this on myself and somehow deserved it. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. thanks for your help guys.

Envious 15 Jul 2013, 09:42

Jude

I hope you had a good night to look back upon. Your glasses seem to have made an impression which I hope was shown to you in some way. Did he wear glasses - perhaps he had lost his also and was in need . Hardly likely but I just trust your loss was worth something and you have some delight to recall

Julian 15 Jul 2013, 09:33

OK Jude, but if you're as blind as that why on earth did you go travelling without a spare pair of glasses? My vision isn't too bad, but I always carry a spare, because more than once when I've been staying in a strange place I've sat on mine or something like that.

Jude 15 Jul 2013, 05:46

Regardless of how it happened I'm intrigued by the psychology of why someone would do this. What do they get out of it?

To cut a long story short I spent the night with guy in my hotel room. He left early saying he had to go to work and having finished my business commitments and having two free days I went back to sleep. It was only when I woke an hour later that I realised my glasses weren't where I'd left them on the nightstand by my bed.

Soundmanpt 14 Jul 2013, 09:05

Jude

I'm certain it was likely someone with a glasses fetish or someone that wanted to put you in situation where your vision would be extremely limited. But I have to ask how it was that if your short sighted to where your dependent on your glasses why did you have them off and lying where they could be stolen.

You didn't say, but how were you able to manage during the rest of your business trip without your glasses? That had to be a rather scary situation to be unable to see anything very well and in a strange city?

Jude 14 Jul 2013, 08:50

A few months ago while on a business trip I had my glasses stolen by a guy I met in bar. Being very short sighted I was left in a rather distressing situation. I have no idea why anyone would do this, the glasses have no real intrinsic value to someone without an identical prescription to me. Could it have been a fetish driven act? Any thoughts on this would be welcome.

Mr Cockeyed 24 Jun 2013, 08:59

They probably do no vision screening, so they all wind up with over -3.00 for a first rx

Astra 24 Jun 2013, 01:56

In this Chinese thread, most of the users say their first glasses was higher than -3.0

http://tieba.baidu.com/p/2368486503

JES 27 Apr 2013, 00:02

In my previous post I wrote about my fantasy of a perfect night out. Boy meets girl in a club and they walk home together. She decides to stay overnight. While undressing, handsome boy takes out contact lenses, and puts on his - 15 D, rimless coke-bottles. How would a girl react to this? He hasn't mentioned about his nearsightedness before, and now seems a bit apologetic. Any girls here..? How would you feel?

12 09 Apr 2013, 20:01

Thanks! It was nice to hear of your previous fantasy too.

JES 07 Apr 2013, 07:31

Nice to hear of other peoples fantasies. I am a mild -3.5D, but have always lusted for more Rx. Back in the early nineties when I used to date, you could not buy glasses with any prescription you liked. When I went out clubbing, I used to wear contacts, because girls used to be put off by glasses. Coming home with a girl, however, I would take out my contacts and wear my large aviators (-2,5D at the time). My dream would have been to put a pair of -15D, terribly thick, minifying, rimless coke-bottles on my nose, pretending to be extremely shortsighted and see how the sweet girl would have reacted.

I never, however, got to do this, because before the time of internet it just wasn't possible getting any prescription one liked, and also there were no glasses folr sale in the local charity shops. I guess they were all sent to third world countries.

Nowadays I am happily married and still a glasses wearer and a great fan of gwg.

1 04 Apr 2013, 01:29

1 is the first number of my zip code. This is the first of five installments if someone will reply and help make my dream come true. I am slightly myopic. However, to make my fantasy come true, I have been doing the exercises from Lieberman's Take Off Your Glasses and See book. My fantasy is to have the tall, blond nurse test my vision with and without my glasses when I go in for my next visit. I believe that my vision is now perfect without my beloved glasses. I want her to rip them from my face and smash them with her foot after i test perfectly without them. I would be glad to talk about this in four more installments (numbers to the zip code of my town's "Family Health Center".

Will you help make my fantasy come true?

lazysiow 22 Feb 2013, 19:26

0 actually. Talking from recent experience. Feels like finally i have a perfect distance/full time prescription. Was -0.5 in my younger years but eyes have flip flopped to reading glasses age. I would always take them off for seeing up close though, and if anything this one might have been correct all along. It was really the astigmatism that was bothering me, everything else can be accomodated.

Asdoo 22 Feb 2013, 18:00

lazysiow

What was the sphere?

lazysiow 22 Feb 2013, 04:25

It was for me even for -0.5 worth of astigmatism. Had the same reaction as she did, many things that were fuzzy or unreadable popped into crystal clear focus. While many would say that the amount is negligible and not noticeable it wasn't the case for me, I didn't want to take them off at all and when I did it was like I was hit with multiple rays of blur at once. I have oblique (diagonal) angles in both eyes and imo that makes it more untolerable than 90, 180 etc.

Revolver 21 Feb 2013, 12:47

Not sure which thread to use, this one seems as appropriate as any. There's a video that's been posted on YouTube for some time, about a very pretty, intelligent, and articulate young lady driving her car to get her first glasses. You can find it by going to YouTube and on the search line type Four Eyez, it'll be about the second one down.

Go to 2:28 and she says "I'm driving to somewhere that will potentially change my life. I'm going to pick up prescription glasses". She then explains why, and continues after she gets them and exults on how clear everything is in the distance etc., obviously a first time myope.

My question for the myopes here is whether "change my life" is too strong a phrase. She makes no bones about what is on her mind prior to getting them and then the effects of putting them on, an experience which we non-myopes haven't had.

What was going through your mind when you first found you needed them? Were you elated like she was or the opposite? And, was it a life changing experience?

varifocals 11 Jan 2013, 08:46

Yes lip reading can be good.

We had a TV murder which was partly solved by a lip reader from CCTV footage.

Melyssa 11 Jan 2013, 08:43

I have read that blind people have much better-working senses otherwise, although in the opposite case, I know some deaf people whose vision ranks with that of sports officials.

And I have found personally that looking at someone's lips when said individual is talking helps me hear him/her better.

Lv2c4i 11 Jan 2013, 06:43

Perhaps a simple explanation to the improved hearing: many of us may not be aware of how much "lip-reading" we do as we listen. What we see augments what we hear. And, with glasses, one is better able to watch/read the lips of a speaker, so they "hear" better.

10 Jan 2013, 20:40

lentifan,

If you can get a copy, I urge you to read: "Train Your Mind, Change Your Brain: How a New Science Reveals Our Extraordinary Potential to Transform Ourselves" by Sharon Begley. The book is the result of Ms. Begley's research as a science reporter for Newsweek.

The research, reported in the book, was sponsored by the Daiai Lama and was conduced by Neuro-Scientists. You can Google the title and read a synopsis on Amazon.com and perhaps others. I got the book and read it several years ago.

The research revealed that the brain does have the ability to reprogram itself even into old age. In the case of a person with no sight or diminished sight, the brain can move resources, both physically and by "re-wiring" to devote unused resources to other, more useful, tasks such as hearing. It is also possible for a person to Train their mind and cause the brain to grow and or devote resources to new skills.

The book is very easy to understand and is worthwhile reading.

I don't think this was mentioned in the book, but I saw a TV program recently about a person with no sight had developed the ability to "see" with their ears. They apparently had developed the ability to use environmental sounds to develop a mental picture of where objects were located. I also saw a program about a young man, in the UK, (I think) who had been blind from birth. He had developed a technique of making clicking sounds and using the echoes so accurately that he was able to ride a bicycle safely. Dolphins and Whales do it and evidently a human can learn to do it.

Our member, 4eyes from Brazil, has exceptional hearing.

lentifan 10 Jan 2013, 18:36

I too have heard people (mostly elderly) say they hear better with their glasses on. I've no idea whether there is any evidence for this.

As for the widely believed theory that the blind have better hearing, could this simply because they concentrate harder on what they hear? Many of us, particularly the more mature amongst us, probably rely on lip-reading more than we realise - a luxury not available to the blind.

Crystal Veil 10 Jan 2013, 16:47

Martymyope, likelenses, Revolver,

interesting discussion. I was a stage musician for most of my life and my experience - and that of may others on stage - is exactly the opposite. Many performers don't wear their glasses on stage because they want to focus on the sound rather than the sight. It's not a matter of vanity, it has to do with imagination. It's also the reason why my models (at photo shoots) who managed to deliver a natural, credible look through glasses way beyond their own prescription had some experience on stage.

It goes even further from the hearing point of view. A Jewish lady who went into hiding during World War 2 (not Anne Frank) played 78 rpm records that were so scratched that the lady who gave her shelter asked, how on earth can you listen to this beautiful music from these damaged records? The answer of the Jewish lady was, "I hear the music more beautiful this way". When I read this it made no sense to me until I started collecting 78 records of Irish musicians in the 1980's. I got a very worn 78 made by an Irish piper in the early 1920's and the music sounded like heaven. Some years later a better copy of that record arrived and I was really disappointed. The bits and pieces that my brain had filled in simply did not exist. Some years later I had a similar experience with cylinder recordings that had been cleaned.

It is said that the blind can hear better than the visual unimpaired. Is this a myth or does it have to do with the power of imagination? Meaning that a down to earth person hears better when she / he can see well and someone with a sense for abstraction has the opposite experience?

Reactions are more than welcome!

Revolver 10 Jan 2013, 13:41

Don't know how common it is, but I know of one actual example and it was a very young lady. Back in middle school I had a great girlfriend, not in the boyfriend/girlfriend sense she was just a very good friend who happened to be a girl and live in the neighborhood.

She was one year behind me in school, and I believe it was about her 6th grade year when she tried on a friend's glasses and could see so well she got them. She was very smart and as nice as she was smart, and readily shared her whole experience plus willingly let others try her glasses and many got them also because of that. She started at about a -1.00 with a +1.00 add, then moved up to a -1.50 or so and then by the time 8th grade rolled around she was a little over -3.00. An eye exam was an annual event for her, so she had a collection of 3 or 4 pairs by the time she got to high school.

Strangely, while she didn't mind wearing glasses she didn't mind not wearing them ever when she got over -3.00, it was as if it was an afterthought and of course a thing when she absolutely needed them for the board, shows, etc.

Once I asked her when we were sitting on a park bench talking she didn't wear them all the time because they obviously helped her a lot. She just kind of passed the question off, but then distinctly stated: "but it's funny, I can hear a lot better when I have them on" and we both started to giggle. But she insisted it was true, and eventually reached the conclusion on her own it was because one of the most important senses is clear vision and with that the other ones were able to function properly.

Likelenses 10 Jan 2013, 01:53

Marty Myope

Actually that is quite common.

Marty Myope 09 Jan 2013, 12:52

My grandmother used to say she could hear better with her glasses on! :)

Astra 13 Sep 2012, 06:36

http://www.wfnews.com.cn/edu/2010-03/05/content_655331.htm

According to a report Friday by South Korea's Chosun Ilbo newspaper, President Lee Myung-bak has started wearing eyeglasses after cataract surgery on his right eye February 13, and his new image has gained him popularity for appearing gentler。

The report said Lee has to wear the glasses for at least two weeks, as suggested by his doctor。

Lee aroused heated discussion after he wore a pair of brown-frame glasses to attend a midday banquet Thursday at Blue House, hosted by the Grand National Party。

The highest-ranking committee member in the Grand National Party, Huh Tae-youl, said, "Many people said that it is good (for Lee) to wear glasses."

Other lawmakers agreed。

Employees at the Blue House also said, "Glasses make the president's sharp image much gentler."

The Asian Economic Journal said that wearing glasses has helped change Lee's image among South Korean people. The late former South Korean presidents, Roh Moo-hyun and Kim Dae-jung, had done facial beauty treatments while in power。

As the high praise for the glasses appears widespread, consultants in the president's Blue House suggested that Lee wear glasses when there is a need to show his gentle side。

Opponents said, however, that wearing glasses will weaken the leaders' charisma。

Crystal Veil 21 Dec 2011, 18:07

I agree!

ChrisB 21 Dec 2011, 17:57

In the context of ES's now more visible public profile:

I'd like to express the following opinion again, and continue the discussion on the new site.

Optical obsession (sexual attraction/ admiration of persons wearing spectacles) is not implicitly fetishistic.

There are fetishishtic aspects to it, just as some people have fetishistic attractions to shoes/feet.

That attraction is objectifying in nature.

WHen we OOOs admire a pretty girl/boy/woman/man its because the glasses have made that individual seem more attractive than they might otherwise be without the glasses.

Attraction to the glasses is fetishistic only when its removed from the context of the wearer.

There is then a well documented reason why we (whatever percentage of the population we are) respond to someone wearing glasses.

Its the imposition of symmetry or the illusion of symetricality on the underlying image.

There are well documented studies to be found, including on Youtube that prove symetrical faces are regarded by that % of the population as more attractive than asymetrical faces.

Chris

ehpc 08 Nov 2011, 17:51

Good Samhain? :)

nickweymouth 08 Nov 2011, 16:29

congrats pete well done

ehpc 08 Nov 2011, 13:23

I know............'off-topic'..........but just to say I went on a mega-diet in 2010 and am now 36 pounds lighter than I was at my heaviest and I am now genuinely slim. Women tell me I look 15 years younger than I did (I am 57) and definitely I receive much more flirtatious behaviour and nice 'I like you' looks from women. A big difference. What a 'girlie' conversation :) It's true though.

Soundmanpt 08 Nov 2011, 12:47

Millhouse

Your right, don't complain. Like you I don't look anywhere near my age. I used to think it was people just being nice but since it happens all the time I now am sure I really don't look my age. Not a problem, the hell with women my age, bring on those younger ladies. I am 63 but am told that I look to be in my 40's. In my case I think it has to do with being a bit over weight as that kinda gives me a baby face and no wrinkles at all. If I were to lose weight I probably would look 93.

Millhouse 08 Nov 2011, 09:41

- Soundmanpt.

Yes, I think you may well be right after giving it some thought, I myself have noticed so many 18-25 gwg's now that it is def a cultural shift with eyewear in society, where as you point out the 40's plus seem to feel it damages their looks (not for all of us though of course)

Wurm did say a while back , if I recall "glasses are now the norm and acceptable" or words to that effect.

- Crystal Veil

I'm quite a young looking 48 yo which can be annoying at times as ladies my own age (or a bit older, ie, 50-55 for example)see me as a bit young. I know I shouldn't complain.

I think I will stick to the "real world" where dating or meeting ladies is concerned and let attraction and the natural course of events take it's place.

That way mutual attraction is instinctive in social settings rather than the "shopping list" of online dating & speed dating etc.

Crystal Veil 04 Nov 2011, 17:17

Millhouse,

I had the same experience when dating in my 40's. But the good thing was that I never needed to wait long before a

gorgeous lady in glasses came into my life - not at a dating event but in "real life". Things change when you are dating in your 50's. Many women return to glasses because of dry eyes, but also because minus glasses (or strong plus glasses) conceal their crow's feet.

Soundmanpt 04 Nov 2011, 12:36

Millhouse

I am only making a wild guess, but I wonder if that age group is more old school. They are likely of the believe that glasses aren't attractive to men and feel they have a better chance of meeting someone if they don't wear glasses. I would bet at least half or more needs and has some type of vision correction. No insult meant but i would bet at those kinds of speed dating affairs it might be different now that more young ladies are much more comfortable wearing glasses as much for fashion as need.

Millhouse 04 Nov 2011, 11:51

I have recently been to two speeddating events (having been single for a while it seems to me a good way to maybe meet a new gf) Also of course gwgs would get my "tick"! ..or so thought.

At both events, which had about 20 ladies & guys at each, I met not one lady wearing glasses!

The age range of the event was 35-49.

So then, either there were a lot of contact lens wearers or some had concealed there eyewear in the handbags?

Has anyone else noticed this sort of thing- like on blind dates, singles events etc?

varifocals 06 Aug 2011, 13:35

Bullies.ASTRA I know of 2 ladieswho have been badly affected by school bullies who use this chat room.

Years earier at schoolthere was a lovely & pretty girl with lovely curly hair but had strong lens, was cross eyed, & was badly bullied having her glasses snatched off her & she was left in tears as she could not see & was very frightened.It happened at least twice.

Luckily she hadavery loyal & tough friend who was nicknamed carrot & had a strong temper, was very upset as these bullies ran off with the glasses which luckily were found, but Ivy , the victim was badly frightened, as her vision was very poor..

I looked afterIvy while carrot & her friends hunted for the glassses which werehanded back to the sobbing Ivy. This happened at nursery school in liverpool.

Revenge came later when the bullies were locked in the school toilet & jeared at when released by the school caretaker.

Bullies dont like taking their own medicine.

Astra 02 Jul 2011, 21:04

Gerald_W,

I suppose it depends on the place you live in.

Bullies towards glasses does happen in some schools , I have encountered some of them .

Much of the cause is the lack of knowledge about glasses in some people.

Cactus Jack 02 Jul 2011, 10:13

Gerald_W,

I did not see it, but I know of an instance where it really happened in Brazil, several years ago.

One of our teen age members, who was born without crystalline lenses, had his glasses jerked off and broken in a school incident. Without crystalline lenses, he has to wear bifocal glasses with a sphere Rx of around +32 and very high prism. His glasses have to be made by Bausch and Lomb in Germany using optical glass lenses. He has learned to deal very effectively with his visual situation, but he has very limited peripheral vision as is common with high + glasses.

One day, he was walking down the hall at his school and a predatory school bully - no other description fits - came up behind him, pulled of his glasses and broke them. I believe the perpetrator was expelled, but I don't know if any financial penalties were demanded to pay for the very expensive glasses.

Soundmanpt 02 Jul 2011, 09:50

Gerald_W

Don't know about the bully thing, but the losing or having one's glasses stolen can happen. Many years ago even before I had much of an interest in glasses a girl I knew rather well. Her and and her girlfriend went to a public swimming pool. They both drove themselves there. The pool provided a basket for your clothes while you were swimming. Both girls wore glasses and left them in the basket while swimming. When they finished swimming and went to change they found that there glasses were gone. Not only theirs but many others as well. The 2 of them thought they could see well enough to drive home without glasses. They left driving off in different directions. The other girl was fine and made it home okay. My friend only got a few blocks away and decided she couldn't see well enough to go any further. She called me to come get her. I called a friend so we could get her car as well. Later years I came across many that had glasses taken during gym class etc.

Gerald_W 02 Jul 2011, 06:49

A recurring theme in glasses fantasies is a person losing her glasses or having them taken away, feeling helpless without them etc.

I have always wondered how realistic that scenario ist. In my life I have never seen a person losing glasses and I can't remember the provervial school bully stealing someone's glasses.

Has anyone ever seen that happen?

Gerald

hooked 30 Jun 2011, 02:29

Astra, I agree to your comment. But I didn't post it especially for the audience of this forum.

It also works the other way round for those who don't want to accept glasses or any kind of corrective eyewear.

Astra 29 Jun 2011, 13:04

nicely said, but it may be a little off the desire of some fetishist.

hooked 29 Jun 2011, 09:21

I have found that in the net:

"I wear glasses for the usual, practical and normal reason of refracting light before it enters my eye to make up for the inadequacies of its own focal length."

Nicely said.

Astra 27 Jun 2011, 07:54

Re: 23 Jun 2011, 14:49

Despite the close work expected during their study ,

There are doctors using plus lenses instead of minus.

However, it's notable that more than 20 % of Americans nowadays need minus correction .

Possibly, due to the changed nutrition and environment over the recent 50 years.

Astra 23 Jun 2011, 16:15

Melyssa,

Regardless if he was an O.D. or not ,

He didn't seem to aware of the structure of eyes or physiology of humans .

but note, it was year 1969 and he was age 75 ; he may not be able to keep abreast of the relevant research because of his possible reluctance to those findings.

He rely solely on his own experience instead to explain the phenomena he had observed.

Melyssa 23 Jun 2011, 14:49

And if he is/was a doctor, he would have had to do LOTS of close work in school and on the job. Of course, I wish he had been able to convince teachers not to give out so much homework. :)

Astra 23 Jun 2011, 14:30

Melyssa,

That O.D. certainly lived in his own fancy world, his life was mostly , interviewing clients, offering suggestions or some modifications to clients.

He would not bother to do more close work because of that. That may explain why he can view so negatively towards corrective glasses.

He never aware, for most people, close work are part of their life. Writing, sketching are enjoyable activities for them .

Most people would never mind they develop some myopia , and need to wear glasses because of excessive close work they did when they were young (below age 25).

Melyssa 23 Jun 2011, 09:56

Astra,

If that O.D. guy (and I don't necessarily mean Doctor of Optometry by "O.D.") really said all that diatribe, and he's still alive 42 years later, he'd better not meet up with the Glasses Girl. He'd change his mind forthwith. :)

Astra 23 Jun 2011, 01:14

http://www.i-see.org/eyeglasses_harmful/chap6.html

Q. WHAT DOES THE WORD "BOOKWORM" COVER?

A. The word "bookworm" covers the reading of too many books, newspapers, magazines, prayer books in church, comics; writing, drawing, sketching, coloring, keeping stamps and coins, picking at fingers, manicuring the nails, boys making model airplanes and boats, girls cutting out paper dolls, crocheting, knitting, sewing, etc., all incorrectly.

Astra 17 Jun 2011, 07:13

Then, there can be behavioral influence.

A child imitate their parents.

Melyssa 17 Jun 2011, 07:10

Astra,

I did lots of reading when I was younger, at home and in school, and at home especially when there was nothing good on any of the three TV channels back then.

Then again, when one has parents and grandparents whose vision is less than stellar, ...

Astra 17 Jun 2011, 04:01

Re: Melyssa

As far as I know , over-accommodation is the major cause of myopia.

My previous post are showing some habits that cause myopia. But the leading cause is probably, spending time on reading or some other close work .

Melyssa 16 Jun 2011, 06:49

1. Sit too close to the television: I hardly ever did (and we did not get a color TV until I was the ripe old age of 15.5).

2. Read with a flashlight (torch)under the bedcovers at night: I never cared to read in bed -- still don't. ;)

3. Experiment with eye-crossing for fun: A few times shortly after I started wearing glasses to see the difference.

4. Wear anyone else's glasses: Back then, glasses were nothing to brag about either as a necessity or a fashion statement.

5. RX now at -9.00: Well, something went wrong!

Astra 16 Jun 2011, 01:27

I think it's not a horror.

Sure these habits can change eyesight if a child (not an adult) do it daily.

Re: Portia 10 Jul 2002, 00:03

"Sarah, depending on when, where and by whom one was raised, children were frequently blamed for their eye defects in the past.

Does anyone else remember being told as a child not to:

Sit too close to the television

Read with a flashlight (torch)under the bedcovers at night

Experiment with eye-crossing for fun

Wear anyone else's glasses

All of the above I recall having heard as a child, the implication being that if one did any of the dastardly acts listed above, one would (horror of horrors) end up having to WEAR GLASSES. This was punishment for not taking care of your eyes. "

hooked 02 May 2011, 14:30

If I had one wish free in my life (until now) it would be the following:

When my wife told me she wanted to try contacts I should have opened my mouth. After she had them and I told her that I had had preferred her in glasses she told me: "Why didn't you make up your mouth before now I ordered them and will try them."

In the meantime (20 years later) she is completely back in glasses.

It looks like that I'm a happy guy if there aren't wishes which are more important than the one mentioned like health, money and so on.

Wurm 08 Apr 2011, 18:16

I think you're right that it's probably rich vs poor. I'd imagine some cities have hipsters in planos gentrifying the same neighborhoods where bunches of school kids are squinting to see the boards.

James 08 Apr 2011, 14:51

Wurm - your synopsis was much better than mine (should've made more effort) - the thesis was all about rich vs. poor, nothing to do with East vs West

Wurm 08 Apr 2011, 11:11

Full version of the Freakonomics glasses podcast can be found at:

http://freakonomicsradio.com/smarter-kids-at-10-bucks-a-pop.html

Wurm 08 Apr 2011, 11:06

Heard a clip from this on another podcast. In the clip they were contrasting the stigma of wearing glasses in some developing countries (such that some agencies can't even give away free glasses to many kids that need them as the parents deny necessary permission) with the fad for wearing plano glasses in many highly developed areas.

James 08 Apr 2011, 05:47

The latest freakonomics podcast is all about glasses, and investigating stigma attached to wearing glasses across Western and Eastern cultures.

http://freakonomicsradio.com/i-can-see-clearly-now.html

All4Eyes 27 Sep 2010, 13:09

Katy: BTW, how do you pronounce your name, if you don't mind my asking? I have a cousin Katy (who is cross-eyed, BTW) who pronounces it "Katie" but I realize it could be pronounced "Catty" also.

Mark 21 Sep 2010, 15:54

Hey Katy,

My own personal experience of having myodiscs has been mostly broken down into 1 of the following:

Seen from distance, people dont tend to notice that they're different, therefore no comments, no looks etc.

Seen from close up (strangers), get a few looks, but that could just be attributed to the usual few you find when your around that dont look at the ground but instead stare at everyone that they pass. As my power got higher, i found maybe a few more looks, only ever got 1 comment from a stranger who turned out to be wearing contacts but had heard about myo's and would need them soon. (we were in a queue waiting and just struck up a convo)

Seen from close up (family + friends): Found that most people that you know over time will notice them at some point, but I get very few questions, one person thought that the centre part was a normal lens and the carrier was to help me with my peripheral vision. When i first got them, friends asked, told several at once the answers to the few questions, and after that it wasnt brought up again.

I think myo's are made out to be a lot worse than they actually are. I would personally recommend them for anyone with an RX over about -12 (when i got my first ones), they give very good vision and hardly take any time to get used to.

My thoughts, hope they help

Katy 21 Sep 2010, 15:16

Hi Phil, yes you can think of something if you like! I have 3 pairs on the go and two that need lenses putting in and I haven't got round to it. All -2 & cyl. Also I have my eye on these in tortoise: http://www.coolframes.com/?fid=10831 but need to save up!

Katy 21 Sep 2010, 12:39

I am interested to know what reactions myodisc wearers have from people about their glasses. Do people notice they are different to regular glasses. I guess with blended myodiscs it could be difficult to tell though?

Phil 21 Sep 2010, 03:33

Hello (real) Katy. I'm very intrigued about the name under which you might re-invent yourself. Are you open to suggestions? We haven't chatted for ages. What frames and lenses are you wearing nowadays?

Katy 20 Sep 2010, 16:32

Just to avoid confusion, the Katy below (& in other threads recently) is not the one who has been around for a few years (me!) but a new one. No problem, I will post as something else, had been thinking I should change it to something other than my real name (oops!) :-)

Cactus Jack 20 Sep 2010, 12:29

That one works. I think it was the "." at the end that messed it up.

Cactus Jack 20 Sep 2010, 12:28

Lets try again the link in the previous post didn't work

http://www.ecpmag.com/1webmagazine/2010/05may/content/far_side/optical-fetishes-psEYEchology.asp

Cactus Jack 20 Sep 2010, 12:26

Here is an interesting link from the Yahoo Groups GOC site for those who wish to get the help of an Eye Care Professional (ECP) for GOC or Inducing Myopia.

http://www.ecpmag.com/1webmagazine/2010/05may/content/far_side/optical-fetishes-psEYEchology.asp.

You might want to copy the article and show it to a reluctant ECP.

Wie 27 Aug 2010, 11:02

post deleted - spoof, troll, multiple usernames

Ernest 26 Aug 2010, 08:44

BillyE,

What was your prescription before going fulltime? I find not many people resort to "pulling eyes" to see. In what kind of situations did you do that? I had a school mate who used to do that all the time to read the board and even to watch tv! We called it zooming.

BilyE 26 Aug 2010, 02:29

The last post was me.

26 Aug 2010, 02:28

I find the discussion about vanity and wearing glasses really interesting. When I was a teenager I thought I looked better without glasses and that was one of the reasons why I wouldnt wear them, even when common sense dictated that I really should. Looking back, I realise that I would have looked better with a well-chosen pair of glasses than going round with my eyes screwed up most of the time or pulling the corner of my eye in an attempt to get things into focus. The point was brought home to me a week or so into wearing glasses when I had to get my photo taken for my student ID card. I wasnt totally used to them, so Id taken them off, but the guy taking the photo said something like: Id put your glasses back on for the picture, because youre really squinting. A few weeks ago, a mate loaded up a few old pictures to his facebook account. Most of them were before I wore glasses and I think I look really bad : in most cased my eyes look kind of glasses or are half-shut. Theres only one in the album when Im wearing glasses and I think that thats the best of the lot. I see now it was a false vanity not to wear my glasses when I really needed them.

And 25 Aug 2010, 16:01

My gf is certainly not vain but always prefers contacts to glasses, even though she lokks great either way.

Clare 25 Aug 2010, 15:57

Katy - thanks, I feel vindicated in my decision ;)

Melyssa 25 Aug 2010, 14:56

Katy,

Thank you for listing the meanings of vain. I wanted to make sure I didn't miss any. :)

Actually, I've never had that opportunity since turning 16, as I've had to wear glasses all the time, and I could never wear contacts. My theory is, "Love me, love my glasses."

Katy 25 Aug 2010, 13:24

Clare - I don't think you're vain at all! Most women care about how they look (that's normal, not vain) so whether you want to wear glasses or not is up to you and how you feel most comfortable.

This is the definition of vain from a dictionary:

"cocky, conceited, egotistical, haughty, narcisstic, proud, self important"

Surely that doesn't apply to everyone that doesn't like wearing glasses!! I think the vain label stems from the days when glasses were ugly and functional, NEVER a fashion accessory and contacts were non existant or difficult to wear. But still nowadays I hear this vain label being trotted out when someone doesn't want to wear glasses. Very strange.

I definately think glasses can enhance appearance and be a fashion accessory. I guess some people will suit glasses more than other though. Much as I like glasses, I really hate people being called vain if they don't want to wear then, as there's plenty of reasons besides being obsessed by your own appearance!!

Clare 24 Aug 2010, 15:37

Katy - predictably, I'm very much with you on that! I'm not sure what it is that makes it a *vain* choice because there are possibly a number

- prescription makes it difficult to correct properly with glasses

- don't like something on your face/uncomfortable

- feel unattractive - thought that could be construed as 'vain'!

- play lots of sport or work in a field where contacts are impractical

I've heard the word vain used where people need reading glasses and I guess that's an age thing, but I don't really get why not wanting to wear glasses becomes derogatory rather than just impractical.

I think glasses look great if well chosen, I just don't feel that they suit me so I must be vain. On the train tonight a teenager proved how great they can look - a plus prescription, square frames with purple arms and deep pink fronts looked sensational with what she was wearing proving that, with a little confidence, it's possible to make glasses an accessory. Now how do we get that ... ?

Katy 24 Aug 2010, 13:29

Now much as I like glasses I really get annoyed when the word "vanity" is used (usually by men I think) if someone is reluctant to wear glasses.

Is someone being "vain" if they choose to wear trendy designer glasses rather than a low cost, basic, functional frame??? After all the basic frame does the same job so surely spending lots of money on an expensive frame is pure "vanity"?

Or does "vain" just apply to people that don't want to wear glasses...........

All4Eyes 28 May 2010, 21:22

Soundmandpt: You have a good memory, I do indeed have a -4 rx.

soundmanpt 28 May 2010, 20:51

All 4 eyes

Are you sure you didn't write that story? It does sound like you. As we all know you like guys in glasses and you like wearing your own glasses. The big difference is you actually need yours, -4.00 if I recall?

Wei 21 May 2010, 00:07

I see of, yes, mysodisc! So is of lens?

Astra 20 May 2010, 23:37

All4eyes,

thanks for sharing. nice essay.

All4Eyes 20 May 2010, 23:02

This girl could be my twin (in spirit anyway):

http://halfempty.com/wp/1999/05/i-make-passes-at-those-who-wear-glasses/

Channing 31 Mar 2010, 10:53

Results to my second survey on http://myopicgirls.com

Questions: What attracts you about a girl (or a guy) in glasses?

Her Lenses (17%)

Her Frames (11%)

Her Vulnerability (11%)

Her Beauty/Looks/Style (19%)

Her Interaction With Glasses (9%)

Her Eyesight Getting Worse (15%)

Her Eyewear habits (5%)

Her Eyes Focusing Through The Lenses (10%)

All4Eyes 31 Mar 2010, 00:35

Onlooker: It sounds like your wife can be fairly open-minded, especially during moments of high excitement. Next time she asks for something extreme, you might want to throw it out there and see how she reacts.

soundmanpt 23 Mar 2010, 09:41

Jennifer

I really hope so. It would change the mind set of the young ladies that think they can only be attractive wearing contacts. Let one girl compete in a beauty contest and a wall will come down.

As you say more and more celebs are wearing glasses when there out and about, but they still seem to refuse to be seen walking the red carpets at movie opening and awards shows. A few shots into the audinence will show a few wearing glasses.

Even a few have had to resort to wearing them to present an award because they couldn't read the prompter from the stage.

Jennifer 23 Mar 2010, 08:30

We've also been seeing a trend of more and more female celebraties coming out wearing glasses. Yes, girls wearing glasses is becoming more trendy. We may just see a girl in a beauty contest wearing glasses part time, at least.

-20 21 Mar 2010, 19:28

Eyeglasses for girls:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8KhhWKW3bgo

ehpc 21 Mar 2010, 10:35

diva - but you've got there in the end :) COOL XXX

Eyestein 21 Mar 2010, 02:32

Yeah. I'm right with you soundmanpt.

diva 21 Mar 2010, 02:04

ehpc: hehe it's taken a while ...

ehpc 20 Mar 2010, 16:15

In fact it is the frames that do everything really. Providing the lenses are minus.

ehpc 20 Mar 2010, 16:14

Huge 1980s frames tops:) CR39 lenses good too, but it is the hot frames where it is really 'at'.

soundmanpt 20 Mar 2010, 07:00

Eyestein

I think we will see it happen, I am seeing more and more young girls that really enjoy and want to wear glasses even if there not needed. I would think that in the early rounds of competition there have been a few that would have worn there glasses only to have officals talk them out of it. Sorry but it may be way past my lifetime before NJS gets his wish. I am not against it just that it will have to come in small steps. I would be happy to see someone in competition with even a very mild rx and thin lenses at this point.

NJS 20 Mar 2010, 03:35

There should be a Miss High Myopic Sex Goddess contest. One of the conditions is that all contestants wear huge 1980s style frames with CR39 lenses. Another condition is that only those women with myopia of -10 and above are eligible.

All this is making my pants baggy.

Eyestein 20 Mar 2010, 01:03

One thing I would really like to see before I die is a Miss Universe, Miss America, or Miss UK who wears glasses in public and during competition. Will it ever happen?

soundmanpt14 19 Mar 2010, 19:39

Luv2c4i

That is exactly what I mean. If they are wearing glasses backstage or when sight seeing it would seem that these ladies wear glasses full time except in competions. Also think how many others are most likely wearing contacts. With the way these ladies have been preceived over the last few years as air heads you would think someone would get brave and leave their glasses on to compete. At least they would look beautiful and maybe be taken serious. I think the judges would give points just for the look. Kinda like the hot girl in school that wears glasses compared to the hottie without glasses. Which one would you automaticly think the smarter of the two?

ehpc 19 Mar 2010, 09:39

Those views sound good..................:)

luv2c4i 19 Mar 2010, 09:14

Occasionally, there will be a "Behind the Scenes" clip on the Miss America broadcast (or even an entire "backstage" show) and eagle-eyed viewers will sometimes see this or that contestant wearing her glasses during a rehearsal or at another 'non-public' portion of the pageant. Such sightings, however, are never capped and displayed.

ehpc 19 Mar 2010, 08:59

You are a fount of sound sense, Diva. Now you love being GWG that is :)

Melyssa 19 Mar 2010, 07:46

There should be a "Miss Glasses America" (or "Mrs. Glasses" for us married women). Instead of preaching for "world peach" as Soundmanpt so aptly put it, I'd want to help the world by having it so that anyone can have pair of plastic-frame glasses in his/her own prescription for a phenomenal nominal fee. "Get thee glass eyes, and like a scurvy politician seem to see things thou dost not." -- King Lear, Act IV, Scene VI.

diva 19 Mar 2010, 00:05

*agrees very much with ehpc*

ehpc 18 Mar 2010, 15:50

Hope you got a good haircut, Clare:)

ehpc 18 Mar 2010, 15:49

Miss Alaska was in all likelihood not a 'beauty contest'.

Clare 18 Mar 2010, 12:41

Soundmanpt - I think that's a really interesting point. If, one day, someone considered 'technically' beautiful through acclaim such as a beauty contest - though they seem a bit old fashioned today - may help break down the few remaining barriers. I know that I'm a fine one to comment on this subject, but I think that wearing glasses for the young generation is far less of an issue than it was for my parents who saw it as some sort of disability, or something disfiguring. I've spent too many hours in a hair salon this afternoon where I thought it was unusual to see a young, attractive, female stylist wearing low minus glasses; she obviously takes a lot of pride in her appearance and it's good that she feels that glasses don't have a detrimental effect. Maybe that's just one small example but as a trend it would seem that more recognition of 'attractive' people wearing glasses can only add to the general acceptance of glasses as just another accessory.

But, of course, you need the right frames to carry it off!

soundmanpt 18 Mar 2010, 09:34

I'm sure this is the right thread for this, but something I was just thinking about. I just left a comment about Sarah Palin on the "News Personality" thread and remembering that she was Miss Alaska a few years back. Now as we know she is only ever seen wearing her famous glasses, never seen without. My thought is with so many people and more women than men now wearing correction, how many of the ladies competing to be Miss America do you think needs vision correction? Based on the number of young females that I know only a very few don't need glasses or contacts. I would be surprised if they were told that if they need correction they must appear on stage wearing glasses only about 5 or less would be bare eyed out of the 50 ladies.

Along with that thought it makes me wonder how far an attractice girl could go if she did wear her galsses throughout and showed she also had half a brain with a smart answer abiut world peach or same sex marriage issues. It would be cool to see a girl wearing glasses be crown as Miss America. Think what that would do to cause women to be glasses wearers.

These thoughts may keep me awake tonight just thinking about it. Oh well who knows, it could happen. Please!!!

OnLooker 01 Feb 2010, 00:38

My wife knows about my glasses fetishism and she has finally accepted that fact and started wearing glasses especially in our private moments especially when we have sex... Now, she's just a +1 hyperope and doesn't need glasses other than for reading and close work. It's obvious that i do need much more of stronger glasses... She has very recently asked me, while we were really hot, to ask her to do anything EXTREME and she'd do it for me!! I tried a couple of hardcore stuff but she said that's nothing extreme. My EXTREME is to get her wear very thcik and strong glasses during sex. Do you think i should go ahead and tell her that i can arrange for a strong pair of - or + glasses or even go further suggesting GOC during those moments to have the effect of helplessness without the strong glasses...I would like to avoid that at some stage she starts criticizing me or thinking of me as being a "sexually obsessed" or "deviant"...

Raybanz 14 Sep 2009, 18:24

I'm not sure where to put this posting, so here goes... I have a large collection of frames fitted with minus lenses (up to -10). I would like to find some people to model them so I can use the photos on a future web site. Is there anyone living in the south of England who might be interested in doing this, and the opportunity to try on lots of glasses with different scripts in the process?

Compactness 03 Sep 2009, 07:59

Re Clare's earlier post: I remember for several times in my life (I am now 25), mostly in my sixth form, I dreamed of some of my friends/teachers who usually wear glasses had stronger minus prescription than his/her actual ones, then I got awake because of the amazement and the underlying fear.

In fact I dislike seeing others wearing really thick lenses, say thicker than 6-7 mm at the outer edge.

Wearing Very low prescription lenses seems more like funny for me, but thick lenses gives me a feeling of fear, I mean, thick lenses (not thick frames) are heavy. Especially when I was at sixth form, I have first heard of the distortion of corrected vision as well as risk of retinal detachment amongst strong myopes. Though by no means I fear those nowadays, I tend to have some negative impressions about such thick lenses.

I seem to associate thick lenses to low corrected acuity, because I have once looked through a 1cm thick -10 lenses in a sixth form physics lab sessions, and I was puzzled at the diminishing image, back then I thought, how could one seeing such significantly diminished image clearly? No wonder back then I have heard about strong myopes frequently encountered distortion in their corrected vision.

Compactness 03 Sep 2009, 07:35

Re Danbert, Clare: For driving 20/20 acuity would be preferred and it is expected to correct low acuity to 20/20, but certainly not for normal occasions where 20/100 vision would be still tolerable. For -2 to -3 range, I assume the acuity without glasses for distance would be around 20/200 to 20/300 for some luckier ones without astigmatism or other visual defects, probably can't read large text beyond 1 metre. I heard such acuity would be considered as partial blind if cannot be corrected, so I guess there must be serious need of glasses for more than -2.

Compactness 03 Sep 2009, 06:17

Re mattp: Some individuals just turns out to be obsessed with glasses, regardless of prescription or whatever. More frequently (but obviously not all of them) for parents who wears glasses, it seems.

mattp 02 Sep 2009, 10:38

Here's an interesting twist on low RX full time wearers--We have some new neighbors, both parents significantly nearsighted (-4 or -5 or so) who obviously always wear glasses. The nine year old son also wears them with a negligible minus RX and no apparent astigmatism. What's interesting is he always has them on, just like his parents, even though he must see pretty well without them. In the pool, playing--always in glasses. And, because he is short (being nine), he looks over them a lot; when he does, his parents tell him to push them up his nose!! The kid never objects--just wears them. What gives here--interesting parental love of, or obsession with, glasses? I can't believe there's a medical need for the glasses. Or maybe the kid likes wearing them??

Danbert 02 Sep 2009, 05:16

@Compactness: If someone has an Rx then they're not 'cheating' anyone by wearing correction. Even a prescription of only -0.75 amounts to a level of acuity deemed inadequate to drive a car.

For most people, it's simply a matter of attaining crisp vision, not wearing glasses. I don't think you can judge others based on your own preferences.

As for people who wear plano lenses, I don't really understand why someone would do that, but again, that's their choice and not my place to judge.

Clare 01 Sep 2009, 11:33

Compactness - I'm not sure you'd feel cheated if someone was wearing -2 ish, after all its still an Rx and I've learnt from this website that some people with what seems like quite low prescriptions actually have poor acuity without them. I can understand if you like higher prescriptions it might be disappointing but its better than plano.

Compactness 01 Sep 2009, 01:39

I wonder if anyone here felt like being cheated when seeing someone wearing glasses with a plano prescription or very low minus (less than -2), and thought gosh, what's the purpose for wearing such glasses?

Clare 19 Jul 2009, 10:16

Melyssa - not strictly but I have had dreams where I have seen friends in glasses, including those who do and don't wear them. And me too. I wonder what that means?

I think to dream of glasses means that you will see something with more clarity. Predictable enough I suppose.

Melyssa 19 Jul 2009, 08:35

Here's a good subject about psychology of glasses: Does anyone dream about wearing glasses with a frame you don't have, whether or not you wished you did in real life, or dream about seeing someone in a frame you would want to have in your own prescription? For me, if all that came true, I'd probably have 100 pairs by now. :)

John L 13 Jul 2009, 10:59

Rachel - didn't trip because of the varifocals - I had had them over two years by the time I fell over the other week. It was more a case of not looking where I was going! I may get either a new pair of glasses during the holidays or get the existing ones repaired. However, as I am in a contact lens scheme which provides me with three pairs of lenses each quarter I may go back to wearing the lenses more and coping as would anyone my age with reading glasses when at work. At home I do have an older pair of glasses which I am quite happy to ware and slide up and down as required - but I wouldn't wear them outside!

John

Rachel 13 Jul 2009, 02:29

John. Yours sounds like a classic case of a long-time myopic contact-lens wearer. It all happens at a certain age when you can't focus on things that are quite close, like reading and sewing and stuff. The problem is once your contacts are in, you can't pull them down your nose like you can with glasses to give you less minus. Once when my glasses were too strong I did this for quite a while until my eyes had fully adapted to them. But if you are older your eyes don't adapt the same. My aunt went back to glasses full-time, and with people who hadn't seen her in them before, it was like only a nine days wonder. It sounds like the same with you. Once the kids at school had got used to you in glasses, they thought you looked strange without them. I think its a good idea for you to go back to them again for the Autumn Term. But be careful with your Varifocals this time. They can take a bit of getting used to especially going down steps and stairs, LOL.

John L 11 Jul 2009, 06:37

Interesting to read Janet's comments about switching to full time wear from contacts.

Up to January 2007 I wore contacts nearly all the time except at home, though I would sometimes wear glasses when on holiday from work.

However, by January 2007 I was using "off the shelf" readers occasionally with the contacts as I was having difficulty seeing close up in poor light.

I mentioned this to my optician who said it was fine to carry on using "off the shelf readers" with the contacts.

However, as I felt my current specs then needed replacing I asked him to check me out for a varifocal pair.

He gave me a +1.5 to both eyes for increased to +1.75 for varofocals.

This was to an existing prescription of Sphere -5.00, Cyl -075, Axis -180 (right) and -4.75, Cyl -075 Axis -180 (left)

I continued with the contacts for a while but found myself wearing the glasses more and more then last September (2008) decided to start wearing the glasses for work as my near vision with the contacts was getting worse.

As a teacher I am used to comments from children on your appearance - but after a few days no one noticed.

Three weeks ago I tripped over a step and went flying fortunately I wasn't hurt, but my glasses flew off and I landed on them. The semi rimless titanium frames survived - but one of the lenses didn't and cracked!

With summer holidays approaching and other spending commitments I decided to go back to almost full time contact wear and avoid replacing the glasses or lenses (I am sure to need a greater plus to the varifocal element) until the autumn.

However, I am now quite dependent on the readers. When I stopped wearing the varifocal glasses and went back to contacts I received quite a few comments again at work asking me what happened to the glasses!

I'll probably get an eye test in the autumn and go back to the glasses for work keeping the contacts for some leisure time pursuits.

John

Millhouse 11 Jul 2009, 06:21

-Janet.

During most of the 1980's I wore contacts with a high degree of success. Ifound them great, comfy with excellent vision. However I got an eye infection and stopped wearing them for a week (for which I took a week off work and pretty well didnt go out, such was my fear of being seen with glasses!)When I got to wear my contacts again I could only manage a few hours at a time, a meeting with my practioner only confirmed my worst fears- that,as he put it:

"I'm afraid contact lenses are not suitable for your eyes anymore"

It seems that its quite common for peoples eyes to only tolerate 10-20 years of wear as we age.

Anyway, to cut to your comments, I had no choice, I ordered some new frames and I always remember my first night out in them, mostly people just said something like;

"Oh - I didnt know you wore glasses" etc. I did get though an admiring look from a lady who's gaze I caught in the pub that night,I smiled at her and she gave me a lovely charming look back.From that moment on I was ok in my glasses ! So then, my point, dont worry about your looks, choose a nice well suited frame you feel good wearing. Get a friend to give you an honest second opinion on your choice and go for it!Trust me-and others here will confirm this, there are many guys & girls out there that love GWGS.

Rachel 11 Jul 2009, 04:13

Janet. Melyssa's isa good idea. Lots of nice frames too these days.

Melyssa 10 Jul 2009, 12:44

Janet,

You can always go with regular bifocals, or progressives even, in a pretty frame. Then you won't have to worry about switching so many items.

Danbert 10 Jul 2009, 10:55

The few who don't wear glasses (such as me) who do notice the difference probably think they look fine either way, though personally I think minus lenses have the best look. I don't really know why; it's just my own opinion.

Finding some nice frames that suit you is the key if you're concerned about your appearance :)

Rachel 10 Jul 2009, 10:27

Janet. I think I agree with Charles. He's quite knowlegable on these matters actually. I don't think people who don't wear glasses know whether you are short sighted or long sighted to be honest. Just stick you specs on and go for it. Best of Luck

Charles 10 Jul 2009, 10:07

Janet,

I am sure you don't mean to and, no doubt, your view is probably quite common, but why does it matter whether you are nearsighted, farsighted or any other sort of '...sighted'. Nobody will like you less or think you are a freak. On the contary, far more people than you think will like the way you look in glasses. But, whatever, nobody is a lesser person for having defective vision, If they were, then getting on for 30% of the world would have to hang their heads in shame.

Rachel 10 Jul 2009, 08:28

Janet. My auntie wore hard contacts most of the time from the age of 19 until just recently. She's almost 30 now. They didn't stop her rx increasing though like she thought they might. Last year she was neding another increase and like you she was finding it difficult to read with her contacts in, so she decided to go back to glasses fulltime. She's now got some single vision glasses and also bifocals. Her husband doesn't mind in the least of course, but she found it a little bit daunting going out shopping and stuff and to places where no one realised she was short sighted for the first week or so, but then everyone simply accepted her in her glasses. It's made it easier for my little cousin who is now 5 to accept hers and they both go around together now wearing glasses all the time. Its the same when I go to stay. All three of us go around together with our glasses on.

And 10 Jul 2009, 08:20

Janet, what's your minus rx ? If folk are already seeing you in glasses of some kind they'll probably hardly notice that you start wearing full-time.

Rachel 10 Jul 2009, 02:04

Melyssa. This should be on Choosing Frames Thread. LOL. I'll go there to reply to you. Rach

minus 5 who luvs gwgs 09 Jul 2009, 22:40

Janet I was too vain to wear my glasses all the time I did not wear contacts obviously I had to wear them for driving etc eventually I got sick of squinting and as my eyes had got up to about minus 4 in my worst eye I just went for it result no comments at all you have the advantage of having worn readers frankly nobody will notice after all who but one of us knows the difference between plus and minus Go for it girl and do not worry at all

Janet 09 Jul 2009, 18:49

I'm wondering if anyone here has been an exclusive contacts wearer but has successfully made the switch to fulltime glasses? This is what I am aiming to do now at age 42(!)...but I have never really let the world know that I even am nearsighted in the first place. I've always worn glasses strictly late at night and early in the morning, in private at home. I wear disposable contacts by the way. Actually what has happened is that in recent years I have lost my near focusing ability pretty fast. I started with +1.50 for reading three years ago. I tried bifocal contacts and did not like them for whatever reason. I refuses to bother with monovision because the idea just did not sit well with me. So I've been wearing half readers over my contacts. The problem is that I'm at the point where I need my readers constantly (my add jut got bumped up to +2.00) and it is kind of getting ridiculous to wear both contacts and glasses much of the time. Even my husband is encouraging me to ditch the contacts. Maybe it is bizarre that I am ok with readers on my face or head, but for whatever reason I've always hid my nearsightedness and those minifying lenses...always felt self-conscious in them. I am trying to figure out a way to make the transition without getting too much attention from people.

ehpc 09 Jul 2009, 15:13

Just coming up 55 myself :) And Life has absolutely never been better :) And - believe me - the blondes keep coming................. :)

Melyssa 09 Jul 2009, 12:25

Rachel,

All I have for multi-colored frames are those that fade to clear in the middle or at the bottom, plus those red-to-pink hexagonal frames. As long as I don't wear a pink blouse and red skirt with it, it's fine. Of course, red and orange, or black and dark blue, or black and brown would be too much of a clash.

Rachel 09 Jul 2009, 11:16

Hollie. Well the brown frames will be perfect for you

Phil 09 Jul 2009, 10:28

Come on EHPC. At our age ANY blonde would be utterly fantastic, especially with minus lenses and bold frames!!

ehpc 09 Jul 2009, 10:02

Rachel - your colour preferences are PERFECT :) Colours have to be bold - bright red, electric dark blue etc Hollie - brown rectangualar plastic frames with wide sides, minus lenses, and blonde hair eh? :) Although I must say I like natural blonde :) Pete

Hollie 09 Jul 2009, 09:42

Rachel

Blonde...not natural : )

Rachel 09 Jul 2009, 05:54

Hollie. I agree a strong brown colour in a bold frames can look pretty good. It goes with blonde hair the best. Mine is brown so I think red looks nice, or red and black. Blue also goes with blonde hair. What colour is yours?

Puffin 09 Jul 2009, 01:59

I seem to be seeing black with silvery bits on a lot at the moment.

Hollie 09 Jul 2009, 00:34

Rachel

There are some very cool colour combinations. I decided to be boring and go for brown which go with most things! I tried on some red ones, but guess it depends on what colours you are wearing- red would clash with pink! : )

Rachel 08 Jul 2009, 22:30

Melyssa. Lots of the new frames are a combination of colours now, like red and black or something, which look really amazing. I've seen yellow and black as well. It depends what colour your hair is I think. Some of them are all pastel shades now like crystal blue. I can't really make my mind up which colour to go for in September when I have my next check-up.

Puffin 08 Jul 2009, 16:39

when large plastic frames were last in fashion, red always appealed to me.

ehpc 08 Jul 2009, 15:26

There are some great colours Rachel. I completely agree :) Although black is always special.............. :) Pete

Melyssa 08 Jul 2009, 12:37

Or a combination of colors.

Rachel 08 Jul 2009, 10:40

Pete. Thye don't have to be black frames these days. There are some new zany colurs out there.

ehpc 04 Jul 2009, 10:13

Too right I would, Rachel :) Especially if they were in black rectangular plastic frames with wide sides:) drool drool

Rachel 04 Jul 2009, 02:35

ehpc. I bet you would like it if I wore my CR39 all the time??

ehpc 03 Jul 2009, 09:45

Rachel - it woould be even better for me if I were doing the looking :) You are fun :) Pete

Rachel 03 Jul 2009, 08:57

Pete. Thanks, but you never know. LOL. It's a great feeling when you know people are really looking at you lenses.

ehpc 03 Jul 2009, 08:50

Rachel - Wow! Wish you'd bump into me :) I hope you have CR39s in your trendiest and smartest frames :) Pete

Rachel 03 Jul 2009, 01:13

ehpc. I agree Pete, but not everyone in my family does. Yes, I have had my old frames fitted with CR39 lenses as spares and some new frames fitted with hi-index lenses to please my mother in my current rx. However I always carry the spare pair with me, so I can pop them on whenever I feel like it. I often do this when I'm out on my own, because I love bumping into people I haven't seen for a while, knowing they are thinking "Wow how much thicker can Rachel's glasses get."

myofan 02 Jul 2009, 10:27

Rachel -- Thorfinn is -7.50 (Guys in Glasses, June 20)

ehpc 02 Jul 2009, 09:20

Stick with CR39 and have the thickest lenses possible for your correct prescription Rachel :) Do you have a pair of CR39s in your current hot prescription? Even the glasses you wear every day ? :) Pete

Rachel 01 Jul 2009, 22:59

Thorfinn. What rx are you? Or did I miss it. Yeah, I agree, standard CR39 lenses are pretty cool. The problem is when you get up to a pretty high rx the opticians like to push you into having high index for some reason.

Charles 23 Jun 2009, 00:06

Patrick B

We have both noticed over the past year or two what similar experiences we have relating to our myopia. Could we, perhaps, compare notes more fully by email? charlesanderton12@yahoo.co.uk

Galileo 22 Jun 2009, 08:04

I did some consultancy work in the optical industry some years ago and one of the things I remember from that was that high index lenses had more aberrations than low index, particularly at the edges. I don't wear high index glasses, but that is what the professionals I was working with said.

Thorfinn 22 Jun 2009, 07:52

I tried some high index lenses a few years back and found quickly that I did not like them. There seemed to be great deal of distortion the closer to the outside edges one looked. However, it is not the degree of distortion that comes with a bi-concave lens, but there is aberration nonetheless. I have liked best the normal index of the CR39 polycarbonate over other lens types.

Rachel 22 Jun 2009, 07:15

guest. I'm not sure I agree with that entirely. I have some low index and high index glasses both in my current prescription and I think the extra inside curve in the low index lenses make the distortion worse. Does anyone else think the same?

guest 22 Jun 2009, 02:09

A higher lens-index leads to worse color-distortion on the outside of the lens and also worse peripheral vision.

If you want to have a better peripheral vision, you have to choose low-index-lenses.

Rachael J 21 Jun 2009, 23:07

Hi Patrick B, thanks for your contribution about myodiscs. They are obviously something I am going to have to consider at some stage with such a high rx for my age. Like you say I still have some way to go yet but at the moment things seem to be progressing pretty rapidly, which can be slightly scary. I'm not at all worried really, but I don't know anyone personally who wears myodiscs to ask about them. So far I have shied off trying contacts, but I realise they are another option. I have always been more than happy wearing glasses, depite my mother's dislike for me in them. At least my dad is a bit more sympathetic. I am envisaging another increase in the autumn (September) of probably another dioptre they way things are going, which would push me up to RE- 12.75 & LE -13.50 (maybe even -14.00) because that is definitley my weakest eye. I also have some astigmatism. With some nice frames and high index lenses, I suppose my peripheral vision won't be too distorted to cope with will it?

ehpc 20 Jun 2009, 20:47

Should be 'I have never read..................'

Patrick B 20 Jun 2009, 17:02

Hi Rachel J - Charles is right about lenticular/myodisc lenses. I had them in the late 80s when my script was -17/-19 and I was wearing the larger frames popular back then. From there I went back to regular lenses in smaller frames. My last regular pair were when I reached -23/-24 (with some modest astigmatism). They were made in 1.7 high-index glass and very biconcave. This pair made me realize that I really couldn't see all that well anymore with glasses and it was recommended to go with the myos. My next pairs (myodiscs) were so much better since they sat closer to my eyes and there was so much less peripheral distortion. And they are so much better-looking cosmetically, even though they're clearly very strong. The blended myodisc bowl hardly shows when I've got them on and since I have negative carriers, I don't have the huge contrast between the negative bowls and the positive carriers which is why I didn't like my first pair way back when -- tiny eyes surrounded by giant crow's feet!! I'm now -27/28.5

You've still a long way to go, but it might be an option at some point. You'll find, however, that if you get contacts that they'll provide the best vision and the closest to 20/20

Good luck!

ehpc 19 Jun 2009, 13:40

Again, Wikipedia is written by AMATEURS. I have have read an article in it on anything that was not full of the most catstrophic misinformation.

Rachel J 19 Jun 2009, 10:55

Charles.

Thanks for the info. on myodiscs. Hopefully my rx won't get up into the -20.00s or my mum will go spare! I just hope I can stop somewhere between -15.00 and -18.00 or something like that. I'd be really happy with that. I'd have thick glasses, but hopefully my vision would be corrected fully to 20/20 as near as possible. I don't mind the peripheral distortion too much. In a way its kind of groovy. I know that sounds silly, but i think it is. lol

Charles 19 Jun 2009, 08:40

I put off wearing lenticular lenses (nyodiscs)for as long as I possibly could and so didn't start until I was somewhere around -22/23. I regretted it for about 6 hours! After wearing them for several hours, I tried my old ones again and realised that I should have lenticulars a couple of years earlier. As has already been said, distortion was much less and because the lenses could be much closer to my eyes, minification was slightly less. They were also a little lighter, although not a lot. At a time when my rx had reached, I think, -26.50 - 2.25 in my worst eye, I had standard lenses for my spare glasses. The difference by now had become considerable - in every way the lenticulars were far better - even, would you believe, in appearance.

Puffin 19 Jun 2009, 02:28

Depending on the frame, you might just start off with a line towards the side of each lens rather than a full myodisk circle - which might be not so noticable.

Rachel J 18 Jun 2009, 23:09

RL.

Thanks for the info. on myos. I have to say I'm not really sold on the idea of wearing them in public yet. It may mean changing from the optician I've been going to since I started with glasses which wouldn't be easy. None of my friends wear myos either, so I may get some flack if I got some. Like "how blind can she get." Even so I wouldn't mind getting some just to wear in private for a start and find out how I like myself in them. Or hate myself in them, lol. I'm still thinking about it.

RL 18 Jun 2009, 16:04

One other thing about myodiscs; I believe it is pretty hard to tell what the prescription is without really looking close and knowing what you're looking for. I suspect that -15 and -20 lenses would be hard to tell apart. This is good if you have -20 and don't want to look quite so myopic, but with -15, what do folks think?

RL 18 Jun 2009, 11:20

Rachel J, I got my first myodiscs at

-14 because that's when my regular glasses got to be over 12mm thick and that made them quite heavy. They are a bit hard to find these days, but the best ones I have came from Optical4Less.com. Their site is listed on the front page of Eyescene. They are made in 1.8 high index glass and are very thin and comfortable. Not cheap: 238.00 US, but worth it I think. Like I said, they look a bit exotic, but might suit you well.

Rachel 18 Jun 2009, 10:18

Phil, Wow, really, do you. That's encouraging.

Phil 18 Jun 2009, 08:26

I think they'd look incredibly sexy on a young woman!

Rachel J 18 Jun 2009, 08:19

RL. At what rx would you recommend I change to wearing myodiscs then, if I decide to try them? Would they look acceptable on a young person do you think? If they give sharper vision and less distortion than ordinary high index lenses, I am definitely interested. Also are they more expensive? I get a voucher towrads my glasses because I am still in full time education and also have what is classed as complex prescription.

RL 18 Jun 2009, 07:48

Rachel J, One thing about myodiscs is that if they fit close to your eyes (mine do) there is very little edge distortion because the edge of the bowl is so thin. That way, things at the edge don't appear to bend up and down when you nod your head. If you get the anti-reflection coating, the bowls are hardly noticible, and if the carriers are plus; they may be casually mistaken for plus glasses all around. Of course on closer inspection, the tiny eyes give away that the glasses are in fact a very strong minus.

Rachel J 18 Jun 2009, 01:46

RL. My current rx is R.E. -11.75 & L.E. -12.50 now, with -1.50 and -1.00 astigmatism, so maybe myodiscs are an option for me, although I think my mother would be horrified if she saw me wearing them at my age. You say you don't notice the little bowls if the glasses are kept close up to your eyes, but I was wondering what your peripheral vision was like with them. Mine is fairly distorted now with ordinary glasses, either with CR39 standard or high-index lenses, which I find quite annoying.

RL 17 Jun 2009, 07:54

Rachel J, Myodiscs are not really that bad. In fact they are the thinnest, lightest option past -12 or so. I have a couple of pairs and they fit very close to my eyes so I don't notice the edge of the bowls at all. Where my high index (1.74) -15 full field glasses are about 8mm thick at the edges, the myodiscs are less than 3mm and are very comfortable. They don't look bad; maybe a bit exotic.

Danbert 17 Jun 2009, 02:37

This may not quite fit in the Psychology thread but, I am curious as to what would necessitate the use of myodiscs. Of course, some people simply like them.

According to Wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myodisc), that usually-but-not-always correct source of knowledge, myodisc lenses are the cheapest option beyond -12 diopters and prescribed for high myopia in cases where money is an issue.

Other than that it says that it is not a "preferred" lens and that it is usually prescribed in cases of "near blindness," but it does not define what constitutes "near blindness."

So in summary:

1. What constitutes "near blindness" (with vision correction)

2. At what point and in what situations are myodiscs actually prescribed, ignoring any cost considerations?

Rachel J 17 Jun 2009, 02:03

Astra. To be honest not a lot. I think the high index are marginally better than CR39 standard lenses, because they are not quite as curved towards the edges. It's something you have to learn to live with with high minus glasses I reckon. At first it feels weird, but after a while your eyes seem to just look though what is clearest. I dread to think what it's like getting used to wearing myodiscs!

Astra 16 Jun 2009, 10:59

Rachel, does hi-index lenses help your peripheral vision?

Rachel 22 May 2009, 22:40

Peter. Having better vision is why I was condisering contacts. With my rx with my peripheral vision is quite distorted now with glasses especially with CR39 lenses. Maybe for sports and things contacts would be an option although I'm still a glasses girl at heart.

ehpc 22 May 2009, 12:50

You just keep on being top GWG Rachel.......................:) Pete

Peter 22 May 2009, 12:22

Rachel -- With a strong prescription, contacts do tend to offer vision that is better in some ways than with glasses. The peripheral vision is clearer; you can look in any direction and see clearly rather than just through the center of the lenses. I think it's worth trying, as there are times when it is nice to be able to see the world that way. But DON'T wear contacts for cosmetic reasons. The belief that glasses are a detraction cosmetically is silly and generally outdated (though with a strong Rx your options are narrower if you don't want the lenses to attract a lot of attention).

Rachel 22 May 2009, 08:37

ehpc. Well...urm it was just a thought seeing as my mother keeps going on about them. Don't worry too much, I still enjoy looking at the world through glasses.

ehpc 21 May 2009, 14:15

Rachel - you are the coolest of the cool and have the world's most perfect glasses. The thought of you trying CLs..........................oh no................aaaaaaaaaaaaaargh............

Clare 21 May 2009, 09:42

Phil - very surprised to hear that ;)

Rachel - I suspect at my Rx (-2.75 & -3) it makes no difference, it's just a cosmetic preference really. Though I'm sure someone here would have a view on how it benefits a higher Rx.

Rachel 21 May 2009, 06:02

Clare. I'm considering contacts not my rx has got so high. In your opinion do they give you a lot better vision than glasses? I suppose I'm going to have to give them a try if only to please my mother.

Rachel 21 May 2009, 06:00

Phil, Sorry to hear that! Keep posting here then and I'll try and reply.

Phil 21 May 2009, 01:35

Clare, Government IT is a disgrace: but don't start me on that! Oh, and by the way, you couldn't be further from the truth if you think your misconceived preference for contact lenses disgusts me! I find the fact that you are a reluctant glasses wearer just a little bit sexy!

Like Lenses 20 May 2009, 18:50

I,Glassesq

No, idea at all how thick they would be. However I had done the same request with an online optical shop, with a -1.50 prescription and knew that this pair would be even thicker.

Clare 20 May 2009, 11:23

Rachel - I generally avoid glasses by wearing contacts, much to the disgust of guys here of course ;)

Clare 20 May 2009, 11:21

Phil - oh yes, the IT I hear is even more scary in Government! New horizons might be being a financial consultant of some sort, of course it's a long shot in the current market but could provide a bit of international exposure and a breather from the London markets. Who knows, it's a funny old world but it's nice not to have to rise at 5am for a bit, just a little while ... ;)

Phil 20 May 2009, 10:33

Rachel, it's barred by the computer chaps here.

I, Glassesq 20 May 2009, 09:38

Like Lenses,

Before executing your order, did the optician give you an idea of the thickness, edge or othewise, of the lenses, either with or without the use of the thickening techniques?

Rachel 20 May 2009, 07:16

Phil. Why not? It's easy. Just register a name with with your password.

Phil 20 May 2009, 03:34

Rachel, I'd love to. But I can't access it! Do you do Facebook?

Rachel 20 May 2009, 03:19

Phil. I go in to Lenschat if ever you what to chat with me

Phil 20 May 2009, 03:14

Clare, So what are your new horizons? I'd love to be able to chat to you properly. I can't get on Lenschat here: IT police are awful in Government! Do try and fit me in for an hour next time you are up in town.

Rachel 19 May 2009, 23:27

Sorry Clare, I must have got my wires crossed! Are you ok now with glasses though like me?

Rachel 19 May 2009, 23:24

Menthe. Sure. I think my rx at 7 was getting on for -2.00, so I noticed a huge difference when I put on my first glasses. My mum's younger sister, who is now very near-sighted, started with glasses around the same age, so I guess my myopia comes from her. By the time I went to high school at just over 11, I remember seeing -4.00 & -4.50 written on my prescription and before I reached 13 I was desperate for stronger glasses again when I went up to over -5.00. From then on its been rapidly down hill all the way, but I still get that wonderful feeling I got when I put my first glasses on, each time I get stronger lenses. And needless to say I'm really looking forwards to my next increase.

Like Lenses 19 May 2009, 20:22

Clare

In addition to being CR39, I requested that they be as thick as possible, and have flat front surfaces. They must have used lense blanks for minus 5, or six, and that is why they look so strong.

Menthe 19 May 2009, 17:06

Rachel: You're the kind of girl that many of us gwg-loving men dream of! Can you give us a potted history of your glasses and the rising prescription from the age of seven when you got your first pair?

Melyssa 19 May 2009, 13:04

Add me to the list of people who did not want to wear glasses at an early age (8) either.

Clare 19 May 2009, 12:48

Rachel - I never wanted to wear glasses at all, it just happened! If this post was intended for another Clare (there is another but I think slightly differently), apologies ;)

Clare 19 May 2009, 12:47

Phil - nice to know that offer's still open. It's not that I'm at a loose end in London, more that my visits are rare enough that I have to pack as much in as possible! I thought I'd be missing the City but it looks like my horizons are broadening outside it. Not sure if that's a good thing or not!

Rachel 19 May 2009, 05:43

Clare, It's interesting to hear that you wanted to wear glasses from an early age. When I told my Mum I thought I needed some at 7 she thought I only wanted them because another girl in my class had just got some. Then when she discovered I really needed them she told me not to wear them a lot or my eyes would go worse. I suppose it was rebelliousness in me that made me wear then them as much as I could and feel happy when my rx kept increasing. Now I've got to the stage where I do anything to get stronger glasses because I love the sharpness and clarity so much.

Phil 19 May 2009, 05:41

Clare, Are you often at a loose end in London? That offer of coffee's still open!! Just hoped you might change youir mind now that you've a little more time on your hands!

Clare 18 May 2009, 23:47

Like Lenses - what is it that makes them look so strong? I have an old pair that are -2.25 and -2.75 that they made in CR39 and I remember being annoyed because the stronger lens stuck out from the frame. I don't think that they actually look stronger because of it though.

Like Lenses 18 May 2009, 19:38

Clare,

Yes several people have said that my new glasses look so strong.

Exactly the outcome I had hoped for.

Clare 18 May 2009, 14:03

Like Lenses - has anyone been so bold as to comment on your new strong prescription ;)

Sophie 18 May 2009, 13:30

sum1wholovesgirlswithglasses,

1. My current prescription is -4.50 LE, -3.00 RE

2. I think any man looks better wearing glasses, but I like men with moderate prescriptions in the -3.00 to - 6.00 best.

Like Lenses 18 May 2009, 12:34

I have recently had my -2.50 glasses made up with CR39 lenses with thicker lense blanks with flat fronts. They look really strong, and I certainly get more looks, and have more conversations struck up by women than when wearing the same prescription in high index lenses.

Jennifer 18 May 2009, 09:41

I would say that my strongest attraction to men, have been to those wearing glasses. I have to say it's more at a level of Lust than Love. For me a man in glasses is far superior to one without. Having said that...The man wearing glasses has to be handsome, nice personalty, etc. If his personality is terrible, then I loose interest very quickly. Let's just say the glasses are the "icing on the cake."

Interesting conclusion Millhouse about previous boyfriends and father's wearing glasses. I can say that neither apply to me. I truely belive it was my want to wear glasses from an early age. When I got glasses, then it was the want to have boyfriends who wore glasses, too.

And Sum1wholovesgirlswithglasses, I don't think we are as rare as you think.

Rachel 18 May 2009, 09:18

some1wholovesgirlswithglasses.

I am so pleased you do because I love wearing glasses. My current rx is RE-11.75 & LE -12.50 which is fantastic

sum1wholovesgirlswithglasses 18 May 2009, 07:49

sum1wholovesgirlswith glasses - I think your post was intended for any female visitor to Eyescene spot on Clare my questions were intended to any myopic/hyperopic girls on eyescene who likes/admire males in glasses:)

Clare 17 May 2009, 22:53

sum1wholovesgirlswith glasses - I think your post was intended for any female visitor to Eyescene, so here's my response:

1. My rx is -2.75 and -3

2. I like prescriptions in the moderate range on guys best. Definately has to look like they need them but that can be anything from -1.75 up I guess with the right lenses

Astra 17 May 2009, 13:41

sum1wholovesgirlswithglasses,

1. My current prescription L: -3.25 R: -3.25 , not sure about reading, as I read comfortably without glasses, not with the minus script.

2. No. I think most females look better in glasses than males. Perhaps because I am a gwg myself.

I prefer male with normal eyesight (acuity better than 20/20 without glasses/contacts), at least before his onset of presbyopia at around age 40. Even so, I don't prefer males in glasses/contacts.

sum1wholovesgirlswithglasses 17 May 2009, 08:26

VFL hope you do not mind asking 2 questions im just being curious since not a lot of women do take part on eyescene and females such as you or Jennifer are quite rare wigh high interest in vision sorry in advance if theyve been answered before by you 1.what's your current prescription (near or farsighted) 2.do you prefer males with weak moderate strong or extraordinarily strong prescriptions thanks:)

Melyssa 17 May 2009, 08:13

Millhouse,

As I posted 2 years ago this coming Friday, "Even though my motto was always 'Love me, love my glasses,' I wanted any man I dated to be interested also in my kindness, sense of humor, and Magna Cum Laude intelligence. (And having one who wears glasses doesn't hurt either.) Things definitely worked out well for me."

I was always more attracted to guys with glasses, and my husband always preferred women with glasses, probably because both of us have worn glasses since we were each in single digits age-wise.

VFL 17 May 2009, 07:49

It is not chance. Freud would have a field day with me. All of my serious relationships and crushes except for two have been with/for glasses wearing men. If a man doesn't need glasses it seems to me that something very fundamental is missing. I don't even try to question it anymore. I wear glasses/contacts myself and understand how they work. There is nothing all that magical about my own. It is my partner's eyewear (and this extends to contact lenses) that gives me a buzz.

Millhouse 17 May 2009, 04:55

I recently been reminiscing somewhat over some previous romantic relationships in my life and have noticed an occasional general theme that Im sure is not chance.

I will explain

I have a -7.00/ -6.75 prescription which over the years has remained (more or less) stable. Ive worn glasses since the age of 9 and so am quite confident wearing them and I cant get on with contact lenses of any sort as my eyes are just too dam dry. Im now 45 years old, of good looks (Im told) and in good shape.

As I mentioned I have been thinking of past girlfriends and noticed that in many cases, but not all, a previous boyfriend of theirs had worn glasses, and that after seeing me their new guy also had glasses. Also- there seemed to be a high incidence of their fathers wearing eyewear too (though that could be put down to age I guess)

My conclusion was that in these days of high contact lens wear among the myopic population that a some women ,either subconsciously or otherwise, are attracted to guys in glasses to a high degree and that by being a wearer a guy may become a scarce type of romantic commodity (so to speak)

Now, Im not one for night clubs and certainly dont go out on the pull so too speak- I just go out and enjoy myself as thats what seems to work for me romantically, my logic being that if a lady is attracted to me then she will let me know one way or another. Of course that scenario also can apply to guys who seek out female wearers as well I guess.

So. Does anyone concur with my thoughts?

Guys - have you experienced this at all?

Ladies - Do you notice that trait in your relationships?

ehpc 28 Oct 2008, 17:43

Blonde GWGs...........sigh....wearing minus lenses with black rectangular plastic frames with wide sides.................:)Perfect:)

Clare 28 Oct 2008, 12:40

BrooklynBoy - not quite the same as your experience but 4 years ago I got conjunctivitis so I couldn't wear my contacts. None of my colleagues knew I wore contacts and, though my prescription was only about -2.50, there were still some activities that I needed to see for so I was forced to wear my glasses. I was so nervous and it felt so strange, luckily I didn't dislike my glasses it just felt strange to be wearing them. I got loads of compliments and was told I looked serious - which is nice to hear when you're blond ;)

BrooklynBoy 28 Oct 2008, 06:16

You know, its funny how things happened. I have being wearing contact lenses for a long time now, but I cant wear them in front of people that I know. 99% of the time I just wear glasses inside the house. But, destiny played a joke on me this weekend. I ended up with an eye infection, a nasty one where I couldn't wear contact lenses on my left eye. Being a -5 on both eyes, many of you know that glasses or contacts are extremely necessary. And yesterday I had to get up early in the morning and put glasses on and go to the doctor like that. Good thing I took 2 days off so I could get better but it was funny being forced to wear glasses. Funny how I regret to don't spend that extra money on thinner lenses. My -5 glasses are more than a quarter of an inch thick and it really calls attention. It was fun though but I hope my eyes get better soon.... even though I found my self a little excited on being forced to wear glasses... go figure... any similar experiences?

lazysiow 02 Jul 2008, 23:13

VFL, I've never felt like a woman was checking out my lenses :( I would probably think she'd be finding excuses to go behind me so she could peek at them from the sides but I've only had a few who have checked out and complimented me but they were siting from the front.

VFL 02 Jul 2008, 04:33

All passion and emotion? Yes, a thousand trillion times yes!

I just don't want to get "caught out."

Eye contact shifts around. I guess I'm becoming paranoid.

Gosh by golly you guys in glasses make my knees weak. If you are having one of those days where you wonder if you are going to bother with the contacts or just go with specs... Go with the specs. Please. Just for me.

ChrisB 01 Jul 2008, 16:37

VFL,

I can answer your question in several guises.

If i am checking out a GWG whom I find attractive, and make eyecontact, its very rare that I do not get a smile. Occasionally I get ignored, and I suspect that the GWG in question has some other issues in her life that are not optically related. Very occasionally in these circumstances I have managed to engage the individual in conversation, to see if I can break through the problem.

When I did GOC and was more often a glasses wearer the % of sympathetic or positive responses seemed to be higher. But that is not to say it's inadequate now when I cant do GOC for lack of funds.

Cut-in UK 01 Jul 2008, 12:58

VFL, you are all passion and emotion, (thank God for it!) However, in simple terms, the fairly acute angle required to 'check out' power rings means that they can't see YOU when you're looking at.

(Where have you been? The place has been empty without your stimulating input of late.)

VFL 01 Jul 2008, 11:28

Oh Good God...

All I can say is I am losing my mind over a certain myopic guy. I am lost in his power rings.

Men on the board, I am asking you...can you "tell" when women are checking out your lenses?

I try to be subtle. Even guys who are straight...do you "feel" it when your lenses are being checked out?

Cut-in UK 29 Jun 2008, 00:23

Dan, there is now no excuse for a person putting up with a frame they don't like or that is not as fashionable as it was. As long as you check out the frame dimensions that suit you, (The three little numbers stamped on one of the temples usually)you can then order on the internet at VERY modest cost. Try on the sample frames in a High Street shop first and make a note of makes and styles. Optical4less or Glassescrafter have great choices that look like many of them. Be sure you get the prescription details absolutely correct.

dan 28 Jun 2008, 20:07

harold,

i'm struggling with that myself...i love having the crisp vision i get with my glasses but i don't NEED them for anything except for far away. therefore, i don't wear them much but have been wearing them more recently...i think part of my problem is my frames, im not too thrilled with them. i'm thinking of getting new frames soon so then i'll be able to wear them more and be able to like the way i look haha

benn 28 Jun 2008, 15:21

It is one easy to leave them on and two once use to it you like the sharpness and not having strain to deal with.

Harold 28 Jun 2008, 14:48

What is it that makes someone who wears glasses "frequently" decide it's not worth taking them off and so become a full time wearer?

chrisB 09 Jun 2008, 16:00

An explanation of optical obsession.

Some time ago as part of a thread about fetishism I posted the assertion that glasses obsession was not always fetishistic but simply a manifestation of the fact that we find symmetry attractive and that glasses trick the brain into seeing the subjects face as symmetrical.

Here's the original link from the Daily telegraph's lighthearted article.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/main.jhtml?xml=/earth/2008/06/05/scifashion105.xml

links to the research itself.

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/05/080507083952.htm

The original site

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rBsOQXxOyJw

I rest my case but I wonder if the researchers would be up for morphing glasses onto a whole bunch of faces and re-running their tests?

lazysiow 13 May 2008, 23:59

That should read posters of models wearing non rx glasses :)

lazysiow 13 May 2008, 23:58

Lots of frames and smaller mirrors, less pretentious and pushy sales people and get away from boutique atmosphere. Its an optical store, not a beauty parlor. Most of the high street places now make me feel pretty uncomfortable, I don't even shop for glasses in them anymore. The frame selection is getting lower and lower and the spaces in theses stores are getting emptier and the walls are getting filled more with models wearing non rx glasses while maybe 20 frames fill up a wall.

Ive never seen more than 2-3 people in these places at a time. They are far from efficient or optimal in their use of floor space and its all done just for looks. There was an article I read awhile ago on that blog that has reviews/news on online glasses retailers about a store he'd found that was almost competitive with online prices. They had a similar set up, no frills, lots of selection packed in and the store was filled with customers with no pretentious sales jerks around. If anyone has a link to that blog I could find the article.

Zorab 13 May 2008, 15:30

Just imagine you had enough money to buy your own optical store. How would you change it to give maximum appeal to glasses lovers, including the likes of us to who post to this site. Here's what I'd do:

- a genuinely wide range of frames, including fashions from all the decades, not just the current trends.

- any script and tint you ask for.

- help with contact lenses for goc-ers.

- lots of large photographic portraits of real glasses wearers (not models with planos).

- young attractive female staff for consultations with hetrosexual males and fit young males for girls

... what else?

Seaworthy 10 May 2008, 12:28

As an admirer rather than a wearer of glasses some of the things chronicled here intrigue me. I've read about people getting their first pair of glasses seeing the detail of leaves on the trees and people who never knew it was usual to see the faces of people across the street. Then they get glasses and some resist, some adapt to them. How does it feel to realise that you need to wear them more? And what is it really like to be someone who needs, or would like, to wear them more but is too shy to?

I'd love to hear some experiences because I'm curious.

still 01 May 2008, 16:26

Sounds better.

John 01 May 2008, 10:59

This is a true story. I know I should stop but its just I enjoy it and she never complains about her eyesight as long as she is wearing contact lenses or glasses so she can see well. Maybe next time she asks me for contact lenses I'll just buy the ones for her prescriptions and if she complains I'll take her to the doctor so she can have a new exam for contact only. Any thought?

John 01 May 2008, 10:59

still 01 May 2008, 08:08

Forgive me, but I am skeptical: This sounds so much like the beginning of a story on Bobby's page(which I always enjoy, needless to say!). But if the story is true, then you are probably causing your gf to accommodate more than otherwise she would - she will reach a limit. And, of course, what you are doing is criminal, really, and I think you should stop, and also consider whether you really have any authentic feelings for her or not. Repent now, before you cause her serious headaches, or worse.

01 May 2008, 08:06

John: You are making her eyes get more nearsighted. Go for it!

John 01 May 2008, 06:22

Hi to all.

I have being paying reading the entries on this website for a long time and I do indentify my self with a lot of feelings that are posted here everyday. About 2 years ago my gf got her first pair of glasses. She is 23 now and I wanted her to have stronger glasses so when he got contacts that were 0.5 and then after a year she when for glasses and her new precription was .75 for glasses so when she wanted contacts again I offered to order her some and I ordered her 1.5 and she never complained. About 4 weeks ago she went for another exam saying she couldnt see well so she got a glasses priscription for 1.25 so she asked me to order contact lenses again so I could resist and I ordered her 1.75 and she was have of how crispy her vision was. The questions is am i inducing Myopia or her prescription was lower than required and and I get contacts a little higher I'm actually getting her on prescription. As far my understanding goes, 1.75 glasses is equivalent to 2.00 glasses or so right? And don't you guys worry as far as base curve and diameter, I used the same numbers and same brands that she was prescribed the first time . Any comments?

Chris 26 Apr 2008, 12:06

Seem the optical profession is on to us. Things may never be the same again.

Smudgeur 25 Apr 2008, 04:56

Don't recall anyone referring to this article before:

http://www.opticourier.com/1webmagazine/2006/02feb/content/far_side/index.asp

Ivan 03 Oct 2007, 00:16

Tuna- yes,ok. I'll take that on board.I'll read further related postings as and when.many thanks,Ivan.

tuna 02 Oct 2007, 08:41

Ivan,

My friend has -8. He has (i assume) high index lenses because they don't look thick at all to me. Much thinner than the -7s he wore back in college. There is still a lot of cut in, but even that seems less noticeable than the older glasses. So with your lesser RX, I wouldn't worry at all!

Ivan 02 Oct 2007, 07:24

Cactus Jack-ok-thats good advice I think.

I'm 44.Perhaps old enough to have been more confident in the past than I have been.I'm already feeling so much more confident the more I read the post's on various parts of the site.Contact lenses are not an option for me as they really make my eyes red and sore after a few days wear-not just the "wearing in " sort of pain but really sore!

Anyway thanks for your comments and time to reply.

Ivan.

Cactus Jack 01 Oct 2007, 16:13

Ivan,

Welcome. Unfortunately, the law of optics require that minus lenses be thick at the edges and thin in the center. The index of the lens and its size determine the actual thickness. It sounds like you have done all you can to minimize the thickness.

Until you are ready to consider contact lenses or perhaps surgery of some type, the next thing to consider is your attitude. It has been my experience that other people take their clues about your glasses from you. My suggestion is to decide to not worry about it. Glasses, are simply tools to correct a refractive error and they are no different than any other tool to fix things (braces to straighten teeth, for instance). Tools help us do things easier and your glasses simply help you see easier. If you decide that they are no big deal, soon others will decide the same - that they are just part of you, like your hair. Then, all they will notice are changes.

A few years ago, I got a new frame style and an accquaintance of several years stopped me on the street and asked "When did you start wearing glasses?". I answered "Oh, about 25 years ago." His response was "You know, I never noticed that you wore glasses." My Rx all the time he had known me was about -4.50 w/trifocals.

May I ask your age?

cut-in UK 01 Oct 2007, 14:53

Interesting comment, un-named poster.

Do you feel arousal at all girls in glasses, and does the intensity increase with the prescription?

Is it the same for both minus and plus or is there a preference?

For me, it is high myopia that does it, but tell us what does it for you.

30 Sep 2007, 10:53

The strange thing is, seeing someone with glasses on, makes me feel like I'm seeing her naked, and it's just as arousing. Stranger yet, if she takes her glasses off and squints, it's like she's double-undressed.

Ivan (guest) 30 Sep 2007, 04:47

Hello all.

I have been reading these many posts with great interest after discovering Eyescene a few weeks ago and for me the site has been a revelation as I now feel so much more confident with my relatively high prescription; -6.25/-7.00.However Im still somewhat unconfident about the thickness of the edge of the lens. I have a high index type with Gant Leroy semi-rimless frames which Im told look great on me, so then do people really notice the thickness a lot? Or is it just gwg admirers? Should I not be concerned either way? If this is on the wrong topic thread please forgive me and I will re-post.

Ivan, England.

cut-in UK 26 Sep 2007, 14:17

Correct in every detail Zorab! The real essence of a fetish or an obsession is that it is predominant in your thinking. To some, it is triggered after periods of being dormant, but it always resurges with the same strength; as if it had never left you. The other element is that of susceptibility. Some of us are more easily drawn into the world of glasses. This is why we are here at 'eyescene'. It is a brotherhood, or indeed a sisterhood, that we all belong to. We are not 'all the same' but we share many similar values, and glasses are important to us. It is aleways a pleasure to read people's accounts of how they are stimulated or fascinated by the sight of someone who is a 'high minus' or a 'plussie'. Also the pleasure of being 'bare-eyed' or enjoying fulltime GOC. There is, for us at least, nothing quite like it!

Zorab 26 Sep 2007, 12:37

In some ways, the wearing of glasses might be compared with some types of drugs:

1. They heighten the senses (or sharpen your vision, anyway).

2. The more you wear them, the more you want to wear them.

3. The wearing of glasses becomes habit forming.

4. The more you wear them, the more you become dependent on them for life to be normal.

5. To begin with, the prescription makes everything crystal clear, but over time your eyes want ever more powerful lenses.

6. The allure of stylish frames is too great for some to resist, and the decision to wear glasses is no longer just a matter medical necessity but an exercise in self-indulgence and face flattery: we like the attentions of the optician and we like reaction we get from those around us in short, glasses make us feel good about ourselves (well some of us, anyway).

Sophie 24 Aug 2007, 10:22

Um, yes, we have already had sex... and he automatically always takes them off before.

However, the "jumping in quickly" idea sounds good, I'll try it next time...

benn 24 Aug 2007, 07:57

I am a GOC person, full time for a long time, now part time when I want to be.

I must say that being very nearsighted, uncorrected, during love making is a bit of a rush. Everything up close is better. And the blurr of the "backround" lets one "focus" on the fun at hand.

i cannot comment on the real nearsighted person, but one of my contacts give me about a -13, so...for what it is worth.

user-x 23 Aug 2007, 20:32

not to get too personal, but have you two had sex already and if so, did he take them off then?

you could just jump into it quickly enough and make sure he has his hands full without having a chance to take them off.

he might be worried about them getting broken during the "festivities." at -13 he would most likely be pretty hosed if anything happened to them

23 Aug 2007, 18:35

You might just say "You can keep your glasses on if you want to."

23 Aug 2007, 17:50

He's pretty nearsighted, so I'm surprised he takes off his glasses. I'm sure he would not mind wearing them.

Sophie 23 Aug 2007, 17:30

Hey guys, I'm back again! ;-)

I have a question: I've had this great new boyfriend for a little more than 3 months now. He wears glasses that are around -13; he doesn't even own contacts.

Here's the point: I think he looks very cute in them and I would like him to keep them on during sex. I think it would turn me on very much. But I am not sure whether I should tell him and, if yes; HOW I should tell him. I mean he can't afford contacts at the moment and I don't think he minds wearing his glasses very much as far as it concerns his appearance. However, I have the feeling that he DOES mind having such poor eyesight and I don't want to appear insensitive.

Should I just forget about it? Any ideas?

Clare 29 Jul 2007, 07:57

M - well done, it looks as though you're over the worst!

M 28 Jul 2007, 13:00

Oh I forgot to mention my new Rx:

-5.00, -1.25, 80, +1.25

-5.25, -1.25, 120, +1.25

M 28 Jul 2007, 12:58

Hi, I might need two spots here this will be kind of long. I wrote about a month ago, well anyway a lot has been going on. My wedding is tomorrow and then off to Mexico for three nights on a short Honeymoon. We did it kind of backwards, after COL retired in June we went to London for a week, and we are planning on going to Hawaii at X-Mas with my kids since they will both be on school break. So this is just kind of a quick getaway, since he starts his civilian job on the 15th.

About my eyes, I had a test last weekend along with my two kids. My 17 year old daughter's rx didn't change so she just got new contacts. My 14 year old son got his first prescription and it was for bifocals! Next I was up. He said my rx was jumped up .50 in each eye and asked about my near vision. I told him it was pretty good and he did a near test, and after testing me, told me I could start with bifocals myself. He said that my deteriorating near vision might be the cause of my deteriorating distance visision. He also said that I should dramatically decrease the amount of time I wear my contacts down to 8 hours or so a day and maybe take a day off per week. Just great!

Well in ordering my sons glasses I found out that my insurance won't cover progressives, so he got lined lenses and my daughter's contacts, and I ordered contacts and decided to hold out on glasses for a few days, and decide what to do. This was last Saturday and my contacts would be in on Tuesday.

On Monday my mom got here to help get ready for wedding and stay with kids while we're in Mexico. Got new contacts Tuesday and noticed immediately that they did make my near vision worse, but distance was really good. Wednesday Mom, Col, and I went to dinner at same restaurant that started all this and this time it was even more impossible to read menu, and now not only did I have my 49 year old husband to be reading menu without problems, but my 62 year old mom was able to choose a meal without wearing her reading glasses. (Lucky me to inherit my dad's bad eyes, at least I didn't get his alcoholism). My finance remembering last time, started to ask if I wanted him to explain anything, but I cut him off not wanting my mom to know. He must be confused now!

Work was a disaster. I am a receptionist, so do a lot of book work. Thursday on my lunch I went out and bought a pair of reading glasses and have been wearing them to work, because without my eyes were watering and I was getting a headache. I talked with COL about it lastnight and about insurance, and expensive lenses and he laughed at me and told me to buy whatever I wanted and he would come along and pay for it.

So today we went back and I ordered plastic black cateye shaped with high index 1.6 progressives. They should be ready by time we're back. I guess I'll try to heed the doctor's advice, I think I'll wear glasses at home though and not at work. I just hope they are thin and don't look like I'm blind.

Clare 08 Jul 2007, 08:55

M - congratulations, you must feel very relieved. I've always felt uncomfortable about introducing glasses into a conversation and since I mainly wear contacts I think most people have forgotten I wear them.

M 07 Jul 2007, 21:03

Hey, I did it! But first to answer a few of your comments. Hansel, At 49 there is a bit of an age gap, and he likes to take care of me so maybe when I asked the waitress and not him it kind of irked him. I mean is that normal to be 49 and not need readers?

Curious- in answer to your question, I just always wore my contacts, and even at night many times, or I would slip into the bathroom and take them out and put them in my purse while he was already in bed and then since the light was out anyhow I didn't have to see anything. It's just something that happened I never planned on letting it go over a year, but it just happened. I'm very self conscious about it, and the longer it got the harder I thought it would be to tell him.

Anyway, to the story. . He called today and we made arrangements for him to come over and pick me up for breakfast. So I was just going to wear my glasses, but I didn't want to go out in public, so I chickened out and right before he got there I put in contacts. We went to breakfast and on the way back I was really nervous and he said was something wrong. I said my eyes were itchy and when we got back to my place I would take out my contacts. HIS ONLY RESPONSE WAS " Oh, Ok!" I was kind of disappointed. After all the hype and worry, so we get back to my house and I take out my contacts. He never said another thing about it, and we spent the day packing my closets and storage unit at my apartment to move to his house, so finally I told him how nervous I'd been after the incident at the restaurant and how I even thought about getting new glasses with thin lenses before I showed him. He just kind of laughed and told me that I worry too much and that I looked fine.

So I guess all the worrying was for nothing. I did notice throughout the day that if I wanted to wear my glasses I would need a different prescription as they are a couple years old and were made off a prescription that was a couple years old at that time. I could probably count on one hand the amount of time I'd worn them prior to today. I've only got one month worth of contacts left so I'll probably make an appointment pretty soon.

Hansel 07 Jul 2007, 15:12

He will be at the age when readers will probably benefit.

Head for Walmart as suggested.

Watch him closely for "long arm syndrome". Then casually ask if he wants to borrow your readers as he seems to be having trouble. He will probably take out his own specs at that point. Maybe he thinks cos you are younger that he can't admit to a sign of age as that highlights the gap!

Curious 07 Jul 2007, 14:14

How have you managed to keep your vision secret from him in such a long time?

cut-in UK 07 Jul 2007, 06:11

M, I go with the wisdom of Clare on this one, a subtle yet totally open and natural approach. As a senior officer, he won't be used to showing his feelings and you may take some time to penetrate his shell and find his deeper nature. However, I don't regard myopia as a weakness, remember you'll be able to read a book with your glasses off; he is probably of an age when the page needs to be further away for him to focus clearly, and eventually, hyperopia will kick in and 'readers' will sit in his top pocket ! It's worth studying him while reading so as you can see his natural reading distance.

We're all keen to know the outcome of your revelation. I suspect that it will work out, as you seem to be empathetic to his nature. Formal and dignified seems to be my guess, and you sound as though you can 'handle it'. You wouldn't have come this far if you couldn't.

likesGWGs 07 Jul 2007, 02:20

Let us know how it went.

M 06 Jul 2007, 11:56

He's not a bad guy like some of you have suggested, he didn't make any comments about my personal eyesight. I think it probably is just me making a mess of things, because of my self image. I was going to tell him lastnight but it just didn't come up. I don't think I really need reading glasses or bifocals yet, very rarely do I have trouble seeing close. So sometime this weekend I'm going to wear my glasses. And it'll probably be no big deal. Thanks everyone.

06 Jul 2007, 09:59

My suggestion would be to pick up a pair of readers at Walmart and keep them with you. When you need them, put them on and see what he says. You will have your answer. It is interesting that you have this dilemma because I've been trying to convince my 43 year old wife that is time for her to start wearing reading glasses. She picked up a pair the other day and loves them (I do too). She can't believe she went as long as she did without them and how easy it is for her to read and go close up work. Good luck.

Clare 06 Jul 2007, 09:37

M - my last myopic boyfriend wore contacts 90% of the time and the way he introduced the fact that he sometimes wore glasses was just to drop it into conversation. All he said was "you haven't seen me in glasses have you?". It was a casual reference but easy to do, so if you're uncomfortable about broaching the subject that may be one way of not seeming too bothered about it.

Good luck.

Speclover 06 Jul 2007, 08:36

No! M should not have to deal with him as if he is a tyrant. If he doesn't like M in her specs (or in any new progressines or bifocals she chooses to get) he's an idiot. M should get a man who just accepts her as she is. Most men would adore her in specs and would be such that she would just know they wouldn't react adversely. Indeed a man that one can even contemplate might be put off by his girl wearing specs is a mindless twit. I am clear that M should just dump him. Army officers are so up their own backsides, aren't they. I bet he's got loads of flaws himself. And he's bound to become presbyopic soon.

Willy 06 Jul 2007, 08:14

M -- I would echo what others have said that you first need to tell your fiancee that you wear contacts/glasses, before worrying about any near issues. Wear your glasses the next time you see him; that way you can give him a chance to react, and you can take them off if you need to read ;)

Random_Eye 06 Jul 2007, 06:47

get so new sexy frames, w/ the add that u need :)

likesGWGs 06 Jul 2007, 03:07

The new guy might be totally OK with the glasses. Perhaps you've read more into his comments than he meant. It's easy to do, especially if you're sensitive. You'll never know that until you discuss it with him. Give him a chance. My unproven psychic abilities tell me he won't care, LOL.

If he seems OK with glasses make sure he knows that:

1. You prefer contacts.

2. That as you get older it's harder to wear them and you could eventually be in glasses. It's not always your choice.

I hope all goes well. Let us know how it turns out.

Speclover 06 Jul 2007, 01:26

M. I think he sounds awful! If he's like this before you marry him what will it be like later? You sound lovely and there are many many men who would just love you as you really are. And. as you can see here, there are many who would regard your being a gwg (with single vision lenses or bi- or vari-focals) as a real positive attribute. If you are scared of how he'll react to you in the specs you want to wear (whatever frames, whatever lenses) dump him now. No gwg need put up with that.

M 05 Jul 2007, 19:56

Thanks guys! I know thats the only logical thing to do, but I've been very self conscious about my eyes since I was made fun of and degraded by my ex husband for looking dumb glasses. Now it has just never come up and I guess I've kept a secret from my fiance. Do you think I should go buy new glasses with thin lenses or just wear the ones I have now which are a couple years old?

likesGWGS 05 Jul 2007, 19:38

Not wanting to sound harsh but go out with him some time wearing your glasses (assuming you have some). If he stays he's your guy, if he bolts it wasn't meant to be.

There are plenty of guys out there who don't care if you have glasses and a small number who prefer that you do.

sourgrapes 05 Jul 2007, 19:35

M - Tell him; you'll feel better getting it off your chest.

Yoyo 05 Jul 2007, 18:56

You're getting married to this man, and he doesn't know you wear contacts? It's time to show him the whole package -- after all, he's going to have to live with it!

M 05 Jul 2007, 16:57

I have a dilemma which might be better suited for Dr. Laura. I found this site a few years back when considering Lasik. Anyway, I did not go through with lasik and I wear contacts all the time. My Rx is -4.50 in each eye with some astigmatism. I am 38 and over the last year and half have met a man who has perfect vision.

We started as just friends, but it's gotten closer and we are engaged. He just retired from the Army, after 26 years, was a Colonel, has never been married, very rigid. Kind of harsh. There is definitely a defined outline of how things are supposed to be. And weakness is frowned upon.

Well, the other day we were out at a restaurant and the lighting sucked the menu was small and in a cursive handwriting, and I was having minor trouble seeing it and asked our waitress to read something off it to me. She did and then I asked him if he was having trouble (thinking hes over 10 years older than me) with anything, and he said no that he wasn't and that "his eyesight was perfect" and that all the reading and writing I do at work will ruin my eyes.

I know he could read it fine, because a couple minutes later he read another thing for me. My problem is, he doesn't know I wear contacts, and I don't know he seemed as if it was a bad thing and a weakness for not being able to see. That might just be "him" but how should I tell him, especially if I am already showing signs of needing bifocals at 38.

DWV 26 Jun 2007, 14:37

Persuade her to wear glasses during sex, and maybe she'll come to associate wearing glasses with pleasurable sensations.

saltnshake 26 Jun 2007, 13:55

Put her handbag in the fridge and tell her she is going crazy.

26 Jun 2007, 09:03

Hi Anonymous,

On the subject of enticing a SO to start wearing glasses, my own experience has shown that the more I discuss it, the less likely she is to try it out. So I learned and backed off a bit. I pick my spots here and there, because I am genuinely concerned that she see well and avoid the headaches. That she looks attractive in glasses is a bonus to me.

She told me once that as much as she doesn't like the idea of wearing glasses (especially after having LASIK), she will wear them as she feels she needs to. And, to her credit, she has done just that. So backing off and taking a lighter approach helped for sure.

Good luck with helping your wife begin to deal with the possibility that she might need to wear glasses. Over the long haul, genuine support from you should eventually help her come to her own conclusions when it is time to visit the eye doctor.

Russell 26 Jun 2007, 06:38

As so often happens on Eyescene, one post gets so much attention that others are ignored. So I will offer a suggestion to the gentleman who posted anonymously. You say that you think your wife would benefit from reading glasses, but she will not consider them. May I suggest that you purchase a pair of +1s from Walmart or a drug store and present them to her as a gift. Maybe if you made a big deal of it--beautiful wrapping and a heartfelt, handwritten card attached--your wife would be so touched that she would at least try the glasses on. Then perhaps she would realize that she needs them.

Bekka 26 Jun 2007, 06:11

Don't get your knickers in such a twit there ES visitor. Sounds like you have much deeper issues with your wife that you let on. I'd send her a sympathy card for being stuck with you if I could. She's not wearing glasses just to piss you off. I'm with her.

ES-Visitor 26 Jun 2007, 02:50

Well well Also Visitor...You can't produce judgements on my relationship with my wife... The glasses thing is just a small and negligible part of a whole life together of which you don't know a thing!! This is a specific forum on a specific topic so i'll definitely not expose my whole life in here. Her right to exist is none of your business, it's OUR business, hers and mine...

25 Jun 2007, 11:19

I am a 45 year old male who has worn progressives(-5.0/+1.5) since I was 26. My wife is 43 and starting to show signs that she needs to get reading glasses. I have tried to get her to pick up a +1 from Walmart to see what she is missing but she refuses. I really think they will help her. How can I convince her to at least try them out. She has never worn glasses before.

Also a visitor 25 Jun 2007, 07:48

ES-Visitor

For as much as I identify with Optical Obsession, you have lost perspective on reality as a result. Of course she'd start aggressively criticizing women with specs - she's matching your intensity. I don't even get a sense that you care for her because of the way you demand/impose your 'wierd and odd' desires onto her. To hope that 'she'll end up with deteriorating vision' is truly demented thinking. You're so crazed that reality beyond the head of your _ _ _ _ doesn't even exist. Quit playing around with her right to exist for who she is!

ES-Visitor 25 Jun 2007, 04:01

Well I'd like to post about my wife who backed away from using glasses at all even when she does need some assistance with the computer screen, she keeps on squinting and blinking without resorting to her +1 readers. Her vision is quite perfect in fact, she's 34, and has a slight hyperopia, but really negligible (+0.5) with a slight astygmatism too. She does have glasses to correct this and also the +1 readers she used to wear for computer work. She does, also, know about my preference for women with glasses and has always had some reserves on that considering it wierd and odd. Then we went into the argument that I'd like her for wearing glasses and not for what she is actually. However she did use to wear them from time to time just for the sake of pleasing me, attracting me... Now she's backed away from that for such a long time now. She even started criticising women wearing glasses being clumsy or whatever... because they're wearing specs. She's turned very aggressive about it in fact. Now my strategy was to let her get used to readers to end up needing them more often. That has apparently failed, i'm now letting her struggle with computer screen and reading small print without even suggesting her to wear her glasses, which i used to do. My hope is that shel'll end up with a deteriorating vision and may be her hyperopia shall increase some time soon. My decision is taken, i won't tell her anything about glasses any more. She does know that I love that and that I'm al the time spotting women with glasses all over the place. I'm sure this makes her mad but she's so stubborn that she can't resolve to simply wear her glasses for me.

Eric 17 Jun 2007, 12:01

Salt, I have heard others use the "poor lighting" excuse for their nearsightedness. The guy at work just wanted to be like everyone else in my opinion. Glasses rule in Singapore.

saltnshake 15 Jun 2007, 13:35

Mabie you should turn onthe lights

Eric 15 Jun 2007, 10:01

Interestingly enough; I asked the new glasses wearer at work about what prompted the need for glasses. He said the poor lighting at our workplace.

Cactus Jack 15 Jun 2007, 07:59

Eric,

Genetics. A very large portion of the population in that part of the world is myopic. I do not know if anyone has been able to establish a reason.

Eric 15 Jun 2007, 03:21

I work in Singapore at an accounting firm. We have 21 men in our firm and all of them are nearsighted and wear glasses. About 6 months ago, we hired a new university graduate who did not wear glasses. You guessed it, yesterday he came to work wearing a low minus pair of glasses. What do you think? true myopia or wanting to be like everyone else. Which begs another question---my guess is that 90% of men in Singapore are nearsighted. Any reasons as to why we are so myopic?

lentifan 14 Jun 2007, 16:02

Cactus Jack

Thank you for the advice and the technical details on IOC implants. I realise the effect of high plus glasses might not be everyone's cup of tea, but there's a big difference between someone who resents the effect on their vision and someone who looks forward to it!

I wish I an opportunity to experiment with GOC; I'd be doing it now! My partner and family would not understand. So the cataract surgery seems my only option.

Tanasbourne 14 Jun 2007, 13:08

To the females out there:

Why do you think it is that some women just refuse to believe that they may actually look nice/pretty/hot/fill in the blank in glasses? My wife is very nice looking, and gets an added level of attraction because she also looks good in her glasses. Yet, she has a hard time believing that this is possible, and thinks that a large degree of this is just me trying to be nice to his wife (which isn't the case).

Does that ever change? Has anyone out there ever felt negatively towards their glasses but at some point reverse their opinion? If so, what were the circumstances that prompted the change in opinion?

Tanasbourne 13 Jun 2007, 17:30

My wife fought the idea of needing glasses again. In her mind, she spent the money on LASIK so she wouldn't have to deal with glasses again. So when it came up that she did need to start wearing glasses again last fall, it was a disappointment to her.

That being said, she wears them for driving, reading, using the PC, and for the blackboard at school without complaint. It is a weak Rx, but I am thinking that her eyes have adjusted well to wearing the glasses, and that she knows she sees better with them on. I do think she will balk at an increased Rx (if that does occur) at the next exam in October.

She does look great with them, so it's only a plus when she has 'em on. That and I want her to see well anyway.

Emily 13 Jun 2007, 16:56

Guest: The doctor said her corneas were too thin for a second lasic. She is happy wearing weak lenses instead of the very strong ones she used to need. She ssays that now they look "normal."

Cactus Jack 13 Jun 2007, 16:36

lentifan,

Before deciding not to have IOLs, I suggest you try GOC with very high minus contacts and high plus glasses while you can still experiment. I have known some cataract patients who had cataract surgery before IOLs who had to wear high plus lenticular glasses. The effect of high plus lenses in glasses was a very narrow field of view and very poor peripheral vision, like looking thorough binoculars. One friend wore plus contacts and low power glasses (GOC long before it became "common") as much as possible because she hated the view with her "cataract glasses" and would not drive with them.

Even if you opt to not have high power IOLs the surgeon may want to use low power lenses. In modern cataract surgery, the natural lens is emulsified ultrasonically and removed. The front membrane of the lens capsule is also removed. The rear (anterior) membrane of the capsule is left intact to provide a barrier between the vitreous humor inside the eye and the aqueous humor between the cornea and the crystaline lens.

Apparently, if you make the decision to not have IOLs. You can't change your mind.

Guest 13 Jun 2007, 14:04

Emily

Do you know what happened - did she have more Lasik correction or did she accept she just needed glasses again?

How well did she cope with a relatively mild prescription having had such a strong one before, perhaps she found it easier to cope.

Emily 12 Jun 2007, 20:36

Hi Tanasbounne,

There's a girl I chat with on Lens Chat from time to time. She was around -16 and had lasik done. In the first 2 years after, she had 2 or 3 increases, and then stabilized at -2.75. I don't know if that applies to you wife because she's much less nearsighted.

Tanasbourne 12 Jun 2007, 20:28

Perhaps someone here could shed some light on my wife's current glasses situation and a look 1-2 years down the road.

She had LASIK done in 1999 to correct a Rx of R-3.75/-1.75x180, L-3.50/-1.25x180. She had gone without glasses until late last year when I noticed that she couldn't see well at night at all. After a fair amount of hounding her, she relented and agreed to have an eye exam. To her dismay it resulted in a weak Rx of R-.25/-.75x125, L-.25/-.50x180. She was counseled by the doctor to wear them as she needed but that they would help her with driving and the computer.

She insisted that she would only wear them for driving at night, and did just that for the first 3 months. She would not use them for school, even though there were blackboards that she acknowledged she was struggling to see. She started to wear them for distance issues at school ocassionally, and then as the school year came to a close, she started wearing them almost daily at school (but only when necessary).

I noticed that she started wearing them for computer work fairly regularly a month ago, and is now wearing them for all PC work. She has also now wearing them for all of her reading that takes more than 5 minutes.

I must say that she looks quite attractive in her frames. She is not a fan of glasses, but seems to understand that she looks good in them. But she is someone that will wear them when she feels it is necessary.

She is due for a follow up exam in October. Any ideas as to what I should expect at this exam or over the next two years? She is now 38. I like her in glasses and the idea that she is going to progress in her Rx in spite of her LASIK procedure in 1999 in strangely alluring.

Thanks in advance for any thoughts on this.

Philosifer 12 Jun 2007, 14:58

Here is a little story that may entertain some of you:

--------------------------------------------------

Back in the Fifties there was an author by the name of Richard Gordon who wrote a series of seven or eight quite funny books; Doctor in the House, Doctor at Sea etc. In fact he was a doctor himself, so these were at least partly autobiographical anecdotes describing his years in practice.

In one of the earlier stories - Doctor at Large - he is talking about his first real job, as an assistant to an older doctor in a rural English village. After a long and busy day, they are discussing the patients they have each seen, and the senior man asks: " So what good cases did you see today ? ". The young doctor thinks a minute and says: "Well there was an unusual psychiatric one. An old farmer came in complaining that he experienced an erotic sensation every time he blew his nose."

The older doctor stared into his pipe for a moment before asking: "Now that is interesting, what did you tell him ? "

"Nothing much. I dont have a lot of strength in psychiatry. What would you have said ?"

"I would have told him" the old man replied without hesitation, "that some people have all the luck !"

--------------------------------------------------

I think that about sums it up for a lot of us. We are the 'lucky' ones who can experience a slightly erotic sensation simply by seeing an attractive person in well-chosen glasses , and it really doesn't have to get a more complicated than that !

Tim 11 Jun 2007, 21:57

Lentifan - you just might be able, when the time comes, to persuade someone to fit you with implants that are too strong, to leave you needing the minus prescription that you would like.

Never heard of anybody wanting cataracts before!

lentifan 11 Jun 2007, 14:57

Unfortunately my myopia is insufficient to be a turn-on. If I had the courage to face family and friends I'd get implants. As it is I'm assured I have embryonic cataracts, so I'm waiting til they need to be removed so that I can then refuse implants. That should give me perhaps double figures of plus Rx. Hopefully enough for lenticulars.

sourgrapes 10 Jun 2007, 16:20

Also, my own myopia and idea of increasing myopia is also a turn on for me. Does anyone feel the same way?

Puffin 10 Jun 2007, 16:16

Yes, TSTB sounds good to me, but a weak rx can look if in the right frames and on the right person.

sourgrapes 10 Jun 2007, 16:07

I would say the stronger the better...

I appreciate strong minus Rx more than strong plus but both are lovely.

I think the poor eyesight aspect of it is a major part of the attraction for me. And I do feel weird for feeling this way but that's how I've felt for a long time (since I was at least 10).

lentifan 10 Jun 2007, 15:58

This may not be the correct thread for this, but, just out of interest, are there many of us here who are what I will call TSTB O-Os (The Stronger The Better)? Whether you're a plus fan or a minus fan, do you get more turned on by glasses, the stronger they are?

It's certainly true for me. I'd go so far as to say I almost unmoved by very mild Rxs, especially planos or mild plus.

cut-in UK 10 Jun 2007, 13:37

Interestingly, all the 'beautiful' subjects are generally known to us and we can relate to our experience of their personalities. This can be either a character they have played, or indeed, their own persona. Either way they are not an anonymous face.

Hence the 'chemistry' of attraction is already enhanced by what we know of each of them. Would we obtain a similar result if any one of us posted a photo anonymously? Clearly symmetry is subjective; think of Count Dracula, lots of straight lines and a fabulous 'widow's peak' hairline !

I believe some interaction is required to transform visual attraction into the deeper admiration, we sometimes call beauty. I believe a superficial view can very often disappoint at closer quarters. Anyone else agree ?

Tim 10 Jun 2007, 00:07

I think the video demonstrates clearly that slight asymmetry is more attractive than complete symmetry. But personally I am not turned on by girls with glasses of significantly different prescriptions in each eye. I once had a girlfriend who was about -3 in her left eye and -8 in the right - I always wished she had been -8 in both!

Mia 09 Jun 2007, 23:32

The last few posts carry interest. But in a "search" for the root of the glasses attraction, I'm more inclined to base my thinking on my own and others' experience of the attraction, and then to look for more general outside explanations, than the other way around. While symmetry from glasses may well be significant, what has it got to do with the attraction some [many?] experience when a bespectacled partner goes without glasses? There may be any number of different factors that contribute to the attraction to glasses. Personally, the explanation of symmetry does not strike a particularly strong chord with me. Although I do find attraction to physical/ visual elements in a person of the opposite sex, my attraction to glasses has always felt to me to be far less visual. But that is not to say that everyone attracted to glasses feels the way I do. I am only one person. Who knows what would happen if one tried to synthesize the different ways in which people experience attraction to glasses?

ChrisB 09 Jun 2007, 16:35

Reader,

I quite expected the charge of reductionism - but I think you are confusing assessment of 'beauty' with deterministic, evolutionary biology and genetics. In no sense am I able to comment on freudian psychoanalysis or psychology in general. However applying a very broadly accepted principle that scientific belief and truths (as distinct from mathematically provable facts) can only be applied in their social/historical/political context - Freud, and other theorists in the same field came to prominence in the late 19th century at a time when it became apparent that neither the 'church' or the relatively new science of genetics (mendel) and darwinian evolution could not fully explain human behaviour. "

Oh, well if its not god and it's not evolution, lets give airtime to someone who has a morally acceptable, alternative explanation. Freud.

But we are talking about an individual's motivation to achieve a carnal act, not abstract assessments of beauty.

reader 09 Jun 2007, 14:22

ChrisB, there's a lot more to beauty than just symmetry. and fetishism will still come on top of that. Firstly, it could be said that attraction is strongest to something perfected but slightly flawed. this would explain the fact that the actors' faces seem more beautiful in real life, and that their "symmetrical" counterparts seem a bit strange ("uncanny") and even slightly repulsive.

As for fetishism - espcially for glasses, it has to do with so many factors, anxieties and passions, that no one would be able to translate it into words and solve it. In psychoanalysis there is a deep connection that is drawn between lossing one's eyesight (in dreams, in fears), and loosing one's sexual power, the white liquid in the eyes being a kind of sperm analog...

Well, basically what I want to say is that we shouldn't be tempted go for the easy reductions, they usually miss the entire point.

chrisB 09 Jun 2007, 09:29

I apologise if this explantion is self evident but, the video shows images of famous people who are identifiably bsaid to be attractive. Because of the subject's pose and the angle of the camera you can't immediatly say that the faces are symmetrical.

The clever film maker then morphs the pictures so the face is presented as a 2d image 'face on' and yes the individuals have symmetrical features.

What is happening is that our highly evolved brain, having initially established the image contains a person of a desireable gender, (i.ewith whom we might wish to copulate and reproduce), manipulates that image subconsciously to test the symmetricality.

If the image passes the test - persuit ensues immediatly. If not, well maybe the personality is attractive or some hours later and following a lot of fermented berry juice, confusion sets in.

The spectacles simply fool our brains into accepting that the subject to has a symmetrical face.

If you were to take these individual's faces and morph glasses onto them would they become any more or less attractive?

I rest my case.

chrisB 09 Jun 2007, 09:10

Some of the recent posts on the psychology of glasses talk about the fetishistic aspects of this 'fascination'. In a post some time ago I deprecated those theories and suggested that the attraction to people with glasses was very simply the impact the symetrical glasses have on our perception of that individual. - Nothing more. Here is a link from Youtube that cleverly illustrates our genetically programmed attraction to symmetry.

watch the link and I will then explain it in the next post.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rBsOQXxOyJw&mode;=related&search;=

Kathy 07 Jun 2007, 08:32

Our pleasure! :)

Understandably anonymous 06 Jun 2007, 18:53

Before feminism: Highest earning man gets to pick the prettiest "prize."

After feminism: Highest earning man gets to pick the prettiest "prize"--but now he must be pretty, too.

Way to raise the bar, ladies!

Clare 06 Jun 2007, 13:51

I think Amie is right - alot of guys don't (yet) understand the nature of physical appearance, although I'm glad to observe that pressure to style hair/wear good clothes is changing that. I think the addition of glasses as an accessory to the male gender can only come soon. I hope so - good glasses look great on a guy.

Jennifer 04 Jun 2007, 15:09

I think you're right. I spend a lot of time picking my glasses. Maybe guys don't spend as much time chosing frames. It's a pleasure to see a guy wearing glasses that look very good on him.

Amie 04 Jun 2007, 13:48

I always notice a guys glasses, whether they are well chosen I mean.Sometimes I see a nice guy whose appearance is just ruined by the wrong glasses which is such a shame but I think alot of guys just don't understand it like a fashion statement. Am I right in thinking that most guys just think I need glasses, these glasses are okay?

I'm alot more choosy when picking mine.

Jennifer 04 Jun 2007, 13:34

I've had a facination for glasses for as long as I can remember. When I became interested in boys, those boys wearing glasses were much more interesting. My strongest attractions have been to those good looking guys who wore glasses. Yet, the guy's personality has always been important. I dated one guy who wore very strong glasses, but overall he wasn't a very nice person. I wasn't going to force myself to stay in the relationship because of his glasses. I preferred to find another (even if he didn't wear glasses) than be treated badly by any man. Handsome guys wearing glasses have always caught my attention. I can't help myself. It's something I've learned to accept about myself.

Puffin 04 Jun 2007, 04:49

Alas for me the GWG's I used to meet occasionally were either totally unsuitable in other ways or else not interested in me at all.

Tulip 04 Jun 2007, 04:26

I recognize the feeling the ES-Visitor has. My wife wears rimless glasses -3/-4 and she knows they turn me on. She also wears them during sex. She's a bit disappointed bout the fetish, because she has the feeling her glasses are the only thing that turns me on. She is very pretty, has beautiful hair and eyes, nice tits. I told her a couple of of years ago that it is a wish of mine to wear glasses too, but in the -8 or stronger region. I wear glasses every evening, it's an old pair of hers (she knows and supports) and most of the times I wear contacts, -3.5. Since I started wearing contacts and glasses more often, my eyes have gone back from +0.75 to -.5, but that's not any way near the preferred -8 of stronger. Last week she asked me to wear glasses while having sex and I did.....

Phil 04 Jun 2007, 03:52

I do find this discussion so interesting. I wish I'd known that there were people like Mia and Amie around when I was young. But before I came hear I thought I was very much an oddball for liking girls in glasses.

I understand absolutely where Mia is coming from. Glasses are for me an indication of intellegence; and even with my strong feelings of attraction to girls wearing specs I do not get drawn to the dim or to gauch. To me a smart pretty girl wearing nice glasses is attractive because I suspect that I would have lots to say to her, and she to me. Yet the specs add a touch of vulnerability that counters the inevitable fears of being with someone accomplished. I suspect my very strong preference for a myopic girl over a hyperope is rooted in my experience of the shortsighted as tending to be intelligent.

I too am not attracted to a very high rx. There's a lot of talk of that here but it does nothing for me. To me a girl with an rx of between -2 and -4 or -5 is perfect. I don't know why but I think that I see glasses as an accoutrement that enhances beauty. So I do not want the glasses themselves to be ugly.

ES-Visitor 04 Jun 2007, 01:19

Extremely informative!! Having been an "obsessive" O-O for such a long time, I do miss the fantasies I used to have during sex with my wife, just imagining her needing strong glasses to see... I do admit she does have the necessary qualities to attract me sexually... But the O-O thing is still something I do really miss. She does know about my attraction and she has very low prescription glasses she sometimes wears, she also, from times to times, wears +1 readers for the computer; it's been now weeks that she hasn't put them on...I know she is very upset about that matter as she feels if she wears glasses I'd just be attracted to her for that and not for her real assets...It's sad that non O-O don't take it easy and 1st level analysis. I'd love to have my wife accept glasses as an accessory like any other and not get too much philosophy involved.

cut-in UK 03 Jun 2007, 23:14

Martyn, I think it is clear that you are not an optic obsessive, at least from the way you describe this lady with whom you are clearly enraptured.

The posts of Mia and Amie give you an insight about the level of priority each attaches to glasses. Both different slants but clearly the attraction is for the whole person. Optic obsessives are, in the main, sensitive and caring people, feeling about others, just as you do. We have a 'chemistry' that turns us on, to varying degrees, where glasses/vision is a strong factor. We would not decry your view of a relationship and what makes it work. Your lady sounds as if she has your total admiration, and it surely wouldn't surprise you, if you met others who would share that view. You note however that many optic obsessives are partnered with people who do not share their feelings about glasses. This does not stop their mutual attraction.

Mia 03 Jun 2007, 18:10

cut-in UK

that's a good question, which i can't really answer definiteively! sometimes i do think that it is the dependence that attracts me. however, i'm not especially attracted to very high scripts. in fact, i prefer that a man has at least some reasonable functionablitity without them. i am currently dating a man who wears -2 glasses full time. an interesting thing, is that when i am with him, and he has taken off his glasses, i feel that not only he gets closer to me, but that he is more focused on me, rather than on the things around us, literally and figuratively. and i really like that, as selfish as it might be. i also like that i am one of the only people who gets to be with him bare-eyed; i feel that is one area of his existance that is somehow reserved for me. although at times i get a little thrill out of being able to see what he cannot, or get a little pang of affection at his slight weakness the same way i might if i were to be comforting him if he were sad, my attraction is not namely one for the weakness of him needing glasses. [yet the glasses attraction is very legitimate and present!]

Martyn 03 Jun 2007, 10:27

I have been dating a lady for years now, she has an rx of - 13 and 4.5 astigamtism, not once have I ever taking into account any attribute relating to her glasses. To me she is attractive, warm kind loving generous to others, and very helpful to those less fortunate than herself. She has worn glasses since she was 6 years old. Can you believe she suffered the indignity of being sent to a blind school for her education when at the time all she needed was glasses.

If i meet someone with a high RX I think they are only an aid to help yousee better, and the secret no to embarass anyone hith a high RX is to look at their nose when chatting to them , it saves them thinking you looking at their glasses and you can converse confidently with them and you with them.

Glasses are a mere detail in the totallity of the person and their personality, the are human being with feeling just like the rest of us.

Amie 03 Jun 2007, 09:56

I definitely must be an OO, although I didnt realise there was a term for it till I came across this forum.

I wear glasses myself (my prescription is -2 and -2..50) but my friends and family think Im a lot more short-sighted because now I always make sure I am wearing glasses or contacts and the glasses I wear are -3 and -3.50. Of course I could do without them so I feel a bit of a fraud but I also feel a bit of a thrill. I always wanted glasses as a child I remember a close friend got them, we cant have been more than 10, I remember they made things a bit larger but I dont really remember how much she wore them. Then when I got my own I was delighted and when I got some contact lenses I sort of drifted into this game that I couldnt do without them. I think that maybe partly because when you wear contact lenses I think people assume that you have a strong prescription, and so I kind of played up to it.

I am strongly attracted to a handsome man with glasses, but have only been out with a couple and sadly the glasses havent been enough to make them the one. Ive never used the glasses thing to fuel fantasies and I dont think I could ever share this with my partner.

Great to find this forum and know Im not the only one.

cut-in UK 03 Jun 2007, 01:32

Mia, is it the look of dependency that attracts you. It's the fact that you don't appear to want the person to wear them all the time; merely the fact that they are myopic seems the important thing.

Contrast that with those who prefer their partner to keep glasses on during love-making. Clearly, arousal stimulus.

However, you have a more cerebral slant to the whole thing; less fetishis, more 'strong preference'. Do I sense a more controlled and clinical approach?

All4Eyes 02 Jun 2007, 14:26

Mia: That does sound nice! Though I have a bit of a weakness for the really high scripts also.

Mia 02 Jun 2007, 13:50

I find it a bit hard to relate to the intensity of the glasses fetish many people here describe. I would definately describe myself as attracted to glasses. But for me, I feel, or at least i think i do, that the attraction is less sexual. I know that I am quite drawn towards academic types, especially men who are well-read. I used to think that I liked glasses because I associated them with people who read. But I don't think that can quite cover it. I'm not attracted to glasses on particularly unintelligent/ignorant/lazy people, and I am not attracted to the glasses on intelligent people with no social skills. But I am very much attracted to people who who wear glasses who are both intelligent and have social skills, and I am aware that the fact that they wear glasses significantly increases my attraction to them. And I'm not exactly sure why. I also am much less attracted to the glasses themselves, than I am to the person who has to wear them. My glasses-related "fantasy" would be a kind, intelligent man with a perscription roughly around -2 to -5, without his glasses on, sitting with me talking and relaxing, and having to squint now and then. For me that would be just prima!

DWV 02 Jun 2007, 03:20

I think it is a good thing if you can share your OO nature with your partner. Suppose your parter was the one with the weird fetish: wouldn't you indulge them, even if balloons or fuzzy cat ears don't do anything for you? It seems to me that getting your partner horny will have some benefits for you as well. But then, if they see their myopia as a handicap they may be very sensitive about it and worry that you're only into them because of that, not because of who they are. So while in the long run it has to be a good thing, you might need to handle it delicately.

As for when I got infected with the fetish, I can't remember any close family members or neighbors with strong glasses. My first grade teacher wore glasses; in the class photo she looks pretty (and young) with moderately strong cateye glasses. I remember wishing I had glasses long before I actually needed them, making frames out of construction paper, and being fascinated by a newspaper ad for children's glasses. Around grade 4 the teacher discovered I couldn't read stuff on the blackboard, and I got glasses for real.

All4Eyes 01 Jun 2007, 15:25

Part 3

Anyway, so far Ive gone off more into psychology than glasses. Getting back on topic, Ive been trying to trace the origins of my OOness and have a few theories. 1. I was adopted at 8 months old after having been grossly neglected (I was, in fact, nearly dead and not expected to live when I was first taken into foster care). My adoptive family was the first place I had stability and love, while from my biological family I had nothing but mistreatment. No one in my biological family wore glasses during the time I was with them, but nearly all of my adoptive relatives (including both parents) wore them full-time. Hence, perhaps I came to conclude that people who wore glasses were safer to be around and could be counted on to treat me better than people without them. Its even possible my preference for minus lenses as opposed to plus comes from the fact that my mother, who was mostly responsible for raising me, was myopic, while my father, who more-or-less ignored me, was hyperopic.

Another possibility is that my feeling of inferiority to others, particularly males, which results in jealousy and a fear of being dominated by someone stronger, feeds my OO because I feel more in control and less dominated by a man who has the weakness of poor eyesight and the knowledge that I can easily disable him simply by taking away his glasses (though I never really would) gives me a sense of security and power, or is it just equality, which Im so unaccustomed to that it feels like power? Not that a vision-impaired guy couldnt still beat the $#@! out of me (Im barely 5 feet and 100 pounds, with cerebral palsy, and not much of a fighter, even in spirit, so a vision-impaired 12-year-old girl could beat the $#@! out of me!) but it makes me feel better, anyway. Of course, none of this explains why I want to be super-nearsighted myself. I wonder what percentage of OOs have this as an aspect of their desires? I also think my reluctance to wear glasses myself when I knew I needed to added to my OO, as well as being partly caused by it (there's more than meets the eye (pardon the pun) here as well, but I'll save that for later). I would like to know how OOs feel about their own vision and how their own vision influenced their OO (and vise versa) as it developed.

I ALWAYS make passes at guys who wear glasses (even if they DO make me jealous!), Marie

All4Eyes 01 Jun 2007, 15:24

Part 2

Someone here was discussing duplicity in their thinking concerning their OOness, I have a duplicity as well, concerning masculinity and male sexuality. I'll be the first to admit that I've harbored some negative feelings towards the male gender and members thereof, ranging from distrust to jealousy and anger to fear. Partly it started with my father, who, while not abusive, was also mostly absent in my life, even though he lived in my house. I've not had much in the way of positive male role models. Partly, too, I think there is some good ol' classic Freudian penis-envy going on. At the same time I find men attractive physically. When I think about a guy in a sexual situation, there is a strange chain of events which takes place in my mind, I go from envy (it seems like he must be enjoying the experience much more than I would) to anger (how dare he get something I cant have!?) to arousal (despite all this negative stuff, I cant deny that theres something about a horny man that really excites me) to sympathy (as I get intensely aroused and begin to sense frustration is certain if climax doesnt happen, I realize that this feeling is likely even more intense for men and ALMOST feel sorry for them).

All4Eyes 01 Jun 2007, 15:24

Part 1

I've been thinking about all this "What does being an OO mean in my life and how did I get this way, anyway?" stuff for awhile now and am actually working on a rather lengthy article about it that I'll send Bobby when I'm finished with it. I'm trying to write this as a kind of introduction to the whole OO thing for people who are new to the pro-eyewear community and for friends/loved ones of OOs who have "come out".

Assuming one has a bespectacled significant other, does your OOness add to or hinder your relationship, both overall and specifically your sex life, with that person? That is a very good question and I think it probably varies from OO to OO and from relationship to relationship for the same OO. Though I'm not in any great position to offer relationship advice, I'm actually still a virgin at 23 and haven't even dated much, but I like to think I'm fairly observant and sensitive to other peoples' experiences and most people are pretty open in talking to me about their relationships. But then, again, I think there is some difference for women vs. men, we tend to stay a bit "cooler" in the head about these things and our thoughts and actions are less directly dictated by our sexual feelings, not to say I haven't felt a little nutty over a MIG before (on Likeglass's OO scale (it says "for the guys", but it works for us, too if you consider GWG to stand for Guys with Glasses) I'm probably about a 6 (wouldn't cross oncoming traffic for a GWG, but have hyperventilated and I really have walked into a wall while watching one TWICE!) ).

I'm also maybe not what you'd call a hardcore OO, in that it's not an absolute requirement for me to get turned-on, I can be aroused by a great number of non-glasses related things, it's more on the emotional level that it is a requirement for me (I can love a two-eyed person, but I find it nearly impossible to be "in love" with one). The problem with my sex life hasn't been caused by my fetishistic leanings (OO or otherwise), it's been a combination of difficulties related to my disability (I realize there are handicap fetishists, but for most people, I'm not what comes to mind when they envision who they want to sleep with), moral misgivings and some complicated emotional issues I have concerning sex and males in general.

01 Jun 2007, 10:53

Quote "I no longer find my wife the slightest bit attractive (even in her +1.5 ready readers!) and have not been intimate with her for years. I can only get any sexual satisfaction when thinking of a myopic young woman with nice specs, preferably undergoing an eye test or donning new glasses. My OOness defines me sexually."

Sorry Phil, but is there not a flaw in this, as there will have been an attraction that brought you together in the first place. Are you using the OO obsession to hide other problems, or has the OO obsession caused you to forget what attracted you in the first place? Perhaps, if you reminded yourself about those features, your wife, adorned with the +1.5s may yet "float your boat" again.

All best

Hansel

An OO Anonymous 01 Jun 2007, 08:23

cut-in UK

re: 31 May 2007, 23:29

I too, would like to hear how non-OO individuals like Helen perceive us. Please respond . . .

. . . meanwhile . . . A number of years ago during a peak OO craving period for me I posted a Men seeking Women personals ad on craigslist entitled something like: Guy seeks girl with thick glasses. I really got into details like extremely myopic; blind without . . . and shared enough personal history to indicate how sensitive and caring regarding their vulnerability I had been since childhood.

I got about 5 responses. 3 sent replies of interest along with pictures none of which I felt any attraction towards; 1 sent a picture of herself wearing average glasses (a real stunner!) with a comment like: Get off on this! and the most memorable shared that she wore thick glasses and thought I was weird. I managed to eke out a correspondence with her for a short while. I was more curious about her rx and trying to rally her for an encounter than her perception of my weirdness. And even though she did share that she was a minus 20; liked wearing glasses but wore contacts with only minus 10 glasses, I see now that I really missed the boat. I look back with amazement that I was so deeply entangled in my obsession that anothers observation and direct comment about my weirdness went right over my head.

Maybe Im just at a lull with my obsession right now though I would rather hope that Im getting a major wake-up call. I know where I will continually end up if I stay on this slippery slope.

Phil 01 Jun 2007, 06:12

I very much agree with what Katy says (on both points).

When I'm not busy gwgs fill my mind! When I am I have to think of other things.

Like Katy I'm convinced that my glasses thing goes right back beyond puberty. I can remember noticing girls in glasses when I was at infants school, trying on friends' glasses, dreaming of getting specs myself from a very early age. And my obsession has always completely coloured my sexual side.

I no longer find my wife the slightest bit attractive (even in her +1.5 ready readers!) and have not been intimate with her for years. I can only get any sexual satisfaction when thinking of a myopic young woman with nice specs, preferably undergoing an eye test or donning new glasses. My OOness defines me sexually.

ES-Visitor 01 Jun 2007, 05:47

I'm really glad this discussion is going on like this. It allows all of us to jot down their experience as far as this good old fetsih of ours. Eventhough I have learnt to live with it, it remains present but I did try hard to avoid it as the strongest stimulus. I'm quite happy with the result. I do admit that I still tend to look around for pretty bespectacled women and that, hwne I find them, I get a special feeling, but at least towards my wife I have now an attraction free of any O-O fetishism which does make things far easier.

Phil 01 Jun 2007, 01:14

Katy, You are so perceptive! Or am I that boring and predictable? You can always tell an Oxford girl but you can't tell her much, eh? Love the idea of you going wild after you've been here incidentally!!

cut-in UK 31 May 2007, 23:29

Some interesting comments lately on this thread;

Helen, clearly now aware of the support a female glasses wearer receives, does it change your view of wearing them yourself? Particularly evident if the confidence and pride among many females who now have access, at reasonable cost, to a whole range of styles and colours. Did/do you wear glasses, and was it the way you perceived yourself ?

Katy, fortuitously posting at the right moment ! You demonstrate exactly the same response as for a male O-O. Although there seem to be fewer female O-O's, you, and other regular lady posters seem every bit as 'driven' by it, and in many instances, even better at describing your feelings. Did you read All4Eyes here the other day?

What I have yet to see demonstrated are the true feelings and responses of females who are NOT O-O's when they come across this site; do they have a moment of revelation, and then fulfillment about their glasses/contact lenses. Do they 'convert with pride' to the former, from the latter? Do they conversely regard us as oddities ? Helen, please share with us, as your remarks and observations are particularly relevant as you appear to have stumbled on us lately.

An OO Anonymous 31 May 2007, 17:01

cut-in UK

Ive been thinking about my OO origins. Im certain it began in early grade school when a number of my young classmates were getting glasses prescribed. And it didnt happen all at once, sort of like Russian roulette - not knowing who would be next. One day youre roughhousing with a friend the next day theyre protecting their glasses or maybe not even playing with you anymore. Those glasses representing vulnerability in an object form. I remember when a cute little classmate I had a crush on showed up wearing glasses one day. I honestly dont recall the circumstances but there she is in the 3rd grade class photo wearing glasses. I think thats how innocently it begins. At that age were vibrantly fresh emotionally and able to experience our feelings simply without the complications of baggage. Also, maybe some of us kids made fun of 4 eyes. I must have been one of their protectors.

As for Phase Two The Teenage Years thats a whole different drama.

Katy 31 May 2007, 15:12

OO Anonymous - the same happens to me, if I give time/energy to my OO nature, then it does tend to 'take over'. I hadn't really realised that until I read your post. If I have been on Eyescene and my (-6) boyfriend is around, I always want to jump on him! If I am really busy with other things, then it dies down a bit - never for long though.

Cut-in - I don't recall any experience of anyone with glasses when I was very young, but I was definitely an OO at age 5 - not in a sexual way of course, but petrified of having to get glasses and fascinated when anyone else did. I think there must be some kind of tendency in people to start with.

Are Phil & Eyeman related? :-)

cut-in UK 31 May 2007, 14:06

visitor; in your youth, you were surrounded by myopia. Clearly a case of 'quod erat demonstrandum' !

Galileo 31 May 2007, 08:38

Visitor

I can relate to your issue. I went out with a high myope for a year or so and had exactly the same problem in bed. In the end I concluded that it was a guilt thing - I felt guilty about my fetish and it affected my ability to finish the sex act. I was turned on to start with and then lost it when I started to feel guilty about why I was turned on.

She was great about it and made the point that it was my problem, she was ok with the idea that her myopia turned me on - its the only positive aspect of being so short sighted she said. Even that support wasn't enough to get me past that feeling of guilt.

And I can also relate to the early experience triggering the fetish - in my case a young school teacher when I was about 8 who was very supportive when I was being bullied and no one else was interested.

visitor 31 May 2007, 06:52

cut-in UK:

both of my parents are medium-to-highly myopic. my dad has always worn glasses, my mom wore them a lot when i was a kid but started wearing contacts more consistently as i got older. i'm around -10 myself. first got glasses when i was 7 and HATED them. for years, i almost never wore glasses, even when i was 11 or so and getting up around -5. my parents finally let me get contacts then and i've worn them ever since. i'm sure that my struggle with my vision and glasses as a child contributed a great deal to the development of my OO nature.

OO anon:

i'm going to follow your suggestion and just try to expose myself as little as possible to stimulating material, focusing as much sexual energy as i can on my pretty, sexy girlfriend - making her glasses a non-issue.

eyeman 31 May 2007, 06:38

Oh Helen, you've been so wrong! I would say that only a small minority of chaps think specs an unattractive feature in a woman. A few are indifferent. But very many see them as something that enhances a woman's attractiveness. There are some "extremists" here, of course. But most chaps would think that wearing a nice pair of specs is the icing on the cake of a pretty and intelligent girl.

So are you a gwg yourself? Or might you be? What's your rx?

ES-Visitor 31 May 2007, 06:35

May I ask you one question Helen? How come you're on this forum?

Helen 31 May 2007, 06:22

Astonishing that there appear to be guys around the work with a real obsession for women wearing glasses! I've always retained eyeglasses as one of the least attractive accessories that a woman can wear. And I've always behaved accordingly...

ES-Visitor 31 May 2007, 05:24

I do identify with all that. My experience is exactly the same. Having married a non O-O woman who knows about my attraction and who hates it because she feels that I want to impose my own criterion on her and if she wears glasses, even props, that's not her that I like but the woman with glasses...After years of strugling I tend now to separate things and to forget about the obsession of thick glasses and bad eyesight... It'lle be always there I think, but rather toned down, an extra thing that can give an extra stimulus from time to time...To be frank I'm satisfied with this development because it's a kind of balanced situation which might even induce my wife to go an extra mile from time to time...

cut-in UK 31 May 2007, 00:32

Sorry O-O anon, I missed the 'when i was at school' posting. Having read it, it, you used the word 'intrigued' in relation to the thick glasses, rather suggesting this was an episode to contribute to the awakening of a fetish.

I am fairly certain that this is how it starts. I don't know however, whether it kindles a latent desire, or merely plants a seed of suggestion which starts to grow with the occurrence of further similar episodes.

cut-in UK 30 May 2007, 22:47

'Visitor' you didn't say whether you recalled a person/incident from early years that could be responsible for originating your O-O. Any ideas ?

'OO anon', you suggest that there was a 'formative years incident' with impact but you didn't go further, What you DID describe clearly supports the theory that a fetish needs feeding and builds on this. If neglected, it can subside, as your mind fills with other things, and this can last until a 'trigger incident' brings it back. This is, in some ways, like an addiction; free of it, until clear temptation presents itself.

If suddenly, a highly myopic, and attractive girl strongly presented herself as an opportunity, I doubt that you, or indeed many in your situation, could resist. As a fetish, O-O is fairly specific, and therefore exclusive. You want a turn-on but find it hard to compromise for less than your perceived 'ideal conditions'. We all seek sexual stimulation, it is just that there is, I suspect, a higher than average level of intolerance with O-O's because the glasses even need to be the RIGHT KIND in many cases. I suggest this may be partly, but only partly to blame.

An OO Anonymous 30 May 2007, 18:15

Visitor

Sorry if I appear to be skirting around the issue. I am far from being an expert. If I had a solid handle on this I might be doing something else right now.

I think this is a lot of it: Wherever you focus your energy . . . or, . . energy follows thought (intention). If I spend time checking out the posts here at Seen on the Web Im giving energy to that part of me. The more I do it, the more paved that road will become. Maybe I let it become a superhighway. Now then imagine the energy required to maintain it. How much time/energy does that leave for other things? If part of this travel time is spent expending sexual energy how much sexual energy does that leave for a relationship?

I went to my sisters for a visit. Theyve got more flea bit dogs than people living there. I was noticing my nephew scratching up a storm all red and in agony. We adults seemed less affected. Why? Maybe were thick skinned. For sure. Maybe we are able to see the futility in succumbing to the discomfort even if there is momentary pleasure achieved by scratching it.

There, two ways that describe me (not necessarily others) and my OO nature.

I function best when I dont give my OO nature energy. In fact, a good test: Be with a girl who wears glasses and NOT make an issue out of them. To be love struck and totally matter-of-fact about the specs. My OO nature runs so deep like mould one spec of light and it can stay alive. I find the more time I spend away from it, yes, even avoiding it the less hold it has.

As far as ability to express myself sexually: Ive had clean OO free sexual relationships but not without a pre-period of living clean and with an on-going vigilance during the relationships. Its a deep overgrown psychological jungle in me if I dont stand back at times and notice my actions. It may sound trite but I find its best when I live in the Present moment. And, running some Kundalini energy to help balance my sexual being doesnt hurt.

Now, the real trick will be to get off this site without checking "Seen on the web"

visitor 30 May 2007, 16:58

OO anon:

thanks for your thoughtful replies. i, too, have loved my old girlfriends and do love my current girlfriend, very dearly. and it's strange how during sex sometimes she can turn me on so much, but some little mental "switch" just won't trip without thinking glasses-fantasy thoughts.... and then sometimes i won't get to climax, and feel awful and guilty about it.

you mentioned being able to get to a place where glasses didn't play a part in your expression of sexuality in your relationships, whereas before you had trouble even getting a hard-on without that stimulus. could you tell me a bit more about what you did to break that dependency and how you got to that place?

An OO Anonymous 30 May 2007, 16:45

Visitor

To help put things in perspective: Im 51; single, again; sometimes act with the intelligence of a teenager in an often aching middle-aged body and though Ive had time to pull a lot of my life together I still wrestle with many things my optical obsession being one. Truth be told, I envy you for having the youth, intelligence and curiosity to understand yourself may your exploration serve you in the many years ahead!

I agree with cut-in UK that a feeling for something/someone in (my) formative years probably set the impetus for a potential life-long intrigue. Further, I think that this aspect of self runs *parallel* with my life and not necessarily in sync with it. It is very much a solo/self-absorbed activity that I can justify at times knowing, for example, that others out there share my fetish. I never shared this with my ex and maybe it was a mistake keeping it so private. I guess I thought I would eventually outrun it. Meanwhile, I used to sure get excited when shed take her contacts out. A sad, but true example of the out-of-sync ness would be the excitement I felt when she was forced to where her glasses indefinitely because of eye infections. Yes, part of me felt sad for her though here I was getting a hard-on knowing shed be wearing glasses for a while. Please know that I loved her (and still do). We enjoyed an amazing life together, which is why I say that this fetish aspect of self runs at a parallel with my life. I call it a dualistic nature. I can be in a great relationship; forget all about OO then see a pretty woman wearing strong glasses and wonder how Im going to respond. Perhaps the healthiest way to proceed at that moment is to breathe; be with the sensations (feelings) and choose with clarity.

As for my blindest woman incident . . . Ill post it on When I was at school thread.

Hansel 30 May 2007, 14:00

As a child of the seventies, losing virginity was something that happened to me very late more because of a fear of causing an unwanted pregnancy and/or stds rather than any glasses fetish.

I feel I have rather missed out on this side of life, I am sad to say.

All girlfriends, and my wife for getting on for twenty years have been gwgs that said! ;-)

lazysiow 30 May 2007, 12:16

Visitor, I've been where you're at even recently. As a result glasses and bad eyesight have been losing their sexual power to me. It's just been too much of a good thing and become very everyday. This site helped us focus and share our fetish and it sounds like it peaked for you too. Well.. that was a few months ago/last year for me anyhow and I was worried it was downhill from there.

Fortunately I took a break and made an effort to allow myself to lust normally for attractive women without glasses and rebuild the other parts and senses of attraction that have been neglected. I'm happy to report all's well and if anything has brought back some power to the glasses attraction :)

visitor 30 May 2007, 11:30

cut-in uk:

thanks - i hope this will start a discussion about how our glasses fetishes integrate into our sex lives.

to answer your questions:

1) no, more because of a lack of self-confidence. i was kind of awkward as a teenager (moreso than many) and didn't become really comfortable with myself and my looks until fairly recently. i had a couple of opportunities to lose my virginity early in college, but demurred because i wasn't sure i wanted to lose it to someone i wasn't in love with.

2) not necessarily; i mean, i didn't have a religious influence telling me to wait until marriage, but i did know that i wanted my first time to be with someone i cared for. i came to this realization on my own, though.

3) physically, no - there are features i like and prefer, but overall, i just need to feel attracted. in terms of personality, she needs to be bright and have a sense of humor that clicks with mine. basically there needs to be good interpersonal/friendship chemistry as well as good physical chemistry.

OO anon:

first: my fetishistic side is impressed and a bit envious that you've been able to have so many sexual experiences with women who fulfilled your thick glasses fetish. how myopic/hyperopic was the "blindest" woman you've slept with? did she wear her glasses during sex?

second: regarding what you said about duality. how did you manage to decouple your fetishistic side from your sexuality? you said you had trouble even getting an erection without glasses as a stimulus. was this during intimacy, when looking at porn, reading erotic stories, or all of the above? how did you get around this issue?

An OO Anonymous 30 May 2007, 09:52

Re: visitor: . . . have any of you had difficulty integrating this aspect of your sexuality into your sex life with your partner? . . .

I, for one, really appreciate your candor. To read your post gives me insight into my own behavior of over 30 years! My feelings/motivations have been inconsistent at best: I have loved women without glasses/without imagining them with glasses; without/imagining with; with/imaging with more and with much more/still imagining more. I still think Ill find my ideal mate with the ultimate high minus rx and well live happily-ever-after. Can you believe that? I was involved with a -10+ beauty for 10 years (married for 8 of those); slept with women with even much higher rx; I even had sex with my best friends girlfriend after I saw her wearing thick bi-concave lenses! I have spent periods of my life living in pure fantasy . . . searching on-line for hours for a momentary bliss at best.

. . . i'm worried that years of expressing sexuality in a solo fashion, using one particular kind of turn-on, has affected my ability to have intimate, gratifying sex with a partner. i love my girlfriend deeply and want to get over this hump. considering that she *does* wear strongish glasses (and keeps them on during sex!), i have no idea why i'm having this problem! . . .

. . . living a life of Duality . . . The most consistent good sex/love relationships Ive had have been when I havent thought about glasses at all. To get to that place has not been easy and maintaining it even harder. At first, I found it even challenging to get an erection without a glasses prompt. How (un)real is that? The longer I can go without thinking glasses the more connected at a deeper place my partner and I become. For me, that means letting go of this fetish and my dualistic nature.

And this is weird . . . having proclaimed all that, Im fantasizing . . . what if I could have a GOC girlfriend who loves having sex while wearing thick glasses? Couldnt I have this kinky part and still have a deep meaningful relationship?

cut-in UK 30 May 2007, 09:20

"visitor", welcome; - serious preference, obsession or fetish? We may all be genuinely interested in your responses as there is a wealth of life experience in "eyescene" and I hope you get several useful views.

My own, is that you may have had an interaction with someone, in your early years that made a lasting impression on you in a positive way. The person was myopic, probably female, probably close to you although not necessarily a member of your family. You have, in your subconscious, a defined but non-specific image, of a person in strong glasses and this a focus of admiration. It may not go as far as obsession but could be an image you feel a need to replicate in your love-life. She is on a pedestal, near perfection but, like garden statuary, the features are not clearly defined. This allows you to adapt, in a positive way, to any person you may meet who has the key attribute, the over-riding feature, which is the glasses.

I will end this part with one or two questions:

1. Was your late entry into the world of sexual relationships due to your being too specific in the image of the girl you wanted to commit to in this way ?

2. Did your upbringing somehow define the sexual act as something sacrosanct, to bestow on only the "right girl"?

3. Are there any other essential features you seek in a woman, a lack of which would cause disappointment or immediate disinterest?

Think carefully back you your earlier years before replying; the identity of the person or persons may come to you.

visitor 30 May 2007, 08:05

this is a question for the men out there with the thick-glasses fetish. have any of you had difficulty integrating this aspect of your sexuality into your sex life with your partner? i guess this is sort of a combination glasses/sexuality/psychology question... and also, i'm just trying to see if anyone else out there has had similar experiences to my own.

i'm a late-20s guy and have had a strong attraction to women with thick glasses for as long as i can remember. i have all the typical characteristics of the fetish as we've discussed ad nauseum on this website - liking the look of women wearing thick glasses, getting turned on by their need for glasses, etc. i've used imagery, fantasies, stories, etc. related to this subject matter as material for self-gratification for years, since i was 19 or so, and i worry that this has affected me when it comes to sex with a partner. i'm looking to you now for support and guidance!

for a little background, i was a bit of a late bloomer sexually - didn't have sex until my early-mid 20s. i had my first serious sexual relationship soon after that, with a pretty woman who wore low-minus glasses. we had pretty good sexual chemistry overall, though i often found that i had to imagine her wearing thick glasses or imagine her with really bad eyesight in a sexual context in order to get myself towards climax. i told her that i was into women with glasses, and eventually revealed the details about thick glasses/bad vision... she basically took it in stride, though felt a bit unsure of what she could do since she didn't need strong glasses. but since our sex life was, overall, smooth, hot, and mutually satisfying, the thick glasses fetish didn't become an issue.

that relationship ended about a year and a half ago, and i've now been seeing another woman for about eight months now. she's cute and sexy and i'm ridiculously in love with her. she wears glasses too, medium minus - not real strong but strong enough that the power of her lenses is noticeable. for whatever reason, though, our sex life has not been as smooth. she does know that i'm into women with glasses, but i have been shy/afraid about going into the details of my fetish with her. i find that during sex, i often have to do the same fantasizing/visualization in order to get to climax, but for some reason it's harder than it was before. sometimes we'll be having sex, she will orgasm, and no matter how much i try to a) get lost in the moment and enjoy the sensations but at the same time b) do the fantasy/visualization, i will lose my erection and be unable to climax.

i'm worried that years of expressing sexuality in a solo fashion, using one particular kind of turn-on, has affected my ability to have intimate, gratifying sex with a partner. i love my girlfriend deeply and want to get over this hump. considering that she *does* wear strongish glasses (and keeps them on during sex!), i have no idea why i'm having this problem!

help?

All4Eyes 28 May 2007, 20:16

Of course, I meant Christina ROSSETTI. How could I have left "ett" out?

All4Eyes 28 May 2007, 16:29

Cut-in: I actually haven't read much Millay, but I liked the few pieces I have read. I really enjoy Christina Rossi's work. Keats' Ode to a Grecian Urn is also a favorite, I often wonder about an object's past and future (funny how our possessions often outlive us). As for my OO, it it indeed a GREAT PASSION for me. I've never had an opurtunity to try GOC, but would love to if I could. I really would like to be around -12 for real (I'm *only* -4 by nature).

I ALWAYS make passes at guys who wear glasses, Marie

Gwen 28 May 2007, 15:11

I was thinking today that people in general have a certain degree of ingrained prejudice against glasses. This was prompted by my 13 yo daughter asking if she could have contact lenses. I found myself thinking that yes of course, I don't want her teen years blighted by having to wear thick glasses. She looks great in her glasses, I got her an extremely expensive designer pair at her last test but there's no hiding the fact that glasses indicate a weakness and there is therefore still some kind of stigma attached to wearing them. For people of my generation this may have it's roots in the National Health specs of our childhood I suppose. Aside from this I want her to have the choice to not have to wear glasses at times when they are impractical and I must admit I do harbour some guilt over passing on my poor eyesight genes to all my kids

Gwen 28 May 2007, 00:01

DMV, Not sure I feel blessed to have this additional attractive dimension but I suppose at my age when the breast/waist/hip figures aren't what they were, one has to take what one can get LOL. Is the fact that a woman wears strong glasses just a physically attractive feature or does it run deeper than that? What does it signify to you?

DWV 27 May 2007, 21:38

Gwen:

my take on the question of "numbers" is that they help us picture what your glasses could look like. Not unlike how the breast/waist/hip dimensions describe a woman's figure. To most "optic obsessives" you are blessed with an additional attractive dimension. :)

I've got an add of 2.25 and trifocals, which I guess makes me eight-eyed...

cut-in UK 27 May 2007, 07:03

Well, All4Eyes, a poetess. I sensed there was something about the care with which you constructed quite long sentences. As you are from 'across the pond' how do you feel about Millay. Interesting and attractive style, although the subject matter sometimes a little less so. I am really into iambic pentameter, being typically English. (how boring is that !) But to return to topic, how deep is your O-O. Your recent post suggests that it is a passion. Do you extend to GOC as I do, or are you sufficiently challenged optically to stay with your regular prescription?

All4Eyes 26 May 2007, 18:14

My profession? Well, I suppose I'm what you'd call a struggling writer, I've done a great deal of writing (mostly poetry) but have yet to sell any. But my employment options are limited, as I have quadriplegic spastic cerebral palsy.

cut-in UK 26 May 2007, 14:50

I notice, on reflection, that this thread has become rather incestuous and apologise, as I seem to be a major culprit. As it is now 10.45 pm I'm going to lock up the hens and go to bed.

'A demain' my fellow O-O's.

cut-in UK 26 May 2007, 14:44

Melyssa, I have noticed there is a new 'pride' in wearing glasses, especially amongst young females, who seem to delight in these bold, dark frames. With the internet optical suppliers, prices are now so low that no-one need be concerned at ordering a pair with considerably greater frequency than before. Those who do, may have several pairs in the same prescription. They see them as fashion accessories, matching, in each case, what they happen to be wearing on that day.

cut-in UK 26 May 2007, 14:41

cut-in UK 26 May 2007, 14:22

Gwen, I apologise for mis-interpreting your question. I am, I believe, a frustrated scientist, pushed, against my better judgment into a learned profession. I would have loved to be an optometrist. The simple truth is that the sight of a highly myopic, well-groomed female, can take my breath away. More so, if she has the depth of intelllect to engage in meaningful conversation. The fascination of the prescription is the actual or imsgined optics that the lady wears. I am just as interested in the technical detail as the appearance.

I know an English girl, living in the South of France, who we have met a few times while visiting friends. This unassuming lady of,probably 57, with her polished-edge minus-6 rimless glasses does it for me! She is in a word, EXQUISITE. That, I think, is the essence of the fascination.

Curiously, it would NOT be the same if her prescription was plus 6.

cut-in UK 26 May 2007, 13:13

All4Eyes, I am all admiration; what you say is as profound as it is true, and very well put. Are you able to reveal your profession without compromising your privacy?

All4Eyes 26 May 2007, 12:25

Phil: What you said ( "Because the OO thing is in so many cases bound up with an attraction to intelligence it's less shallow than most fetishes."-Phil, 24 May, 2007) makes very good sense. I've always felt that there is something a bit different about optic-obsession as opposed to most other fetishes. I've done extensive reading on the potential fetish aspects of everything from acrobats to zippers (BTW, I have a mild button, or rather, undoing of buttons, fetish myself) and have another quite intense fetish myself (besides the OO thing and the blindness fetish, which I tend to see as an extension of my OO (or is the OO an extension of it-things do get complicated when you have multiple fetishes!) and a series of minor fetishistic interests), and I've yet to come across anything that has the same general "feeling" about it that OO does. Ours is not a "come in, get off, get out" type of site, nor do we as a group seem to treat our obsession this way, it seems to be something we integrate into our whole lives, not just our sex lives. It becomes a topic of honest curiosity and serious discussion. The other major fetish that I have is purely sexual, I only think of it or go to look up websites concerned with it when I am in a libidinous mood (speaking of intelligent, doesn't that sound MUCH more intelligent than just saying "when I'm horny"?) and I don't post to forums about it nor do I want to. That's another thing, there seems to be a great sense of community amongst us OOs, that I don't sense with people who share my other fetish or indeed, with any other group of fetishists. From a strictly physical, "get-me-to-orgasm" pov, my other fetish is actually stronger than my glasses fetish, but because of the emotional and intellectual satisfaction my OO gives me, I could live without my other fetish but I could NEVER give up my "glasses thing"! Of course, I'm only trying to guess how the rest of you feel about this, the only person whose feelings I truly know are my own, and of course, with us women everything pretty much comes down to emotions anyway, but I suspect that male OOs are this way also, that it's more than just "glasses make me hot" even for the men. People are just too complex for anyone to try to put their attraction (or lack thereof) down to one single trait (or lack thereof), I would imagine that even for the most hardcore OO, there must be other factors involved in how they feel about a person. That being said...

I ALWAYS make passes at guys who wear glasses, Marie

Melyssa 26 May 2007, 10:32

Cut-in UK,

There are that many women who are OO's. I've only known one other woman in the past few decades who had more than two pairs of regular prescription glasses.

Gwen, I was never able to wear contacts due to my astigmatism. Two different ophthalmologists (takes 13 minutes to type that word) told me I would have to wear hard contacts. I tried them out in the office for a few seconds and they hurt real bad, so I stayed with glasses. Wise choice!

six eyes 26 May 2007, 06:55

Gwen--After years of stubborn resistance (and carrying around an extra pair of glasses all the time), I finally took the plunge and became a bifocal wearer. I now love wearing my bifocals and keep asking myself why I waited so long. Time for you to come along and join the club! Cheers!

Gwen 26 May 2007, 06:35

Cut-in UK, I KNOW what the numbers mean (sort of), they're direct indication of the strength of my lenses and hence how short-sighted I am. What I meant was, why should this fascinate you so? I like your analogy of a rare blood group but don't think it quite works, I mean I don't think there are people out there who get turned on by rare blood groups LOL. Although I may be wrong, nothing in this weird world we live in surprises me anymore. I don't wear glasses with a reading addition, I have completely separate reading glasses which I am forever condemned to carry everywhere with me due to my advancing years.

cut-in UK 26 May 2007, 02:22

I'll keep it brief Gwen, but in essence -12 to -14 is seriously myopic. i.e. your eyeball is more like an egg so a strong lens is needed to focus on the retina which is farther away from the You begin to lose focus at about 3" from the uncorrected eyes and at 8" in a mirror you probably cannot see your eyes at all. The high astigmatism (cylinder figures 4.25/3.75) means you have an uneven shape and certain areas of your vision will therefore not be in focus without further complex correction in your lenses. You may, for example, otherwise see a tall building as tapering when viewed from below instead of straight. The figures following relate to the degrees or arc from which this curvature deviates in a semicircle of O' to 180'. the final figures(+2.25) relate to the hyperopia or reading adjustment, normally kicking in for everyone as the ability of the lens to adjust for 'close work' fails normally around forty years of age.When I say 'a work of art' it is that your figures are fairly extreme.

To summarise it means that apart from your many other attributes, optically you are a very interesting person. It's like having a rare blood group. Tell me; are your glasses bifocals or varifocals?

Gwen 25 May 2007, 15:24

Cut-in UK, I was interested by you terming my prescription "a work of art". Maybe you can tell me what this fascination with the numbers is all about.

Gwen 25 May 2007, 15:22

James, I'm way past the age where I'm going to get hung up about wearing glasses. Of course it was different 30 years ago, I hated the things. I pestered my optician for contact lenses even though he told me that they didn't do them in my prescription (the astigmatism was too bad). Eventually he relented and I was given some but of course they didn't correct me fully and I went through the next 10 years' social engagements in something of a blur. I was given glasses too to wear over the contacts and they did give me clear vision but of course being young, stupid and vain I only ever wore them when absolutely necessary, like in college lectures or for driving. Somewhere in my early thirties I gave up this charade and switched back to my glasses. By this time frames had started to get smaller and magical "thinner" lenses had become available so the transition wasn't too painful. Now I quite like my glasses, they don't really affect my life in any way, they're part of me, I'm used to them. I was told that there are now contacts for astigmatism but even so they don't go up to my prescription and laser surgery isn't an option. So glasses it is, I really don't feel that I'm missing out by having to wear them. Besides I have three teenage daughters and their optical issues to worry about.

cut-in UK 25 May 2007, 13:30

Melyssa, your man sounds like he admires you in every way. That is as it should be, as you clearly have what he wants in life. Strangely enough, there is nothing wrong with 'middle age'. I am 58 and I do fulltime GOC. My only regret is that my wife, an otherwise perfect woman, does not share my optic obsession.

cut-in UK 25 May 2007, 13:19

Gwen, your prescription is a work of art to an optic obsessive. I believe the I can only endorse James's remarks and echo his final paragraph.

You probably consider it a mere matter of fact, but it is a delight to imagine and our only regret is that we rarely see the glasses of regular contributors.

Keep posting; you are a refreshing, frank and engaging person.

James 25 May 2007, 08:50

Gwen,

It may also be a case of simple curiosity. Nowadays, women (and men) - particularly those who are significantly myopic, such as yourself - are "expected" either to opt for contact lenses or undergo some other form of treatment such as Lasik. So someone who proudly wears glasses is fairly rare. That may be the wrong way to look at things, but it's a sad reality...

Based on your prescription and reading between the lines, I imagine that there are reasons why neither option has been followed through in this instance. For example, the fairly significant astigmatism you have, coupled with some presbyopia.

Personally, I admire and respect the fact that in an earlier post you decided to describe yourself ahead of your glasses. Although a glasses wearer myself and someone who has always admired women who wear them, I am far more attracted by someone's less easily-definable personal attributes, including looks, intelligence, sense of humour, interests and so on.

In fact, in a straight choice between someone who has great personal qualities and doesn't wear glasses and the other way round, I'd much rather have the first option. Assuming she were interested in me, that is!

I suspect that others on this site might disagree. Which only goes to show that, as with every type of attraction, there are many gradations between the out-and-out fetishists and those of us who simply like women who wear glasses. A lot, in my case - but not exclusively.

Anyway, good luck with finding a suitable guy. You come across as a lovely person.

Gwen 25 May 2007, 07:57

Well Cut-in I've been asked my prescription on Lenschat a number of times and was always slightly embarrassed to say I didn't know. So I went into my optician earlier today and got a copy. Apparently it's as follows; Right eye -12.75 -4.25 110 +2.25 Left eye -14.00 -3.75 90 +2.25. Again I'm slightly embarrassed but this time because I only have a vague idea what the numbers mean. This sort of stuff really has meaning for some of you guys doesn't it? I mean above and beyond the optical sense?

Melyssa 25 May 2007, 04:26

Cut-in UK, as my man and I met online -- emails first, then phone calls, then in person, I found out right away when I told him that I wear many pairs of glasses. I still remember his famous (to me) quote, "Glasses make a young woman look her prettiest." Having since found this website, I know he's not alone in his thought. And since my philosophy is that middle age is one year older than he and I are, I will always be a "young woman." :)

cut-in UK 24 May 2007, 23:54

Thank you Melyssa for confirming the order of visuals in a typical male optic obsessive. The great advantage of the internet, is that it gives you the detachment to be both totally honest in a group such as this, and also totally objective.

Did you know your husband was a 'glasses first' man when you got to know him or did it become apparent later on when he made the remark ?

cut-in UK 24 May 2007, 23:21

You seem to have a perfectly normal life Gwen, and extreme myopia clearly hasn't held you back in the field of business or procreation. Are all your daughters similarly myopic and if so , do they feel happy with glasses as a part of their personality?

Puffin 24 May 2007, 17:21

Uh, I mean a pair of eyes for each (!)

Puffin 24 May 2007, 17:20

Unfortunately I'm torn between glasses and breasts. I need a pair for each.

cut-in UK 24 May 2007, 15:14

Gwen, you know how to tantalise a man; what, precisely, is your prescription ?

Melyssa 24 May 2007, 12:46

I'm 51 and married. That'll send everyone running even faster. LOL

Cut-in UK, I get what you mean about men being more into "visuals." I guess I've learned a bit from being married all these years. My husband told me that he would first notice a woman's glasses, then her hair, then her body, then non-physical attributes; while I would notice a guy's glasses, true, but I would be more interested in his tone of voice, sense of humor, and his behavior. "I do not have eyes in my breasts, mister!" :)

Phil 24 May 2007, 10:25

48 doesn't scare me: I'm 52!

No-one regards you as a pair of specs: that would be daft. It's just that your wearing glasses will in many men's eyes add a dash of that something extra to the whole mix of enticing attributes that you no doubt display. If I were you I'd enjoy the fact that the whole you (of which your glasses are but one part) has captivated a decent chap (if that's what he is). Have fun. A woman with a nice bottom, a pair of expensive shoes or a fluency in French will use them (despite their differences) in the same way. Your specs are just another accessory to employ to your advantage.

Gwen 24 May 2007, 09:26

Phil I wouldn't call what I have, a "relationship". I've only seen the guy twice over a three week period. No I'm not Welsh, at least I don't think I have any Welsh blood in me. Funny about your aunt, I was named after a great aunt. I guess it's a pretty old fashioned name (although Gwen Stefani is younger than me of course).

Gwen 24 May 2007, 09:23

OK cut-in I was only pulling your leg. Right I will tell you about my glasses but first I will tell you a little about ME. I am after all a woman who wears glasses as opposed to a pair of glasses worn by a woman.

OK I'm 48 (there that's sent you all running, we middle aged women are usually pretty invisible). I live in the South of England. I am recently divorced although was separated for a couple of years prior to that. I have three daughters. I am the MD of a very small company. Oh and I'm very short sighted and have been since early childhood. This condition requires me to wear glasses on a continual basis.

Phil 24 May 2007, 01:09

Gwen, it's never a question of finding a woman attractive only because of her eyesight or glasses. Specs are part of a package. In my view they can enhance the attractiveness of a woman enormously. But many gwgs are unattractive. But do you find it scary that a chap likes how you look in glasses? A whole array of physical and non-physical features make for attractiveness. You are clearly intelligent-which, for me, is another very important aspect of attractiveness. As is sensitivity, which you also have. Why not just accept that your man likes you because of how you are? And that part of you is your appearance, including your specs? Because the OO thing is in so many cases bound up with an attraction to intelligence it's less shallow than most fetishes. Just enjoy the relationship and accept that your glasses are a part of you and part of what you signal to those around you.

ps I think Gwen's a lovely name. Are you Welsh? I had a favourite Aunty Gwen (really a Gwendoline too).

lazysiow 24 May 2007, 00:27

To answer your original question, while others may find your glasses attractive as an accesory. The difference with us is that it drives most of us wild and a big part of that is the prescription and the vulnerability associated with bad eyesight, not just the aesthetics of the frame

lazysiow 24 May 2007, 00:25

Sorry Gwen I didn't mean it like that.

cut-in UK 23 May 2007, 22:34

Gwen, this brings us back to why we're all here. Optic obsessives have a fascination with glasses. We are not all the same by any means. Tell us something about YOUR glasses; style, prescription, how you feel about them and how much of your life have they been a part of you.

We are genuinely interested, I can assure you.

Gwen 23 May 2007, 14:30

Well I'm sorry for being just a silly over emotional woman. I'm not really talking to the right people here am I? I was looking for information as to what this fascination with glasses and vision entails rather than looking for relationship counselling

lazysiow 23 May 2007, 09:02

in my experience your gut instincts are never wrong especially when it comes to relationships. However the problem is when people confuse gut instinct with emotional overreactions :)

Gwen 23 May 2007, 08:02

Well maybe Im jumping the gun a little here. I mean he only asked about my glasses and I suppose it may be understandable, they are one of my more prominent features. Maybe hes just a curious sort of guy who wonders what its like to see things through my eyes. Then again I havent seen him for a week now, he hasnt rang, so maybe my fretting is all academic. Maybe Im just getting a little paranoid, I was married for over 20 years and am just cautiously dipping my toe into the dating game waters again. I was going to talk to my eldest daughter about this but I didnt want to alarm her with tales of men out there ogling her glasses. Mind you shes more worldly wise than I am and is probably aware of optical fetishism already (and far worse).

cut-in UK 22 May 2007, 23:35

Sorry, I also meant to address Gwen in the some post.

Gwen, you do not need to 'go away and think long and hard' Your position is strong as you undertand the principle.

It's his interpretation of your myopia that is important. Do not dismiss it as a 'glasses fetish' as there may be an underlying caring aspect if he sees it as something that makes him want to protect you. If you have a high Rx this is more apparent as you may be seen as 'helpless without glasses'. This is just one view. Another, is that he may view you as more intelligent. It becomes very complex depending on where it ranks in his pecking order of importance. It seems quite high though!

I think this begs a running progress report from you, doesn't it.

cut-in UK 22 May 2007, 23:21

Sorry Melyssa, I didn't mean to sound patronising or pompous; it's just that, although a man is a composite also, he is normally more driven by 'visuals' first. On the other hand, a woman can sit behind a man on a bus, and will be alerted by some remark that demonstrates a personality trait that she finds attractive. This is without even being able to see his physical appearance. Can you imagine an 'average' male psyche in the same situation ? He'd probably find a reason to take a seat in front, so that he can take a sneaky peek before his brain decides to engage 'drive'. You illustrated the point yourself in your last post. More discerning males may be equally interested in your intellect. It's just that the route is slightly different.

I find the whole thing fascinating!

Lazysiow 22 May 2007, 15:33

Gwen, it's exactly that. Like jewellery or makeup, you know how some lipstick can really bring out the "fuck me lips" on women and the same effect on guys? like that :D

Gwen 22 May 2007, 14:00

The thing is glasses aren't generally considered an attribute and I'm having difficulty adjusting to this concept. I mean if the one factor that distinguishes me from other women in this guy's view, is my inability to see well then is this OK? Is it just another "attribiute" I'm "lucky" enough to have like a good figure or sparkling personality? I need to go away and think long and hard about this.

Melyssa 22 May 2007, 04:40

"All women are a collection of attributes" -- an interesting comment, Cut-in UK.

Fortunately, I had (and for the most part still have) enough of them to have found a wonderful man with whom I celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary this past weekend. True, my most well-known attribute is my collection of big, bold, and beautiful glasses in my prescription.

Gwen, even though my motto was always "Love me, love my glasses," I wanted any man I dated to be interested also in my kindness, sense of humor, and Magna Cum Laude intelligence. (And having one who wears glasses doesn't hurt either.) Things definitely worked out well for me, and I hope they do for you too.

Wurm 21 May 2007, 22:43

I have deleted a post. ES is all about sharing info and opinions, but let's try to keep it friendly.

specs4ever 21 May 2007, 19:22

Well, its a little late now, but yes, you probably should have Gwen. A guy who likes girls who wear glasses is going to naturally be attracted to the lady first because of the fact she wears glasses. However, if the initial attraction cannot be sustained by other attributes, it will be a very short relationship.

Gwen 21 May 2007, 15:17

Well cut-in UK, I must confess to being somewhat intrigued by the motivations of the aforementioned date so yes I will see him again. As I said he does seem a nice, intelligent, decent sort of guy. Oh and by the way Gwen is my real name, well Gwendoline to be exact. I'm not really au fait with internet forums, should I have used a pseudonym?

guest 21 May 2007, 14:16

great sentiment vfl but I think I read phil has a wife. maybe not such an opportunity for claire!

VFL 21 May 2007, 11:31

Cut in, you are very wise in your advice to Claire. If there is an attraction on your part, Claire, perhaps you can give the guy a "Mulligan" about the eyeglasses business (especially knowing what you do) and see if the relationship has any validity beyond the fetish.

You've posted enough on this board to have some sort of affinity for those of us who have "the bug." You could, quite conceivably, have a "perfect" relationship in your hands. You give him what he wants/needs and he will give you back (is he capable?) of what you do.

Think, girl...

If I had been in that position when I was single I would have gotten down on my knees and thanked God.

Phil 21 May 2007, 04:38

Thanks for trying to broker a meeting between me and Clare Tom. I'd love to meet Clare on that, or any other, basis. My intentions are entirely innocent. I just know that we work quite close to one another and it would be fun to have a coffee or lunch and talk about matters of mutual interest (which just might include spectacles!!). But I'm not sure that she's keen, though I hope I'm wrong about that. It would be fun to see who can see the less bare-eyed, though I think I'll win on that one with my extra dioptre of minus!

Tom 21 May 2007, 04:07

Phil, Clare: why don't you meet both bareyed? You seem quite trained in going around in the blur, I'd suggest this as a first approach. Retain some mystery could make your appointement even more intriguing, don't you think so? At least as far as no one of you absolutely needs his/her glasses to survive...

cut-in UK 21 May 2007, 00:23

Gwen, consider this concept; males tend to be driven firstly, by desire, then attraction follows. females are wired to work the other way round.

You may be doing yourself out of a genuine guy by not allowing the relationship to deepen.That is, provided it turns out that a) you are attracted to him now, and b) that you MAY desire him in time.

All women are a collection of attributes and it is a shallow man indeed that would merely be attracted to your myopia. I think your brief posting illustrates your engaging character, and now you are 'on your guard' you can set him some 'tests' to demonstrate his depth of character.

Keep us posted, (lets hope he's not a member of this community !) Is 'Gwen' a nom-de-plume ?

Gwen 20 May 2007, 14:50

OK seems my date isn't one of you, at least no one who's owning up!!!! Seriously I was trying to make a point and hopefully find out some more. I didn't realise that glasses fetish existed till I found this site. I've read a lot (but nowhere near all) the posts and I'm amazed. I'm a 48 year old divorcee and have recently started to venture out with members of the opposite sex. This one guy, who's actually quite nice spent a fair proportion of one of our dinner dates talking and asking about my glasses and eyesight. It was so blatent that even naive old me began to suspect he might have a "thing" for women in glasses that was perhaps a little out of the ordinary. So I started to trawl the net and it wasn't very long before I came upon Eyescene. The stuff on here is very interesting and I'm still trying to grasp the enormity of this thing for some of you and how it impacts on your lives. Maybe I should just be upfront and ask the guy? Or maybe I should dump him because he obviously only finds me attractive because of my short sightedness?

Clare 20 May 2007, 08:10

Zorab - no it wasn't me, drop temples would be far too outrageous for my conservative style! Must have been before my time.

Zorab 20 May 2007, 01:24

Clare: I was reading about how your script has crept up over the years and it remeinded me that a few years back there was a 'Clare' on this site who was trying to obtain some drop temple frames - was that you ? and if so, did you succeed?

cut-in UK 19 May 2007, 14:49

Methinks the lady doth protest too much !

Gwen 18 May 2007, 15:16

Hmmm I think I've been dating one of you guys off here. He seems to show an inordinate amount of interest in my glasses. Come on, which of you is it?

lazysiow 17 May 2007, 05:35

Maybe you should see her without specs first :D nothing like the mystery and anticipation for when she finally puts them on ;)

Phil 17 May 2007, 01:05

What a ridiculous comment Clare!!! You disappoint? I tell you categorically that you wouldn't. The disappointment would be all yours I assure you. What if I agree "no specs" (hardly a concession for me!!) and raise the offer to a decent lunch? Come on, you know you want to. I certainly do. I've never actually met a self-confessed girly OO. It would be fun.

Clare 16 May 2007, 13:41

Phil - not frightened, but I'd hate to disappoint. And I wouldn't be wearing my glasses!!

Hansel 16 May 2007, 11:14

No problem, Phil!

Blend 37 for me by the way. Not often in the metropolis, possibly only annually, but next time I do I could offer to be chaperone!!

Go well.

Andy 15 May 2007, 13:52

VFL

I know what you mean. I keep looking to see which of those girls I know who are contacts wearers are giving just the tiniest squint in the distance. Tasty.

Then for the rest I just wish they'd have a not too horrible reason to mean they can't wear their contacts, just for a day or two so they'd have to wear their glasses.

In my office recently we've had a couple who were in that situation who were just too vain to wear glasses, but boy did they squint and when they were challenged they made lame comments like my vision's not too bad I just can't wear my contacts right now. Didn't look like that, they must have been suffering, why do they do it?

Phil 14 May 2007, 00:54

Sorry Hansel. That was FROM me TO you!! I need to get the bifocals on.

Hansel 14 May 2007, 00:53

I'd even stretch to a glass of something. But she's frightened of me! Can you believe it in this era of girl-power?

Hansel 11 May 2007, 12:00

Maybe Clare likes tea?

Go well.

;-)

Phil 11 May 2007, 01:04

I've never really "come out" as a mig at work Harriet, even though my rx is now -3.75. So you are asking the wrong chap! I suppose you could say you are doing more driving (at night?) and need the best acuity. Or that you've always been a bit short-sighted and have just decided to go with glasses. I doubt that you'll get detailed cross examination on the reasons. From the sound of you, and the glasses you've ordered, you'll probably just be showered with compliments. If I worked with you I know I'd just be bowled over! And there are lots of chaps like me!

I think that Clare is right that you'll probably end up around -2 to -3. Read lots. It was four years of law books at Oxford that took me from -.5 up to over -2. If you see the number of people who start with specs while at uni I'm sure there's something in the theory that there's a link between close work and myopia.

How are you Clare? We've still not had that coffee!!

Clare 10 May 2007, 14:03

Harriet - I just read your posts and thought I'd share my experience as someone who developed myopia quite late in the scheme of things. I was near your age when I got my first prescription, it was around -1 in one eye and probably -0.75 in the other. I didn't wear them much except for driving at night and my progression was pretty slow. Gradually my prescription crept up in the next few years to -1.25, then -1.75 and into the -2's in my early 30s. Now, nearly 10 years after that original prescription, my rx is 2 diopters stronger. I haven't tried to make that happen because that wasn't what I intended but I thought it might be useful for you - as someone who'd like to wear glasses - to know that even if you start late, it can still progress. I've heard colleagues at work too say that they'd like to need glasses, presumably to be able to accessorise, so you're not alone.

Harriet 10 May 2007, 11:50

No it wasn't me but someone was quoting what I had written before. Don't know why.

I'm not sure I'll wear these fulltime although I dont think I'll have a problem with the lenses being stronger as I've tried on a friend's and could see fine. She does wear hers fulltime so her eyesight must be quite bad. As I said, the 0.75 in the dark made a difference when I was driving but fortunately as its mostly light now I haven't worn them. I really want to wait till I get my new ones to out them with my friends. Funnily enough i seem to have mentally parked the fact that I have glasses because I'm not secretly wearing the 'real' ones. I'm hoping the others will come sometime in the next week so I should probably start fabricating some reasons for needing to get an eye test. Any ideas?

Phil 10 May 2007, 04:11

Is that you Harriet?

10 May 2007, 03:41

I had my test today. As I said it must be 10 years since I last had a test so I was a bit nervous especially as I was trying to fake it a bit. I felt a bit more relaxed when he started putting the lenses in front of my eyes and I was surprised that some of the letters looked blacker.

Phil 10 May 2007, 02:37

Oh Harriet, what you are up to is so exciting. Are you determined to become a fulltime gwg?

You would probably get away with wearing the pair you got from the optician: only OOs like us notice lense strength. Most people would just accept that you needed glasses. I bet you've worn them secretly. That's exactly what I did when I got my first pair years ago. How did you feel inside when you had them on?

How are you going to cope with not being able to see clearly with the stronger lenses? You'll have to be such a good fibber then. The frames you have ordered sound just lovely and will show a bit of thickness.

Colleagues are one thing: in the work context so many people acquire specs and just start wearing them for computer stuff etc. But how are you going to deal with friends and family? Do you have a partner or boyfriend? That's the trickiest bit. Some people are lucky that they have someone they can share their OOishness with. I've never been so lucky. My wife would divorce me if she knew! That's really why I'm here!

Good luck, and keep us informed Harriet. It's going to be such fun for you.

Harriet 09 May 2007, 11:53

Phil

Yes I ordered some stronger ones on line. I added an extra minus diopter and I hope that will make them look necessary. I actually like the pair I bought from the shop too but as they look so weak I have no intention of ever wearing them. The new ones are a rimless pair with blue arms in a narrow rectangular shape, I can't wait for them to arrive! I hope they'll look okay but I think rimless suits most people. I was surprised though that alot of the glasses seemed to suit me in the shop so I must be quite lucky, I heard friends complaining in the past that they can never find anything they like or that they think makes them look cool.

Then of course when they do arrive I have to work out what I will say to my friends who have no clue that I've been for an eye test or got glasses. I'm not very good at lying so I hope I can come up with some believeable story. I'll report back when there's news.

Phil 08 May 2007, 07:06

I've been away and am just catching up with the threads that have spawned in my absence. Harriet, what a truly marvellous gwg you are!! What rx have you ordered in the "stronger" pair? What frames did you get from opticians and what have you ordered on-line? How do you feel wearing specs? I just must know EVERYTHING!!

VFL 07 May 2007, 12:15

Andy, I am fascinated by men who wear contacts. You can tell a lot by the type of contacts they wear. If they are gas perms you can assume the prescription is fairly high. With soft lenses, it's anybody's guess. A wild card so to speak.

Eventually every contact wearer will be outed. Part of the fun is waiting them out.

A man "suddenly" showing up in glasses (with a substantial prescription) is the most delicious thing in the entire world. Bar none. Guaranteed. For you guys, I guess a girl doing the same would "do it" for you. Oh sweet bliss!

Andy 07 May 2007, 08:00

Yes of course you need to know and when you do doesn't it drive you crazy? Sometimes its more about what you don't see than what you do.

hooked 07 May 2007, 05:35

But you need to know that she wears contacts.

If she wears glasses you just see it even from far away (if you need glasses and wear them;) ).

And I don't think that they hate wearing glasses which are just a few of them.

That's not simplistic it's just a different point of view.

Andy 07 May 2007, 05:23

I think you@re being too simplistic about this.

Just think - a girl with cintacts at some stage in the week means a ggirl with glasses. I know beacause I've had a contacts wearing girlfriend and they can't wear the 7 days a week. Plus the mystique of a girl that you know wears contacts, wouldn't you fantastise about that one day a week when they have to wear glasses - and they probably hate that, which makes me love it!

hooked 07 May 2007, 04:52

@Andy

Can you explain why?

There's nothing special if a girl wears contacts.

Harriet 07 May 2007, 03:59

Hi guys

Yes I picked up my glasses. I love the style but they look so weak so Ive ordered some that are stronger from Optical4Less and they should be here within a couple of weeks I hope.

Adam you asked what vision problems I told him I had, he didnt ask and I didnt say, so getting a prescription surprised me. I was nervous before I went in because I suppose I wanted to fake it but I relaxed when he put all the lenses in front of my eyes and forgot about it. He said it was up to me whether I got the glasses or not and I thought about it for a day or so. I decided to get them just to see what they would be like.

Glassesforeveryone & Lazysiow, I really like them but was disappointed that one eye looked so weak. The other I notice a difference when I put them on because the world seems to move. Sounds silly but it feels like that. I tried wearing them for driving at night and for the eye with the -0.75 it improved it but the other was like no difference at all.

I havent told anyone that I have glasses and will wait for my new ones to arrive from Optical4Less before being seen in them. I hope I wont have to wait too long.

Andy 07 May 2007, 03:45

I am fascinated by contacts wearing girls. Anyone else share that?

glassesforeveryone 06 May 2007, 03:42

Hi Harriet,

Did you pikc up your new glasses? How are they?

All4Eyes 01 May 2007, 15:24

My script is r -4.50 l -4.00. I've had glasses since 14 but knew I needed them at 7. My full history is on Bobby's site.

lazysiow 30 Apr 2007, 17:53

Harriet, while they aren't very strong for a first prescription they aren't entirely weak either. -0.75 wasn't far off from your goal of -1. Anyway I bet you'll notice a difference. Let us know how it is :) and at least for now you have the option to whip them off whenever you feel like it

Adam 30 Apr 2007, 17:00

Harriet when asked before the eyetest about any vision problems u were having, what did u say? Also how far down the chart did u say u could see?

glassesforeveryone 30 Apr 2007, 13:42

Hi Harriet,

I am glad you've made a decision! I remember the first pair of glasses I got, I was so worried how the lenses would look! I shouldn't have though... you'll be fine!

Harriet 30 Apr 2007, 11:30

glassesforeveryone

I had a look for some frames at the weekend and decided to go to the place where I had the test last week to buy them. I haven't changed anything so it's just what they prescribed and it's possible they will be ready tomorrow, can hardly believe that! I hope they do look as though they have some prescription in them but you're right I can change or upgrade them in the future.

Thanks to people here I've made the first step, not like the friends who I envy because they need them but better than nothing for sure!

Martyn 30 Apr 2007, 05:18

HI Marie, its ppure nonsense all the things you did to make your eyes weaker, except looking to close at a televison screen or computer screen, all the other things you did would not have caused your eyes to weaken. More than likely you would have had poor vision as you were growing up, but because you tried so many ways to make your vision weaker you now think that was the cause.

Now adays because people are more awre of their eyes and the need for glasses at a younger age the eyes stabilise at an earlier age.

Can I as how big your RX is, and how long you have been wearing glasses. Enjoyed your post. AA

glassesforeveryone 30 Apr 2007, 02:45

Hi Harriet,

Have you made your mind up about what you'll do? That's not the strongest prescription, but it is a prescription!

If you want stronger lenses, it could be possible to alter the prescription and take it to another shop?

That said, why don't you get some frames from the shop, they should do a deal on sunnies at the same time.

They'll be your glasses, no-one can argue with that! You can always get new lenses with a re-glaze service online in a few months.

I think you'll look great, you'll be able to see that there is a prescription there too... plus you'll be able to see that bit better at night and when you're tired.

good luck

All4Eyes 28 Apr 2007, 07:12

Part 2

Anyway, I was about 12 when I first became specifically fixated with STRONG lenses and SEVERE myopia and wanted these attributes for myself. But now looking back I realize that from the time I was very small I did just about everything that's supposed to ruin your eyes, I wore other people's glasses (now it's not so much fun cause most people's glasses that I know are weaker than mine and for me the thrill comes when they're stronger), read in dim light (just can't do that one anymore, I'm afraid!), looked straight at the sun (can't do this anymore, cause now it hurts (didn't use to)!). I know some of the things I did (sitting close to the TV, holding the book close when I read (and maybe even reading so much, period) ) likely resulted FROM my poor vision rather than (or at least, as well as) resulting IN it. But now I wonder if maybe I was, deeply subconsciously, trying to make my eyes worse? Oh, and I've always loved cheese (and hated carrots!), though I hadn't heard about the cheese theory till I came on ES (you've never heard it either? Why, everyone knows eating cheese makes you more nearsighted-that's what happened to the 3 blind mice, they chowed down on cheddar till their retinas detached!). There's really only one thing that's supposed to make you go blind (other than playing with "you'll shoot your eye out" toys like BB guns and such, which is really more a guy thing, well, maybe this other is, too, but...) that I DIDN'T do as a young kid, but after taking it up at 16 I've been making up for lost time, dont know if it's affected my vision, but it feels good, anyway (it's supposed to make you go crazy, too, but frankly I think there are days when I'd go crazy if I DIDN'T do it!). That's probably a little more than y'all wanted to know about me, so until next time...

I ALWAYS make passes at guys who wear glasses, Marie

All4Eyes 28 Apr 2007, 07:11

Part 1

I was just thinking, I wasn't really aware of having any particular desire to be extremely nearsighted or more nearsighted than I was until I was about 12 or so, even though I knew I was myopic by age 7 and had started to enjoy it by age 9. I think part of my brain intuitively knew that the way I felt about nearsightedness and glasses was "abnormal" and since I got particular ("weird") pleasure out of my own, I did not really allow myself to think much about my own visual situation, even though I was admittedly fascinated with vision in general and other people's (though even in that I kept the true intensity of my feelings to myself). I knew I was nearsighted, but I'd never admit I was and certainly I DID NOT need glasses! Never mind the fact that I knew myopia to be a progressive condition and in fact was vaguely aware of the fact that my own "bubble of clear sight" was rapidly shrinking. I just had such a mental block put up to try to protect me from my "weird feelings" that I never even considered just how bad my eyes were finally going to get and how long I thought I could manage without glasses and with increasingly blurred vision. Even with all the little tricks I had to use to keep my near-blindness (an oddly fitting term, seeing (pun intended) as how it's technically the opposite of what my problem was!) from being discovered. Yet I was subconsciously aware of it on several levels. On one level I enjoyed it, on another I was terribly embarrassed by both my myopia and the pleasure I took in it and on yet another I wanted glasses badly (for both fetishistic reasons and because I wanted to actually be able to see clearly!) and felt extremely frustrated by my own shame which blocked me from doing the sensible thing by just going to my parents and saying "Hey, I think I need glasses" and wanted desperately for something to happen that would force me to get glasses-how I longed to fail a school eye test! It was an odd mix of agony (the embarrassment and desperate desire for glasses that I wasn't sure I'd ever bring myself to fulfill) and ecstasy (the wonderful feeling I got from the knowledge that I was (ever increasingly) myopic, even though it wasn't a feeling I allowed myself to fully savor).

28 Apr 2007, 06:13

Harriet - The + astigmatism correction in one eye may help when you are on the computer.

lazysiow 28 Apr 2007, 01:28

Also I think rx sunglasses are quite cheap from various places like optical4less.com , zennioptical.com, lbweyewear.com. These are good alternatives since the mainstream stores still charge an arm and a leg. They'll cost as much as sunnies and you can just tell everyone you got new one :)

lazysiow 28 Apr 2007, 01:27

The sunglasses suggestion is a good idea. You're getting them for distance anyway so they'll help when you're driving etc and no one will think anything of it.

Your prescription is similar to mine (except it goes the other way lol) and I'm still not quite dependent yet even after all these years and minor jumps.

aviator-oo- 27 Apr 2007, 15:33

Harriet (continued). There are others here who can advise better than I as to whether your script might go up over time. Your age will be one factor - I think that myopia usually but not always stabilises by your early twenties. However, you may find that if you wear your glasses all the time, you will start to become dependednt on them. My advice is get some glasses, but just wear them when you want to, and see how it goes. Of course you must be happy with your choice of frames. If you are shy about appearing in front of friends and family wearing glasses, getting tinted lenses and just wearing them as if they were sunglasses might be a way to start. Good luck and enjoy the experience of really sharp vision!

aviator -oo- 27 Apr 2007, 15:27

HARRIET: I was interested in your message as my script as almost exactly the same as yours. In my case, i had several eye tests and found that the advice from the opticians was not quite the same. Some simply said 'you don't need glasses' whilst others said 'you can have them if you want'. My fascination with glasses is such that I really couldn't resist the opportunity to have my very own glasses, but I lacked confidence to say so. Consequently, I ended up telling one optician that I used to have glasses and wanted a replacement just for driving etc, and that is how I got my first pair. I've never worn them much in public, except for some tinted pairs which i treat as sunglasses. It seems to me that if you need lenses to cut down the glare, they might as well be in your prescription.

Harriet 27 Apr 2007, 13:35

OD -0.50 +0.25 150 &

OS -0.75 (nothing else)

He said it was up to me that it is up to me if I get glasses but he gave me a copy of the prescription and I said I'd think about it and go back.

Now I don't know what to do! Even if I get these glasses, do I really need them and will the prescription go up at all in the future?

Cactus Jack 26 Apr 2007, 15:53

Mark-UK,

You are a bit far or longsightedsightes (hyperipic). What that means from a practical standpoint is that at 21 is is not difficult for your crystaline lenses to supply the +0.50 you actually need to focus at a distance and you probably have no problem reading or using a computer because you have a wide focus range.

If you wnat to try minus glasses, could probably try an Rx of:

OD Sphere -1.00, Cylinder -0.25 x 155

OS Sphere -1.00, Cylinder 0.00 or N/A

OD is for the Right Eye, OS is for the Left Eye.

You might consider ordering something relatively inexpensive online so that if you have any problems you are not out very much. I don't know i they ship tot he UK, but Zenni Optical offers some very inexpensive glasses and optical4less (who are know for their quality) offer members a discount.

If you like the minus Rx and have mo problems, you may want to increase it.

If you want to try + glasses, you might consider getting some glasses in your actual Rx. If you do and wear them full time, it is likely that your crystaline lenses are not fully relaxed and that your next exam could result in a bit higher +Rx.

At your age, you might be able to induce a small amount of myopia with some work but you need to make a choice ASAP because one choice is counterproductive for the other.

No matter what you decide, it is important for you to get used to glasses and let others also get used to it.

Use the PD (Pupilary Distance) on the Rx.

ChrisB 26 Apr 2007, 14:14

Mark-UK

your Rx is pretty much the same as mine,or it was, before presbyopia took hold. I know others have suggested doing GOC? But maybe you think it's a difficult step to take and really only for those hard core people who want to sim myopia in double figures.

Although I dont do GOC now, i did so for more than 4 years with very little problem. My friends and family knew that I wore glasses and also knew i did CLs. The fact that you have them both gives the whole thing credibility.

It's unlikely at your age that you will be able to impact your true RX but rather than wear the wrong rx do GOC at maybe -1.5 and have it work OK.

good luck

ChrisB

Mark-UK 26 Apr 2007, 14:06

glassesforeveryone, et al.

I enquired during my lunch hour today about booking an eye test, and Optical Express could fit me in later on! I had my test at 5.00 after work, but unfortunately for all the want of trying, I didn't come away with minus prescription. I said that I'd had trouble with distance at night, and that the red was clearer than green, etc etc, but came away with the following and "You don't require glasses".

R +0.50 Cyl -0.25 155, L +0.50.

I'm probably going to change the plus to a minus and get it made up elsewhere

Cactus Jack 25 Apr 2007, 17:48

Harriet,

Sorry about the typos. If you want a copy of what I am writing, send your email address to cactusjack1928@hotmail.com and I'll send it when it is ready.

Mark-UK, and others,

I'll send you a copy also.

If there is enough interest, maybe Bobby will publish it on his site as non-fiction.C.

Cactus Jack 25 Apr 2007, 17:43

Harriet,

With the short time until you appointment I suggest you just go for the exam. If you want to push it a bit towards minus, you should not try to relax your eyes, but instesd do as much close work and reading as possible prior to the exam. Take a book to rad while waiting. Relaxing as much as possible is best for plus.

I'm working on a piece about eye exams, but it will probably be too long to post here.

Please let us know the outcome of the exam.

John S 25 Apr 2007, 15:05

Actually, I like minus too. But, there is something to be said for peeking over the top of the lenses to see far away. Gives you kind of an intellectual look.

Mark-UK 25 Apr 2007, 14:52

Honestly, I really would prefer minus lenses, I think they look so much better than plus.

I'll have to see what happens.

-Mark

lovegwgs 25 Apr 2007, 14:48

Mark-UK,

John-S is right! However you should think about whether you want magnifying lenses or minifying lenses. John's suggestion will give you the former, which to my mind isn't great... but everyone is different!

John S 25 Apr 2007, 14:43

Mark:

I you really want glasses, and you don't mind if they are for distance or reading. Just go in for the exam, tell the doctor when you read a book or use the computer for a while, you get a headache, and your close up vision gets fuzzy. When you look far away, everything still looks ok. That is a common complaint, because people use computers for extended times, their eyes get tired. There really is not a good test for that type of problem, very easy to glasses that way. Probably throw in that you are a college student, and do lots of studying.

It is much harder to fake a distance rx, any good doctor can tell very easily.

Good Luck

Mark-UK 25 Apr 2007, 14:32

OK, I might give D&A; a go.

I've always liked glasses, and people round me have had them, then don't wear them much, and I've always envied them (odd I know). I've usually managed a quick 'lets have a look through your glasses' when people get new ones, but thats only seconds. I want to wear them all the time, and to my own prescription, and my own choice of frames!

glassesforeveryone 25 Apr 2007, 14:29

Hi Mark,

I've found Dolland & Aitchson the most 'forgiving'. Give them good reason as to why you have booked the test. Relax your eyes to a sort of slighlty non-focused state and you'll be fine, in my experience.

Tell any friends that you've been struggling for a while but were a little embarrased to say anything before.

It is amazing how quickly people accept you wearing glasses. It's just having the confidence to wear them that I struggle with!

So, why do you want to wear glasses. any clue?

Mark-UK 25 Apr 2007, 14:24

Hi Glassesforeveryone,

I'd love to wear glasses, I think I'm going to book an eye test for next week some time, and will try my best at exaggerating.

I'll tell people that I'm going to have a test, then if there's no precsription given, I shall pretend that there was and order online, saying because it's a lot cheaper than the shop.

What opticians have you used? High street names or local independents?

glassesforeveryone 25 Apr 2007, 14:20

Hi Mark-UK,

Being 21 you can become myopic. It is purely a case of getting glasses and wearing them. It's a bit like learning a language, emmerse yourself!

I got glasses through exagerating any fuziness... give it a go.

I will dig out the online UK etailer I used successfully for you.

glassesforeveryone 25 Apr 2007, 14:15

Hi Harriet,

I can see better than a lot of non-glasses-wearers without glasses, and I can wear glasses that 'non-glasses-wearers' would say, "wow,they're strong".

There is a definite paradox there.

I probably 'need' very weak glasses, but like you I want to really need glasses.

I find that if I work on the PC without glasses I get eyestrain, I guess therefore I'm slightly astigmatic. Then again all eyes are slightly astigmatic.

Cactus Jack will be responding soon I'm sure. Don't worry, you'll do fine - don't put yourself in a situation you are not entirely comfortable with, if you don't want to fake it then don't.

I just think you probably want a particular frame style, you can't do that through a website, you need to seem them on your face!

I really do hope you get what you want from the experience. Good luck.

Mark-UK 25 Apr 2007, 14:08

Hi there

I'm similar to Harriet in that I also really, really want glasses. I have done for quite a long time, but unfortunately my vision is good. My last test was 2yrs ago at Specsavers, so I'm due a test now anyway. Has anybody here successfully got glasses or increased their prescriptions by saying you can't read things during the eye test that you actually can?

Also, my family/friends assume I have good eyesight, so how would it be explained if I suddenly turned up in glasses (I'd love to!)

For the record, I'm 21 yrs old

Harriet 25 Apr 2007, 14:08

lovegwgs

I will see how it goes, I had not really thought that people might treat me differently at all if I had glasses but wearing them would be a very new experience for me.

Harriet 25 Apr 2007, 14:05

glassesforeveryone

I find guys with glasses pretty attractive if they have good frames, I don't like any that look too thick or old fashioned, they must suit with stylish clothes and hairstyle then I think they compliment the look. That's what I'd like to do too, I don't want to look like a librarian that's not my look at all!

So you do have prescribed glasses. Do you feel you really need them? If yes, why don't you wear them, I guess your friends are used to seeing them. I don't really just want to buy some I'd like to feel like they really are necessary. The idea of going to an optician sort of frightens me as I can't really remember what to expect. I hope Cactus Jack can come back with some tips before I go!

glassesforeveryone 25 Apr 2007, 13:59

and to prove it. The gwgs in the apprenetice has just been F.I.R.E.D.

:o(

http://www.bbc.co.uk/apprentice/

glassesforeveryone 25 Apr 2007, 13:57

I am in the UK, in Bristol.

25 Apr 2007, 13:47

Glassesforeveryone, are you in the UK?

lovegwgs 25 Apr 2007, 13:38

Harriet, you should get glasses asap.. and then let us know how you feel about wearing them and how people treat you differently.

glassesforeveyone, wear your glasses out man!! Why bother otherwise?

glassesforeveryone 25 Apr 2007, 13:03

sorry, forgot to say:

I DO actually wear my glasses infront of people, at home & in work, but not out and about...

Also, you said you like the whole librarian, serious/attractive thing. Do you mean by that what you'd like to achieve in your own look?

And finally, out of interest, are you attracted to other people partly because they wear glasses?

glassesforeveryone 25 Apr 2007, 12:56

Hi Harriet,

I don't think I do need glasses, I wear them when driving/reading/computer. Weirdly, I don't wear them in front of friends because I am too self-concious about them(!). My prescription is -0.75 both eyes, with -0.5 astigmatism in one eye 0.75 in the other (from last eye test, not faked). So, not very strong, I wish I could get (need) stronger lenses!

Another strange thing is that although I think glasses make a girl look better, I think that boys look worse, so by chosing to wear glasses I am deliberately detracting from my appearance. I'm sure you'll look great with glasses though :o)

Cactus Jack is the expert when it comes to optometry, but I can tell you my experience.

I am 31 and so am not much older than you, so my preogression in the last couple of years is something you could expect.

I had my first eyetest in 1996, I passed it with no problem whatsoever, I was disapointed to say the least.

I went back 2 years later and managed somehow to get a prescription of +0.5 each eye -0.25 left eye. Which was very strange as I was trying to get a myopic prescription! (I just said I couldn't see some things I could).

Over the years I have managed to 'up' my prescription by doing the things I explained in an earlier post. I could have ordered glasses online by entering my prescription, but I thought it would be easier to send a 'copy' of my prescription with an old frame.

This leads me to your question of CJ. I would say try the things I mentioned, within reason, and remember an optician wouldn't think you are cheating, why on earth would you? Say you've booked the test because you are getting headaches and in the evening you are struggling to read teletext on the tv. This will get them thinking slight myopia...

If you can get any prescription, no matter how slight, then that's great as you can choose a frame in the shop. That's why I think you should try this. I couldn't order a pair of frames online and have any idea of whether they'd suit me!

Then, once you've got frames, see how you get on and do what I did and send off the frames with a faked prescription to an online etailer.

I think you could get away with -1.5 in both eyes.

My prescription has gone up by about a factor of 2 in the last 3 years. I am sure I could handle -2, -0.5/75 easily enough. In fact, what am I waiting for?

I can't wait for that book Cactus Jack!

Harriet 25 Apr 2007, 11:52

Cactus Jack

I have a test booked on Friday. What should I do, am I trying to fail it or just seeing what happens? Sorry that sounds rather pathetic. If -1 is weak my friends glasses would be more than that, any guesses what they might be?

glassesforeveryone

Yes, its a strange thing for me too. I have quite a few friends who wear glasses now and I think they somehow add to how they look. I think some can look pretty uninteresting but it also adds a sense of mystery somehow. Perhaps its the old jokes about librarians and school teachers that has influenced me. Plus they can make a girl look more serious, attractive. Do you need glasses or do you just wear them because you like them?

glassesforeveryone 25 Apr 2007, 11:01

Harriet,

You did post on the psychology of glasses thread, so I guess I can ask?

Why do you want to wear glasses? I'm not sure I can answer the question of why I 'choose' to wear glasses, so it would be interesting to understand why someone else would want to wear glasses.

I've wanted to wear glasses since childhood, between about the age of 12 to 15, I honestly can't remember when exactly.

There was a girl in my class, up to the age of 9, who I was attracted to (even at that age!) who wore glasses. Then throughout school I was always attracted to the girls that wore glasses.

So, glasses are a key thing, but I'm not attracted to glasses, that said they are one of the most important factors in making a girl attractive to me.

...weird!!

Cactus Jack 25 Apr 2007, 08:19

Harriet,

When you get the appointment, let us know when you are scheduled for some specific tips.

Some day, I want to write something on how to study for an eye exam.

Cactus Jack 25 Apr 2007, 08:12

Harriet,

Glasses with -1.00 are considered a low Rx. Without an exam, they are low enough to find out how comfortable you are wearing them while reading or using the computer.

Harriet 24 Apr 2007, 22:19

Thank you both , I will make an appointment for a test today.

Cactus Jack you say I should go for a -1, I don't know how strong that would be. My friend wears glasses pretty much 24/7 can you guess what might the strength of her glasses be? I could see through these for the short time I wore them.

glassesforeveryone, do you also do this? That's good to know.

I will post the results of my test in the 'induced myopia' section as you suggest.

glassesforeveryone 24 Apr 2007, 14:11

Hi Harriet,

I am exactly the same as you. I would recommend going for a test, it's good to get an idea of whether there is any base prescription you can build upon.

You can even cheat in the eye test. Try to unfocus your eyes slightly when the optician looks into your eyes. Say you can't see the last line you actually can, etc.

With the red/green test, opt for the red circles a couple of times when they look the same.

Anyway, go for the test. You should get a prescription card even if there is no prescription.

Then, simply do the old trick of tipex/pen and photocopying the card. You can then send that off to an online opticians and you'll be fine, or even better you might just need glasses.

Good luck!

Cactus Jack 24 Apr 2007, 12:46

Harriet,

Because of your age and family history it will not be easy nor is it likely to be very effective. Ideally, you should condider an eye exam just to be sure that you really don't need some correction. However, you should be aware that opticians in the UK seem to underprescribe according to many posts.

As an alternative, you could order some glasses online from an online retailer. I would suggest sphere no more than -1.00 with no cylinder if you choose not to get an exam. Consider optical4less and choose an attractive frame.

Let me know what you would like to do and if you need help.

I would suggest moving to the "Induced Mypoia" thread or if you wish, contact me privately at cactusjack1928@hotmail.com

Harriet 24 Apr 2007, 11:57

Hi.I am 29, I live in the UK and I work in an office. I last had an eye test when I was 18 I think, nothing since because I havent had any problem with my eyes and my family history is good. I have tried on my friends glasses, she is shortsighted (makes things smaller) and I could see through them okay although I didnt wear them for long. What do I need to do?

Cactus Jack 23 Apr 2007, 15:27

Harriet,

Some questions:

Do you want to wear plus or minus glasses? Plus is for hyperopia or far or longsightedness. Minus is for myopia or near or shortsightedness. Some myopia might be possible depending on several factors

1. What is your age?

2. What is your occupation? If a student, field of study and year?

3. Have you ever had an eye exam?

4. Do you presently have any difficulty reading distant signs in low light conditions or reading or using a computer for long periods?

5. Does you mother, father, brothers or sisters wear glasses?

6. Where do you live? (country)

Hansel 23 Apr 2007, 14:13

Perhaps a daft question but have you had an eye test recently? You might find that you do get a prescription.

Harriet 23 Apr 2007, 12:21

Cut In UK

Yes I want to actually need them. What would I need to do?

cut-in UK 22 Apr 2007, 13:30

Harriet, is it the desire to be wear glasses, as some of your friends do, or is it that you desire to wear them, as if you need them ( which it seems you don't, without some adjustment to your eyesight )

Have you thought of GOC ? It's just that you seem to strongly wish to be a glasses-wearer, and it is a solution, if you want to 'need' glasses and you don't want to pretend.

Harriet 22 Apr 2007, 07:47

I can relate to that but think I'm weirder. I don't need glasses but get kind of jealous of my friends who do. That can't be right can it? I don't want to just pretend either, I really do envy them.

ChrisB 20 Apr 2007, 16:05

Absence of glasses syndrome??

What, you ask is AGS?

It describes the effect that occurs when someone who grew up wearing glasses switches to contact lenses and is only ever seen as a non glasses wearer. Their social interaction is therefore no longer that of a glasses wearer but doesn't quite match the normal behaviour of a non glasses wearer.

Thinking back I can think of a number of people who technically fall into the AGS category and have similar traits.

Galileo 20 Apr 2007, 09:23

Hi Clare, my script is -1.75 and -1.50 with astigmatism in one eye, which seems to cancel out the myopia if I tilt my head back at an angle when watching presentations etc. It's been stable for about 15 years now and though I've had glasses all that time I only wear them for driving at night and watching gothic movies (films where the action takes place in low light or the dark)

I can interpret the blur pretty well too, so rarely feel the need to wear them at other times.

Clare 18 Apr 2007, 12:34

Tom - I actually know this guy's prescription is the same as me, what I'm fascinated by is the fact that up until some months ago he never wore glasses in the gym. I'd just like to know whether he was wearing contacts or bare eyed.

Galileo - I agree, giving some information about oneself is a great way to encourage someone else to reveal something. For some of us though it's difficult to start the conversation, I have a couple of female friends that I'm happy to discuss vision with but wouldn't start the conversation. Interesting your comments about myopia helping avoid reading glasses, my optician told me that years ago but I didn't realise what he meant, what's your rx?

Clare 18 Apr 2007, 12:34

Galileo 18 Apr 2007, 09:00

On the subject of how to get into a conversation about eyesight:

I was out with a friend of a friend last night. A woman I had never met before and we were discussing the trip she was on which had brought her into contact with me. We talked about drink and the consequences and she said she had been found by her room mate asleep with her glasses on after one evening of indulgence.

She was not wearing glasses so I said have you worn contact lenses here since most of my work colleagues didn't because the climate and dust made them problematic. She said she did wear contacts and thought she was not having problems because her lenses were custom made and therefore the fit was very good. She said her eyesight was pretty poor and she wore them virtually all the time. I said I was lucky in that I was short-sighted enough not to need reading glasses despite my age but not short-sighted enough to feel the need to wear glasses all the time for distance. She said she was functionally blind without correction. I said a bit more and brought my prescription into the conversation and she responded by saying she was -10 with high astigmatism.

A great conversation and a great evening. I think the key is to offer information about yourself first, and not even ask for the other person to respond. They often feel obliged to tell you the same "secret" piece of information you have just shared about yourself.

Good luck!

Tom 18 Apr 2007, 01:29

Clare, an approach if you dont want to seem too much interested in his eyesight, could be start speaking of your own vision. I understood you usually go to the gym bare eyed, so nothing simpler than ask him if he can see/read something for you, since you dont have your own specs/contacts. This will reveal you if he is going around with some correction or not and (most probably) will force him to say something about his vision. If this doesnt work, you can comment like You are very lucky in having a good vision, unfortunately thats not my case and this should cause him to give up definitely. Once you have both revealed to each other than you are shortsighted, it should be simple to compare prescriptions, and so on. On the other way, if you have your own contacts on or dont want to discover him your own myopia (although 2.75 as you have is usually easy to be discovered sooner or later, at least for a trained observer), you can comment the first time you meet him as Hey, I didnt notice you wear/dont wear glasses, do/dont you wear them full time? (according if he is in glasses or not). A more subtle way to introduce the subject, in case you suspect that he has some degree of uncorrected myopia when he dont wear glasses, could be to force him to admit he cannot see, e.g. by showing him something to read at a distance. But if you are an experienced glasses spotter (and it seems so) you will be able to notice if he doesnt see correctly even from its usual behaviour (squinting, getting closer, ecc). By the way, Im assuming he is shortsighted and not farsighted, is this right?

Clare 17 Apr 2007, 11:34

Tom - I mentioned a gorgeous guy, sometimes wearer of glasses, on the other thread. You seem an expert on starting conversations about glasses, how can I engage him in some discussion of his prescription and switch between glasses/contacts? I'm fascinated to know if he's had an increase or just used to wear contacts in the gym.

Clare 17 Apr 2007, 11:31

I'm back in the office after a couple of disjointed weeks working overseas. In a long and boring meeting today I thought of folks here as I passed the time counting the number of glasses wearers amongst the participants. I counted 2 contacts wearers including myself, the other I can tell must wear hard lenses as she blinked alot; 2 female presbyopes, one a very new wearer with some stylish half glasses, the other I've known for a while, glasses are rimless and a tad too large,both are attractive so you'd like that; the usual 50-something men with readers, 3 of them. And just 2 myopes, that's unusual where I work. And one attractive guy worth mentioning, sadly no glasses ... yet!!

Tom 02 Apr 2007, 01:52

As you may know from my past posts, I found girls or women dealing with some degree of uncorrected myopia (or hyperopia, although this is by far less common) as the most interesting subject to spot around. So I cannot but suggest to everyone who does not wear glasses ful time, to go on resisting to them. I can understand that with higher prescription than about -2 this can be an issue, and almost impossible on a regular basis for prescriptions higher than say -3 (apart from Phil, the bravest I ever known!). In this cases, my suggestion is to make the shortest possible use of glasses, just for those situations in which you rellay need them to survive. In fact, while you may want to see clearly at a presentation, or to watch movies or TV, you don't need a perfect vision to walk or (for us myopes) read a book, work with a PC or eat at a restaurant. Moreover, play with your glasses on and off is a significant add-on to glasses fashion, much more that wear them full time (at least for my feeling). So, my advice to Phil and everybody other not wearing full time (especially females!) is to not discard glasses completely or left them at home, but use them just when really needed.

On the topic of comment: I like comment on other people's glasses because I'm factinating with every glasses related issue. I've known very few bespectacled people I haven't asked (sooner or later) for their prescription. Few times I have been asked about by own glasses, but I don't have any reclutance to tell.

Clare 29 Mar 2007, 11:12

Hanna, Bob W - undoubtedly there are people who feel uncomfortable with glasses as there are people who think they are too tall/thin/fat I suppose. I think if someone can get over the glasses feeling like a weakness it must be fine, after all look at the number of people who wear glasses with very small prescriptions because they like the way they look.

No question that the getting over people's reactions is the biggest problem, after that if they look good they *can* be a fashion accessory. I like that idea but haven't yet totally bought into it myself!

Bob W. 28 Mar 2007, 14:03

Hi Clare and Phil!

Hanna has a good point. Familiarity breeds ?boredom? Psychologically, we tend to make connection with people by eye contact, thus placing importance and attention to that part of a person. Changes in appearance there are much more likely to be noticed, I believe. I think that straining to see, much less squinting, or moving up much closer to see, is quite noticeable to others who know us, especially other myopes, not to just us glasses obsessed.

If the above holds at all, then these behaviors and only occasionally showing up in glasses would draw all kinds of unwanted attention to exactly what one would be trying to avoid, most unfortunately. Maybe the human psyche is simply wired to hone in on details about the other person's eyes?

Clare, it's unfortunate that getting caught squinting has such devastating results. I simply can't resist the attraction, and have been caught staring. The discomfort of the women, or contempt on the part of a boyfriend in 1 case, are obvious. I haven't managed the socially appropriate behavior of looking away, much less apologizing. It is sadistic to catch someone when they feel quite vulnerable or in a weak position. By my twisted mind, I'm experiencing it as the woman overcoming that, as in damn the glasses!, or so what if I'm myopic, I'm not blind or helpless! Thus I don't experience the woman sensing vulnerability, otherwise I would certainly instantly be very uncomfortable. Sorry for such a long post.

Best regards,

Bob W.

hanna 28 Mar 2007, 13:18

Clare, Phil - the people asking about my prescription were my friends so maybe they thought the weren't getting too personal. I feel sensitive about my glasses, though. One of these incidents was in a party and my friend must have thought it was weird that I didn't take my glasses off there. Then she needed something to small-talk about...

However, I still have some kind of need to prove that I can manage without glasses, especially if somebody asks about it. When without glasses I rather squint than ask someone. Maybe Phil feels something similar, that going fulltime would be admitting your weakness?

Clare 28 Mar 2007, 11:31

Phil - I think there are some things that are very personal - think weight, age as just a couple of examples - and this is another that can make some people (we know who they are) feel uncomfortable. But then some people are just more direct than others I suppose.

Phil 28 Mar 2007, 01:12

Or are we the strange ones for caring Clare? If someone asked how tall you are or what your ring size is, you'd just answer wouldn't you? And not post about it.

Hanna, you are just stronger than me! Though starting in a new workplace obviously helped.

I remember trying to go fulltime 20 years ago. On the first night I went for a drink with 2 friends who wore fulltime (the girl was gorgeous!). I kept taking the new specs (-2.75 I think) on and off. The conversation was glasses-based for ages. The girl said she wasn't too short-sighted but was fulltime because she couldn't be bothered with taking her (very attractive) specs on and off. Her (then) boyfriend agreed (they have since been married and divorced!). I just knew I could never think like that! The rest is history.

Clare 27 Mar 2007, 13:52

Phil - don't you get headaches with all that squinting?? And people do notice squinters, remember the embarrassing comment I got in the gym? A friend of mine who had to wear old glasses for a few days after she lost her regular pair complained of headaches as a result.

Hannah - can you remember what made people ask how strong your glasses were? I'd never do that! Was it because you were without them and couldn't see something, or were they just generally interested? Isn't people's behaviour strange!

hanna 27 Mar 2007, 10:36

Phil, first I only wore them all the time in the workplace. Everyone there was new to me so it was kind of easy and no one commented. Then I just realized the difference between sharp and blurry vision was getting annoying. When I was with friends somebody would sometimes tell me to wear my glasses because I couldn't see something. So it was more like that the comments stopped when I went full time!

Now that I think about it I remember a few times when somebody enquired how strong my glasses were. That made me feel like taking my glasses off. However, not being able to see was more annoying at that point so I didn't care.

Phil 27 Mar 2007, 01:18

Hanna, Well you'd love me then!! Though I think I'm just going to have to go fulltime soon, whatever I feel. There must come a point (and I think I've reached it) where a myope cannot function uncorrected. My nose is touching the computer screen, I just have to give up looking at presentations, I have to guess train platforms (with disastrous consequences more than once), and I miss out on so many pretty girls in glasses.

As I've said, when I get the new glasses (which are going to be at least -3.75, if not -4) they are going on at the optician's and staying on!

How did you cope going fulltime? Did you go for bold frames or some you hoped no-one would notice. And how did you cope with the compliments?!

Fritz 26 Mar 2007, 12:49

Phil: I always find your position re glasses fascinating, especially since you're a lawyer and glasses predominate in that profession. I always love to watch guys fight their myopia and then finally give into glasses. One twenty-something in my club was always squinting and just recently got some glasses which really don't suit him. (I'm not sure if any pair would really suit him.) Interesting to watch him go fulltime over the last several weeks. Last Friday he wasn't wearing them to play squash, but yesterday he was. They're not especially strong, but I think there is a fair amount of astigmatism correction in them. His squash partner is also fighting glasses. I'm sure he is also quite astigmatic since he squints at things which are really quite close like a sandwich only several feet in front of him. I'm sure he'll be wearing glasses before too much longer.

Let us know when you go for that eye exam. One of my best friends is -4.50 (and due for an increase!) and rarely wears his glasses into the clubs. Somehow he seems to manage as it seems you do.

hanna 26 Mar 2007, 12:17

Phil I think your situation is very interesting. For some reason i've always liked men who try to cope without their glasses. I wear glasses myself and I can identify with your vanity issue, however I got past it at 17 already ;) I avoided wearing my then -3.25 glasses as much as possible but then I got a job where I simply had to see clearly and so I went full time pretty soon. I think my friends had already gotten used to my needing glasses and I remember very few comments. Living got much easier with full time wear. When you're nearsighted many simple normal things get problematic! I'm interested in how do you cope with the blur. Do you squint to see writings and such or do you just accept it that you don't see?

Phil 26 Mar 2007, 10:53

You are right of course Katy. But your saying that is just like a reformed alcoholic telling an unreformed one to cut out the booze!

I'm going to get a new pair of glasses: I suspect I'm up to -4 or pretty damn close. And then I'll have a real go at it. I need to do something: my nose is virtually on the computer screen! And I hardly recognise anyone in the street. I can't even tell if a girl is a gwg or not until I am embarrassingly close! I have to put them on to function in shops and restaurants.

But I may well bottle out at work as I have always done before. Any techniques to guarantee success this time?

Katy 26 Mar 2007, 10:12

Phil - that must have been pretty terrifying, wearing them to give a lecture! But if you have done that, and your colleauges saw you, then surely you have got past the most difficult bit. The comments really do stop after the first couple of days if you start wearing them all the time, whereas if you only put them on occasionally (as I used to), then you get a lot more comments - you're really drawing attention to them. What worked for my ex, who was a bit shy about his, was leaving the case at home. Just keep them on and put yourself out of your misery!

Puffin 26 Mar 2007, 06:17

Mostly I've found the few people that want to talk about glasses etc aren't that interesting to me. :(

lazysiow 26 Mar 2007, 02:34

aye but that's because you're a strange man on the internet, and women aren't usually likely to meet us because we carry axes, rape and plunder and molest children.

but here we do it in glasses ;)

Phil 26 Mar 2007, 02:27

Clare, you are so right. But I, at least, am too old to change now.

Sarah, I wish your optimism was well-founded. But it isn't. I went to a conference with a rather odd woman who had been my assistant for a year a while before. I got out the (then) minus 3s to see the whiteboard; and my goodness did she start! "I didn't know you wore glasses.", "How long have you had them?", "Do you need them to read?" etc etc. She's a plus wearer and maybe she is interested in such things. But I am very definitely not interested in her and just wished she would shut up.

On another occasion, morerecently, I wore the (by then) minus 3.5s to give a lecture to an audience that included a number of members of my office. I had to in case there were any questions and I couldn't see the questioner! The next day the boss came to see me and started in similar vein. He added "I've known you need glasses for years.", "You always squint." and "I'm glad you've started wearing them."

All that was enough to drive me back to the security of being bare-eyed. Does no-one apart from Clare understand? I can't believe she and I are the only ones afflicted. I've met a couple of people, all women, who seemed to. I find it so important and helpful to talk to someone who does. Hence my coffee invites to Clare! All in vain, however!!

Sarah 25 Mar 2007, 14:23

I would only expect that they would say something like ~ I like your glasses or are they new glasses.

Someone asking questions about how long you had them or whether you squint without them would be too much. If they knew you well enough they would know if they were new so they wouldnt need to ask basic question and if they didn't know you well enough they should just assume that you often wear them and so they should say how great they are.

Clare 25 Mar 2007, 10:34

Phil - it is a *madness* that afflicts us! I look at my friends who make no issue of glasses at all and recognise its in the mind. And by the way, no change with me!!

Phil 25 Mar 2007, 09:20

I'll take that as a compliment!! I'm actually so normal and conventional apart from my glasses thing. I think you and I are rather similatr except that you got out of the problem by embracing the demon contacts. If we ever met we could both wear specs in completete comfort. When I once went away with a gwg girlfriend for a perfect weekend in the Lakes we both wore fulltime! I couldn't see a thing when the specs came off!

Clare 25 Mar 2007, 08:28

Phil - of course, on a personal level I agree with you, no comment is more comfortable but it's not human nature is it? We react to things don't we? By not reacting, as I did, we show that we are somehow embarrassed too. As it happens, I wasn't in that situation because there were too many people, but if one of my colleagues appeared in glasses I would feel bound to pay them a compliment .. but if it were me, I would die from embarrassment!

Honestly, do you really think you will ever go full time?? You really should but, given your reluctance, unless you had some dramatic increase, I can't see it happening. But you should of course, you really are very unusual!!

Phil 25 Mar 2007, 07:59

Hi Clare. I'd prefer that it passed without comment. I hate it if anyone says anything especially if they ramble on "how long have you worn them?", "are they just for reading?", "I saw you'd been squinting" etc.

I'm going to be in for so much of this when I finally go full-time. And it can't be far away. I'm now creeping towards minus 4. And I'm finding reading so much better with some minus 2s. I'd always thought I could read bare-eyed. But the print is blacker and sharper with specs.

I'm in the office today all alone. And I've worn the readers all day. And my varifocals to and from work. But tomorrow it will be back to squinting!

How are you with wearing glasses now?

Clare 25 Mar 2007, 07:26

How do you react when you see someone for the first time with glasses??

I met up with someone that I haven't seen for a long time, years in fact. She'd mentioned before that she was getting 'very shortsighted' and on another occasion that she wore contacts. Since we see each other so rarely, and since she was wearing contacts on the last occasion we met, I assumed she always wore contacts. We met in a group and - to my surprise -she was wearing glasses. Of course, I didn't comment although I might have if we'd not been withother people, though I can't say for sure.

Isn't it really subjective? For someone who rarely wears glasses that appears wearing them, I think it deserves a comment,a compliment of course. In this case, where I don't know whether someone wears them regularly because we've not met in an age, I think it's different but it got me thinking ....

Then again, when I feel *required* (by circumstances described above) to make a comment I always feel uncomfortable even though I'll make sure it's a compliment that I give. Anyone else think about this sort of stuff?

Tom 19 Jan 2007, 05:25

Sophie: sorry, I forgot your name and did not check again your history in the past posts before replying one hour ago. I apologize.

Are you really in trouble reading without glasses? With your -3 eye you should not have major issues... I can read fine without glasses and have almost exactly your prescription (-3 with 0.25 astigmatism, in my right eye). Wouldn't you like try removing your glasses for a while? You could find you are all but helpless! Which is your job? Are yout still a student?

Cheers.

Tom 19 Jan 2007, 04:12

Sophie, which is you prescription right now? Don't you have any experience without glasses to report recently (out of need, vanity or simply fun)?

Bye,

Tom

Sophie 18 Jan 2007, 12:41

My ideal prescription on a man... lets say around -6... the "dependance" factor is somewhat important for me, but I really pity guys who cannot see well even with their glasses on (although I still find them cute), so my ideal prescription is more moderate.

Tom:

I've had glasses since I was seven (I'm almost twenty now) but I refused to wear them full-time, because I got teased about them at school. First I hardly wore them at all, then, when I was around 10, I found I needed them for schoolwork because otherwise I couldn't see the blackboard. I started wearing them fulltime when I was 12 (I am not sure about my prescription, but it was around -2.50, I think). after going to summer camp that year and having trouble participating in some of the games because of my blurry vision, I decided to wear them full time as soon as I was home again.

now I wear glasses full time... I cannot even read properly without them, since my astig gives me a headache. sometimes I wear contacts but I find them really uncomfortable. my optician also says that my eyeballs have a strange shape, so that it is rather hard to find contacts that fit. I tried over-the-counter-contacts from the supermarket once. It was terrible...

Katy 14 Jan 2007, 08:18

Cut-in, no, I don't have any problems reading with the -3 glasses. I don't read without glasses - my astigmatism is enough to make text slightly blurry. I do already go around with a couple of dioptes extra, like you say, but if I was to do GOC it would be with much stronger lenses, to make it worth the hassle - and I'm sure that would be noticeable! I think for me, it is the desire to have a 'real' rx, rather than to look more myopic - I wouldn't want to be much more than -3 or 4.

cut-in UK 13 Jan 2007, 10:29

Katy, some questions; you seem to be able to wear overcorrection. Does it cause problems at near distance, for reading, or do you merely take off your glasses. Your true Rx should allow perfectly good near vision without. Also, it it the desire to look more myopic which drives you to overcorrect. You also suggest that if you left the house you'd get 'caught' Who would notice a couple of dioptres anyway ? Would you really care anyway?

It seems to be part of the thrill, going about with an increased prescription, and seeing whether anyone remarks on it; at which point you say something technical to confound the person, and hoping they're not an optometrist!

-5.00 who luvs gwgs 13 Jan 2007, 07:49

For me the ideal rx for my partner would be -10.00 to -15.00 naturally with no eye problems apart from high myopia of course

Puffin 11 Jan 2007, 17:21

I think the optician would not believe you if you told him thicker was better anyway.

Katy 11 Jan 2007, 14:44

Hi cut-in - I haven't tried GOC but I would be interested to see what it's like. I don't think I'd dare leave the house though! My real rx is now around -1.75 with cyl -0.5R and -1.25L, although it was -1.00 (& cyl) for years until I started wearing stronger lenses. I have lots of different pairs of glasses that go from -2 to -3, which I alternate, but my favourites at the moment are -2.50, which I got a couple of weeks ago from 39dollarglasses - really nice dark brown plastic frames.

Its a shame your wife doesn't like the -6s, although its good that she doesn't mind the GOC. My boyfriend wears -6s, and I think they're fantastic, although as I said before, I wouldn't mind if they went up a bit :-) Are your rimless ones CR39? We tried to get rimless -6s in that but the optician thought they would be too thick for the screw to fit through. He also said my boyfriend 'wouldn't be happy with how they would look'.. litle does he know that in our house, the thicker the better :-)

cut-in UK 11 Jan 2007, 14:10

Hi Katy, yes, I alternate GOC between -6.0 and -3.5, mostly the latter which my wife prefers. She is OK with it as I actually see better, self prescribing, and also, I ditched the varifocals(progressives) in my true Rx which is -0.5/+2.0 add, (which I hated) in favour of 24mm deep S/V lenses in a Gucci frame. ( For an old'n, they still attract a few compliments) The good thing about monovision, is that you can choose shallow lenses, that you wouldn't get as progressives.

However, I just love my -6.0's in a plain hingeless, rimless style. Power rings galore and a decent cut-in. My wife thinks they are too strong, so I may re-order from O4Less in 1.74 ultra hi-index, just to keep her happy. Are the English mad or what ?

Do you do GOC or are you a straight OO with a prescription to match ?

VFL 11 Jan 2007, 13:54

Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could do that in real life? Choose our partner's prescription, that is?

I'd go with R sph.-5.50 /-1.50 cyl.

L sph. 5.75 / -1.75 cyl.

How's that?

Katy 11 Jan 2007, 11:59

Cut-in UK, you do full-time GOC? Wow. What rx? What does your wife think about it? I am really interested in how people's partners react to being with an OO - some seem perfectly happy about it and others react badly, or don't even know. I am lucky with my boyfriend, he sees my OO-ness as an attractive quirk, but he does worry when I up my rx with every new pair of glasses - he thinks I will get caught :-)

cut-in UK 11 Jan 2007, 11:16

Katy, yes my wife is slightly myopic, Rx -2.0 and -1.0 so does wear glasses, for driving and watching television. They correct her distance vision, but she can read without glasses, using 'monovision' as one of her eyes shuts down for reading and her brain adapts to using one eye only, when she focuses on near objects.

This seems, now, to be an accepted technique amongst optometrist prescribing, but it doesn't work for everybody. I use it too for my full-time GOC with one eye permanently on 'distance' and one on 'near vision'. I,m 57 and my wife, a year younger. (though she could easily pass for 45, on a good day!) I only have a mind like Peter Pan, and probably look my age. My greatest wish is that she could become an OO as I am. As it is, she has no interest and resists any artificial aids, believing (correctly) that exercising ciliary muscles will prolong the ability to focus without the need for plus correction. What's a fellow to do ? !!!!!

Katy 11 Jan 2007, 08:43

I would choose -9 or 10 for my boyfriend, in low index, with polished edges :-) He could have a pair of high index ones too. Cut-in - does your wife have glasses? You have probably already said, somewhere else :-)

Phil 11 Jan 2007, 01:27

For me between -3 and -4 makes a perfect gwg. It is likely to mean she is full-time and dependant; but the lenses still do not distort the underlying beauty of her eyes and face or look too heavy. To my taste too many power rings can be unappealing. Do you think that the fact that this preference accords with my own rx is significant? I'm not sure. I always liked minus gwgs, even before I wore glasses myself, though I think that, over the years, a slightly stronger minus rx has come to appeal to me. The other thing that has changed as I have got older is that I can find plus lenses attractive, especially in pretty young presbyopes. I'm convinced that that is an "age thing": most women of my age or 5 or so years younger are now wearing reading specs if they are not myopic. But a 45-year old presbyope is not usually the stuff of dreams for a much younger chap.

Dave 10 Jan 2007, 21:24

I prefer minus lenses in the mid range of 3 - 5. I wear glasses myself with no sphere but have enough astigmatism (minus 2) to need glasses for certain things. Now I just wear them all the time. I too always wanted to be nearsighted.

4iii 10 Jan 2007, 17:31

Cut In, no I have never tried GOC,wuld not know where to start, never visited an optician ot had my eyes test except once at school. I glad there is a sight like this kids at school who needed to wear glasses were the but of cruel jokes, today fortunately with modern lens technology and hi index lenses glasses can be a fahion statement.Anything I know about glasses was taught to me by my ex. I could never get my head round why she could not see an inch in front of her, yet she could see miles into the distace clearly, all i knoew through my ex I have to adore ladies who has a very plus RX. Love you all.

cut-in UK 10 Jan 2007, 16:27

4iiii, you say you don't wear glasses, and yet, you are clearly one of us.(OO's) Have you thought about GOC and would you have the opportunity to do it to, at least, a modest level ?

Hansel 10 Jan 2007, 14:45

I would tend to agree, Clare.

Minus, definitely and about -3.00/-4.00.

I don't find heavy lenses appealing, which perhaps is because I don't feel comfortable with my own prescription, and certainly not after an aunt, when I was in early teens, sudddenly commented in front of all the family assembled that I had really thick lenses in my glasses. No high index then!

That never to be forgotten love of my life was in my preferred range, but to my everlasting regret we never married and she subsequently left the area although that is not really relevant I suppose.

So how come I married someone with one eye plus, one eye minus?

Clare 10 Jan 2007, 13:40

I prefer minus prescriptions in the -3 range, which strangely is close to my own - I wonder if that has any significance!! Andy why do I like that Rx? Because it's strong enough to look *necessary* but not so strong that it distorts the eyes, and the image that's refracted through it looks like a crystal clear minification of what the 20/20-sighted person would see.

4iii 10 Jan 2007, 10:53

Hi Cut In, I do think a high plus rx is my preference, probably and rx of plus 8 to 10, I suppose I,m influenced by the experience wirh an ex of mine which I wrote about. I was one of those guys who would never have gone out with a lady with high plus or minus glasses, how my attitude changed when I saw beyond the glasses and saw a beautiful person behind the glasses, I,m more that convinced ladies with very high RXs are farmore genuine, are more loving and have warmth of peronality I have not seen in ladies who don,t wear glasses. Cut IN I don,t wear glasses myself, but I would date a lady with a high plus RX anyday, . I hope any ladies reading this will appreciate their are guys who look beyond their glasses and see the lady behind them. Love you all

DWV 10 Jan 2007, 08:16

Regarding "addiction":

I don't know if it really qualifies as an addiction, but I remember an expression from PSYCH100 called "adaptation level", which is a fancy way of saying that the thrill wears off because whatever it is becomes the normal state. So to get the same rush you have to push things further.

Which is why I'll be powerfully tempted to ask for a little stronger add at the next eye exam, and/or choose lenses like 8x35 or even executive trifocals.

cut-in UK 10 Jan 2007, 07:53

4iiii, it would be interesting to know, how we all think in terms of an ideal Rx. Strictly on the basis of visual appeal, if we were all to choose an ideal Rx for our partners, who would choose plus, and who minus? What level of dioptres and would you opt for thick or thin lenses? (High or low refractive index)

Personally,I favour about -7.00 in a mid-high index, lots of rings and quite visible cut-in. I can't persuade my wife,( an otherwise ideal woman !) to become even remotely interested in glasses except in the functional sense. Still, it's an interesting topic on which to invite opinion within the group. I bet we have a good cross-section here.

Any comments/observations ?

4iiii 10 Jan 2007, 07:21

Hi $eys, like you I get a real bzz from seeing a lady wearing strong plus glasses. I once dated a lady with strong plus glasses, she was a wonderful person, beautiful personality thats why I dated her. As tme went by I loved her in her thick lensed glasses, she was amased anone could find her attractive in such glasses, well I found her personality attractive and behind the glasses was eyes to die for, they were so beautiful they sparkled like diamonds, and looked so innocent and pure, I love her to wear her glasses when we were intimate loved to see those big eyes full of passion. I left where I used to live and we drifted apart but I still have many happy memories of the lady with the very high plus rx glasses and the wonderful person she was.

I can vouch many a lady wearing high RX glasses have beautiful personalities and gorgeous eyes behind the glasses. So I say to all high rx glasses wearers, you have something spexial that no glasses wearers have specs and personality appeal. Love you all.

newglasses 10 Jan 2007, 01:07

well, i sort of join your club. here's my history. for a long time i was fascinated with glasses but never had to wear any. at the beginning i was only into minus glasses until the day when i found out i was slightly farsighted. the thing for glasses kept on but it changed from one day to another to plus-glasses. then, almost exactly a year ago i went to an eye doctor who prescribed me glasses. although my prescription is not strong at all (only +1.00 dpt with some astigmatism) i always enjoy wearing them. above all i like weird effect only plus glasses can create when light falls through them. i also like the reflection in the mirror when behind you (watching the through the mirror throuth your own glasses) everything is upside down. now, don't misunderstand me; one part of me would like to wear stronger glasses (not significantly, but one to two dpt more), the strongest wish would actually be executive bifocals...., but my other side is (at the moment, still) rather happy that i don't really have to rely on my glasses in order to see. i can still manage without (although with some discomfort...). synopsis would be that i really wish i had to wear stronger glasses but not for everyday life. GOC is never the same therefore it helps to feed the craving ( i actually have plus glasses with +8 dpt, look pretty strong... but i only wear them from time to time privately) but in the long run is not satisfactory. but as i said, i sometimes feel like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hide.... so much to my little story.

All4Eyes 09 Jan 2007, 16:08

I'd like to bring up an interesting but somewhat controversial subject-Are glasses (esp. minus) addictive? I think one could make an argument that Yes, they are, both physicaly, because peoples' unaided sight tends to deteriorate (sometimes rapidly) upon their starting to wear glasses/wear stronger ones/wear them more often; and psychologicaly, becase people tend to experience a "buzz" or pleasant feeling when wearing minus lenses (esp. for the first time and/or when they are stronger than the person needs for clear sight). I actually read about something called "the refractive high", in a book about laser surgery, of all places (actually, it's a pretty entertaining read for us OOs, I believe it's called "No more glasses!" and it was written by a former myope who had been lasered, but she really did her homework in writing it, interviewing doctors and such, and so much of the book is about various physical and psychological aspects of myopia, that you can sorta skip over the exclusively surgery-oriented stuff and just stay in that intriguing "pre-op" stage forever). Anyway, I myself don't seem to be physicaly addicted to my glasses (indeed (alas), it seems almost as if my glasses have actually STOPPED the progression of my myopia) but you could definately make a case for my being psychologicaly addicted-I used to get a big rush from wearing my glasses,at first it was almost overwhelming, and even before I got them I've gotten a rush out of looking through other's minus lenses. For about 3 years I "got high" everyday with my specs, but then things started to change. Instead of feeling normal without glasses and "WoooooHooooo!" with them, I started feeling normal with my glasses and "bleeeck!" without them. Also I couldn't get a rush from anyone else's glasses anymore, since everyone I know has weaker ones than mine. If I took my glasses off, at first it was fun and challenging and even erotic to be in the blur, but after an hour or so I'd start feeling miserable and desperately want my glasses back (withdrawal?). Ahhh, and then what relief when I put them back on, that's the only way I could "get anything out of" them, to not wear them awhile then put them back on and even that was more simply relief than a "high". Now I'm even more miserable without my glasses and while I do still feel relieved when I put them back after not having them awhile, even when I'm wearing them I still feel a kind of craving for more minus. I even want a little more when I'm wearing two pairs together, although the craving's not as strong then. I think right now what would really make me happy would be to have about -10-12, that would be absoulutely yummy! But that's just me, how about ya'll? Anyone else need to go to "Lensoholics Anonomous"?

Phil 09 Jan 2007, 08:00

Clare, were things a bit sharper as you left the shop? I bet even you wore them as you left the optician's! I'd love to see them: they sound so nice. Lunch? I'll pay!

Clare 09 Jan 2007, 06:28

Phil - only by the tiniest, tiniest -0.25. I may occasionally emerge in them but not every day!

Phil 09 Jan 2007, 06:19

Clare, your new glasses sound ace. Is your rx up? Are we going to see you as a fulltime gwg now? I think I need -4 and a bit more add too. So it's a test for me soon as well.

Clare 09 Jan 2007, 06:03

I went to pick up my new glasses this morning. It's a little over a week since I ordered them and I wasn't sure I could remember quite what they looked like although I was pretty certain they were a good choice at the time. I knew they were kind of cat's eye in shape and two-tone - brown and bronze, so when the girl brought them out I hoped the bronze wouldn't be too bright, or worse - orange.

Anyway, all fears confounded, I'm really pleased with them. Even the girl in the optician's said how nice they are. My only comment is that they haven't used thinner lenses, its quite obvious to me that the lenses stick out from behind the frames, perhaps not so obvious to other people though because the arms are wide (not so wide) and plastic - the frames are a matt metal which is a nice combination.

Tom - I get on pretty fine with contacts and rarely have any of those embarrassing moments. I think that, amongst people who haven't tried them, or don't like the idea of putting something in their eye, there is a concern about them that is rarely true in reality. Of course there are some people who can't get on with them, but I know lots of people who wouldn't be without them.

08 Jan 2007, 09:06

http://www.nytimes.com/library/politics/camp/061000wh-bush.html

Tom 07 Jan 2007, 23:44

Clare: I don't wear contacts, because of two reasons. One is that simply I don't feel the need for them, glasses are ok for almost every occasions, while I can still manage the others (e.g. having a bath) without correction. The other reason to refuse contact lenses is that they appear something too much "empiric". While after having had a prescription by the eye doctor, you only need to have it implemented on a frame, for what glasses are concerned. On the other hand, I know that for contacts there are also several trials (soft or not, stronger or weaker, toric or spheric, ...) that I know you usually have to experience before getting the right ones for you. It seems strange to me that in 21st century correct a visual defect is a matter of "try to find the best"! Moreover, I heard from several people that since long use of lenses slightly change the curvature of your cornea (although this is reversible, that is why one should not wear contacts for several hours or days before an eye exam), it is unlikely that you can see well with glasses as soon as you have removed your contacts... Moreover, it appears to me that CL can give you a crisp vision for most of time, but that also can be of large disconfort in several occasions. Sentences like "I don't see anything more with my CL on after 8 hours", "I got some dust grain behind a lens and I have to remove it" or "I cannot sleep since I have my contacts in" etc. are quite common and they make me skeptical about the use of CL. Not to speak of "Nobody move! I've lost a lens!". Which is your experience?

Clare 02 Jan 2007, 13:50

George1968 - I'm really hoping they were a good choice. Unfortunately because of the New Year holiday I have to wait until early next week to see if that's true!

Tom - I'm not really sure why the sense of mystery is so powerful. I remember when colleagues found out that I was a contacts wearer they were amazed. I was surprised they were even interested but they behaved as though they'd been cheated, that I'd been holding back vital information from them. Isn't it funny though that amongst CL wearing friends there's often some discussion. I often wonder how people who don't wear them relate to that sort of conversation because they have no idea what it's like, especially as some people think it must be very painful to wear them. Do you ever wear contacts?

George1968 02 Jan 2007, 06:08

Clare,

Those frames sound like they would go very well with your blonde hair, so you should be pretty comfortable wearing them.

George

Tom 02 Jan 2007, 03:39

Clare: As a nearsighted admirer, I fully agree with you: discover that one wears CL add a large interest in him/her! And I think also "common" people are often curious about CLs.

Sophie: I presume you are full time glasses wearer. Or you like (as Phil and others, including myself) to go around without glasses some (or most) times? Did you resist wearing glasses at first? Which was your prescription when you started wearing them? Which was the activity you most needed them for and cannot performed without?

Katy: given your prescription (-1.5 if I remember well from another post) you should be able to function pretty well without glasses. So you don't need to work absolutely around your resistance, don't you?

Clare 01 Jan 2007, 10:30

Hansel - I think there are probably more people than we realise do the same - CLs for wearing out, glasses for home. I have a friend, we've known each other now for over 4 years, and it was only a year ago that I saw her with glasses. She, like me, probably works with people who haven't the faintest idea that she wears contacts, and I'm sure they'd love to know - in my experience people are always fascinated to find out that someone is a CL wearer.

Nice to know that it's not only girls that are vain though!!

Hansel 01 Jan 2007, 01:32

Happy New Year, Clare

Current Rx

L: -8.00, -1.75, 167.5 Add +1.00

R: -7.75, -1.25, 170.0 Add +1.00

However for most of the time out of the house I wear CLs and I have +1.50 readers to use with these, but being the reluctant that I am, I am considering trying a bifocal CL next time.

Try again with name appended!

01 Jan 2007, 01:31

Happy New Year, Clare

Current Rx

L: -8.00, -1.75, 167.5 Add +1.00

R: -7.75, -1.25, 170.0 Add +1.00

However for most of the time out of the house I wear CLs and I have +1.50 readers to use with these, but being the reluctant that I am, I am considering trying a bifocal CL next time.

Clare 01 Jan 2007, 00:54

Hi George1968 & Hansel - yes these are new, not the bold ones I bought at the beginning of last year. I still have them but they are so bold I never had the courage to wear them.

I had a regular check up back in May when there was a minor change to my prescription but at the time I didn't change my glasses.

Now I think I've chosen something that will better suit my colouring. From memory - I don't have them yet - they are a metal slightly cat's eye frame, brown at the top and more bronze at the bottom.

Hansel - I can't recall your rx.

Happy New Year to you both

Hansel 31 Dec 2006, 13:53

Apologies, Clare, for not addressing the question to you directly.

Best wishes

Hansel

Hansel 31 Dec 2006, 13:40

Are these different from the "bold" ones you bought a while ago?

If so have you had another test already?

George1968 31 Dec 2006, 12:12

Clare,

What kind of frames did you get?

Clare 31 Dec 2006, 06:42

cut-in uk - I agree with you for the most part that Eyescene can be a great forum for anyone self conscious about their glasses. In the past I have been ridiculously vain about wearing glasses and now I wear contacts 99% of the time. I do recognise now that my attitude was silly and what's helped me is that I have so many friends now who, periodically, do wear glasses. I think that you're right too that you have to feel you look good, I never did but I have just bought a pair that I think will actually look good. I'm optimistic that that will encourage me to wear them when I don't wear my contacts on one day a week, rather than just put up with it.

Whatever, it's great that Eyescene exists - without it I would never have understood how complex this combination of psychology and glasses really is.

Happy 2007 all!

cut-in uk 23 Dec 2006, 01:27

I think that the confidence that eyescene gives the wearer who 'doesn't like themselves in glasses' gradually converts their view. If they view glasses as a desirable fashion accessory to an equal extent as they consider them a medical necessity, the problem is half-way solved.

The only other decision is to choose a frame that really suits their face.( Always take an objective friend with you !)

If people didn't consider the 'look' desirable there would be no 20/20 GOC fanatics. Am I right ?

Sophie 22 Dec 2006, 18:29

Julian,

that would be a nice idea. Phil, you don't live in Germany by any chance ? ;-)

I thought about it and I think another reason why I don't like myself in glasses is that they make me so vulnerable... like someone could just knock them off my face and then I would be rather helpless. Okay, my prescription is not that strong, but I can't manage without them. Phil- I'm amazed you get by without wearing your glasses all the time! Is it difficult?

Puffin 22 Dec 2006, 17:57

Oh, I cannot bear to talk about glasses, vision, etc. Every time a specsavers ad comes on TV I hope it's finished quickly. This is because of what they mean to me. And I don't even wear glasses.

Katy 22 Dec 2006, 15:26

Sophie & Phil, I used to feel exactly the same way (I have probably said this to Phil before) and for years I avoided wearing my glasses, even in places like the cinema - I felt incredibly self-conscious. At the same time I have always been hugely attracted to men with glasses. For me I think it is the fact that glasses have such significance - they are such a 'big thing' that I couldn't bring myself to start wearing them. I think part of why I liked other people wearing them was admiration for being so brave! I have a friend with -6 glasses in plastic frames that she alternates with contacts depending on her mood and I have always been envious of her confidence to do that. Even though I wear mine all the time now, and have a collection of different coloured bold plastic frames, I still get embarrased if anyone asks me about them. However much I get used to them I'll still be an OO :-)

Phil 22 Dec 2006, 05:28

Thanks Julian! Chance would be a fine thing! Still, we can all dream at Christmas.

Julian 22 Dec 2006, 03:03

Phil, Sophie: I reckon you two ought to get together and each encourage the other to wear your glasses. That way you'd each have good vision and you'd each enjoy looking at the other ::)

Phil 22 Dec 2006, 02:04

Sophie, I feel exactly the same. I'm -3.75 in each eye but hardly wear my glasses (except for driving etc). And yet I would be immensely attracted to a gwg with that sort of rx. People here have tried to explain it but no-one has given me a convincing account of why I am as I am. I think part of it may be that, with glasses on, I can see myself more clearly, as reflected in mirrors, shop windows etc., and my inevitable imperfections are so much more obvious to me than when I go about in a blur.

Sophie 21 Dec 2006, 19:57

Tod,

yes I wear glasses. My prescription in my left eye is -4.50 with an extra -0.50 for astigmatism. In my right eye it's -3.00. I don't really like the way I look in glasses, but my eyes don't tolerate contacts...

it's incredibly weird, I feel unattractive in glasses, yet at the same time, I consider men in glasses to be incredibly sexy. (My preferred range is -3.00 to -8.00)

lazysiow 17 Dec 2006, 17:44

I should also say that my glasses are also in my pocket right now. I took them off for awhile as my nose was getting a bit sore

lazysiow 17 Dec 2006, 17:24

I'm a boy but you two just made me all girly girl :)

VFL 17 Dec 2006, 16:44

Oh, yes, I'm a girl. All girl. And good looking and sweet acting guys who need glasses make me feel extra-girlie.

All my dolls used to wear glasses. The boy ones, that is. It wouldn't have been right to have made them do without. Can't you just imagine them squinting to see what was going on in my bedroom?

I just grew up and switched to real men. They're much cuddlier.

All4Eyes 17 Dec 2006, 14:58

Awwwwwww, Thanks VFL! You're so sweet! Yes, no-name poster, I'm a girl and I think VFL is too.

08 Dec 2006, 13:15

VFL

Are u girl or boy? methinks all4eyes is a girl

VFL 08 Dec 2006, 09:51

Oh, All Four Eyes,

Here is a huge platter of still warm from the oven cookies I baked just for you. Aren't they cute? Gingerbread men specially decorated with tiny eyeglasses... The ones who aren't wearing glasses have their glasses in their pockets and are going to put them on after they take their contacts out. That's your special treat.

I hope that helps, dear one.

07 Dec 2006, 22:27

anyone have any idea what ugly betty's rx is supposed to be?

07 Dec 2006, 18:30

I would hope the writers of 'Ugly Betty' would get creative. If she should lose her glasses and tries to function without them. Or she takes them off on a date and walks into the men's room instead of the lady's.

DWV 07 Dec 2006, 00:51

So, is the UK getting its own version of Ugly Betty, or will it be the American show? The American show is good, and can be enjoyed worldwide by downloading using torrents (search at torrentspy.com), using a client like uTorrent.

All4eyes: How about becoming an optician? The training (if any) is a heck of a lot easier than to become a doctor. You have the thrill of putting glasses on people, seeing the finished result, not just scribbling prescriptions that may get filled elsewhere. There'd be other perqs like getting your own glasses made at wholesale rates.

All4Eyes (last was me too) 06 Dec 2006, 18:28

Anyway, possibly the worst thing about all this is that nobody in my real life understands what this means to me. Cant you find some other job to do? Of course I can, but thats just it, it would be SOME OTHER JOB. Its like, when someone dumps you (BTW, my social-life is also going nowhere at the moment, but dont get me started, Im almost out of Kleenex) and everyone says Youll find someone else. There are plenty of other fish in the sea. But you dont want OTHER FISH, you want THAT FISH, the one that just swam off with your best friend, who you always knew was prettier than you, but you accepted it (sort of), never dreaming shed stoop to such a Well, anyway, suffice it to say Ive been Seriously Bummed Out and feeling awful that I have nobody to talk to about it whod understand. But then I remembered you guys (arent you glad?). But, in all seriousness, it does mean a lot to me to have a place where I can come and chat with people who share my feelings about all the ups and downs and sideways that go along with being an OO. What would we do without the Internet? Of course, our bathrooms would be cleaner since wed have more spare time to kneel down and apply Pine-sol, but other than that itd really suck. Thanks for listening, you can remove your ponchos now, Im feeling much better. After all, Im still a Venus-like beauty with thousands of ardent devotees lying prostrate at my feet, trembling with ecstatic adoration

06 Dec 2006, 18:26

WARNING: Yall better get out your shiny little rain slickers, as Im about to do some serious blubbering. Ive always had this dream, maybe some of you know (if not, dont worry, Im about to whine about it at length) to become an eye doctor someday (why dont more of Us do it? Isnt it the perfect job for an OO?). But Ive finally realized that this is just not ever going to be physically possible for me, because of the nature of my disability (I have cerebral palsy, which affects all four limbs). Id always figured it might not be possible, maybe deep down I always knew, but now I am sure it wouldnt work. Still, it was a crushing realization. Heres how bad it was- I actually cried for I dont know how long, long enough that I made my vision foggy AND I DIDNT EVEN ENJOY THE FOGGY VISION! After Id calmed down a bit (BTW, one of the slightly annoying things about glasses is if you start crying while wearing them, you get them all messed up. But, of course, that usually seems pretty minor compared to whatever you were crying about) it occurred to me that if I had to choose between being a 20/20 optometrist and being a myope myself but having to have a different job, Id choose to be myopic myself. There really is nothing like it (GOC is NOT the same thing) and I truly do feel deeply sorry for all the poor emmetropes who can only imagine it. But at first I was Extremely Not a Happy Camper and my wimpy, feeble little -4s (I always think theyre kinda wimpy, even when Im in a good mood-Hi-mys rule!) seemed a poor consolation, like where the game show contestant didnt win the $50,000 Grand Prize, but did receive a lovely parting gift (coffee pot). I tried everything I could think of to cheer myself up: I watched King of the Hill, took generous doses of Ray Stevens and Dave Barry, went to my happy place, tried to eat myself into a sugar-stupor (where is VFL with her cookie wagon when you need her?!), thought about: sunsets, the beach, Christmas, babies, puppies, babies playing with puppies in front of the Christmas tree at a beach house at sunset. Even the prospect of new specs (see my post to Induced Myopia) failed to cheer me, although Dr. Reid (who Id just about bet my pinky fingers is a real-live, honest-to-goodness, got-teased-as-a-four-eyed-kid myope, casting director be praised , real name is Mark Gary Gumball or something like that) on the hit crime drama Criminal Minds (CBS Wednesdays, 9/8 central) helped a little.

All4Eyes 06 Dec 2006, 18:25

Is this better? What I MEANT to say was...

Fred 06 Dec 2006, 14:38

I'm not sure if this is the right thread to post it... Did anyone read this book already?

http://www.simonsays.com/content/book.cfm?tab=1&pid;=522361

06 Dec 2006, 13:53

Great, coming soon - Ugly Betty - another show to undermine eyewear??

Let's wait and see, coming soon to Channel 4 ...

http://www.tv.com/ugly-betty/show/58486/summary.html?full_summary=1&om;_act=convert&om;_clk=summarysh&tag;=showspace_links;full_summary

Katy 29 Nov 2006, 11:11

All4Eyes - yes, repost it! :-)

29 Nov 2006, 10:10

its like the song goes: If to go carry a picture of chairman Mao nobody will talk to you. something along those lines

All4Eyes 28 Nov 2006, 17:56

OMG! That'll teach me to cut n paste n run without looking back! I typed that in Notepad (it was double-spaced there!). I'm so sorry! Shall I repost (with spaces) or have I worn ya'll out?

Orkins 27 Nov 2006, 12:12

No name poster,

Are you sure it isn't your glasses, or aneed for them? Some vision defects or glasses cause letters to appear spread apart.

27 Nov 2006, 10:28

all4eyes,

It is a real shame if you are trying to make a point or communicate with us, your typing cannot be deciphered without causing a major headache.

26 Nov 2006, 17:26

You really like to use that space key, don't you All4eyes?

It makes it very difficult to read. Just in case you are not aware.

26 Nov 2006, 17:25

You really like to use that space key, don't you All4eyes?

It makes it very difficult yo read. Just in case you are not aware.

Puffin 26 Nov 2006, 17:20

eh?

All4eyes 26 Nov 2006, 14:50

B u t a t f i r s t I w a s E x t r e m e l y N o t a H a p p y C a m p e r a n d m y w i m p y , f e e b l e l i t t l e - 4 ' s ( I a l w a y s t h i n k t h e y ' r e k i n d a w i m p y , e v e n w h e n I ' m i n a g o o d m o o d - H i - m y ' s r u l e ! ) s e e m e d a p o o r c o n s o l a t i o n , l i k e w h e r e t h e g a m e s h o w c o n t e s t a n t d i d n ' t w i n t h e $ 5 0 , 0 0 0 G r a n d P r i z e , b u t d i d r e c e i v e a l o v e l y " p a r t i n g g i f t " ( c o f f e e p o t ) . I t r i e d e v e r y t h i n g I c o u l d t h i n k o f t o c h e e r m y s e l f u p : I w a t c h e d " K i n g o f t h e H i l l " , t o o k g e n e r o u s d o s e s o f R a y S t e v e n s a n d D a v e B a r r y , w e n t t o m y " h a p p y p l a c e " , t r i e d t o e a t m y s e l f i n t o a s u g a r - s t u p o r ( w h e r e i s V F L w i t h h e r c o o k i e w a g o n w h e n y o u n e e d h e r ? ! ) , t h o u g h t a b o u t : s u n s e t s , t h e b e a c h , C h r i s t m a s , b a b i e s , p u p p i e s , b a b i e s p l a y i n g w i t h p u p p i e s i n f r o n t o f t h e C h r i s t m a s t r e e a t a b e a c h h o u s e a t s u n s e t . E v e n t h e p r o s p e c t o f n e w s p e c s ( s e e m y p o s t t o I n d u c e d M y o p i a ) f a i l e d t o c h e e r m e , a l t h o u g h D r . R e i d ( w h o I ' d j u s t a b o u t b e t m y p i n k y f i n g e r s i s a r e a l - l i v e , h o n e s t - t o - g o o d n e s s , g o t - t e a s e d - a s - a - f o u r - e y e d - k i d m y o p e , c a s t i n g d i r e c t o r b e p r a i s e d , r e a l n a m e i s M a r k G a r y G u m b a l l o r s o m e t h i n g l i k e t h a t ) o n t h e h i t c r i m e d r a m a " C r i m i n a l M i n d s " ( C B S W e d n e s d a y s , 9 / 8 c e n t r a l ) h e l p e d a l i t t l e .

All4Eyes 26 Nov 2006, 14:49

I c o u l d n ' t r e a l l y t h i n k w h e r e t o p u t t h i s , s i n c e y o u d o n ' t h a v e a W h i n e C e l l a r h e r e ( h e y , W u r m , c o u l d w e s t a r t o n e m a y b e ? A t h r e a d a b o u t t h e d o w n s i d e o f w e a r i n g g l a s s e s / v i s i o n p r o b l e m s / b e i n g a n O O ? I ' m s u r e e v e r y b o d y ' s l o s t / b r o k e n g l a s s e s s t o r i e s c o u l d f i l l i t u p ) , s o I t h o u g h t t h i s s e e m e d l i k e t h e c l o s e s t f i t . W A R N I N G : Y a ' l l b e t t e r g e t o u t y o u r s h i n y l i t t l e r a i n s l i c k e r s , a s I ' m a b o u t t o d o s o m e s e r i o u s b l u b b e r i n g . I ' v e a l w a y s h a d t h i s d r e a m , m a y b e s o m e o f y o u k n o w ( i f n o t , d o n ' t w o r r y , I ' m a b o u t t o w h i n e a b o u t i t a t l e n g t h ) t o b e c o m e a n e y e d o c t o r s o m e d a y ( w h y d o n ' t m o r e o f U s d o i t ? I s n ' t i t t h e p e r f e c t j o b f o r a n O O ? ) . B u t I ' v e f i n a l l y r e a l i z e d t h a t t h i s i s j u s t n o t e v e r g o i n g t o b e p h y s i c a l l y p o s s i b l e f o r m e , b e c a u s e o f t h e n a t u r e o f m y d i s a b i l i t y ( I h a v e c e r e b r a l p a l s y , w h i c h a f f e c t s a l l f o u r l i m b s ) . I ' d a l w a y s f i g u r e d i t m i g h t n o t b e p o s s i b l e , m a y b e d e e p d o w n I a l w a y s k n e w , b u t n o w I a m s u r e i t w o u l d n ' t w o r k . S t i l l , i t w a s a c r u s h i n g r e a l i z a t i o n . H e r e ' s h o w b a d i t w a s - I a c t u a l l y c r i e d f o r I d o n ' t k n o w h o w l o n g , l o n g e n o u g h t h a t I m a d e m y v i s i o n f o g g y A N D I D I D N ' T E V E N E N J O Y T H E F O G G Y V I S I O N ! A f t e r I ' d c a l m e d d o w n a b i t ( B T W , o n e o f t h e s l i g h t l y a n n o y i n g t h i n g s a b o u t g l a s s e s i s i f y o u s t a r t c r y i n g w h i l e w e a r i n g t h e m , y o u g e t t h e m a l l m e s s e d u p . B u t , o f c o u r s e , t h a t u s u a l l y s e e m s p r e t t y m i n o r c o m p a r e d t o w h a t e v e r y o u w e r e c r y i n g a b o u t ) i t o c c u r r e d t o m e t h a t i f I h a d t o c h o o s e b e t w e e n b e i n g a 2 0 / 2 0 o p t o m e t r i s t a n d b e i n g a m y o p e m y s e l f b u t h a v i n g t o h a v e a d i f f e r e n t j o b , I ' d c h o o s e t o b e m y o p i c m y s e l f . T h e r e r e a l l y i s n o t h i n g l i k e i t ( G O C i s N O T t h e s a m e t h i n g ) a n d I t r u l y d o f e e l d e e p l y s o r r y f o r a l l t h e p o o r e m m e t r o p e s w h o c a n o n l y i m a g i n e i t .

cut-in uk 24 Nov 2006, 14:38

Wannabe, have you ever thought of trying glasses over contacts, getting the prescription you were happy with? Then you might talk your wife into it, and you could do it together. There are some really neat frames available on the web, and really cheap for high quality, if you shop around.

This could open up whole new horizons for you both.

Tod 24 Nov 2006, 08:57

Sophie

do you wear glasses?

Wannabe 24 Nov 2006, 03:44

It's quite a story: I'm a gwg lover and I love high + or high - women with their thick glasses. I'd love to be myself a high + or -, but i'm only a mild hyperope at +1. My wife has come to know about my attraction to visually "impaired" women. She took it really bad saying that i'm a pervert, sexually obsessed... Then she did get along with it and started even wearing glasses (though rarely...) sometimes during sex. She kept teasing me for this preference of mine thinking it's wierd to enjoy something that others suffer from...

I now feel the need to look out for that fantasm of mine somewhere else, i mean on the net, forums, chats... Now she thinks this is betrayal...

Hollie 28 Oct 2006, 04:04

diva, do you not have glasses at all? I always wear mine as soon as I get up and before I go to sleep, couldn't really imagine not! Also if I'm say watching a film in bed, I usually fall asleep so would always wear glasses in that situation.

Clare- no, I never wore them fulltime before I got contacts. I only got them as I noticed how difficult it was becoming to see people in the street and knew I'd have to start wearing glasses more. I think my first pair of contacts were -1.75.

Clare 27 Oct 2006, 23:31

Hollie its crazy really isnt it? Did you never wear glasses fulltime before switching to contacts? Id assumed, wrongly, that most people had. I know a few people with lower prescriptions like mine who have just taken to contacts, one whos convinced that wearing contacts has made it difficult to go without. On the other hand I have a friend, long time contacts wearer, who is much more pragmatic she really wouldnt understand why we have an issue at all. Lucky eh?

Curt - strange isn't it when glasses are so fashionable nowadays? I see people with virtually no prescription who are happy to wear them.

diva 27 Oct 2006, 16:22

i always HATED glasses when i was younger (at school).

so i got contacts and basically never take them out.

they've been giving me problems of late (although they've been better over the last month) but i am still facing up to the fact that i need to give my eyes a break.

i am going to try and get glasses next time i have an eye exam (eeeek!) if i can make myself do it ... i am trying to think of the advantages, such as i would love to be able to wake up in the morning and see clearly without having to muddle round putting contacts in!

will be weird though.

Hollie 27 Oct 2006, 07:39

Clare,

I feel like that a lot of the time. When I had to wear glasses all the time for 6 months I absolutely hated it. I got contacts as soon as the optician told me to wear glasses all the time.

I know a few of my friends have had the same experience, and compared to people who wore glasses fulltime before they switched to contacts, they seem a lot more reluctant to wear their specs when they take their contacts out.

Curt 26 Oct 2006, 11:48

Clare: I don't think it is totally unique to contact lens wearers either. I know some folks who are probably -3 or greater that still have a phobia/stigma about wearing glasses and will only put them on when they absolutely HAVE to, say to drive or at the movies. Otherwise, they will struggle, squint or ask other folks with them what a sign or distant object says. I remember having feelings like this when I first got glasses in high school, but that was a long time ago...

Clare 26 Oct 2006, 11:32

James makes an interesting post on the guys in glasses thread I dare not post there so Im pasting here. It goes like this

because he mostly wore contacts, he was obviously one of those guys (like me) who just never wore glasses full time, and as a result, never fully got over the initial self consciousness hurdle and was, in a way, perpetually trapped in it. .

I think that is so true. Anyone else agree?

James are you getting any better about it? What's your Rx?

Troy 07 Sep 2006, 15:05

Nice site!

http://ydgcboui.com/hiwi/qnfw.html - http://edhfqfda.com/frkl/ssyi.html

glassesforeveryone 27 Jul 2006, 09:20

Here in the UK, you'll find that there are a heck of a lot of contacts wearers. However, you will se eout in clubs, fashionabls girls/boys embracing the added panache that a well designed pair of specs can add to their look.

I thin in Europe glasses are seen as more of a style object than here in the UK.

Sophie 27 Jul 2006, 08:42

I realized that here in Germany glasses may be not as much of a stigma as in other countries, like, for example, the US. First of all, the percentage of people who have LASIK is, as far as I know, much lower here than in the States. I've also read posts on a few threads here on Eyescene where people complained that whenever they went clubbing, nobody in the club wore glasses.

In my experience, wherever I go- no matter if it's a dingy, "working-class" metal club, a sophisticated goth club or a house and dance party that is frequented by college students- there are always lots of glasses wearers around, of both sexes (although I think that there are slightly more men...) Even some of the barkeepers and DJs wear glasses.

Of course this is great if you are an incurable OO like me. ;-)

Any thoughts or comments?

gl 08 Jul 2006, 18:09

All4eyes

My gf loves for me to push her heavy thick glasses on her nose. I find it sexy when they slip down her nose, and her lenses steam up when she hot and sweaty

All4Eyes 08 Jul 2006, 17:48

Id be interested in knowing how all of you feel about your glasses. Not about how you look in them, but about the glasses themselves. Like, are you protective of them? Grateful? Embarrassed? Ambivalent? Indifferent? Do you sort of have a feeling of connectedness to them, almost as if they were a part of your body? Im asking because Ive realized my attitude towards my glasses now has changed a great deal from the very first time I had glasses when I was 7-9 years old. Back then, I was pretty indifferent about them, I took no particular pains to remember where I put them and often had to hunt for them if I wanted them. I took them off for P.E. at school, swimming and such, and sometimes total strangers would offer to hold them for me and Id let them without a second thought! And the thought of someone breaking my glasses? Well then, good, my parents couldnt try to make me wear them anymore! But now, I would be very uneasy not knowing right where my glasses were and I would certainly not be comfortable with someone I didnt know holding them while I was off doing something else (now, if theyre just looking at them and trying them on while Im standing right there, thats a bit different, but still Id get edgy if it went on too long, I think). And I dont even want to THINK about someone breaking them! The very idea makes me shudder and flinch just as if I were imagining someone punching my nose and breaking it! And its not like Im blind without them or anything. I sometimes wonder if I am too attached and overprotective of my glasses and if this ties into being an OO in any way?

All4Eyes 08 Jul 2006, 17:47

Looking back, I realize that the father of one of my friends could very well have been an OO. Once when I was about 10 or so, I was watching TV with my friend and her family and suddenly her dad says to me Hey, do you need glasses or do you just think youre cute when you squint? A bit flustered, I reply I didnt know I was doing it (and, of course, realizing that I am doing it, stop immediately) and he says Yeah, you were squinting a bit. Then later, the first time he saw me with my glasses he said Well, looks like youre an official four-eyes! I did have a vague sense that he took an undue interest in my vision, but I didnt think that much of it. Now I kind of slap myself on the forehead and think Stupid! but somehow, it just never occurred to me that I might not be the only one. I didnt even dare to hope such a thing. But then I found Eyescene and everything changed This guy didnt wear glasses, though I believe he had and then he had RK surgery, in fact was one of the initial guinea pigs when it first came out, and this seems a strange thing for an OO to do (though I realize not all OOs enjoy wearing glasses themselves). His wife didnt wear glasses, either, but both of their daughters did.

lazysiow 18 Jun 2006, 16:47

Just why was Fantasy Optical eliminated anyway? It was always my highlight of coming here

Puffin 18 Jun 2006, 15:34

I wonder what happened to RL Hamilton. His stories were great, would love to see more.

specs4ever 18 Jun 2006, 15:00

But All4eyes, isn't that the nature of things. I am reaching a point in my life where I am ready to let younger people continue with writing stories. They just are not as easy to write anymore, because I have done the themes to death. We had a chap named Hikari who I thought was going to be a really good writer, but he has not returned after he posted one extremely good story. Possibly the elimination of Fantasty Optical dictated his demise. Another writer who was very good was R.L. Hamilton. And I am sure that if Bobby had not been so kind to open up his web site to us writers, my own demise would have come much sooner. Yes, I still have a lot of stories posted on my old web site, but I had to have another E.S. regular put the stories on it for me, as I am too computer illiterate to do so. I tried, honest I tried.

All4Eyes 18 Jun 2006, 07:05

Specs4Ever:Thanks for the praise. It really boosts a new writer's confidence to have ES's star storyteller give you the thumbs up. But I'd hate to think I was hastening your departure as a writer. Your stories rock! 8-)

13 Jun 2006, 22:39

Puffin where are all of yours stories at? I was looking for Bright Eyes the other night and couldn't find it. Very glad to hear you are continuing your diaries series.

Puffin 13 Jun 2006, 03:58

I'm currently writing "Dear Diary V".

specs4ever 13 Jun 2006, 03:29

I read your stories All4eyes, and I am pleased to see someone else coming along as a writer. In answer to India's question, I started writing stories mostly because I couldn't find any stories written about people(mostly ladies for me) who wore strong glasses. Now I find my stories are sometimes a little too much the same old same old. I probably will reach a point someday where I will just say enough of this, and this point will be reached faster if other authours come along to fill the gap.

lazysiow 12 Jun 2006, 14:35

oh Ive done it too. Actually depending on the time of lens you get, AR coating might help, some types fog up easier than others.

I've got a CR39 pair that fogs up really easily, and I think it has AR coating too, and I have a high index pair from zenni that barely fogs up at all and clears very quickly that are a joy to shower with :)

All4Eyes 12 Jun 2006, 13:36

Im not sure if anybody wants to hear this or not, but I found it interesting. The other day I took a bath with my glasses on. I realize this is not common practice until ones eyes get much worse than mine, but lately I have been wanting to do it, anyway, not sure if its because I feel extra-vulnerable being naked and bare-eyed or what. I always have kept them on until the last minute, while running the water and getting things ready. So I decided to give it a try and it was great! You really can avoid splashing them in a tub bath if youre careful (now, if youre taking a shower or washing your hair, thats another story, but) and if you wear them into the bathroom and lay them on the counter while you bathe, as I do, they get so steamed up from the hot water that you pretty much have to clean them, anyway. I did feel a little silly sitting in a tub full of suds with nothing on but my glasses but it was really quite delightful to be able to see clearly whilst bathing. That was a novel experience for me. I have found that in the bath my senses seem heightened and as I had thought this might be because I could not see much, being bare-eyed, I had expected that wearing my glasses in might diminish my awareness of the sensual aspects of bathing (the warmth and buoyancy of the water, the smell of the soap, the feel of my hands on my body as I wash) but I found this wasnt so. Im thinking I may wear my glasses in every time I take a tub bath from now on. It might seem strange, but I enjoyed it and would highly recommend bespectacled bathing to anyone who is more than a little nearsighted. On another note, Ive been reading the posts on this thread with much interest. India, you sound a lot like me, Id like to email you soon. I sent Bobby my true story as an optic-obsessive and he put it up on his site. If you read it I think youll find we have a lot in common (btw, Ive just started talking to my blind friend again). Specs4ever fan, I enjoy stories of people going without glasses and enjoy it myself at times as well (though I know you couldnt tell it from my above posting! Its just that its like a challenge or a bit of a nervous thrill, if that makes sense, and I kind of have to get psyched up to do it. Rather like blindsimming, I think, in a way). I have also started writing my own stories (Bobby has posted my first and I just sent him another) and am thinking of taking up the challenge of writing a story to suit Specs4ever fan (that is, if Specs doesnt mind the competition.). But, seriously, Im a fan of his, too. 8-)

30 Apr 2006, 17:22

btw 15:26

please tell me more!!

30 Apr 2006, 17:20

i have. it is how i finally got my glasses!!

30 Apr 2006, 15:26

Has anyone ever faked bad eyesight? I've exaggerated mine and am on the verge of being found out!

SZ6 25 Apr 2006, 11:28

This reminds me of a couple sightings. Freshman year in high school, there was a girl who normally wore -5ish glasses in my math class. One day she came to class without them. I remember she had to lean her face down to her desk to read and needed to walk right up to the board, within a foot of it, to see anything our teacher had written.

And one time in college, during finals one semester, I saw a girl using a public computer terminal in the library. She leaned in towards the screen, almost touching her face to it, then held the keyboard up to her face to see what she was typing. I'm not sure if she either a) was a regular contact lens wearer who had torn one/had an infection/etc and didn't have backup glasses, b) was a regular glasses wearer who had lost/broken them, or c) was a contacts wearer whose eyes were so tired from studying that she had to wear the glasses for a while, but was embarassed enough that she tried to go without them.

Wayne 25 Apr 2006, 11:08

Puffin - I remember the days just before contacts. I knew a guy in Jr. High School (1955-57) whose rx must have been around -5. He wouldn't put on his glasses until he actually sat down at his desk in class -- a necessity since otherwise he not only couldn't see the board, he would have had to lean down close just to see the papers on his desk. He worked in the student office and would lean close to use the adding machine or file cards.

Another guy in high school likewise would only wear glasses when seated at his desk. Looking for a classroom, he'd quint up at the numbers over the doors. If he hadn't been fairly tall he wouldn't have been able to manage. When we took one of these achievement tests, he sat down and then lifted the test paper up close to make sure it was his. He didn't want to put his glasses on until the test actually started -- I suppose a vain attempt to pretend he only needed them for reading.

The first person I knew of to get contacts was in my senior year, 1960. Hard contacts had just come out. He was an Asian guy who played football (defemse only) and wanted to be able to see what was going on on the field. Sitting on the bench he couldn't make out anything on the field.

Sally 25 Apr 2006, 10:31

India

What was your rx then and what is it now?

India 25 Apr 2006, 09:25

Anon - HA! The humiliation of not being able to see - I remember it well. I was almost 12 and finally had to give up - I just couldnt see the board even from the front row in the classroom or hide that I couldnt any more. I'm sure that every person who has ever put on glasses for the first time remembers the realization "oh the trees have seperate leaves, I have freckles on my face, I'm SUPPOSED to be able to read that writing, etc."

Puffin 24 Apr 2006, 17:35

Yes, that's a interesting topic, especially thinking of the times when there were no CL's, just glasses or blur. What a time that must have been!

Cactus Jack 24 Apr 2006, 16:16

Anon,

Your use of the word "humiliation" for not having perfect vision is interesting.

Anon 24 Apr 2006, 14:10

What really intrigues me is thinking about how people deal with the necessity to become a full time wearer. I guess some people are quite pleased but are others just driven to it to avoid the humiliation of not being able to see? Or because they like the corrected vision that they get from glasses? Or maybe even that that the headaches are just too much?

Please please, tell me your stories

Specs4ever fan 16 Apr 2006, 23:04

Hi S4E

I appreciate your position re lost / missing glasses entirely.

I'll keep my fingers crossed that you can concoct a story which you do not think is denegrading. Maybe the story is about a woman who gets turned-on, or at least enjoys turning her partner on by going out without her glasses.

I seem to recall a poster (by the name of Sarah, I think) from many years ago who was about -22, but had agreed to go to a party with her boyfriend without glasses to please him.

However, all this is not particularly important, as I enjoy everything you write.

Specs4ever fan

A big fan of yours

Mister Mild 15 Apr 2006, 09:01

My fascination with GWGs, goes a long way towards keeping me sane when I am away from home as at present, travelling alone and in places where GWGs are few and far between. I can close out reality for hours by conjouring up some of the GWGs I have known or even just passed in the street years ago - beats counting sheep. And when I least expect it, a real one shows up, like the lady at this hotel who just opened up the computer room for me!

India 15 Apr 2006, 06:03

Spexfan and Tortoise - thanks for your posts - Spex - I am in New England - why don''t you email me to discuss your situation if you like? What do you mean by becoming a "dilletant optometrist?" GOC? And Tortoise - thanks for the message and link - I'd love to email if you feel so inclined - thanks so much, guys! email is indianeweng@yahoo.com

To everyone who's emailed me - I really appreciate it!

India 15 Apr 2006, 05:56

Hi Specs4ever - wow this is the first time I'd made my way over to that part of the site - quite a body of work! I read Musings and will read Why Bother when I'm less pressed for time - but I'd love to hear how you came to begin writing about this topic - does the writing go along with your obsession i.e. have you always written)or did it come about as a result of your realisation of it?

India 15 Apr 2006, 05:52

Ambly - thanks for your post - I know my neice who wears glasses(she is 7) had a very childfriendly exam and wears adorable little red glassses - totally different from your nightmare!

specs4ever 14 Apr 2006, 20:12

Hi fan, thanks for the comment. It is much appreciated.

As for the request for a story about lost or missing glasses, this is something I don't like to do. It seems cruel to me to deprive a high myope of glasses. There are a couple of my stories about this. The Kidnapping was from an idea by Andy, and another one by Andy was about a lady in a plane crash - name of story escapes me at the moment. But for the most part, I do not like to place anyone in this situation. However, if I can come up with something that I don't feel denegrading to a lady, I will do another one.

I have also had a few requests for a story about a high plus person. I don't know as much about high plus wearers as I do high minus, so I tend to shy away. However, I do have an idea going on one.

Specs4ever fan 13 Apr 2006, 23:42

Hey S4E. I am a very long time lurker and have never, before now, felt inclined to post to you, but I just wanted to let you know how much I have enjoyed all your stories over the years. I know rapid precription progressions are your speciality, but I would really enjoy stories about helplessness through lost glasses.

A big fan of yours

specs4ever 13 Apr 2006, 13:45

Hi India. I have been reading your posts, and in answer to your question about how and why, my best answers are found in 2 stories on Bobby's site - accessable from the links section here. These true stories in my writing section are called "Musings", and "Why Bother?" Both are true strories, although everything else I write is ficitonal. They can be found in the old stories section.

Michel 13 Apr 2006, 02:23

I dont understand why I cant go on lenschat anymore ?? I talked with girls and women with glasses about the link between sex and glasses. Some girls said to me to use private way to have these sort of exchange and I did it. Some girls talked about sex with me and seem enjoyed of that. Why im banished now ??!

Michel

tortoise 12 Apr 2006, 18:57

India, Yes, I'd like to chat. You could ask questions here if you like or we could go to email.

Meanwhile, re: your interest in blindness, have a look at the stories by Amy Casseax.

This link

http://sweb.cz/bobbygoc/amy/amyframe.htm

should take you there. Cheers

spexfan 12 Apr 2006, 16:39

Hi India, what part of the US are you in? I'm in NYC if you ever wanted to meet up and discuss this sort of thing.

My experiences are similar to some of those posted.....can remember having crushes on bespectacled girls as early as age 6. I remember making some glasses out of bent wire for me and select visitors to wear around the fort I'd built in the vacant lot next to my house. And I had a girlfriend when I was 11 who became myopic and was forced to get some glasses....which totally blew my mind.

It's been ongoing and I've become a dilettante optometrist like a lot of the people who post here. This website was a total revelation when it started almost ten years ago.

I can pretty much tell when someone is wearing contacts, quite often when I meet a cute girl I'll check out her pupils to see if there's any chance she might be myopic. They probably think I'm gazing longingly into their eyes, which......I am!

Anyway, for me, I'm 36 and am mildly hyperopic but have never managed (nor needed) to wear my glasses outside the house.

India 12 Apr 2006, 16:02

Tortoise - i have to say that i'm really intruiged by your little encounter with the checkout lady when you were wearing -36 glasses. This must be a throwback to what I mentioned previously with my pre-adolescent fascination with blindness. I'd love to chat with you further about it if you feel like talking -

india 12 Apr 2006, 15:56

straggler - i meant to say previously that hardly any of a person's day to day ACQUAINTANCES ever notice the CHANGE from CL's to glasses - my friends NEVER notice or if they do it's like one of my friends i've known for about 2 years will say - "i didnt know you wore glasses" and this is even me who switches back and forth within a DAY(ok my eyes are sensitive). people just arent that tuned in. although after this site i happen to know that LOTS of you DO notice hahaha

India 12 Apr 2006, 15:46

Hi Straggler - I would say that (after my admittedly wussy little experiment!) wearing glasses and not wearing CLs is rather empowering, sort of devil-may-care. There's so much focus by the media on perfect appearance(I live in USA - i have this feeling its different a bit in other countries). But it IS changing and I think there is more appreciation these days of individuality. But it IS fun to have it both ways. And Straggler - hardly ANYONE ever notices CL's or glasses one way or the other!

Straggler 12 Apr 2006, 11:20

I realise I'm at a slight tangent all the time but it still relates to glasses. What fascinates me is how people can totally change the way they look and how they're seen by people just by switching between glasses and contacts. Here are a couple of examples - I have a friend who's late 30s so starting to look a bit mature but wow what a difference when she wears her glasses she looks so much younger. Another friend of mine reckoned that glasses are good for hiding the effects of a heavy night out.

I wonder how much people who can wear both contacts and glasses actually consider the difference. Do you India? How do you feel now you've been wearing glasses not contact lenses - do you actually feel different? What do you say to people who ask why?

tortoise 12 Apr 2006, 07:06

India, although I became nearsighted at age 8, progression stabilized early and my Rx all my life has been around -3.

In GOC, As in most things, individual tastes vary. Some people like to wear obtrusively thick glasses and enjoy the reaction they get from others but that's not my preference.

When I go out and about in GOC it is usually with -24 glasses. The lenses are very well made and I have often talked with people face to face who didn't seem at all aware of anything unusual. Inwardly, though, I am aware of the minification and distortion caused by the strong lenses. For some reason I enjoy trying to function as normally and confidently as possible just as I would if this were my genuine vision.

Once, while wearing -36 glasses, I was at the checkout in a store and the cashier noticed my glasses immediately. When I fumbled a bit trying to pick out the right change she got me to hold out my hand and she selected the coins. She was just brusquely helpful and I didn't feel embarrassed.

BTW, an important part of the 4th stage that I described earlier was getting online, finding this website and others, realising that many people share this quirk in various forms.

ambly 12 Apr 2006, 04:47

Hi India I am a long time lurker on this site also an old timer,I remeber being taken to the eye clinic when I was around 6 for suspect lazy eye.The girl at the reception made a big impresion on me,she wore plastic dark coloured oval glasses with silver metal sides and thick plano fronted minus lenses. For some some reason I think this started my thing about girls in glasses.At this visit to clinic I was diliated,under protest,had to be held down with the help of the girl with the thick glasses.I was told after the eye exam that I would have to wear glasses

all the time and if I didnt I would be patched,this was made as a threat,bit scarey for a 6 year old.After this it was back every three months for a couple of years with new stronger glasses every six.Never did get patched though the glasses were pretty ugly,very thick left lens and mild plus right set in a nice pair of NHS frames.Im sure all this had a profound effect on me,I hope kids are treated better these days.

India 11 Apr 2006, 22:07

Hey tortoise, hope you don't mind my posing an obviously old question here - I HAVE read some of the old posts but really wanted to hear the current perspective so I thank you for piping up. I don't think I've ever thought about actually experiencing someone else's eyesight - in terms of the GOC you do. What is your actual eyesight? Or I'd never thought about it until I found this board - but what is the REACTION you get from just the odd person on the street? Is that what is gives you that rush? Or is it all internal. I hope I'm not throwing out too many probing questions. I just really cant imagine what it's like to be much more nearsighted than I am - although I know that there are many who are....-36 blows my mind.

On another note, I was always interested as a kid in blind people - I was obsessed for a while with Helen Keller and Mary from Little House on the Prairie and even did dramatic play pretending to be blind - which I think is sort of common among young girls. At one point I even wrote an embarrassingly bad love story about a blind girl - I'd loved the book "Follow My Leader" or something like that!

India 11 Apr 2006, 21:51

Hi Straggler - yeah after reading the posts on this board I DO think that there is a psychology to contacts vs glasses. For 2 days now I have done nothing but wear glasses - just to remind myself how I might feel as a glasses only wearer. It's more how I feel about myself in them than how others percieve me - since most everyone I know is used to seeing me in both. But I DID go to a party tonight wearing my glasses - which got some double takes(for social occasions I and almost any other glasses wearers I know always change to contacts). I don't think I got any negative reactions, quite the reverse - a friends husband paid me LOTS of attention although he's a smarmy type. I think reading this board has made me highly sensitive to my own emotions, which I'm not sure I really needed, LOL. Or maybe I did!

tortoise 11 Apr 2006, 19:20

Hi India, your question is very well put and, although this has been discussed here before, I'd like to answer in the hope that others may post about their own experiences.

I've been OO since childhood. My mother wore glasses and I remember being fascinated by them and amazed at how the lenses strained my eyes when I tried them on.

When, at age eight, I became nearsighted I was extremely conflicted about getting glasses. I didn't want to be seen as "different" but wearing glasses gave me an incredible rush!

I found I was attracted to the girls who wore glasses and had major crushes on some of them throughout the school years.

Stage 1 of optical obsession persists to this day: fascination with glasses and with the vision of those who need them. I started with trying to understand the difference between plus and minus lenses. I studied everything I could find about vision problems and glasses. The first thing I notice about anyone (after gender perhaps) is whether or not they wear glasses.

Second stage: married a young woman with good vision and eventually confessed my quirk to her. Got her to wear strong glasses from the thrift store at times and later, to wear weak bifocals regularly, which she enjoyed.

Stage 3: After divorce unrelated to the above, found a highly myopic girlfriend (-18,-22)and had a wonderful relationship with her for several years.

Now I'm in stage 4: able, with plus contact lenses (GOC), to experience high myopia myself up to -36. Finding it very interesting and satisfying.

I hope this helps.

Puffin 11 Apr 2006, 13:57

Yes, I like shiny glasses, particularly metal frames with nice thick lenses.

straggler 11 Apr 2006, 11:43

Ive always thought I was a bit odd so finding this forum has helped a bit. This is more about the psychology of contact lenses, can i introduce that to this glasses obsession discussion? I have an obsession with the secrecy of wearing contacts and the inspiring odd occasion when some people reveal that they wear glasses.

Have you ever spent any time wondering why someone chooses to wear contacts and how different they feel when theyre not wearing them

How do you feel when you know someone is wearing contacts and how do you feel when you occasionally see them wearing glasses

Do you ever wonder when they wear glasses and for what reasons

Do you ever feel jealous because they have the choice

ehpc 11 Apr 2006, 11:32

Freud of course is highly discredited these days..................Pete

M13 11 Apr 2006, 11:20

India...

My first recollection is when I was 7 or 8, when a girl in my class first "had to wear glasses" as I thought at the time. From that age I was intrigued and would look at people in glasses and try to work out why they were all different. I also knew that I really liked girls that wore glasses, especially "the shiny ones".

Through puberty and beyond, girls or women in glasses were (and

still are) a major turn-on and I discovered that it was the short-sighted girls that I particularly liked, although any gwg, to a degree, was better than those without.

Over the years, I've tried to analyse my fetish and like many others here, found eyescene and was very happy to find that I wasn't alone. Not only that, but since I've been lurking (about 8 years now) and occasionally posting, I have learnt a great deal about "my condition" and eye health too - thanks to Wurm and many others.

The only thing I can put it down to, is that I know when I was very young, (from birth to about three) a neighbour used to look after me regularly, as my mother wasn't too well at the time. As I recall, she was quite myopic (and I would guess about -10 to -15 (my favourite Rx), dark-haired and of a "dumpy" build. I've fancied this type of woman all my life, but the glasses are the major attraction by far.- I can only think it was that stage of my life that formed my preferences. I'm no expert, but I think Freud said something about people tending to fancy those that were kind to them in their early years.

By the way, I am an "old timer" (48 now) and would say that for me the lenses are the main attraction in themselves, but generally, it's the overall "package" that counts, i.e. including frames, the way they're worn, hair, body (not necessarily slim) and dare I say it, personality. I also thought that my attraction to gwg might diminish after I started wearing glasses myself (firstly for reading, then mild presbyopia), but it hasn't.

Hope this helps...

India 11 Apr 2006, 07:03

So, Puffin, the poorer the sight,the better? Thanks.

Anyone else? Would love to hear from some of the "old timers" on this board - I see that there's quite a bit of history here. And you new guys who, like me, have just now "popped" in here - what intrigues you?

Puffin 09 Apr 2006, 16:01

For me it is the look of the lenses, and the story. I love to hear a woman tell me about her poor vision and about how her glasses help her see. Quite often I play dumb, as if I know absolutely nothing about the subject, innocently asking "are you long or short sighted?" as if I had not a clue...! Well, I like a few other things as well, but there you go, that's me.

india 09 Apr 2006, 15:53

Hi Pete - Thanks so much for your reply. You or anyone else here may email me at indianeweng@yahoo.com. Pete - so when did your attraction begin? Do you think it's a factor of being myopic yourself? I know that my attraction to guys in glasses (or who needed glasses) started once I knew I was nearsighted. For a long time a few years ago, I had an obsession with Kyle Secor - the guy on the US police show "Homicide." He started wearing glasses at some point halfwaqy into the series' run - I just loved the vulnerability factor(if that's what it indeed was for me) plus he's adorable - it's like when you have a new boyfriend and you stay over at his place and have time alone in say, the bedroom or bathroom, and discover a pair of glasses or contact solution. But Pete, with you, it sounds very specific (with the whole minus thing).

ehpc 09 Apr 2006, 10:22

post-script for India ...........I wear glasses myself, in the black rectangular plastic frames with very wide sides style I have described. I am about minus 7. Pete

ehpc 09 Apr 2006, 10:21

Hi India I am Pete 51-year-old Scottish classical concert pianist.Personally I am a 'frames' man...........to be sexually stimulating the woman concerned MUST be attractive anyway,and best combination of all is blonde hair,minus lenses,and 'serious' black plastic frames, preferably these very trendy black rectangulsr plastic frames with very wide sides. The lenses MUST be minus.I like the combination of blonde hair and 'serious' minus glasses, because it is a shorthand way of saying that the woman has everything one could ever wish for.............fun and sexuality (blonde) and high intelligence ('serious' glasses) I am happy to elucidate by e-mail if you wish,(if you request my e-mail address I will give it to you) but that's pretty much it for me:) Pete

india 09 Apr 2006, 10:06

OK, I came upon this site after doing a search for high myopia progression in adults. Some background on me - I'm 32, have worn glasses / contacts since age 12 (needed them before that, however). I thought that my myopia would stop progressing in my 20's, however. last checkup I was given an increase once again. It's impossible for me to go without glasses or contacts since I AM blind without(although not as blind as some of you on this site!) at -8 and -8.5, some astigmatism too.

But that's not why I'm writing this post. I'm forever astonished at peoples' motivations and means of expression - and had really not thought of eyesight/glasses as potential "fetish" as it does seem to be for some of you. I'm a grad student(no not in psych!) and would appreciate it if some of you would write a little about how you came to realize that glasses are a turn on. If anyone would rather, we can do a private email, but I'd prefer a bit of a discussion, if no one minds. Let me also state that I respect everyone's personal opinions and I am in no way here to "flame" anyone. I've actually always been attracted to men in glasses, being a girl in sometime glasses, myself. I just didn't know that some people take it to a whole new level! If this is the wrong venue, please point me in the right diredtion!

Question 08 Apr 2006, 01:16

I agree it seems that there a a lot more glasses wearers nowadays. Yes it is because they are more fashionable. If years ago people did avoid wearing them becuase they didn't like them I wonder how they got about. The people I see wearing glasses aren't all with very low prescriptions that would have just gone without in days gone by, there are lots with reasonable Rxs. Are there more people that need correction now? To what Rx might the previous generation have tolerated being glasses-less? Thanks!

lazysiow 07 Apr 2006, 01:07

oh well, as long as the golden age is locale based how about Finland?

I know a lot of us have gotten a lot of pleasure from the seemingly endless stream of Finnish girls who look amazing as well as perfectly happy in thier glasses :)

Tim 06 Apr 2006, 21:14

Lazysiow - I'm not so sure! In the West, few girls wear glasses as a fashion statement. The overwhelming majority of GWGs do so because their eyes cannot tolerate contacts and they have been turned down for (or are terrified of) refractive surgery.

Here in SE Asia, where myopia is so much more prevalent, the situation is a little different and some girls do seem to wear their glasses with pride and pleasure, but I never seem to see anyone much over about -5!

lazysiow 06 Apr 2006, 20:48

I think we are in the golden age now, socially acceptable is one thing, but back then most people would walk around blind rather than admit they have to wear glasses.

Nowadays glasses are much more fashionable and more common, and even though we have options like contacts and lasik, you still see people wearing them just for fashion

LikeGlass 06 Apr 2006, 19:53

I suspect that as one grows older, they are more likely to be "open" about such fascinations. When you are young, you are too fearful of being tagged as a weirdo or freak, and would be less likely to post in a public forum, even when anonymous. I suspect that the fascination with GWGs is probably ageless. Most of us were "patterned" at an early age, for me, it was 2nd grade, 40 some years ago. Girls in that age group still wear glasses, so I suspect somewhere out there, young "future" GWG lovers are still being formed.

Tim 06 Apr 2006, 19:32

Chris B - I entirely agree with your post of 23rd March. You make many interesting and valid points. Particularly the one about symmetry; I guess that explains why I have never been turned on by people with widely different prescriptions for each eye!

When I first discovered this site some 2/3 weeks ago, I was (like many first-time visitors) astonished and delighted to discover that I was by no means unique in my fascination with GWGs, but rather that there are many of us out there. It does seem, however, that we are overwhelmingly "of a certain age"!

Is this because we are a dying breed? Certainly the 50s, 60s and early 70s was the golden age, when it became socially acceptable to correct one's vision, but before contacts became widespread or refractive surgery was even dreamed of.

Or is it merely that we oldies, being more or less retired, are the only people who regularly have time to post here?

I would appreciate your (and anyone else's) thoughts.

Wayne 30 Mar 2006, 20:21

I'm am wondering what the person who's doing these fake posts gets out of this behavior -- first Julian and now Wei. It all seems absurd and foolish to me. Unfortunately, anyone can post here using any name they want. I guess that's part of why most discussion lists require unique usernames and passwords.

Getting back to the topic of unsuitable frames --

While certainly some people seem to have no sense in choosing a frame, another problem is the lack of real choice in shopping for frames. So many of the shops seem to carry only what's considered to be currently in fashion. There's a shop in Denver that brags of having several thousand frames in stock. Probably 90% are wire-rims with a barely noticeable difference between them.

And fashion seems to change very quickly these days. Several times I've found a frame I really liked and then couldn't replace it when it wore out after a couple of years because it was no longer made.

Wei 30 Mar 2006, 11:27

Thank you I try ignore fake Wei now. I respond because after i post very much i get many person saying go away!! And fake Wei make it seem i make many more posts than do. I think now you know fake Wei posts.

Can anyone guess indetity fake Wei? I have suspecision of Derek...

Julian 28 Mar 2006, 14:47

FAO = For the attention of

Hansel, you took the words out of my mouth.

Wurm, how about doing as Hansel suggests? Then there would be no doubt when posts headed 'Wei' are from imposters. It certainly cramped pseudoJulian's style.

28 Mar 2006, 13:51

maybe Frequently asked Questions?

Bret 28 Mar 2006, 13:49

Hansel, who is FAO?

Hansel 28 Mar 2006, 11:54

FAO Fake Wei: the idea is getting a bit too predictable. I think you need to give it a rest. It seems to me that what you seem to be doing is "internet bullying".

FAO The Real Wei: Might I suggest that you approach Wurm to have your name logged with him as Julian has, who for a while was subject to the imposters.

As one may recall I did comment that I felt that at one point Wei was guilty of "overposting", BUT it is fair to note that he has been less prolific in recent weeks. Unlike the fake(s), however, he does try to discuss/comment on topics, as opposed to the fakes whose approach is entirely negative.

still 28 Mar 2006, 11:49

Again, as I said elsewhere, Wei, do not respond to this fool or these fools.

Wei 28 Mar 2006, 11:36

Guess what everybody? I start lessons in not being stupid idiot who trys make fun at person because he not like what they say! But I think I too stupid for it work.

Wei 28 Mar 2006, 10:51

Guess what everybody?! Me start English lessons today. How I do?

Wei 28 Mar 2006, 07:27

Two more stupid posts below. Who are you? You very offensive not for me only but for other like 4eyes. Whatever I say you may disagree of course but child like personal insult not needed. I never made personal insult remark posting to any one here. Peolpe may have disagree with me in some posting i make but I never post for insult or swearing.

Wei 28 Mar 2006, 06:00

I very sorry for saying that I had just a very painfull period lots of blood stained my thong make me stressed and say stuff I would normally not say.

Wei 28 Mar 2006, 04:00

I think i know why now people offend me. me think my penis is small really and no life sex future in...maybe I am Yoda

Wei 28 Mar 2006, 02:28

Yes this post about frame style is from real Wei! Why certain persons so angry when I most I not know why but thank you Puffin and ehpc. Yes, some people do not think whether frame suits them and I wish they not choose certain style just for being in fashion. Seems to be problem recently. There are many unusual frames but on wrong face look awful. I wish these people choose frame more carefully.

ehpc 28 Mar 2006, 00:27

Wei's posts are cool! Leave him alone:) He is an amusing and nice bloke! Pete

Puffin 27 Mar 2006, 16:19

I do believe Wei is onto something (assuming this is the original Wei, that is!) No need to swear if you disagree with a point raised just say so.

long time listener first time 27 Mar 2006, 16:09

Caller

Wei

I'll give u ann original thort! FUCK OFF!

Wei 27 Mar 2006, 11:06

Why do people copy frame styles? yes i know there fashions change but rteally i think people need be more indepedent of thought with frame choosing and choose what they really want. I think people influence and copy too much. why they all want look the same. Express individual thought i say!

NCV 24 Mar 2006, 14:42

5 years ago I started wearing glasses with just a -1.50. Though I liked them alot I was kind of shy to put them on so only wore them when I had to. Now a few years later I've worked through a number of small increases and have arrived at -2.25 and -2.75. I don't wear them all the time - should I? - but it thrills me to realise that I'm walking down the street and notice I can't see faces, clocks or street signs. I know it sounds bizarre. I wonder if I did wear them more or all of the time if this thrill would disappear. Or would I get dependent on them and the thrill would come from knowing I can't do without them. Either way I'm pretty happy.

ChrisB 23 Mar 2006, 15:39

Fetishism, Paraphilia, a Celebration of glasses wearing, or an exploration of 'attractiveness' sexual or platonic?

Firstly - ES, as a site is host to all of those things and more - which is why, to Wurm's credit it has flourished for so many years when most independent text based sites have come and gone.

This very topic has flourished on ES several times before. Is attraction to, or an interest in the wearing of glasses on oneself or other people, fetishistic paraphilic? It can be but not exclusively so.

The Fetishist/paraphilic wants the object of their attention (male or female, or themselves) to be impaired, and most likely increasingly so. Their behaviour is motivated by a number of different factors, some of which can be benign, but some of which are very harmful such as Munchausens Syndrome by proxy.

On-the-other-hand-

Attraction to people wearing glasses, without the paraphilic component, is harder to explain - but so is nearly all sexual attraction between animals. There are whole University Departments producing experiments and papers on the subject. A simple example is facial symmetry. Test subjects, both male and female will score non symetrical faces consistently less attractive than symmetrical faces. What does a pair of glasses do but give the impression of symmetry to a persons face, where it might not otherwise exist? - but thats very oversimplifying the answer - there have to be lots of other factors. When we believe someone wearing plano's - the effect is diminished because subconsiously we are aware the subject is faking it.

when this debate was raging on ES in its early days I wrote a piece of fiction called 'The Train Journey' which attempted to give some kind of answer. I no longer have a copy but - I will try to go back thro Bobby's archive site to see if I can find it - unless anyone knows of the story on any of the affiliated sites?

ChrisB

ehpc 13 Mar 2006, 16:03

Clare.................black rectangular plastic frames with wide sides and minus lenses worn by a blonde is the HOTTEST PHENOMENON IMAGINABLE:)Pete

George1968 13 Mar 2006, 16:03

My frames are brown tortoise-shell horn rims. Talk about bold.

Note: a female teacher who wore gold rim frames (though mostly on her head) showed up today wearing frames the style of which is very close to yours. She looked outstanding!

Clare 13 Mar 2006, 14:24

George 1968 - I hope you're right, I'm still a bit self conscious about them - they seem very 'black', especially with those great wide arms. I love the look of them, just wonder how great they look on me. They could look all dominant black frame on a blonde. Brown might have been a better choice, softer colour. And you - what frames are you wearing nowadays, still with the rimless?

George1968 12 Mar 2006, 15:14

Clare,

Trust me. You don't need courage to wear those specs. You would look incredibly hot in them. The only courage you would need is if you are afriad of the crowd of men who would descend upon you.

ehpc 12 Mar 2006, 12:01

'Alain Mikli'

ehpc 12 Mar 2006, 12:00

'just'

ehpc 12 Mar 2006, 11:59

Clare.................as you know I jus adore blondes with minus lenses and black rectangular plastic frames with very wide sides:) I have Alain Miklio glasses just like that! Pete

Clare 12 Mar 2006, 11:09

ehpc

Great you like wide sides! I'm having to pluck up all my courage to wear my new wide sided specs!!! They seem so obvious!

ehpc 12 Mar 2006, 07:48

Wow:) Nice heavy minus:) Do you have some black rectangular plastic frames:) MY FAVE:)Pete

Sarah 12 Mar 2006, 07:35

My prescription as of the last eye test I had was -9.75 sphere -1.50 cyl 90 deg in the right eye and -11.75 sphere -2.25 cyl 100 deg in my left eye. I wear black metal frames which are oval but I have loads of older glasses which I sometimes wear.

ehpc 11 Mar 2006, 10:06

You sound cool Sarah:) What style of frames do you wear? Black rectangular plastic frames with wide sides:) ? Pete

Curious 11 Mar 2006, 09:46

Hi Sarah

What's your prescription?

Sarah 11 Mar 2006, 09:43

Hi everyone

Up until now I had thought I was a little weird. You see I actually enjoy wearing glasses and even enjoy my myopia. I love having the option of taking my glasses off and seeing the world like a Monet painting (which I do quite often). Even through childhood I didn't mind my glasses despite occasional teasing. I thought they made me a bit different and a little more grown up. Everyone else I knew with glasses hated them which I couldn't understand. I admit that I do own contacts but only wear them when glasses are impractical. It's great to find like minded individuals and to finally realise I'm not alone in my weirdness so thank you all.

Hollie 08 Mar 2006, 06:33

I've worn my contacts on flights before and it's been OK, but for a long haul would definitely switch to glasses or just go bare-eyed.

Clare 06 Mar 2006, 22:58

George1968 - yes I still go mostly bare-eyed at the weekend, but not 100% of the time of course!

George1968 04 Mar 2006, 07:20

Clare,

It's the weekend. Isn't this the time you go bare-eyed?

Clare 03 Mar 2006, 22:28

George 1968 - have to admit its mostly still the rimless, 'though I like the idea of the bold ones so maybe I'll go with them today. It mostly depends on what I'm wearing.

George1968 03 Mar 2006, 15:15

Clare,

Are you wearing the new, bolder glasses or the older rimless ones when you are not wearing contact lenses? Any reactions to the new glasses?

Clare 03 Mar 2006, 13:48

I've often wondered about this too. On a short flight to Frankfurt last week, with a colleague, I wore my glasses out but on the way back I decided to see what *happens* with CLs on a flight. It was okay. Yes, it may have been drying, but it was mostly fine. I probably wouldn't bother next time though!

ehpc 25 Feb 2006, 11:04

Do it,Nicole:) Think how hot you'd feel:) I feel hot thinking about you doing it:) Pete

Puffin 25 Feb 2006, 02:51

Seen it happen on a flight London-Dublin, saw someone swap from contacts to glasses before boarding.

Kathy 24 Feb 2006, 17:59

Nicole, I know a lot of people who won't wear their contacts on a long flight. It has something to do with the air on the plane drying their eyes out. Good luck wearing your glasses on the flight.

-U- 24 Feb 2006, 16:59

you are entitled to wear your glasses any old time you like - even a short walk to the mailbox is ok!

guest 24 Feb 2006, 14:57

Yes I've often enjoyed that too. Wonder how long the flight has to be before it renders CL wear impossible.

Would a short flight, London-Edinburgh, qualify?

Puffin 24 Feb 2006, 14:13

Yes, the recycled air on airliners is notoriously dry and unfriendly to contact lens wearers. I often see glasses wearers on planes and know they don't usually wear them.

Nicole 24 Feb 2006, 13:58

Kathy - maybe I should, maybe I will.

I'm really thinking of wearing glasses on Monday, I have to take a flight with some colleagues. I keep thinking about it:)) Of course I could do without specs and rely on them (they don't know I wear them, that's how new this glasses thing is for me). Seeing signs would be difficult. I'm fantasing & thinking I could/should keep them on ALL day and act like I usually wear contacts. Isn't it usual for contacts wearers not to wear them on a flight?

tina 24 Feb 2006, 12:24

I fail behind in my first test. i,m a little behind on second

Tod 24 Feb 2006, 10:11

Tanya, you and I have simular eyesight and and a love for wearing glasses. !!

Tanya 20 Feb 2006, 16:26

Hi Everyone

The average person doesn't know if glasses are weak,strong,plus,or minus. My own RX is only +1.00 with an add of +2.00 but I wear them full-time and never feel guilty, although I only really "need" them to read and for close-up tasks. I can see well enough without my glasses to leagally drive in the UK, although I can see better with them on

Tanya

Bronwyn 20 Feb 2006, 11:51

nicole

i understand the thrill and the guilt. my prescription is only -0.75 and i wear my glasses for much of the time. i feel guilt when someone looks through my glasses because they then know how really weak that they are. i even feel guilt if someone is standing behind me and and can look through my glasses. strangely for me, that is also part of the thrill.

lazysiow 20 Feb 2006, 04:56

Doh, I meant no one seems to notice how weak they are (someone even said that they look pretty strong LOL) and treat them like I really do need them all the time

Lazysiow 20 Feb 2006, 04:55

Nicole, when that happens to me I sometimes imagine that its because my eyesight is getting worse and that my glasses aren't strong enough anymore, although no one else seems to notice.

I'm dying to chat with you too by the way, seems like we have quite a bit of "coming out" in common :)

Kathy 19 Feb 2006, 15:46

Nicole, I would think that you would want to wear your glasses all the time at -2.00. Mine is -3.00 and I wear mine rain or shine. Have fun.

Nicole 19 Feb 2006, 14:00

Bronwyn

For me it's a mixture of thrill and guilt, weird eh. When I say guilt, I mean I know -2 isn't the strongest prexcription in the world.Today I was walking out with a friend for a couple of hours, it rained all the time and even though I wore a hood my glasses were splattered with rain. i rather liked that even though my vision was rain splattered with rain it was still better than without, like I could see signs - that gave me a thrill to think i do need them. I kept them on the whole 2 hours.

Bronwyn 19 Feb 2006, 10:53

lazysiow

that makes us even because you have definitely caught my interest. i won't be chatting on a friday or saturday night though. i really want to chat with you.

lazysiow 18 Feb 2006, 23:06

You got me curious enough that I popped into chat just now :)

Pick a time, hopefully I'll see you there :D

Bronwyn 18 Feb 2006, 15:37

nicole

i feel exactly the same way when i put my glasses on. i do feel excited by my own wonderfully weak glasses.

Bronwyn 18 Feb 2006, 15:34

lazysiow

thinking of you in those wonderfully weak glasses of yours excites me. it makes me want to apply to optometry school so that i could strap you into my exam chair. i would remove your glasses first and test your excellent bare-eyed vision without them while playing with your glasses. before i put them back on on you i would of course polish your lenses on the stress point of the front of your trousers. we really need to chat! you make me hot!

Wei 18 Feb 2006, 12:21

but I not post love note below!

Puffin 18 Feb 2006, 10:36

Yes, but it's a fair question.

Wei 18 Feb 2006, 08:47

So I not post for some time and come back see some stupid person pretend be me again. Not funny.

Nicole 18 Feb 2006, 05:00

Wei - no I haven't

I'm 28 and -2.

Wei 17 Feb 2006, 21:13

Nicole, you make love with glasses?

17 Feb 2006, 21:04

Nicole- You sound like a dream come true! What is your prescription and how old are you? What is your visual acuity without your glasses on?

Nicole 17 Feb 2006, 12:54

Guys I'm glad to hear I'm not so weird. Like I said I don't wear all the time, though I'd be happy to so maybe I just should. Funny though I sometimes make out my eyesight is worse than it is - even if I can see okay I'll say I can't, or I'll tell people I'm wearing contacts. I'd laugh to guess what people who know about these things think my prescription is based on my behaviour. I like to think about what people I know might think about me wearing glasses, of course like they even care I know but it keeps me busy.

Lazysiow 17 Feb 2006, 12:24

The cards are definitely on the table here! I'm the same way. Can't believe your mate actually admitted to the optometrist. I hope she was female and a looker ;)

It's still one of the easiest way for me to get a boner is to slip mine on. When I was younger, even sunglasses would do it for me, now not anymore. It took me two years to go "almost" full time. At least I can make myself settle down after 5 or 10 minutes these days so it's not so embarassing. It would be worse to lose this fetish completely though. Definitely cheaper than viagara for the later years I'm thinking :)

All my eye doctors have been male sadly, but on my second pair even though they were pretty weak the lady assistant took them out and put them on for me. She had me lean very close as if they were very strong and slipped them on. I thought I was going to shoot a hole through my trousers as she fussed over me adjusting them and checking how they fit around my ears etc, even though she was almost three times my age. The icing on the cake was she was saying the whole time that "they're just going to get stronger and stronger". I ended up quickly making an excuse that I wanted to see how they looked and dashed off for the nearest mirror which would have my back turned so she wouldn't notice. Waist level thank god :D

I'm actually holding off my next eye exam until I came across a lady eye doctor :)

Julian 17 Feb 2006, 07:02

Phil: now the cards are on the table! Don't you think the arousal would die off if you did wear your glasses full time, as you'd have to do if you were a bit more myopic? It isn't a matter for the doctor; a friend of mine went to see his doctor and complained he got a boner every time he put his glasses on. The doctor's response was, "Some buggers have all the luck." ::)

ehpc 17 Feb 2006, 06:29

You sound VERY hot and desireable Nicole:) Pete

Phil 17 Feb 2006, 01:40

Nicole, I'm not sure than Len(s) Crafter has quite got your point. I think you are describing a sexual frisson connected with glasses. I know exactly what you mean. When I was going through puberty I fantasised about girls wearing glasses and about wearing glasses myself. I am only attracted to girls in specs, preferably minus (around -2 to -4 is perfect). I sometimes feel aroused when wearing specs myself. That's at least partly why I don't wear fulltime even though I'm -3.5 ish and should. It's more than a point about fashion, isn't it Nicole?

Len(s) Crafter 16 Feb 2006, 21:37

Nicole

If a woman chooses to color her hair, is she doing something wrong?

If a man chooses to wear a ring, other than a wedding ring, is he doing something neurotic?

Choosing to wear glasses, is simply a choice to adorn your face with a something like jewelry. I've heard it said that a woman wearing thick lenses in her glasses is wearing eye jewelry. I suppose that holds true even if they aren't thick.

If you can afford two, or three pair of glasses, go for it! Celebrate the fact that you like something, and are able to have it.

Sincerely,

Lennie

16 Feb 2006, 14:26

Nicole- You just made me hot thinking about you wearing your glasses. I feel the same way. How old are you and what is your prescription?

Nicole 16 Feb 2006, 14:10

I can only admit this anonymously on a site like this, but I get pretty hot thinking about wearing glasses. I dont even wear them all the time, but I do fantasize about it. I even think about what my friends think about me wearing glasses and people that know I wear them but havent seen me. Till I found this site I wondered if I was normal. I really like wearing glasses but dont need them all the time, sometimes I wish I did. I think maybe Im compensating for my shyness by fantasizing like this. I dont feel uncomfortable about it but guess its a bit of a no-win. Id really like to hear others thoughts and what they've done if they feel the same please.

Nicole

Kornwyn 10 Feb 2006, 13:27

Which way ya goin, Billee?

Bronwyn 10 Feb 2006, 12:32

billy

I am 22. I wear my glasses quite a bit too!

billy 10 Feb 2006, 08:08

ok how old are you? Im 21 and didnt think i would wear my glasses much, but after i got used to them i wear thme the majority of the time. How come you got glasses, were you having problems with your eyesight before?

Bronwyn 07 Feb 2006, 15:32

billy

I got my glasses in the very beginning of September.

my prescription is -0.75 for both of my lenses.

Bronwyn 07 Feb 2006, 15:32

billy

I got my glasses in the very beginning of September.

my prescription is -0.75 for both of my lenses.

billy 07 Feb 2006, 08:45

Bronwyn 05 Feb 2006, 10:52

hi billy

new glasses? me too!! we need to get together!

Hiya Bronwyn, yeah i have just got my first glasses, was having trouble reading the board at uni. How about yourself, how long have you had yours, and whats your prescription?

Julian 05 Feb 2006, 11:16

Anonymous poster: to the pure all things are pure. Your suspicions may be well-foundedon the other hand they may not.

05 Feb 2006, 11:05

Jessica is twelve years old and had her eyes tested yesterday, and twenty four hours later is posting on a discussion thread of a glasses fetish site. C'mon fellas. I don't think you need to get excited about this one.

Bronwyn 05 Feb 2006, 10:52

hi billy

new glasses? me too!! we need to get together!

billy 03 Feb 2006, 12:19

Hi Jessica, don't worry about needing glasses. I was prescribed glasses afew months ago, and had the same feelings as you. When you get your glasses and realise how clearly you can see with them, you will soon learn to love them. How come you got your eyes tested? Do you know what your prescription is? Remember dont worry about them and wear them with pride!!!

Curt 03 Feb 2006, 11:12

Jessica: Think about it this way --- are you any less of a person because you have a pair of glasses sitting on your nose? If you are smart, pretty, funny...you will still be all those things with glasses. Your glasses will show people that you are smart enough to recognize that you have a slight problem (you can't see well far away), and that this is an easy problem that can be fixed (by wearing glasses). By picking out some classy frames, you are also showing people that you have confidence in yourslef and a good sense of fashion.

Wear your glasses with pride, be glad that you now can see clearly, and ignore all those people who would make fun of you because you are now bespectacled. Millions of people around the world wear glasses...you are not alone, or different!

New Specs 03 Feb 2006, 09:28

Hello:

My name is Jessica. I am 12 years old and had my eyes checked yesterday and found out for the first time that I will have to wear glasses (and full time - - I am nearsighted) The frames will be ready next week. While I'm glad I will be able to see better, I am very nervous about having to wear glasses, as I have never worn them before and to say the least I'm sure it is going to be very ackward, escpecailly at school. I hate to say it, but I started balling when I found out that I needed glasses. I took a long time to pick out the frames as I debated between a more tame metal frame and a more bold plastic frames. I got the dark squarish plastic frames (very similar to Ashliegh Banfield's) so I am "going all out" with these frames.

I'm better know as I am resigned to the fact that I will have to wear them full time, but looking for any advice in adapting to being bespecled and 4 eyes.

Any ideas/insight would be greatly appreciated. Thanks

Hollie 13 Dec 2005, 11:46

Jessica

When I first got my plastic framed ones all I could see was the frames! They seemed to be everywhere I looked! My pair before this were semi-rimless and I always used to look at the bottom of those.

Am getting new glasses soon! Went for an eye test and my right eye has changed a bit. Picked out a new frame with a thick metal front and wide plastic arms- getting bold with my choices now I think!

leelee 13 Dec 2005, 09:58

Lazy,

I know what you mean - all the stores sell the same frames as everyone else. I guess the chains are trying to differentiate themselves from the old mom & pop stores which kept old styles on the shelf until they sold them. But when the stores toss all of the old out to stock only the very latest style then its just boring.

There have been a couple of times when I've been flush with cash the last few years when I'd wander into one of these stores thinking "hmm, maybe a second pair? Maybe some sunglasses?, maybe a reading only pair?" only to leave without parting with any cash since they all just sell a thousand variations of the same frame. I think they are losing marketing opportunities.

Melyssa 13 Dec 2005, 04:22

Jessica,

I've done the same thing. My first pair (in 1964) was a modified cat's-eye frame. Wearing them part-time (just for seeing the blackboard in school, and for watching TV or movies), I would look at the upper corners of the inside of the frames. I did it a lot when I got my first drop-temples, just to see the difference. These days I do it maybe once per wearing for each of my 30 pairs of glasses.

Phil 13 Dec 2005, 00:57

Hi Jessica! Yes I do that too. I've had specs for nearly 30 years. I'm now -3.5 amd -3.25 with +2 and wear varifocals. I should be fulltime but only wear for driving, cinema, shopping etc. Just get through squinting rest of the time! Are you myopic too? What's your rx?

Jessica 12 Dec 2005, 13:02

I wasn't sure where to post this, but here goes: Ever since I got glasses 21 years ago, I've had the habit of looking at the inside corners of them to make sure I'm wearing them, or what the frame is. I did it alot when I wore them part time, not so much since wearing them full time. Has anyone else ever done this "checking"?

OttO 27 Nov 2005, 08:17

Hi All:

Here's a funny to warm the cockles of your heart!

http://www.comics.com/creators/workingitout/archive/workingitout-20051121.html

Puffin 08 Nov 2005, 17:17

I've seen this for years and years, never seen a model in one of these in anything resembling a real pair of prescription lenses. Who are they trying to kid?

Lazysiow 08 Nov 2005, 03:39

I've started collecting Lenscrafters catalogs any time they come out as a kind of glasses softporn if you will. The same way guys will get Victoria's Secret catalogs etc lol.

The only thing that bugs me is the over emphasis on "Trendy" frames, usually rectangle-ish preppy/executive looking with no prescription in them. Half of them I think are actually a pretty shitty fit.

Kinda sucks, but hey. Anyone else doing this?

Wei 07 Nov 2005, 10:57

I like girl wear glasses if she like glasses also I think is way glasses can make look different and mystery! I liking best unusual glasses it making intersting point of person i think!

Bobby 15 Oct 2005, 02:26

I know why I like girls with glasses: because they turn me on, however I do not know, why the particular fact they need to wear glasses turn me on. 8-)

Puffin 15 Oct 2005, 02:02

Yes, I understand you here. I wonder why I like girls with glasses. There is only one "why" - it's because they're good! I know that's hardly an answer, but it's the only one that makes sense.

Bobby 15 Oct 2005, 01:28

I have been thinking about the reason why I have alwys wanted to be very nearsighted for all my life. I have tried to remember when it started. I have tried to find a kind of "trigger event" in my life, that might have induce the feelings and the desire. I have tried to ask people form this website and have read ëverything that was written about it here, in the old Eye Scene at the WVF, and I searched Internet to get as much information about paraphilia as I could. What is the result? I think could give a 12 hour lecture about the topic without being able to understand the f***ing "why". I do not know why. The only thing I know is that I will probably never know why.

Specs4ever 14 Oct 2005, 17:18

Bill, if you find out, let me know please.

Puffin 14 Oct 2005, 13:56

I wonder also if these people who want high myopia, and the attendant thick glasses might have a subconcious desire for sympathy - they like having things said like "poor .... with those thick glasses, it must be terrible". In todays rather uncaring society, maybe a little sympathy & consideration - if only for a moment - is what they might be looking for?

Wei 14 Oct 2005, 11:03

I think wish of poor sight is leading from desires to be diferent also. I think certin person always wish for what he not have! I have -16D myopic but consider implants now. Perhaps if I have 20/20 I want poor sight instead to be diferent! But I tell all person wanting poor sight you may be not want permancy of this!

Puffin 14 Oct 2005, 07:38

I have to confess that I have perfect vision, and no great wish to wear glasses, only to see and admire lovely ladies with thick glasses. However, for me, my individuality is very important, my uniqueness, I'm always ready to do the exact opposite of what fashion dictates. At the moment it's fashionable to have lasik, and it's fair to say that, unfortunately for us OO's, it's never been particularly fashionable to wear thick (and hence ugly) glasses.

So, perhaps the desire to wear thick glasses is some sort of expression of someone wanting to stand out from the crowd and be unique? And presumably if the induced myopia is permanent, then it's going to be far more convenient than fiddling around with contact lenses

under those glasses.

Bill 14 Oct 2005, 06:41

What is the root or psychological origin when one yearns to be severely myopic? It has been my passion to be myopic from early childhood to no avail. Current culture wants to undergo laser correction, hence, I do not understand my fetish! Can anyone lend insight?

woodframes 07 Oct 2005, 21:37

Good day,

I am a maker of hand carved wooden glasses, each being specific in design and construction to the desires of the customer. I personally pick all my woods to ensure uniqueness and quality. If anyone is interested in a one in a kind pair of eyewear, feel free to contact me as we could discuss further the possibilities of custom wooden frames.

Scott Urban

8hhhhhhhh8@gmail.com

Hyperfan 26 Sep 2005, 06:47

What about you, Shyiris ?

Wei 10 Sep 2005, 09:04

Jarred - problem not really of look of glasses or visual difficuty. Main problem heavy weight of glasses cause soreness and disconfort. Myodisc much lighter so much better I think. Visual aciuty not very good but I adjust for small visual field now and like myodisc very much. I also please myosdisc look thinner but look not most vital aspect I think. I also had problem putting contact in eye which now resolve so also I have contact which give good vision.

I upset when person want make eye worse when I have difficulty for many year!

Castus - if read thread on vision training you see can work.

Cactus 10 Sep 2005, 08:46

Jarred -- Your previous post was very thoughtful and well written. If I may add my two cents on the subject of vision training.

Before investing time and money, I would like to suggest reading a critical review of the "See Clearly Method" which is extensively marketed in the US. The link is http://www.allaboutvision.com/buysmart/see_clearly.htm. Another technique is "The Bates Method" which has been around for 70-80 years (Bates died in 1931).

It appears that neither one will do any harm to your vision but, it is unlikely that either will have any lasting effect on the optical system of your eye.

To make any lasting difference, either the eyeball would have to change length or the lens would have to change thickness. There is evidence that the eyeball can grow longer (increasing myopia) or the lens can get fatter (same effect) but I've never seen anything about the reverse happening.

These are nice, appealing ideas, but mostly, these techniques seem to improve the vision of the seller when he looks at this bank statement.

If there is an improvement, it seems to be mostly psychological. And, there may be improvement, with the trainiig, in the image processing capability of the brain - which seems to be incredible to start with. Of course, you may just THINK you can see beter.

We've seen what modern computer image processing could do with the early pictures from the Hubble Space Telescope. But even with that capability, the best (albeit expensive) solution was to fly the shuttle up and fix its vision with "glasses". The result of which has been those incredible pictures of the universe.

Hyperfan 10 Sep 2005, 08:45

To Shyiris

I can realise, beut I cannot understand. My next girlfriend was wearing +10 with +2 add, and she was only 23 years old. No problem with theses glasses, no problem in social life, and no problem with boy friends...

OF course, wearing glasses full time.

Please tell us, what about you : do your wear your glasses full time ? And what about social life and boy friends ?

Thanks.

Jarred 10 Sep 2005, 07:25

Hi Wei, Its good that you have learned about your vision problems. I also have learned as much as I can about mine (thanks to the internet) which has helped me understand the problem and also realise that for years the real problem was never diagnosed.

Im pretty sure that my vision problems held me back at school, I've caught up now but as I could never see anything clearly that was closer than about 5 feet away, so reading and close study never realy caught on with me.

Even now although I can clearly see things close up it can be a strain.

It is quite interesting that even though we have both had our own type of dificulties, that wearing glasses or the associated dificulties don't bother me, but it does seem to bother you?

Trying to convince people of vision training and even some sort of surgical treatment should be approached carefully. I would recomend that anyone even slightly considering such an approach should find out as much as they can about all the dangers as well as the advantages. I personally have seen enough on the internet which has convinced me that any form of surgical intervention should only be tried if you have nothing to lose. I am correctd to 20 20 with glasses and with contacts before my prism got too high (I realise I am lucky) so unless that was threatened I would not get lasered or implants. The risks are too high.

I am interested whether your unhappy ness with glasses is one of looks or the vision problems? You have gone to a lot of trouble to get used to wearing myodiscs and the distorsions with them. I would have worn the lenses which give me the best possible quality of vision and not cared about what they look like to others. I even rejected high index lenses because of the colour abberations they produce (with prism anyway) the prisns are bad enough but when they are in high index lens material for some reason all you see are rainbows!

Wei 10 Sep 2005, 03:46

Thank you for reply Jarred you comment very interesting. I not want repeat greatly with for fear for upsetting of some but I explain my view for you.

I not anti glasses as you say but I endure many difficulty - old glasses very thick and heavy. I now have myodisc and contact which of great relief. I learn much of how eye work and vision training in past weeks and want help other improve vision but no success I fear!

You glasses very complex - have you good aciuty with glasses?

Regards from Wei.

Jarred 09 Sep 2005, 16:33

Hi Shyiris,

I don't have as high a sphere component in my prscription as you but my astigmatism is a little higher. When I could wear contacts myself before the amount of prism I have crept up I used to have similar problems as you with the contacts moving about. For astigmatism they are beleive it or not weighted at the bottom to keep the axis correct. Needless to say if you were not standing upright and blink a few times mine certainly started to rotate, once the axis is then off it can actually make your astigmatism twice as bad as it is. There is not much you can really do about it other than understand it happens.

However they should not move about so much that this happens just by blinking? I assume that you have highlighted this with the person fitting the lenses?

Once again I would not get so down about wearing glasses. Imagine what state you would be in if you didn't have them! Just look around you at other people wearing glasses, I see people wearing high index rimless titanium glasses obviously not trying to make much of a statement with them. Then you see those with really promenent frames who are making a real statement. Quite a few of them are in a similar posision to you and may also feel the same way.

I have a work mate who has a prescription at about a +7.00 there is a noticable magnification effect of the eyes but not one that is excessive and really makes you take notice.

I do know how frustrating it can be to not be able to see anything close up, often I have thought that if you were shortsighted you were better off, especially putting in contacts, you just get close to them to see them. If you're significantly longsighted it's almost impossible!

But the grass is always greener as they say. often with a hyperope the corrected vision can be better than a myope simply because of the magnification effect. I still think you should persevere with the contacts. Once you have a choice as to whether to wear glasses or not then when you're wearing glasses its not so bad.

09 Sep 2005, 15:18

Hi Jarred - yes I just don't understand why the contacts don't work, they have got them so I can see fine with them, then I blink and it takes a while for them to float back into position again, so obviously this distorts my vision.

Yes my glasses can look thinner and lighter than ever, but that does not change my prescription and my eyes still look massive in them. I think there is no way to stop the eyelash thing, it happens with all the glasses i have ever been fitted for, it is just and unfortunate combination of eyelash length and where my nose is in relation to my eyes :/ what on earth is the optometrist to do?

I trimmed my lashes last night, which improves the comfort of my glasses but I am now upset that I have trimmed my lashes, it's like I have lost some of my femininity :( :( :9 All this is getting me very down.

Here is my prescription anyway

R sph + 5.50 cyl +1.75 axis 100

L sph +5.50 cyl +2.00 axis 90

Jarred 09 Sep 2005, 11:43

Hi Wei, Please dont being me into it ;) , Peronally I have no problem with you posting here. But I think maybe the problem is that some people think you post quite a lot. And you english is fine! Assuming that you are from the far east, your English is much better than any of my foreign languages.

To stay on topic, You seem to almost be quite anti glasses? Taking into account that the majority of the people that post here either don't mind or even enjoy wearing their glasses is surprises me that you seem to want to convert people away from their glasses.

Have you had a bad experience in the past with yours?

I have quite a wacky prescription with prisms and trifocals (because I couldn't get on with varifocals), I have had some people notice my glasses but the majority don't comment. Even if they do I'm not botherd.

Unlike you I am more concerned about the quality of vision with my glasses, than how they look to everyone else. My lenses are about 10mm thick at the edge, if they ended up 15mm thick it still wouldn't bother me (I think!).

Wei 09 Sep 2005, 10:29

It of interest to me that many people no longer want my presencebut when I read reply of Jarred to shyiris, content of advise very similar but Jarred English better than I able to express.

So Jarred OK to give advise but not for me.

I very upset by comments made. I enjoy reading posts on site and wish make contribution.

Wei 09 Sep 2005, 08:52

Chilita: I try not be offended by your comment.

Chilita 09 Sep 2005, 08:29

No more Wei!!

Jarred 09 Sep 2005, 05:37

Hi Shy Iris, First of all, don't feel too bad about your glasses. It sounds to me that you may have a problem with the fitting of the glasses, they certainly shouldnt be touching your eyelashes, that would drive me mad! Do you know your full prescription? It might provide a little more information. I'm confused by your statement that people comment on your glases a lot? I'm surprised that you havent had much luck with contact lenses. There could be a number of reasons why, if you have any more information about the probelms you've had with them there might be something we can suggest. I would suggest trying to understand your prescription better and learn whats best for you. Talk to your optician in detail about your problems and experiences and make sure you get whats best for you. +5.50 with high index lenses and anti reflective coatings can look light and thin. A good frame choice can also work wonders, take a friend along, treat them as a fasion item. But don't feel too bad about them, you are in good company. I would persevere with the contact lens option If possible, it would at least give you the choice which will make you feel better over all.

Wei 09 Sep 2005, 04:41

Yes, I sypathize very much with problem. Is difficult to find resolution perhaps in this case. My sugestions of possible relief:

Perhaps certain frame style of glasses reduce eyelash problem? I think perhaps you try many frame already but you maybe in need further advise from optometrist?

For contact: I too try with contact many times with failure due to difficulty of seeing lens and putting in eye but now finally resolve problem and have good contacts and put in eye OK. If you unable see through contact you need find optometrist with expertize on contact. You maybe need try different kind lens?

Also, you perhap need investigate lens implant further. Even with vision not perfect with implant, maybe you not need glasses all time?

I hopeful you have relief of problem soon. Best wishes from Wei.

09 Sep 2005, 01:01

Hello, I have been wearing glasses since I was old enough to speak and tell them i couldn't see the letters on the eye chart :)

My prescription is + 5.50 with astigmatism numbers added in there too.

I have tried countless times for contact lenses at different opticians, they said that they fit right, are the right prescription, but could not understand why I can't see out of them, basically no one has been able to fit me correctly with them.

I considered the lense implants, but I've read that this may only correct your vision to such a degree that you may end up having to still wear glasses sometimes anyway!!

I Just cannot get a pair of glases that feel comfortable and fit right, I have long eyelashes and my lashes always touch the lense, IT DRIVES ME MAD. If I adjust the frames so that the lashes don't touch as much the frames look stupid (really sat high and pinching my nose) so I am geting frustrated and upset that I have to wear these horrible things, and they drive me insane every moment I have them on my face :( :( :(

Wei 08 Sep 2005, 23:54

shyiris - do you know of vision training. Unless rx very high there possibity of much vision improvement so need for glasses diminish.

Also is possibilty of contact. I finally success with contact have very good vision with contact.

If rx very hifg is also possibility of lens implant. I consider this now but expenses is high.

If you have continue with glasses, you realize many people love way glasses look so no need for low mood! I symphathize very much after I depress over thick heavy glasses for -16D. Now i have blended myosdic which look nicer and not heavy weight and also contact. I hope you find resolution too. Wei.

George1968 08 Sep 2005, 17:09

How long have you been wearing glasses? Exactly waht do you find wrong with them?

shyiris 08 Sep 2005, 15:53

HELP! I am a 26 year old female who wishes she was dead because of these damn glasses, i really really need some help and support. Sorry if I have posted in the wrong place. The glasses just lower my self esteem and I hate them , and I have lots of questions about them too..

I hope to find some people to help me

Wei 06 Aug 2005, 04:27

I read this thread and am intersted in Psycholgy of Glasses. I interesting that some like very much very glasses but others fearful. I am -16 D so of course have no choice I cannot see anything with no glasses so you are lucky if you are able to chose I think. I think glasses look very nice but my glasses are very thick and not atrractive. I would very much like to wear glasses that are regular. I have myodisc soon with I hear look like low rx glasses and I see pictures but I not really believe until I see for myself.

George1968 05 Aug 2005, 23:40

Clare,

I can't recommend going through a divorce if you are looking for some laughs, but it's not the worse thing in the world, either.

Clare 05 Aug 2005, 22:43

Really sorry to hear about that, it must be difficult for you.

I'm busy with my new job and enjoying it. Life's quite hectic but I'm having a quiet weekend and looking forward to it!

George1968 05 Aug 2005, 16:49

Clare,

Aside from going through the final stages of a divorce, things are OK.

How about you (in general)?

Dave 05 Aug 2005, 16:42

Thanks Clare,

I thought she might be in the 2.5 - 3 range.

Clare 05 Aug 2005, 14:40

It was good but tiring. Great to be back home!!

What have you been up to?

George1968 04 Aug 2005, 21:21

Someone ought to let Tif know that the squinting she does in her pictures does not make her look more attractive than wearing her glasses.

George1968 04 Aug 2005, 21:13

Clare,

Welcome back. How was Frankfurt?

Clare 04 Aug 2005, 14:20

Dave

I'm guessing that she'd be around -3, I'm -2.75 so possibly quite similar to mine.

Dave 27 Jul 2005, 20:36

Clare - How does your -2.5 compare to the girl on the left? I'm wondering what her Rx might be.

http://community.webshots.com/photo/259301573/259303517gKnsqz

ehpc 26 Jul 2005, 16:00

Computer sticking on this thread for some reason.................just testing...............

ehpc 25 Jul 2005, 15:09

Just a mild p***-take you know Phil:)

Phil 25 Jul 2005, 01:36

Clare, come back with greater courage. Hope you have a good trip. Ehpc- patience is a virtue which will bring its rewards: just you wait and see.

Clare 24 Jul 2005, 13:00

Ed - I always wonder if people who talk about how bad their eyesight is just want people to believe it! I don't think mine's dreadful and I don't talk about it. Maybe I'm the unusual one.

Clare 24 Jul 2005, 12:59

Phil, you're right, I've emerged but I'm off to Frankfurt tomorrow! Stay safe Londoners.

ed 23 Jul 2005, 01:12

Clare - I have a friend whose -2.50 and usually wears contacts. But there are times when she doesn't wear them and just spends her time telling people she can't see because she isn't wearing her contacts. I really don't know why she doesn't just get her specs out!

ehpc 22 Jul 2005, 14:55

No offence to anyone or anything:)...............but I have just spent a fascinating couple of hours watching some paint dry. I felt the need for some action-packed adventure, compared with the speed of progress of Phil and Clare's daring plan to meet for coffee..................:) Pete

Phil 22 Jul 2005, 08:52

Lazysiow, I fear you are right. But she won't keep it up. Bet she emerges over the weekend!!!

Lazysiow 22 Jul 2005, 07:55

I bet she's hiding lol

rats 21 Jul 2005, 19:32

Well that explains why I'm -18. I can think of something else that I do that will make you go blind also.

Phil 21 Jul 2005, 10:20

Clare, where are you? Friday's a nice day for a coffee!

Bason 21 Jul 2005, 08:58

Smoking contributes to myopia.

rats 20 Jul 2005, 20:09

I,m on my way to giving it up!

Phil 20 Jul 2005, 05:14

Lazysiow - she'll capitulate! She won't be able to resist my charms.

Katie 20 Jul 2005, 03:48

rats, I hope you are just kidding about having a smoke.

What a terrible and nasty habit.

Lazysiow 20 Jul 2005, 02:45

Gee I cant wait to see how this turns out :)

Phil 20 Jul 2005, 01:37

Clare, so scared you posted "Cclare". Hehe. Sometimes the reality outstrips the imagination. Had a gf in Yorkshire once. Talked a lot before we met. When I saw her I just could not believe it-perfection on legs with gorgeous black fcuk specs about -3, the perfect prescription. Go on, I'll pay!

rats 19 Jul 2005, 19:05

Usually only as long as I can go before that first smoke in the morning.

About 2 minutes!

Chuck 19 Jul 2005, 14:18

Here's a question to ponder: How long do you think you could go after you wake up in the morning without putting on your glasses?

Smudgeur 19 Jul 2005, 12:59

You might be right Clare, I just think it's fun to meet new people.

Clare 19 Jul 2005, 12:36

Wouldn't that destroy our illusions? When I was young I was always SO disappointed when I saw a film after I'd read the book. My own imagination was always far superior to the celluloid translation. Wouldn't this be the same :)

Smudgeur 19 Jul 2005, 12:04

If you'd feel safer with a chaperone, I'd make it a bespectacled threesome (providing it is in London somewhere, during the week) - no strings from me either (married too) just an interest in glasses.

Maybe we should arrange a London spectacle meet in a Starbucks somewhere?

CClare 19 Jul 2005, 11:54

Phil - a tad, yes!

Phil 19 Jul 2005, 00:58

No, I mean it. I know you must be close by and we'd have a laugh. No strings: I'm married. Just a coffee and a squint or two. 07871436620. Are u scared? U can hide behind your specs if u want!

Clare 18 Jul 2005, 12:19

Phil

You're a tease ;)

Phil 18 Jul 2005, 01:18

Clare, I can do that. I can wear all day Sunday, then on Monday be bare-eyed and not squint. Come for that coffee I've offered and I'll show you!

Clare 15 Jul 2005, 16:33

Phil, I know what you mean but today he wore glasses again all day. That's weird! I reckon I might just give a hint now and then.

Phil 15 Jul 2005, 01:52

Clare, Maybe he's good at "managing". I don't think people notice me squinting-certainly no-one has ever remarked. But I'm -3.25 and -3.5 and am almost always "bare-eyed" at work. When you go without your contacts and don't wear your glasses are you good at hiding your short-sightedness? Some people keep banging on about their "blindness". But if you are too shy to wear glasses you hardly want to make people comment do you?

Clare 14 Jul 2005, 12:43

Bob W, hi and thanks for your concern. All I can say is that last Thursday was a wicked day that we've been expecting. Today's 2' silence in the capital was a moving and humbling experience.

My colleague sustains my intrigue. I've taken a close look; he doesn't appear to wear contacts. Can't work it out. We were out last week and he could see as well as me, yet on the couple of occasions he's worn glasses I'd estimate them at around -3. He *must* wear contacts I'm sure because he could see to much without them. Mystified ...

Puffin 13 Jul 2005, 08:26

There's a woman who wears quite thick plus glasses - with an odd purple tint I can't explain - and up until recently she did the on-the-nose trick, but now seems to have given that up and gone to looking through them all the time.

daffy 12 Jul 2005, 23:15

I have a curious question that got me curious today as i went into a bank to do some financing. I noticed that there were two tellers, both in their 40's, wearing plus glasses. They both had normal looking frames, but they both wore them on the tips of their nose - pearing over the top of them when talking to the customers. I notice that a lot of people, particularly women, will do this. Sure, they have reading glasses that are not good for distance (at least for now). What i think they need is bifocals, but i think they may be vain about wearing them as that would mean (virtual) full-time wear. Or they could have got frames that were half-size.

I just thought it is odd, but what do you people think?

Bob W. 12 Jul 2005, 18:29

Clare, How are you holding up after those dreadful bombs? I hope you're alright. When I was visiting a friend's home during my college days, I had an experience that might be along those lines. We were talking about something, when his younger brother said something about perhaps needing his eyes examined. Their father, sitting nearby, immediately started describing about how he first got glasses when he entered the military, and "now I can't even see my feet without them!" It seemed clear to me by the tone of his voice and his facial expression, that he was really upset about this. He was probably in his 40's and -3 ish. We weren't even talking about glasses or vision, and he had been silent before that.

I wonder how much alarm is caused by the progression of nearsightedness over time, besides just the sensation of not being completely "up to par". I don't know if this man's situation is like what you were describing at all. I was thinking in terms of preoccupation with disability, fearfulness, this sort of thing.

Another question I have is the insecurity felt of being without glasses, or rather the alarm at not being able to focus much at all for someone with zip experience going bare-eyed. Not having any experience, I am clueless about how much that could feed into this.

I don't know where this leads, or what the value of going into it is, but I don't recall much discussion on this.

Best Regards, Bob W.

aviator -oo- 11 Jul 2005, 09:14

An appeal to GWG lovers in London or southern England. I need your help. I have a largish collection of glasses with a range of minus lenses, and have many pictures of these being modelled by female friends.

I now need some help constructing a professional looking web site to display these. I am a designer, not a web site programmer. Please note that I want this to be a collaborative exercise, and it is essential that we can meet to discuss the project and our respective ideas.

I am also looking for some new models so that I can photograph the most recent additions to my glasses collection. Are there female glasses fans out there who would be interested in this project? Everything would be above board, and I would encourage you to bring a friend to join in the fun. If you are glasses-curious, heres a chance to try on lots of glasses with every lens strength from minus one to ten.

If there are any serious takers, please contact me at: 100640.2435@compuserve.com

Clare 07 Jul 2005, 12:52

... I meant I've seen him three times with glasses in my couple of months here, oops!

Clare 07 Jul 2005, 12:51

Here's a weird one ... one of my colleagues often refers to his 'poor eyesight'. I've seen him probably 3 times in my couple of months here, certainly no more.

I'm assuming he means without glasses, but if you'd never seen him in specs you'd assume he was partially sighted. Today we were out together and it was obvious that he could see as much as me, but what I can't figure is this - if you wear contacts, as I presume he must, and can apparently see okay why would you keep on about your bad eyesight? Is this an OO in disguise ...?

02 May 2005, 00:13

I think he makes a living giving good advice to people who are happier than he is 8-)

Clare 01 May 2005, 23:36

Thanks for the advice AA! Are you a glasses wearer or just a fan of GWGs?

30 Apr 2005, 22:42

Clare I'm with Christy on the on off about glasses and contacts.

Either your preference is for contacts, knowing there are some situation when you my need to take them out, if you can't see without them and are a danger to your own safety then there is no harm in wearing glasses.

Clare I can't see what the issue is, it would a appear to me you suffer from a lack of confidence, you're a complete personality with contacts, glasses or no glasses, just be Clare and you will solve your problem

Clare I think the issue is with yourself and not those around you. Just be Clare, and to hell what others may think.

AA 30 Apr 2005, 13:39

Clare I,m with Christ on the on off about glasses and contacts.Either your preference is for contacts, knowing there are some situation when you my need to take them out, if you can,t see with out then and are a danger to your own safety than there is no harm in wearing glasses. Clare I can,t see what the issue is, it would a appear to me you suffer from a lack of confidence, your a complete personality with contacts, glasses or no glasses, just be Clare and you will solve your problem,n you solve your problem. Clare I think the issue is with yourself and not those around you. Just be Clare, and to hell what others may think.

30 Apr 2005, 07:14

Petey - how often u wearing them now?

Christy 30 Apr 2005, 05:22

That's close to my prescription and I do.

Kokopelli 29 Apr 2005, 22:41

Go ahead, why not :-)

Petey 29 Apr 2005, 22:37

Should I be wearing my glasses full time if my prescription is -2.25 in the right eye and -1.50 in the left eye?

Christy 19 Apr 2005, 13:42

Clare - keep them on! Learn to love wearing them!

Clare 17 Apr 2005, 12:54

Hey Christy, so what would your recommendation be to someone who might need them often but not always - what should they do? Should they keep them on, or leave them off? It's a dilemma for sure ...

Christy 14 Apr 2005, 00:16

I find the whole on-off-on-off-on-off routine annoying, beaten only by the "I'm sorry I don't have my glasses with me" routine.

leelee 13 Apr 2005, 22:16

I think taking your glasses off to read is less attention getting than fishing your glasses out of your pocket or bag (after squinting and pushing the material away as you do that backwards head lean thing) whenever you need to read something!

My dad must fish his specs out of his jacket pocket 700 times a day! (he doesn't bother to lean back anymore - those days are long gone for him!

My old boyfriend remarked that he couldn't read anything with his glasses on (minus rx) - i didn't realise he was peering beneath!

and of course - the worst would be the "readers on a leash" brings back nightmares of my 5th grade teacher!

and yet, somehow, sunglasses on a leash doesn't seem bad at all! now i have little magnetic clipons which are great (sometimes a little hard to see - double reflections - but much easier than swapping glasses) - I'd probably just be taking them off and go bare-eyed without them if i had a seperate pair.

George1968 13 Apr 2005, 15:46

Clare,

Things are going fine. Spring is finally here, so what could be wrong?

So you are starting a new job? I hope it turns out the way you want.

Clare 13 Apr 2005, 10:11

George 1968 - no, taking them off isn't an issue - although I remember reading here someone's advice that it drew more attention than leaving them on. Unlike an older friend of mine, I don't yet have a problem with reading with them on, but as someone who doesn't feel dependent on glasses I tend to take them off when I don't need them. I don't have to do anything right now, I don't start till next month! Good to hear from you. How's it going?

George1968 13 Apr 2005, 08:00

Clare,

Would taking your glasses on and off at work be a problem for you? I take my glasses off for reading, then put them back on for everything else. Never been a hassle. Besides, 5-10 years from now, I would be taking them off anyway (or have to succumb to bifocals).

Did you take a new job yet?

Clare 12 Apr 2005, 23:15

George 1968 - yes that thought had occurred to me! It's tempting to do that some of the time at least!

Clare 12 Apr 2005, 23:14

Bob W - if I were to take the plunge and change my image by wearing glasses not contacts at work, I know they'd be on and off. That was the pattern last year when I had the eye infection. As I'm not used to wearing them my instinct is to take them off for things I can do without them for, like reading. It's possible though that a large open-plan office would mean they'd be on more than off.

Bob W. 04 Apr 2005, 15:51

Hi Clare!

I'm in Portland, Oregon. I wasn't being clear about it. I believe you are correct about someone commenting about your squinting, very little chance for anything but an insulting remark. Why couldn't someone come up with something friendly, helpful, or supportive in such a situation? I was trying to leave any connections between "standard" or desired image and wanting to present as having good vision very tenuous just to ask what your thoughts were along that line. Our past behavior overwhelmingly determines our behavior in the future, so I wouldn't go and anticipate anything just yet. It usually takes major changes in motivation. Sometimes it's fun to just imagine what a change would bring. There is even some opportunity, depending on many factors, to experiment a little before the change in firms.

You are a person in charge, and certainly competent to make major decisions in your life, such as when to and when not to live in a blur! Your have stuck through thick and thin on this site to continue acquiring information about your near-sighted condition. Perhaps it isn't so much unusual to not go for the specs when the CL's get out, as to continue using your vision as is a lot of the time outside of the work environment, if I understand correctly. If you wore specs at work, would you wear them full-time do you think, or much of the time off, a little of paralleling when off work, or, in between? I'm thinking of close work, reading correspondence, reports, looking at the computer screen, vs. looking around the place, or relaxing a bit, walking somewhere, going to a meeting/ presentation. I don't know what I'm talking about really.

Best Regards,

Bob W.

George1968 02 Apr 2005, 14:55

Clare,

Have you ever thought that with the start of the new job that you could wear your glasses at work (with people who don't have preconceived notions of what you look like) and then wear CLs socially (which would alleviate your perception of being attractively challenged wearing glasses)?

Clare 02 Apr 2005, 13:53

Bob, yes, often for me whats presented is important. Im not sure what you interpret about my standard and its relationship to uncompromised vision but yes, I am in a senior leadership position and, years ago, had thought that maybe a bespectacled image would uphold it. Im soon to make another senior appointment in a new company and have an opportunity to present a different image if I choose. If I had the courage this would be the time to adopt glasses and abandon the CLs!

As to my friends interpretation she would have little sympathy! I think Ive been to Portland, if its Portland in Maine, back in 1996 and I had a splendid time! In gyms here too I think its commonplace to be bare-eyed but the only unusual thing is, perhaps, the tendency of others to comment!

Bob W. 01 Apr 2005, 21:09

Hi Clare! In the past you have said, something like, you felt the need to present a certain image or at least a sense of being in control, or something to that effect, if I remember correctly. Are you in a supervisory or team leadership role by any chance? If I did not err too much in my recollection, it sounds like you do have this "standard", which I can certainly relate to. Is that perhaps part of having uncompromised vision? My standards are usually internally set, not set by others around me. I'll leave it at that for now since I might be on thin ice on my recollective abilities as well as my assumptions about that.

I was happy to "hear" you say that you could not see 'something' in the distance, vs. not see 'a thing'. That is a positive on your part about your vision! I wonder what your friend actually thought about you running around bare-eyed. You are probably correct in your assumption. Your experience in the gym is still interesting. Here in the US of A, at least in Portland, the city of Roses, it is common for both sexes to be bare-eyed while working out. Maybe there isn't much squinting, since, perhaps, they do not try to see details. Maybe your only "crime" is to continue visually functioning in the bare-eyed condition!

Best Regards,

Bob W.

Clare 29 Mar 2005, 23:01

Bob W - I think the embarrassment comes from the forced admission that you cant see whatever it is. My friend, for example, obviously knows I wear contacts. I didnt follow it up but she might have thought that I was wearing them and still couldnt see something in the distance! She very kindly offered me her own glasses but I declined. I think, had we discussed it, her view would have been like many here how ridiculous, if you cant see it why dont you wear glasses? Some people can be quite judgmental about it.

I think whether being caught out matters depends on how comfortable you are with your vision in the first place. Some people happily discuss how bad they think their eyesight is and are quite comfortable with others knowing it. But if you effectively hide that from people as I do by wearing contacts - then that doesnt happen. The situation you describe with your cousins wife, and the comments I received from the guy in the gym, are embarrassing because they reveal something hidden. Those who wear their glasses advertise the fact that they need them; without them squinting would be expected - and excused! I know some people find squinting quite a turn on, that seems strange to me, it doesn't even seem attractive!

Its probably worse the weaker the prescription is, because expectations of what you can see are greater. Also Im probably a bit weird in that I wear contacts a lot but when not wearing them that doesnt correspond with wearing glasses a lot.

I presume youre a teacher. Your approach to giving the students confidence about their eyesight is great.

Bob W. 29 Mar 2005, 21:56

Hi Clare! I'm responding to your March 24th post under vision. It's apparent that "getting caught" seems to be a pretty unpleasant experience. I suppose that might have something to do with how that "getting caught" occurs. Your friend suggesting you get your eyes examined is distinctly undermining of positive self-image. You didn't mention what the fellow in the gym said about your squinting at the tv, but clearly the impact on you was negative.

I know that when I noticed my cousin's wife shortly after taking off her prescription sunglasses was squinting out a window to look at a passing car, her turning around to see that I had seen it was distinctly unpleasant for her. If looks could kill, I would have been instant toast! I hadn't known that she was nearsighted before that since she avoided wearing glasses, and, being some time ago, contacts weren't very common.

How does one "notice" straining/squinting, without casting some sort of unpleasant experience on the other person. In my situation, it's me looking at some woman. Obviously, staring or gawking are out. It's usually hard for me to keep my wits about me about then any way, but I try to manage a quick smile, looking away quickly.

I've tried to think of someway to react that could be more towards a positive self-image enhancing manner, but that seems pretty lame. Something like, my a bare-eyed dare devil, or what's your Rx, you seem to really do quite well considering, etc. Pretty lame, considering coming from a pot bellied 50'ish, ok 55'ish guy who has got no business carrying on like that.

I'd get slapped silly for that's a most sensuous squint you have there.

I do try around the school to build things up a bit for the young ones. If they complain that they've got bad eyes, I look closely at their eyeballs, and tell them that they aren't misbehaving one bit, or if weak eyes, I correct them, their vision is just as precise as the next person's, just the range of focus is a bit unhandy, etc.

There must be some way that nearsighted eyes could be proudly displayed by their owners, just as their specs, which they spend so much time and money in choosing, sort of wearing the near sighted condition on their sleeve, so to speak, their glasses on their nose, in their hair, clipped to their front, hanging from straps, whatever, and be at peace with that, and not have to give 2 hoots if some fellow notices when they squint at something.

Enough rambling.

Best regards,

Bob W.

Niki 11 Mar 2005, 07:46

I recently had my prescription increased. I hadn't had my eyes checked in almost 5 years. I am now -5.75, -2 in my left eye and - 5.00, - 1.75 in my right. I can't wear contacts so will be forced to wear these hideous glasses. I feel so embarassed and still wear my old prescription at work as I don't want my colleagues knowing how shortsighted I am. While my boyrfried finds me very sexy, I'm worried about going out in public with my new glasses. Has anyone had the same experience?

Please help!

squinty 08 Dec 2004, 12:46

katy,

he was the shy guy all the other girls were ignoring ...

Lia 08 Dec 2004, 11:38

Hello Opal - I'm new here too so finding my way around! I know what you mean about being self conscious, when I was younger I was like that too. Now though I think it's easier to feel more confident because glasses are so popular/fashionable. Do you know why you feel self confident? Is it because you have what you describe as a 'weak' prescription so maybe you feel you don't need them or at least that's what people will think? Or don't you like your glasses? What are they like? I certainly don't think that glasses are a fashion accessory for me but I know plenty of people I'd say they definately are. We were shopping for a new pair of glasses for a colleague earlier this week and our male friend said - it depends if you want a pair of glasses or you want 'style'. He meant some glasses just are glasses, others make a statement. You have to be bold to do the latter but maybe that's what you need, an accessory not a remedy!

Katy 08 Dec 2004, 07:24

Squinty - lucky you too! Where do people find them? :-)

squinty 08 Dec 2004, 06:30

my guy realy loved to show off his superhuman ultra close focusing power.

Once we cracked open that avenue of discussion, we progressed to compatative tests as to just how close he could see with them, without them, how close I could see with them (not close!) how far, etc. we started do'in it while he wore them (more exciting!) and so on. When he wanted to get me all freaked out he would whip them off while driving (I would then grab the wheel) I would examine and describe the cut in, and try to get him to turn his head just so to see if I could see clear around to the other side (not quite)

I think it was a great relief to him that I was not turned off (not at all), and that I understood that in reality - his eyes were super powerfull!

Opal 08 Dec 2004, 03:01

My Rx is very weak: -.50

Katy 08 Dec 2004, 02:53

Sharon - lucky you! That sounds like a high prescription, so if you have known him for a long time it is strange he hasn't said anything about his glasses. It sounds like he is either shy about them and worried that you might try them on and comment on how strong they are, or really doesn't like taking them off because he can only see for a few cms. Keep us posted! :-)

Opal - I think that question was meant for you, not meant to be from you.

Opal 07 Dec 2004, 21:59

hey that wasn't me -- if there was another Opal on here first, i'll change my posting name immediately, just let me know.

thanks

Opal 07 Dec 2004, 21:56

What's your Rx?

squinty 07 Dec 2004, 18:55

Sharon,

Do you wear glasses? If so, you can always compare notes. If not, you could mention that you think you might need them, or that you eyes are getting all tired when you work, or that your mother has been bugging you to go. Tell him you are scared to go, and let him encourage you (maybe he'll even go with you!). This will be your chance to ask all kinds of things like: what is it like, what do they do? What if I have to get glasses? What what it like for you, and on and on.

Another thing you can do is get him to inspect really tiny things - ask if you have something in your eye (this is a top favorite, as he'll have to take his glasses off and then get ~very~very~close.

If it sounds like I have some experience here, I do!

good luck!

Opal 07 Dec 2004, 18:51

Hi, I posted awhile back in the vision thread under the user name "a new wearer" but after all my lurking...i figured it was time for a proper username.

Does anyone find it very difficult to have a conversation with someone while wearing glasses ?(obviously this is not intended for those with high prescriptions) I am fairly comfortable going around in public, ordering a sandwich in a deli (indeed...i couldn't do this without them) saying hello, having "quick conversations" but anytime i run into someone and spend more than about 30 seconds talking to them, i'm automatically compelled to remove my glasses. I just feel that they form a "wall of separation" that creates tremendous distance myself and my interlocutor. I just feel conversations are more natural and intimate without them, and can't bring myself to keep them on. They experience might be part of being a relatively new wearer (since last June) but a friend of mine who has worn glasses longer and recently went full time also feels the same way.

Sharon 07 Dec 2004, 18:02

Here's one that I haven't read about yet. I have been 'friends' with this guy for years, and just recently we've been spending more time together, I guess on the way to maybe becoming 'more than friends'. The thing is, in all the years I've known him I have never seen him withOUT his glasses on. If he is switching to sunglasses it's one pair off, the other on immediately and vice versa. I've yet to get into a conversation about anything "eye" related as yet, but as I have been reading through the posts here think that I might like to. I couldn't begin to guess his prescription, except to say that the cut-in goes to about a third to a half way into the middle of the lenses. They not particularly thick per se, but they could well be high index. They certainly seem to minimize his eyes, but having not ever really seen him bare-eyed except for a few split seconds, I can't tell you much more. How do I get started on such a conversation, and how can I get to see him without glasses? On the more "personal" side of things, we've exchanged a few quick kisses, but nothing that encouraged removal of his glasses. Any thoughts? I'm not certain as to whether I've been specifically attracted to his glasses-wearing, but I am intrigued by how he NEVER is without them and wonder what he looks like without them on as well. Thanks a bunch!

specs4ever 17 Sep 2004, 18:03

Hey Russian, here we would call that Murphy's Law. I have experienced every one of your points - quite a few times.

Puffin 17 Sep 2004, 07:03

Also - when there is a beautiful woman with thick glasses - someone else luckier than me is with her. :(

Russian 17 Sep 2004, 05:32

When I see the beautiful woman - I regret, that she does not wears glasses.

When I see the beautiful woman with glasses - I regret, that her glasses are not strong enough.

When I see the beautiful woman with strong glasses, I regret, that my wife is near me this moment.

What it is law? Why so? Who can answer?

*\* 16 Sep 2004, 07:53

I thought it was telling that these guys:

http://www.artisanlens.com/eng/overw/voorw/voorw.htm don't include people with corrections between +1 to -3 in their pool of potential users. My evil prior boss had lasik a couple of years ago and, though she is well under 40, is now wearing substantial plus lenses to read.

Ree 15 Sep 2004, 20:13

I agree with specs4ever. That people and ladies in particular over -8 will do anything to reduce their dependability on glasses or at least reduce the thickness of their glasses, some of them who I know are near desperate. One of the reasons as mentiond by S4e is that these people do not have good vision even with glasses. I have observed that each one has different problems with high myopia. Most commonly being limited peripheral vision especially those who go in for myodiscs to reduce the lens thickness. So thus these people are going in for lasik or anyother proceedure , but there are still a good number of gwg who remain glasses wearers due to various reasons , financial constraint being one of them.

specs4ever 15 Sep 2004, 18:09

Well, Russian, the century old stigma about wearing glasses is gradually wearing off. Every day we find more and more people who no longer feel compelled to remove their glasses every time they go out in public.

However, you are correct in your thinking that those with severe shortsightedness will go to any method to reduce or eliminate it. The artisan lens has been undergoing trials since the mid 90's, and has just been released for regular use in the USA. And there are many very nearsighted people who have been waiting for this day. But I think I read that it costs about $3,000.00 USD per eye to have this implant done, so there will not be an immediate rush to have the procedure done.

I think that in the future, people who wear glasses of less than -3D will be inclined to leave things well enough alone, wearing contact lenses ocasionally for special days, and wearing glasses for other days. The first wave of lasik is now coming up on the 10 year mark, and I predict that many of these people will be wearing glasses for farsightedness - likely in the +2 or +3D range, with a bifocal add of at least +2D. This will cause low myopes to reconsider their ideas for this opperation, and will make them more content to wear glasses.

But, I think that lasik will still be popular for people from -3D up to -9D, and the lens implants will cover the higher numbers. As you know, people who are very nearsighted really do not have very good vision, and they will grab at any straws. And the Artisan Implants are a much safer option.

In this world there are probably enough myopes around to satisfy all of the men who want girls wearing glasses. But, it isn't possible to come right out and tell the world that you are looking for a girl who wears glasses, and until that day arrives, we will loose many wonderful GWG's to surgery.

Russian 15 Sep 2004, 11:14

Hi to all!

I have found interesting message on Russian internet-site. I hope my translation is clear for all:

The book Men prefer short-sighted women was published in Paris recently - Russian magazine "Health" has written. Among 28 % parisian women having short-sightedness, the parameter of intelligence is higher, than as a whole on the country.

According the statistics, 44 % of people in the world with a high parameter of intelligence are short-sightedness. 39 % of men consider, that short-sighted women are much more sexual than girl with normal sight. They are more sensitive to touches and smells. That they badly see, they need to be approached to the interlocutor more close, and by virtue it is easier to them to establish communication.

69 % of men prefer short-sighted women for their mind, sexuality and charm.

Fine statistics!

French! Who read this book?

Russian 15 Sep 2004, 04:53

Puffin, s4e

Supervision. There are more than 10 millions population in Moscow. I live in this city. Minimum of 1 million (I think, that it is more really) are constantly wearing glasses for short-sightedness. It will be still more with far-sighted. Really one of ten is every day glasses wearing. It is a rarity to observe GWG with a high short-sightedness now. Contact lenses and laser operations are the main reason. All of us know it. Who has statistics about percent of low, average and high short-sightedness on 1 thousand of population? I think, that it is approximately identical in Moscow, London and New York. I think also, that the quantity of the REAL GWGs fans is much less, than quantity of GWG.

It can be paradox, but quantity of GWG which do not hide their poor vision behind contact lenses is the more, than more are quantity of men really consider itself GWG's fans. The women always correctly react to desires of the men. We should create the Party of GWG's fans, which should be known, if to live under the laws of a society. Certainly, it is a joke, but in it there is a sense. There is a law of the market " demand gives rise to the offer ". I think, that this more effective means, than to prove GWG, that their thick glasses look is more tremendous!

Puffin 14 Sep 2004, 14:39

Russian

Don't worry about the English. I have been struggling with Russian for a while and I expect this situation to last as long as I live.

I am also glad to see we have GWG admirers all across the world!

Specs4ever 14 Sep 2004, 13:56

I am also happy to see fans of GWG's from other countries here. I know it must be difficult to understand the "varients" in the english languahe, because no matter how much book learning a person has, they can never properly understand the words, or implications that are used as slang.

The statement that Puffin uses, Thin at any cost, means that women from England and Canada, and the USA want the thinnest possibble lenses at any cost. No more are they willing to wear nice thick regular plastic lenses, htye must have the thinnest high index lenses that are available. And it is funny, because a -3 in regular plastic, and a -3 in high index really don't look much different.

Russian 14 Sep 2004, 07:04

Puffin

It is very pleasant for me to receive the invitation to conversation from the man which stories I has read. These stories have liked me. About some stories I would like to talk separately.

I study sites of Eyescene more than 3 months. Has read much, but not all. Complicates not so good knowledge of the English language (really, my knowledge is good for the citizen of Russia, but bad for the European - we have other level on English. Russia was long closed for West, therefore there was no large necessity to study foreign languages). Now this circumstance complicates fast development of mutual understanding between West and Russia. But I was in Europe many times therefore I understand western people and their mentality well. Unfortunately, I do not understand meaning of the term "thin-at-any-cost". If you speak about frame, now we have a huge variety of a choice in shops of optics. The majority frame is made not in Russia, but the prices are less, than same in Europe. It is feature of the Russian market. Russian GWG try to imitate a style of West in wearing of frames. The Russian women were always focused on a style of Western Europe. It is difficult to me to tell, what is clean Russian style. I think, that it someone has thought up. There are many good designers in Russia, but an example for a style of clothes always were Paris, London, Roma, New York and others.

However I am not the good expert of frames, their types and names. But I have opinion. I consider, that the glasses are the part of clothes. I think, that the eyes of the peoples are an intimate part of body. In spite of the fact that they are open for all. Eyes of the man, and of the woman especially, always were mysterious. " Eyes are the mirror of the soul ". And soul - this is the most mysterious at the woman (man). Intimate and mysterious are concepts have close meaning. There is no woman (man), which well knows even own soul. Therefore being by the certain clothes for eyes of a glass are intimate clothes. Undoubtedly, glass, is especial with the strong instruction, are interesting optical object for supervision. Than more strongly glasses - the more latent and mysterious are eyes, the more surprising optical effect. That would like to find out this secret more strongly. Certainly, this very primitive comparison, as well as my knowledge of the English language. If I wrote on literary English, this description would turn out more poetic and romantically. I think, that it is one of many answers to a question, why we are the fans of GWG. The most part of our psychology and temperament has the beginning in genetics. Love to GWG I would like to name spiritual erotic fetishism. How do you think?

Puffin 13 Sep 2004, 16:59

Welcome Russian, it is interesting that you write because a lot of the best GWG's I've seen on the web are from Russian dating agencies! There seems more variety of frame styles, less of the "thin-at-any-cost" mentality and generally things seem a whole lot better. Is this really how it is there?

Russian 13 Sep 2004, 14:50

Hi to all!

Excellent conversation! I regret, that many GWGs fans in Russia do not know about it. I am ready to reply, which you me will ask for the beginning about a situation with GWG in Russia and about Russian Psychology of Glasses. Unfortunately, my English language not is very good, but I understand it enough. Unfortunately too, it is better to have a poor sight, than a poor knowledge of the English language on Eyescene! But I hope, everyone will help me to become the good interlocutor on this page. I would like to begin the participation with answers to your questions.

Puffin 23 Aug 2004, 14:13

Does anyone remember the "game" of "guess who". You know, it was like someone came up behind you, covered your eyes with their hands and said "guess who"? Harmless fun, I suppose. There was a spate of it when I was 12, and the following year (I've remembered this suddenly for no apparent reason) I remember there was this girl with glasses, who wore them just about all the time, and someone did it to her - she freaked out a bit: as I remember, she cried out "my glasses" (unsurprisingly in the circumstances)

For some reason I found that oddly appealing, or interesting, I can't think of the right word. Does anyone else remember some experience like this?

Puffin 18 Aug 2004, 15:13

CDT:

Plano base curve means the fronts of the lenses are flat. The reason why this is so is to reduce the thickness of the lenses. As I understand matters, it seems that plano front lenses are a good option from minus 6 and more or less obligatory from minus 8 and above.

Given that the prescription is around minus 6, it is possible to accuse the optician of being a little over enthusiastic in insisting on them - perhaps he really hates thick lenses, or something like that.

It is also possible to say that if your daughter also has a relatively high amount of astigmatism, that will also add thickness, so encouraging the optician to act as he did.

As for your daughter struggling to see with them, there are two possibilities:

either they've been made wrong - unlikely, but possible. The other is that she's not used to them yet. I know someone (young) who got new glasses, complained about them, and promptly had their old glasses "hidden away" - and lo and behold, no more complaints.

LongTimeLurker 18 Aug 2004, 11:29

We are really impressed with your wit and style. No wonder you describe yourself as a lurker. You sound like a typical lurking dipshit who cannot get in the game of life. Save the punctuation lessons learned in grade 11. Your cleverness is easily surpassed by your incredibly boring waste of thread space.

CDT 18 Aug 2004, 11:14

I am not sure if this is the right place to post this question- it seemed so with the earlier posts but then with the most recent I am not so sure. If another thread is better, please advise. My daughter just received a new (stronger)prescription for her glasses and also selected new frames. She is 16 and has been wearing glasses since about the age of 8, with each pair getting slightly stronger. She has never liked wearing glasses but did so out of necessity. Her doctor would not consider contacts until her eyes stabilised first. This time her prescription increased a greater amount, 1.0 more in each eye, to -5.75 left and -6.50 right. The prescription slip we presented to the optician had an additional instruction from the doctor that said "plano base curve". We asked the optician and were told it was just designating the type of lens to use. My daughter Lindsay was very upset when we went to pick up her new glasses because, to her, they looked much stronger on her even though she said the vision was better through them. She has always worn them from first thing in the morning but for the past couple of days refuses to put them on. She said she hates their appearance and has been squinting like crazy to try to see things. We do not have her old glasses because we usually donate them at the office. She will wear them in her room and at the house but will not put them on to go outside. We have refused, obviously, to let her drive without them, and have seen her pull up and immediately remove them. I spoke with the optician who recommended I call the doctor, who in turn said that as her prescription continues to increase she has to have this type of flat front lens and will from here on out. The glasses do appear stronger, in part because they are! I've tried to explain this to her, and that she looks just great with them but she won't listen. The doctor said to just give it time because she will soon enough realize just how dependent she is upon them and how she cannot do much without them. Is this true or is there anything I can do to speed up this process? Thank you.

LongTimeLurker 18 Aug 2004, 08:48

Sambo,

When trying to be rude, it would give your point much more force and effect if you could use correct grammar and punctuation. In the English language, the interrogative, more commonly referred to as a YES/NO question, ends with a question mark (?), not an exclamation point (!) as illustrated by the following two examples:

1) Sambo, do YOU give blowjobs?

2) Could you cease going off topic?

Puffin 18 Aug 2004, 04:33

Sambo: No I don't

Lentifan: I think we're at least in the hurt/comfort area, perhaps in the "able disabled bit"? I don't think the woman knew about us - and the map is 2 years old.

Wow, there are some things on there I'd never heard of - and I got some great laughs looking at it eg "Human parrots"

Sambo 18 Aug 2004, 00:27

Puffin, With a name like yours, do you give blowjobs!

lentifan 17 Aug 2004, 15:37

I didn't see us anywhere on the fetish map, although I may have missed it. It wasn't easy to navigate.

Assuming I didn't miss it, does this mean she (the map author)thinks were not abnormal?

Electra 17 Aug 2004, 06:23

Incidentally (now THERE'S a pun) someone mentioned orthodontics. Officially, glasses are my one and only fetish, and orthodontics never did anything for me. In fact it tends to creep me out when I see them on adults, like "Oh how vain can you get?". Then I watched Secret Window.

Electra 17 Aug 2004, 06:21

I did a little piece about this in my Live Journal: http://www.livejournal.com/users/electra_mig/823.html

There's something in the dependence thing, but I can't put my finger on it. Planos do nothing for me.

Puffin 17 Aug 2004, 06:06

I suppose I should have mentioned the transformational quality of glasses from "normal" to "looks great" and the magical-seeming way they convert blur to clarity - and the dependence issue.

Puffin 17 Aug 2004, 06:04

This is interesting too:

http://www.deviantdesires.com/map/mappics/map81002.gif

It's a map of (mostly) human sexual fetish. I think the A-Bomb fetish is really taking things a little far, though. What's sexy about subatomic forces?

Puffin 17 Aug 2004, 05:50

I found this about Ballooners

http://www.deviantdesires.com/map/balloon.html

I can kind of grasp what they're getting at with this - but really, it's not for me. I wouldn't get a sexual rush out of a balloon being popped (?)

Makes our little community somewhat more normal, no? I mean, it does involve women, beauty, accepting people for what they are, etc etc - not just a bit of smelly rubber.

D-W-V 17 Aug 2004, 05:03

Bizarre magazine did a special fetish issue a while back, and balloons was about the strangest fetish. This was the web site they used as an example:

http://www.mellyloon.com

best coffee table magazine ever: http://www.bizarremag.com

Puffin 17 Aug 2004, 03:32

Some kind of blow-job?

Bobby 16 Aug 2004, 16:48

I do not do anything with them, but the baloon fetishists get turned on by blowing them.

Puffin 16 Aug 2004, 05:20

What do you do with the balloons?

Bobby 16 Aug 2004, 04:10

Yes, balloons are the strangest for me too, as it is only about balloons. On the other hand, I can understand big butt/tits fetish, flat chest fetish, long hair f., freckes f. as they are about human body. Also some clothes fetishes are easy to understand. The fetish issue is a fascinating topic for me. I wish I had studied harder when I was young to have a chance to study pschology and sexuology. Fetishes would have been my main job.

D-W-V 16 Aug 2004, 03:29

Balloons.

Puffin 15 Aug 2004, 18:01

What is the weirdest fetish you've ever heard of?

BTW the amputee fetish thing seems to be mostly collections of pics of women with their limbs airbrushed off (badly), and some old black and white pics from the 50's and 60's before decent artificial limbe appeared.

Bobby 15 Aug 2004, 13:44

I cant give it up. It is impossible.

Chris 15 Aug 2004, 12:16

There but for the grace of God..........

Electra 15 Aug 2004, 11:06

Who wants to be cured? I've given most of my life to my addiction, no intention of stopping. I see no harm in it.

I could see harm in the amputee one, oh my, and they call US weird?

Puffin 15 Aug 2004, 10:38

I did read somewhere (I think it was an amputee fetish group) that someone admitted 'I tried giving up but it was like giving up smoking'.

I really don't think I could ever give this up. Moreover, I feel myself slowly sinking into it further year by year. I'm addicted, I suppose.

Bobby 15 Aug 2004, 06:28

I can second what David LL has said except for I am not a gay, so some "fakes" get me turned on, and I am not into orthodontic braces. (However, I can understand some kinds of wheelchair fetish and legbrace fetish quite well.)

Puffin 10 Aug 2004, 15:53

That must be some form of erotic minimalism (!)

Electra 10 Aug 2004, 13:43

God knows what the shrinks would make of me then. I have in my collection an erotic photo (in my view) of a pair of glasses laying on a desk. Nobody wearing them. Lock me away!

Puffin 06 Aug 2004, 16:58

I've said this before, but from the point of view of sexual stimulation, it does not actually matter whether the story/person is real or not. Btw the stories I write are not real... hope you all realise that! I just have little slices of reality in them. Hope this makes sense.

David_Llewellyn 06 Aug 2004, 16:11

It's certainly really easy to judge other people by reading a few emails and conclude that they're "sickos" or whatever. I call that the amateur analysis hour. People are very complex and develop fetishes for all kinds of reasons. I have a very strong fetish for eyeglasses, and also for orthodontic braces, but I also have a boyfriend of over 20 years who doesn't wear either and who has not the slightest interest in either subject.

The world is much more full of fetishes than we like to admit. Take a look at advertising which concentrates heavily on fulfilling (mostly male in this case) fantasies (e.g., this car will get you a beautiful woman, etc... the car becomes a surrogate for a relationship.)

-----------

I echo the sentiment expressed that particularly young people should be cautious about believing stories posted here. For example, while powerful Rxs are about evenly divided between males and females in reality, on this board probably 95% of the powerful Rxs posted seem to belong to women. How is that possible? It isn't, statistically. My conclusion is that a high percentage are fakers, mostly (straight) males posing as females because it provides a turn-on to them. (Since I'm a gay male, these stories do nothing for me, which is one reason I'm an infrequent contributor... I've just heard the same story of a woman who needs myodiscs, etc. so many times already!!!!) Have fun, but don't believe everything you read!!!!

daffy 05 Aug 2004, 17:40

my remark was directed to 774, but sambo, thanx for the compliments, and maybe i will just go and see a shrink (not).

Puffin 05 Aug 2004, 13:53

Leave us OO's and glasses fetishists alone. We have enough to contend with, what with trying to find suitable partners and also trying to persuade people that glasses look good. I don't think I ever chose to like glasses - I didn't choose to like big tits either, or women either - that's how I am, and that individuality is the best thing I have.

! 05 Aug 2004, 07:09

hey leave daffy alone, he's a lovely duck!

Sambo 05 Aug 2004, 00:41

daffy, Yes you need to see a shrink! I have read some of your posts, and you are a sicko!

daffy 04 Aug 2004, 22:00

so should I see a shrink if I hate women with ugly feet? I used to like Bionce, but when I saw her feet...urghhh...

my point is, we all have preferences. We get turned on by certain attributes and get turned off by others. My 2c

Guest 3 04 Aug 2004, 16:52

774, I actually agree with your answer, if you are attracted to the whole person, but one of the attributes which was physicallooks, such as nice eyes, a nice smile, the expression on the face, nice boobs, nice figure, and dare I add nice fashionable glasses which some of us think is an added attribute to a ladies attractiveness then I see no harm in this.Using a phyical weakness such as poor sight for sexual satisfaction I abhor, if i was so inclined I would seek medical help, because, also if one was in a serious relationship, was the person in love with the glasses and not the person, dangerous to have a fetish in a loving relationship if you could call it that.

Jennifer 04 Aug 2004, 13:50

774:

Not to be offensive against your line of work...but I think you are reading more into this. You are analyzing this psychologically and trying to find an answer for such behavior. In chatting with you recently on Lens Chat I detected that in your questions. Most of us enjoy having fun with our fetish and you shouldn't try to read more into it. I personally don't feel there is anything wrong with me!

774 04 Aug 2004, 06:50

There's no need for you to feel you have to defend yourself Guest 3, as I think we can safely assume you don't fall into the categories I consider worrysome. As you rightly say, attraction is a very individual thing, and anyone who is emotionally healthy would consider the whole person. But not everyone does, which was the point I was trying to make. A man who seeks control over a woman by way of her being suddenly very vulnerable is no different to a rapist, psychologically.

Big ES Fan 03 Aug 2004, 20:59

I think there are many more people out there that are attracted to women and men with glasses than most realize. I have known this since I was six or seven years old. I know my father was, by what he said when my mother put hers on. I also had realitives that made comments over the years which reinforced what I already knew. I go to a coffee shop often, where I socialize with a gentleman that is seventy nine years old and he always comments on nice looking women with glasses,that come into the store, more so than the ones that are bare eyed. Everyone has different tastes but to me there is nothing more beautiful than a woman that is made up, with makeup,nice clothes,jewelry and a beautiful pair of glasses that adorn her face like fine jewels. All women are beautiful in thier own way, but some are more special than others.

Guest 3 01 Aug 2004, 06:18

774 I have chatted to you atlength in the chat room, men fancy ladies for all sorts of reasons, or to be more accurate are attracted, in the first instance guys in the chat room just happen to be attracted to ladies wearing glasses, as your aware what we see hear and touch molds our future, so if our first image was a lady in glasses there,s a strong possibility thats an image in later life we find attractive, I think to lump all of us together as having some fetish about glasses is wrong.

Image play a big part in being attracted to the opposite sex, glases maybe part of that attraction, but to read more into it than that is just an opinion.

I find fetishes a rather sad sexual urge, which has no being on a loving long term relationship, to me a fetish can best be summed up as lust, lust after an image that distorts the clarity of a loving relationship.

I think anyone who considers seeing their children have high RX,s should seek professional help urgently. or any adult who wishes to increase their rx is sick.

May I add 774 you dont make friends with glasses, you don,t make tue love with glasses but the look of someone wearing glasses can be an introduction because the look is an appealing image at first sight.

774 31 Jul 2004, 08:26

I think most of you would admit to being a little strange, a little quirky, perhaps odd, weird, or whatever the buzz term is. Nothing negative about this, we're all different, we all have our unusual little ways. I've seen some very strange tastes and behaviours both on the BBS and in chat, but mostly harmless. Just humans being diverse an